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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD 



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THE MIEROE 

OF 

TETJE WOMANHOOD 

A BOOK OF INSTRUCTION 

FOB 

tSBLamtn in i\t SStorli* 

BY THE 

KEV. BERNARD O'REILLY, L.D. 

(LAVAL.) 

$ejrfttkb bom Ijje ff feirtwnljj ^nuriuan tfbiiimt 

" At the present day, I swear to thee, that there are Women in the World 
of such excellence, that I have more envy of the life which they lead in 
secret, than of all the Sciences which the Ancients taught in public."— 
Antonio db Guevara; 

Sjctonb tfbiiion. 
DUBLIN 

M. H. GILL & SON, 50 UPPER SACKVILLE STREET 
1883 

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M. II. GILL AND SON, PRINTERS, DUBLIN. 



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TO 

THE MEMORY OP 

TAKEN FROM ME IN MY CHILDHOOD 
AN IRREPARABLE LOSS, 
AND A LIFE-LONG REGRET. 



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gmprimshtr: 

* JOHN CARDINAL M'CLOSKY, 

ARCHBISHOP OF NEW YORK. 

New York, Nov. 10th, 1877. 



Archiepiscopal Residence, Quebec, 
November 16, 1877. 
Rev. B. O'Reilly, New York. 

Reverend and dear Sib, — I received in good time your 
letter of the 6th instant, with the first 256 pages of your 
last work, " The Mirror of True Womanhood." 

Before sending you an answer I wished to read a few 
chapters of this book, and now I can but congratulate and 
thank you for it. 

Pray accept once more my congratulation and thanks, and 
believe me your devoted servant, 

ii« E. A., Archbishop of Quebec 



Cincinnati, 

November 12, 1877. 
Reverend and dear Sir, — Thanks for your beautiful new 
book, «* The Mirror of True Womanhood.* Like St. Francis 
de Sales' " Devout Life," written, I think, at the suggestion 
of the Bon Henri (Henry IV. of France), it shows, that if we 
should look for the perfect religious in convents, perfection Is 
also attainable in the world. 
May God grant you the multos annos to write more books ! 
Yours sincerely, 

* J. B. PURCELL, Archbp., Cincinnati. 



278 Ohio-street, Chicaqc, 
November 12, 1877. 

Rev. Db. O'Reilly, 

Dear Rev. Sir,— The new work of which I have received 
the advance sheets to-day, "The Mirror of True Womanhood, ' 
is a work fitted to the times. It will be of vast service to 
many mothers and daughters in the Church, by showing them 
how they may practically conform their lives to the bright 
pictures of womanly virtue you have so felicitously portrayed. 
And if others outside the Church may be induced to look into 
your pages, how many may be saved who are eager to do good 
and live virtuously, and have no one to teach them ! 
Gratefully your servant, 
* THOMAS FOLEY, Bishop Adm. Chicago. 

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THE AUTHOR'S PREFACE. 



It is not without diffidence that this book is sent 
forth to take its place in the literature of Chris- 
tian households. The form in which its teachings 
are imparted is novel, and may appear to many 
strange. But a word of explanation from the 
author may suffice to the fair-minded reader. 

Ascetic works we have in superabundance ; but 
these would not reach the class of readers for 
whom these chapters are destined, nor would they 
be taken up and perused in the hours which 
might be given to a work which is not professedly 
one of devotion. Perhaps, too, there may be 
found in the following pages instructions which 
will prove more attractive and profitable to its 
readers than the more arid lessons of the ascetic 
or the didactic writer. 



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X PREFACE* 

The chief object which the author had in view 
in undertaking to write this book was to help, so 
far as his abilities permitted, in withstanding the 
spread of the prevailing naturalism, which is daily- 
invading more and more our homes, the minds 
and lives of parents as well as of children. 

If we can preserve the Home from its influence, 
by making of every mother a supernatural woman, 
living a life of faith, loving above all things self- 
denial and self-sacrifice, fondly attached to the 
heroic ways and virtues of our ancestors, the 
Home, in our midst, will bring forth supernatural 
men and women, unselfish, pure, truth-loving, 
trustworthy, and devoted to the best interests of 
country and religion. 

What is attempted here may encourage others 
to pursue the same theme with far better pros- 
pects of success. This holy emulation would in 
itself reward the labour bestowed on this book ; 
and who knows but, imperfect as it is, it may 
bring happiness to more than one hearth, light to 
more than one mind, and nobler aims to more 
than one life hitherto wasted ? It is not only the 
^ fruits which autumn pours into our homes 



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PREFACE. Xi 

that are treasured by young and old alike; the 
very last withered leaves which the storms of the 
dreary November weather whirl along the road- 
side, or through the forest wastes, may serve as a 
welcome couch to the benighted wayfarer or the 
homeless outcast. 

And, dear reader, do not quarrel with the 
writer's method, A book written for pleasant 
recreation, as well as for solid instruction, cannot 
be like the broad surface of a royal river over 
which the largest and the smallest craft can move 
together without hindrance or interruption. Our 
path, in these chapters, lies along a shallow stream, 
amid sylvan scenery : we can rest in the noonday 
heat beneath the shadow of some wooded, over- 
hanging crag, stretching our limbs on the green 
sward, inhaling the fragrant air, and soothed by 
the noisy river beneath as it frets and foams 
among the rocks, discoursing the while on the 
Home we have left, and on the busy world towards 
which we are journeying. Or, as we wend our 
way later along shady banks where the stream 
glides, noiseless and unruffled, as if it also reposed 
after a toilsome passage, we can discuss together 



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Xli PREFACE. 

the difficulties of life's road, examine the grounds 
of our hopes and our fears, propose in turn our 
ideals and aims ; and thus beguiling the length 
of the way, forget the sultry weather, and the 
flight of time, till, with the declining sun, we 
descry afar the streamlet joining the broad river, 
where the river itself skirts the vast and crowded 
city, and mingles with the golden expanse of the 
vast ocean beyond. 

Enjoy the shady and restful nooks you will 
find as you proceed from chapter to chapter ; 
open your eyes to the prospects they here and 
there afford ; and if they prompt you, in looking 
on the pleasant earth around, or in gazing up into 
the blue heavens overhead, in picking up the 
simple flower that springs by the wayside, or 
listening to the sweet songsters of thicket and 
grove, to bless the Great Giver of all that is good 
and beautiful, you will be grateful to your guide 
ere your journey's end. 



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CONTENTS. 



CHAPTER I. 
The True Woman's Kingdom : the Home, 



PAGE 

Sacredness of the family home . . .2 

Woman '8 love, its light and waimth . . 4 

Supernatural virtues in the Christian home . 5 

A living faith . . . . .5 
How Christian mothers can imitate the Blessed Virgin 

Mary . . . . .8 

Piety. Purity of intention . . .10 

Illustrated from home life of the early Christians • 11 

CHAPTER II. 

The Home Virtues — (continued). 

Hospitality . . . . .17 

Holiness . . . . .19 

Innocence of conversation . . .21 

What the home ought not to be . . 21 

CHAPTER III. 

How the Home can be made a Paradise* 

How the poor man's home is made delightful . 23 

Unselfishness in the wife . . .24 

Make your home bright and sunny . . 25 

Dark and cheerless homes created by selfishness • 27 

Sad consequences of this in labourers' homes . 28 

Consequences in a wealthy home . . .29 

CHAPTER IV. 

Further Illustrations of Selfishivess and Unseljisliness. 

The example of St. Elzcar and his wife, St. Delphinc . 34 

St. John Colouibino converted by his patient wife . 35 



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xiv CONTENTS. 

PAGE 

Example of an angelic girl: What she did for her 

father and brother , 36 

CHAPTER V. 

The Wife in tlie Christian Home. 

The Christian home a sanctuary blessed by the Church 47 

Guarded by angels . . . .49 

"Woman's duties as wife . . . .50 

To be her husband's companion • . .50 

To be her husband's helpmate . . .54 

Help in the wealthy home . . .55 

Help in the labourer's home . . .55 

To be her husband's friend and saviour . . 57 

CHAPTER VI. 

The Wife as the Treasurer of the Home. 

Man's province to provide for the home : Woman's to 

dispense the treasures of the home • • 01 

Economy of time ; Order, comfort, loveliness . 62 

Stewardship of the wealthy wife • • .63 

Two extremes to be avoided • • .66 

She dispenses hospitality • • .67 

An American wife ; an ideal home » 69 

The wife as the friend of the poor • .73 

Spirit of charity in Catholic countries • . 74 

The lofty ideal of Catholic Spain . . .76 

That of Catholic Germany — St. Elizabeth of Hungary 78 
Habitual practice of reverence recommended in the 

home, and towards the poor . . .81 

Beautiful example of a French peasant girl • • 81 

Of French-Canadian women in 1847 . • 84 

Crowning instance : the ship-carpenter's wife . 86 

CHAPTER VII. 
The Wife's Crovming Duty: Fidelity. 
Solicitude of the Church for the honour of the home . 91 
Conjugal fidelity illustrated . . .95 

Rebecca . . • 97 



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CONTENTS. XV 
PAGE 

Judith ; . . . ,97 

Anna, the Prophetess . . . .98 

Fidelity to the living intended here . • 99 

Rules : Reserve and secrecy . . ' . 100 

Friendships that are baneful • . .101 

Remedies in danger and trial • . . 102 
Imperative necessity of supernatural virtue to women 

sorely tried . . . . .104 

Example of fidelity : The child- wife . . 106 

Vanity, the path to dishonour • . .112 

The home-pleasures which are a safeguard . .113 

Honour the tree of life in the home paradise . .115 

CHAPTER VIII. 

The Mother. 

Supernatural methods of the true mother . .118 

Share of the Divine Spirit in the work of education . 123 

Other qualities in the mother's government . .127 

Consistency. Perfect truthfulness ; .128 

Happy effects of early habits of truthfulness . 129 

Justice — kindness— gentleness • . .130 

Self-control . . . .132 

Never correct in a passion . • ,134 

Win the hearts of your children • . . 135 

Importance of this • 136 

CHAPTER IX. 
The Mother's Office towards Childhood. 

What a child is in the sight of God . . .140 

The soul of childhood . . . .142 

The mind of childhood . . . .144 

How it is to be cultivated : a beautiful example . 145 

Joyousness and love of enjoyment . • • 149 

How nature is to be made lovely to the child . .151 

Make the child see everywhere God and his angels . 152 

Never, at any moment, repel your children . .153 

Faith and trust in a mother's love are the breath of life 

for her children .... 153 

The mother is the keeper of her children's hearts • 155 



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Xvi CONTENTS. 

PAGH 

How a solid religions character is built up # 156 

Be invariably cheerful • • 157 

Be pitiless towards unchari tableness . • 159 

CHAPTER X. 

The Mother's Office towards Boyhood and Girlhood. 

The boys and girls in the labourer's home • .164 

Courage and generosity of labouring women . • 165 

llow firmly they can count on Christ's assistance . 166 

Other treasures found in such homes . . 169 

Their children to be taught the dignity of labour . 171 

To be kept joyous • » 171 

To be stimulated by praise . . .171 
Their mother should be gentle, low- voiced, and patient 172 

What kind of independence they are to be given . 174 

Extreme care in choosing companions for them • 176 

CHAPTER XI. 

Formation of Boyhood and Girlhood — (continued). 

Simplicity in dress and sobriety in food • • 179 

Sense of duty to be inculcated very early . . 181 

And sedulously cultivated • . • 182 

Cultivate the hearts of your children . . 183 

Children are not born but made heartless . . 186 

Heartlessness is but full-blown selfishness . • 188 

Examples of heartlessness : a heartless girl . . 188 

A heartless wife and husband . . , 191 

CHAPTER XII. 

Culture of the Heart — (continued). 

The rich treasures and mighty moral forces undeveloped 

in the heart of youth .... 200 
Even in the hearts of the poor . . . 201 

Instance : Madame Barat, Foundress of the Ladies of the 

Sacred Heart . . . .202 

Education a creation .... 205 
Create in tho heart of childhood and boyhood generosity 

in conquering self .... 208 



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00NTBNT8. Xvii 

PAGE 

Generosity in the exercise of the home-charities . 210 

Eeverence and devotion towards sick parents and others 213 
Forbearance towards the aged and infirm . .214 
Generosity in forgetting one's aches to please others . 215 
A beautiful instance of it . . . .216 

Generosity in practising the out-door charities . 219 

A patriarchal family and its charities , . 220 

Make not the bread of hospitality bitter • . 222 



CHAPTER XIII. 

Special Training for Girls and Boys, 
I. 

What is special in the training of girls , 

Simplicity in dress . . • 

Suitability in dress not extravagance 

Passion for dress and passion for bght reading 

"What girls should read 

Special religious topics : Modern errors 

What girls should not read . 

leach them the value of time • 

Minutes the golden sands of time • 

" Odd moments " and their use 

Practice'of devotion : Careful choice of them 

Their significance to be carefully explained . 

The mother's guidance with respect to matrimony 

With respect to vocations to religious life 

II. 



Special care needed in educating boys . . 251 
Ground them in true piety — the foundation of true man- 
liness . . . . .252 

It is the ideal of true manhood • . . 254 

Its characteristics : The oath and rules of chivalry . 257 

Fearlessness in the cause of Truth : St. Columbanus . 259 
"Be the Soldier of Truth! No Struggle, no Crown ! No 

Liberty, no Honour or Dignity 1 " . . 260 

Teach your sons to be their Bisters' willing servants . 261 

Home-bred courtesy — its necessity and value . 203 

Noble courtesy of Catholic country-folk . 263 



. 224 

. 228 

. 231 

. 233 

. 233 

. 235 

. 237 

. 239 

. 242 

. 244 

. 245 

. 246 

. 248 

. 250 



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CONTENTS. 



PAGB 

In Portugal # . . ; .263 

In Spain ..... 265 

Do not allow your daughters to make themselves their 

brothers' servants .... 266 
Let your home be the centre of amusement for your 

sons ..... 268 

Be their constant companion in their outdoor amuse- 
ments ..... 269 
What a divine work the education of a single child is . 270 
One easy to the poor mother • . .271 

And easy to the wealthy mother . . . 272 

Let your sons be God-fearing and self-reliant . 273 

The profession of truth ; and truth in our actions • 275 

CHAPTER XIV. 
Duties towards Parents and Servants. 
I. 

The ancient patriarchal authority still a living institu- 



tion . . . . 277 

Filial piety the religion of sweetest gratitude . 279 

Kindness to parents-in-law . • • 282 

A heroic example .... 283 

II. 

The Christian idea of service • . . 289 

Win your servants' hearts . . . 291 

The Catholic Golden Rule : Do them all the good you 

can, and make them as good as you can . 293 

Care of servants' souls in Catholic countries . 295 

" If you would be loved, love " . . . 297 

The tie of household charity loosened in modern society 298 

Unite a motherly interest with reserve . . 300 

Encourage them to consult you and trust in you • 301 

Do not judge them hastily . . • 302 

Try to make them comfortable, to refine and elevate 

them . . . . .302 

Do not overburden them with work • . 303 

In sickness care for them tenderly . . • 304 



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CONTENTS. 



xix 



PAG* 

Praise them generously, but justly • • # 306 

How servants repay kindness . • . 507 

CHAPTER XV. 

Obstacles to the Right Government of the Home. 

The ideal home, which united hearts and wills create . 308 

Make your home an hereditary home • .311 

Obstacles to the wife's good government • .313 

In the wealthy home . . . .315 
In the poor home .... 320 

CHAPTER XVI. 

The Mistress of the Borne, and her Social Duties. 

Twofold meaning of the word *' Society" • . 822 
The "Woman of the World" and the "Worldly 

Woman" . . . .324 

Need of true Christian women in the world . • 327 

Importance^ their social duties . • . 328 

Good effected by such women in Europe . . 330 

Charity and religion promoted by social gatherings . 331 

Work of the woman of the world outside of her home . 334 

Part of the working-man's wife • . . 335 

How the good work together . . . 336 

CHAPTER XVII. 
Maidenhood. 

Girlhood of the Virgin Mother, its model . . 340 

Her public life, a guide for the trials of womanhood . 341 

Girls reared in affluence and forced to labour . . 343 

Superior virtue developed in adversity : Instances . 343 

Lady companions : their hard lot • . . 347 

Guidance for them . . • .348 

An ideal example of their influence • • 350 

Bules for the direction of governesses • • 360 
School-teachers : they must be guided by the same 

rules . . . . . 3C9 



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CONTENTS. 



PAGE 

Thorough training needed : Normal schools in England 370 
Not to be satisfied with a low standard of excellence . 370 



Should be well remunerated . . . 372 

Special advice to teachers . . . . 372 

CHAPTER XVIII. 

The Toiler 8 of the Shop and the Loom. 

The divine comforts of poverty and toil . . 375 

Toilers in the shop : Their abject servitude . . 376 

Hard lot of dressmakers .... 379 

Advice to dressmakers and saleswomen . . 379 

Woman in manufactures . . . .381 

The brilliant side of modern industry . . 382 

Its hideous side .... 383 

Godless and conscienceless industry a foul plague-spot 385 

The Ancient Church the helper of women . . 386 

Appeal against heartless industry . . . 387 

It cuts down the tree to gather the fruit . . 388 

It destroys the child, the woman, and the home . 389 

A European statesman on factory women . . 389 

Remedial measures from religion . . . 393 

CHAPTER XIX. 

Supplementary • • . • » 401 



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THE MIRROR 

OF 

TEUE WOMANHOOD. 



CHAPTEE I. 

THE TRUE WOMAN'S KINGDOM — THE HOME. 

"Who is not struck with beholding your lively faith, your piety fall of 
sweetness and modesty, your generous hospitality, the holiness which 
reigns within your families, the serenity and innocence of your conversa- 
tion!" — St. Clkmbnt, Pope and Martyr, First Epittle to tht Corinthian*. 

"We are about to describe the sacred sphere within 
which God has appointed that true women should 
exercise their sway, that most blessed kingdom which 
it is in their power to create, and over which the 
Author of every most perfect gift will enable them to 
reign with an influence as undisputed as it may be 
boundless for all good. The home of the Christian 
family, such as the Creator wills it to be, and such 
as every true woman can make it, is not only the 
home of the wealthy and the powerful, but more 
especially still that of the poor and the lowly ; for 
these constitute the immense majority of mankind, 
and must ever be the chief object of his care, who 
is Father and Lord over all. From Him spring the 
laws which regulate all the sweet duties of family 
life, and the graces which enable the members of a 
household to make of their abode a paradise. 
2 

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2 THE 1ORE0B OF TBUB WOMANHOOD. 



Hence it is, that when the Author of our nature 
deigned to become man, and to subject Himself to 
these same laws and duties, He chose not a palace 
for his abode, nor a life of wealthy ease while upon 
earth, but the poor home of an artisan, and the life 
of toil and hardship which is the lot of the multitude. 
It was a most blissful design, worthy of the infinite 
wisdom and goodness. The human parents He chose 
were of royal blood, that the highest on earth might 
learn from Joseph and Mary how holiness can exalt 
princes to nearness to God, and how the most spotless 
purity can be the parent of a regenerated world. 
And He made all his human virtues bloom in the 
carpenter's home at Nazareth, in order that the 
poorest labourer might know that there is not one 
sweet virtue practised by the God-Man, J esus, which 
the last and hardest driven of the sons and daughters 
of toil may not cultivate in their own homes, though 
never so poor, so naked, or so narrow. 

80, dear reader, standing on the shore of the calm 
and beautiful Lake of Galilee, near which our Lord 
was reared, let us see his humble home and his 
home-life reflected therein, as in a most beautiful 
mirror; and with that divine image compare our 
own home, and the life with which we study to 
adorn it. 

There is nothing here below more sacred in the 
eyes of that good God who governs all things, and 
will judge all men in due time, than 

THE FAMILY HOME. 

All the institutions and ordinances which God has 
created in civil society or bestowed upon his Church, 



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THE FAMILY HOME. 



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have for their main purpose to secure the existence, 
the honour, and the happiness of every home in the 
community, from that of the sovereign or supreme 
magistrate to that of the most obscure individual who 
labours to rear a family. There is nothing on earth 
which the Creator and Lord of all things holds more 
dear than this home, in which a father's ever watch- 
ful care, untiring labour, and enlightened love, aim 
at creating for his children a little Eden in which 
they may grow up to the true perfection of children 
of God; in which a mother's unfailing and all- 
embracing tenderness will be, like the light and 
warmth of the sun in the heavens, the source of life, 
and joy, and strength, and all goodness to her dear 
ones, as well as to all who come within the reach of 
hex influence. 

The most learned men of modern times agree in 
saying that the sun's light and warmth are, in the 
order established by the Creator, the sources of all 
vegetable and animal life on the surface of our globe. 
They regulate the succession of seasons, the growth 
of all the wonderful varieties of tree and shrub and 
flower and grass that make of the surface of the 
earth an image of paradise. They give health and 
vigour to the myriads of animals of every kind that 
live in the air or in the waters or on the dry land, 
and to which, in turn, the vegetable world furnishes 
food and sustenance. The very motion given to the 
rain in falling, to the rivers in their course, to the 
oceans and their currents, comes from that sun-force, 
as well as the clouds which sail above our heads in 
the firmament and the lovely colours that paint them. 
Nay, there is not a single beauty in the million- 
million shades which embellish the flowers of grove, 



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THB MIRBOB OF TBTJB WOMANHOOD. 



or garden, or field, or clothe, at dawn, or noontide, or 
sunset, the face of earth and heaven, which is not a 
creation of glorious light, the visible image of his 
divine countenance, in whom is the source of all 
splendour, and life, and beauty* 

Even so, 0 woman, within that world which is your 
home and kingdom, your face is to light up and 
brighten and beautify all things, and your heart is 
to be the source of that vital fire and strength without 
which the father can be no true father, the brother 
no true brother, the sister no true sister, since all 
have to learn from you how to love, how to labour 
lovingly, how to be forgetful of self, and mindful 
only of the welfare of others. 

The natural affection by which the Creator of our 
souls draws to each other husband and wife, and 
which, in turn, they pour out on their children and 
receive back from these in filial regard and reverence, 
is the very source of domestic happiness. We 
cannot estimate too highly this holy mutual love 
which knits together the hearts of parents and 
children. It is as necessary to the peace, the comfort, 
the prosperity, and the bliss of every home, as the 
dew and the rain and the streams of running water 
are necessary to the husbandman for the fertility of 
the land he cultivates, and the growth of the harvest 
on which depend both his subsistence and his wealth. 

Let the dew and rain of heaven cease to fall on the 
fairest valley, let the springs of living water be dried 
up all over its bosom, and the rivers which brighten 
and fertilise it cease to flow but for a few seasons, 
and it will be like the vale of death, forsaken of every 
living thing. 

Do you wish, 0 reader, to learn how the springs 



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of true life, of true love and joy, may flow, unfailing 
and eternal, within the little paradise of your home ? 
Then weigh well the words of the great Martyr-Pope 
placed at the head of this chapter. These point out 
the virtues and qualities which should adorn every 
household in which Christ is worshipped : — a lively 
faith, a piety full of sweetness and modesty, a 
generous hospitality, holiness of life, serenity and 
innocence of conversation. Let us examine together 
how much there is in every one of these. We need 
not send to a great distance for one of those men 
famed for their skill in discovering hidden and plenti- 
ful springs of water beneath the surface of the ground. 
Their mysterious knowledge and the use of their 
magic wand are useless here; for here we have 
seven pure and exhaustless wells of living water 
created for our home by the Maker of all things, and 
placed ready to our hand for every need. 

And, first of all, is a lively faith. We Christians are 
given that eye of the soul which enables us to see 
the invisible world, as if the veil which hides it were 
withdrawn. God becomes to us an ever-present, 
most sweet, and most comforting reality. The great 
patriarch, Abraham, was bidden, in his long exile, 
and as a sure means of bearing up against his mani- 
fold trials, to walk before God — that is, to have God 
ever present before the eye of his soul. This sense of 
the Divine Majesty as a vision always accompanying 
us in our every occupation, in labour as well as repose, 
just as the pillar of cloud went with the Israelites 
in their journey ings towards the Promised Land, 
gives wonderful light to us in our darkness and 
difficulties, cheers us marvellously in distress and 



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TllE MIIiROR 0* TRUE WOttAimOOD. 



adversity, lightens the hardest labour and the most 
intolerable burden, imparts a divine strength in the 
hour of temptation ; for what can we not undertake 
and accomplish, what enemy can we not resist and 
put to flight, when we feel that his eye is on us, that 
we have Him there face to face, that his arm is ever 
stretched out to support and shield us, and that all 
the love of his fatherly heart sweetens the bitterness 
of our struggle, and rewards our generosity of over- 
coming all for his sake ? 

Joseph and Mary at Nazareth were privileged 
above all human beings to behold that Wisdom which 
created the world living and labouring daily beneath 
their humble roof, and growing up into the successive 
perfection of holy infancy, boyhood, and manhood, 
while concealing his quality from the surrounding 
multitude, and revealing only to a few like themselves 
his Godhead and his mission. It is certain that He 
practised all the virtues and fulfilled all the duties of 
his age and station in the way best fitted to glorify 
his Father : He was enlightening the world, sanctify- 
ing Himself, and marking out the path of life as truly 
for every one of us, during these long and obscure 
years of his abode in Nazareth, as when his teach- 
ing and his miracles drew around Him all Galilee 
and Judea. 

And what an eloquent lesson was there, exemplify- 
ing that " life of faith " without which the existence 
of the Christian man or woman is barren of all super- 
natural merit ! Christ, in the helpless years of his 
infancy and boyhood, when his life was one of entire 
dependence and submission, glorified and pleased 
his lather by solely seeking his good-will and 



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THE FAMILY HOME. 



7 



pleasure in obeying those appointed his earthly 
parents, and in accomplishing the obscure duties of 
his age. This lesson Joseph and Mary were not 
slow to learn and to practise. They read, in the rapt 
charily with which their worshipped Charge offered 
to the Divine Majesty every day and hour and 
moment of these golden years of toil, this all-impor- 
tant law of life for the children of God : " That the 
value of what we do does not depend on the greatness 
or publicity of the work accomplished ; but on the 
spirit of love towards the Father with which it is 
undertaken and carried out; and that the pure 
purpose and offering of the heart is what God prizes 
above all else. 19 

It has been the constant belief and teaching of 
Christian ages that the lives of Joseph and Mary, 
consumed in the voluntary poverty, lowliness, and toil 
of their condition, were ennobled, elevated, sanctified, 
and made most precious before God by being, after 
the example of the Divine Model before them, 
devoted to God alone, and animated by the one sole 
thought and purpose of pleasing and glorifying Him 
by perfect conformity to his holy will. 

The Mother who ruled in this most blessed home 
beheld, in the Divine Babe confided to her, the 
Incarnate Son of God walking before her in the true 
way of holiness, and, like Him, she applied herself to 
set the Eternal Father constantly before her eyes, 
studying to make every thought and word and aim 
and action most pleasing to that Infinite Perfection. 

When Christ had begun his public life, when the 
home at Nazareth was broken up, and Mary had 
taken up her abode with her kinsfolk at Capharnaum, 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



the light of the Father's countenance, in which she 
had learned to live, accompanied her, and the grace 
of her Son's example continued to surround her like 
a living atmosphere. After the terrible scenes at 
Calvary, and the glories of the ascension, she brought 
with her to the home which St. John and his mother, 
Mary Salome, so lovingly offered her, the image of 
her Crucified Love, as the one great mirror in which 
she could behold the new heights of sanctity and 
self-sacrifice which she was called on to tread with 
Him. 

Since her day who was Mother of our Head, 
Mother of the Church which she laboured to beget 
and to form, and Mother of us all, since she quitted 
her home on earth for heaven, the image of the 
Crucified God has ever been the chief ornament, the 
principal light, and the great Book of Life in every 
true Christian home. 

Not one saintly mother among the millions who 
have trained sons and daughters, ay, and husbands 
and dependents, to be the true followers of Christ, 
his apostles and his martyrs, when need was, but 
always his faithful servants and imitators, who did 
not read in the ever open page of her crucifix how 
she might best lead a life of self-sacrifice, and best 
induce her dear ones to be " crucified to the world." 

But let no one fancy that, in placing before her 
this holy model-home of the ever-blessed Mother of 
God, it is the intention of the writer to urge anyone 
who chances to read these pages to expect to equal in 
self-sacrifice either herself or her Divine Son. No ; 
the aim of the instruction here given is to encourage 
all who look into this mirror to adorn their homes 



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THE FAMILY HOME. 



9 



with some of the heavenly flowers which bloomed in 
Nazareth, to bring to the performance of their daily 
duties in their own appointed sphere, that lofty spirit 
of unselfish devotion to God which will make every- 
thing they do most precious in his sight, transform 
the poorest, narrowest, most cheerless home into a 
bright temple filled with the light of God's presence, 
blessed and protected by God's visiting angels, and 
fragrant with the odour of paradise. It is merely 
sought to open to the darkened eyes visions of a 
world which will enable the burdened soul to bear 
patiently and joyously the load of present ills, to fire 
the spirit of the careworn and the despairing with an 
energy which will enable them to take up the 
inevitable cross and follow Mary and her Son up to 
heights where rest is certain and the promised glory 
unfading. 

No ; you shall not be asked to quit your home, or 
exchange your occupations, or add one single particle 
to the burden of your toil, your care, or your suffer- 
ing ; but she, who is the dear Mother of us all, wil 1 
teach you, by the silent voice of her example, how to 
bring the light of heaven down into your home, the 
generosity of the children of God into the discharge 
of your every occupation, and the sweet spirit of 
Christ to ennoble your toil, to brighten your care and 
your suffering. 

Travellers among the loftiest mountains often 
chance upon calm bright lakes, within whose crystal 
depths are mirrored net only the blue heavens into 
which the eagle alone can soar, and the cold, ice- 
covered summits which only the feet of the most 
daring few have trodden, but the low and fertile hills 



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10 THE MIRROR OP TEXTS WOMANHOOD. 

around the shore covered with the green woods, the 
healthful pastures, and frequented by the shepherds 
and their flocks. It is to these lovely, safe, and 
accessible heights of virtue that this little book would 
guide the footsteps of mother and maiden alike. 

And of such easy access is the height of purity 
of intention and living faith which should be the 
constant light of your home. It is characteristic of 
the depth and constancy of womanly affection that 
the thought of the loved one, during the longest and 
most painful absence, will suffice to sustain them and 
to brighten a life which otherwise would appear 
cheerless. Thus it is said of that truest of wives, 

8T. ELIZABETH OF HUNGARY, 

that during her young husband's long spells of 
absence, at court or in the wars, she was wont to 
animate herself and her large household by the 
thought of how much he would be pleased, on his 
return, that they had endeavoured to do everything 
as they knew he would wish them. Elizabeth, before 
her marriage, had received from him, in a moment 
of bitter trial to her, a small pocket-mirror, which 
gentlemen in those days usually carried with them. 
It was of polished silver, with the reverse adorned 
with a crucifix set in gems. She never parted with 
this dear pledge of his truth, often taking it out of 
her satchel to kiss it. During her cruel widowhood, 
and when driven ruthlessly forth from her palace 
with her helpless orphans, she would continual^ 
hold this mirror in her hand, kissing the image of 
her crucified Lord, and recommending unceasingly 



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The family hoiib. 



11 



to Ids mercy the soul of her husband. Nor was 
this perpetual remembrance of him a source of 
prayerful resignation only : it also stirred her up to 
vindicate the rights of his plundered children. As 
she pleaded their cause before the Thuringian nobles, 
she would hold the well-known mirror in her hand, 
kiss it frequently, and press it to her heart, as if to 
warm herself to greater energy and eloquence. Nor 
were her nobles insensible to their young mistress's 
fidelity and truth to her earthly love. 

In like manner, if the thought of God and the 
remembrance of his incomparable love have any 
influence on our lives, they will be the soul of all our 
actions, inspiring, directing, cheering, and sustaining 
us in all that we plan and undertake and suffer day 
after day. 

St. Clement next praises, in the Corinthians, a 
" piety full of sweetness and modesty. " Piety is a 
word of Latin origin, and, among the old Romans 
who first used it, meant that spirit of dutiful and 
generous love with which children do the will and 
seek the interests of their parents. This sense of 
free, generous, disinterested, and unselfish devotion 
to the happiness, honour, and interests of one's 
parents, is always contrasted with the selfish, 
mercenary, or compulsory service of a slave or a 
servant in a family. True-hearted children make 
their happiness to consist in seeking how they can 
best please and honour father and mother : what 
they do is not dictated by the fear of punishment, or 
the hope of reward, or the prospect of gain or self- 
gratification. The hope or certainty of delighting or 
pleasing or helping the dear authors of their being, 



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THE MIRBOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



such is the thought which prompts the labours or 
obedience of a loving child. 

Not so the mercenary : his motive is to gain his 
wages. He bargains to do so much in return for 
such a wage. The happiness of the family, the 
interest or honour of his employers, their satisfaction, 
or the praise which they may bestow, do not, most 
likely, enter into the thoughts or calculations of 
venal souls. 

You have known, perhaps, in many families, 
daughters so noble-minded, that they were content to 
labour untiringly for their parents, placing their 
whole delight in doing all they could to lighten the 
burden of father and mother, or to make the home 
bright and pleasant for brothers and sisters, without 
seeking or expecting one word of praise or acknow- 
ledgment. This is the best description of filial 
piety. 

Only transfer to God's service that same unselfish 
and generous disposition, asking yourself only how 
much you can do to please Him, to glorify Him, to 
make yourself worthy of Him, to make Him known 
and have Him loved and served by others, and you 
have an idea what piety towards God is. 

Thus faith gives to the soul that " purity of in- 
tention " which not only makes the thought of God 
habitual, but enables one to lift one's eye towards the 
Divine Majesty in everything that one does — in labour 
as well as in repose, in suffering as well as in enjoy- 
ment, at home and abroad, in company and conversa- 
tion, as well as in solitude and silence. It kindles 
in the heart that flame of love which makes one burn 
with the absorbing desire of pleasing Him supremely. 



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THE FAMILY HOME. 



18 



It is thus the foundation of piety, the motive power 
of every good work, just as fire is the generating 
force of steam, and steam itself is the mighty force 
-which annihilates distance on sea and land, and 
transforms all the industries of the modern world. 

The soul accustomed to keep God before her eyes 
in all her ways, cannot help being pious in the truest 
sense : nothing can prevent her from seeking in all 
that she does the divine pleasure, and of esteeming 
all that she can do and suffer too little for so great 
a majesty and such incomparable goodness. 

This piety, working ever beneath that all-seeing 
eye, must be both sweet and modest : sweet, in the 
calmness and gentleness with which everything is 
undertaken and accomplished ; modest, in that no 
seeking of self and no consciousness of evil can 
disturb or overcast the limpid purity of a soul which 
reflects only the light and serenity of heaven, and is 
divinely sheltered from every blast of earthly passion. 

When we remember who these early Christians 
were whose sweet and virginal piety was praised by 
St. Clement, we are filled with astonishment at the 
total and sudden transformation which the truth of 
the Gospel, the knowledge and imitation of Christ 
and his Virgin Mother, effected in the most ill-famed 
city of the pagan world, and the most abandoned 
population known to history. The very name of 
Corinth was odious to the ancient Romans of the 
true republican era ; and when she fell beneath the 
Roman arms, she was utterly blotted out, lest the 
simplicity and austerity of the conquering race should 
become corrupt by contact with the voluptuous city. 
A Roman colony was afterwards planted there, and 



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THE MIRBOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



Corinth, arose once more from her ruins on that en- 
chanted shore, shorn, indeed, of her greatness and 
power, but scarcely less infamous than her former 
self. It was like the alkali plains of our western 
territories, where nothing seems able to grow but the 
sagebrush which saddens the eye/ No sooner had 
St. Paul preached there, practising all that he 
preached, than piety, purity, and modesty — all the 
gentle virtues of Mary's home at Nazareth — spread 
with the faith from house to house in Corinth, till 
the infant Church there resembled a society of angelic 
men and women. 

In soil deemed hitherto incapable of producing a 
single fruit of heavenly modesty the cross of Christ 
had been planted ; the curse of centuries was removed, 
and the land began to be fair with flowers of super- 
natural promise. What was the part of woman in 
this extraordinary renovation? Three women are 
mentioned in the New Testament as having been 
associated with the Apostles in the work of planting 
and fostering the Christian faith in the beautiful city 
and its dependencies— Prisca orPriscilla, Chloe, and 
Phebe, revered as saints from tho apostolic times by 
the churches of the East and West alike. It was in 
the house of Priscilla that St. Paul took up his abode 
when he first arrived at Corinth. Her husband > 
Aquila, was, like Paul himself, a tent-maker ; for it 
was the admirable custom, even of the highest and 
most wealthy J ewish families, to teach every one of 
their sons some trade or handicraft, which might 
place them above want, and thereby secure their 
independence when persecution or adverse fortune 
deprived them of country and riches. Aquila had 



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THE FAMILY HOME. 



15 



been expelled from Eome by the Emperor Claudius 
just before Paul's arrival on the Isthmus of Corinth, 
and was working at his craft of tent-maker, weaving 
for that purpose the hair of the Phrygian goat into 
a much esteemed and waterproof cloth. Their 
common craft was a first bond of intimacy between 
the great apostle and this household ; the Christian 
faith drew them still closer together. At any rate, 
though Priscilla and her husband opened their home 
and their hearts to the apostle and the divine message 
which he bore, we know from Paul himself that he 
would be beholden to no one for his support and that 
of his fellow-labourers in the Gospel. Still that 
laborious and well-ordered household became the 
cradle of Christianity in Western Greece, the first 
sanctuary in Corinth where the Divine Mysteries 
were celebrated, and the word of God explained to 
the highest and lowest among the proud, cultivated, 
and pleasure-loving population. Not unlike Priscilla 
was Chloe, in all probability also a married woman, 
while Phebe, the female apostle of Cenchrese, the 
eastern suburb and seaport of Corinth, was un- 
married, a deaconess, and the first fruits, on that 
long-polluted land, of the Virgin-Life destined to be 
so fruitful of holiness in Christian Europe. 

Priscilla and her husband followed Paul to 
Ephesus, in Asia, a city scarcely less ill-famed than 
Corinth, where the devoted and energetic wife shared 
the mortal dangers which beset the apostle, and in- 
structed in the Christian faith the accomplished and 
eloquent Apollos, who was sent to Corinth to continue 
there the good work so gloriously begun. When 
Paul was sent in chains to Rome, the noble woman 



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16 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMAimOOD. 

and her worthy husband forsook everything, risked 
even life itself to be near him, and to share his 
labours and perils. Priscilla's house in Rome became 
a church, a centre of Christian activity and charity, 
and Chloe and Phebe's names are associated with 
hers in the heartfelt commendations of the imprisoned 
apostle, and the undying gratitude ?nd veneration of 
every succeeding age. 

Most blessed, therefore, of God and man was the 
sweet and gentle piety, as well as the unbounded 
hospitality of these early Christian homes. But pass 
we not lightly over this great home-virtue of hospi- 
tality : this and the two other precious virtues 
mentioned by St. Clement we must reserve to the 
next chapter. 



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HOSPITALITY* 



17 



CHAPTEE II. 

THE HOME VIRTUES (CONTINUED) — HOSPITALITY, HOLI- 
NESS, AND INNOCENCE OF CONVERSATION. 

Let each one inquire in the Church for the poor and the stranger ; and 
when he meets them, let him invite them to his house ; for with the poor 
man Christ will enter it. He who entertains a stranger entertains Christ 
The glory of a Christian is to receive strangers and pilgrims, and to have at 
bis table the poor, the widow, and the orphan.— St. Ephbem, J)e Amort 
faupenm. 

HOSPITALITY. 

Thb Christian religion, besides inheriting all the 
divine legislation of preceding ages, and consecrating 
all that was ennobling and purifying in public and 
private life, perfected every virtue practised by J ew 
and Gentile by assigning to each a supernatural 
motive, and by assisting the weakness of nature with 
most powerful graces. 

Doubtless, in the most ancient times, men, wherever 
they chanced to live, were not altogether unmindful 
of their being sprung from the same parents, and the 
first impulse of nature urged them to open their 
house to the stranger as to a brother, one who was 
their own flesh and blood. In the patriarchal ages 
we find a higher motive superadded to that of common 
brotherhood: that to receive the stranger was to 
discharge a debt due to God Himself — that to shut 
him out was, possibly, to close one's door against the 

8 



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18 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



Deity in disguise. Abraham and his nephew Lot 
gave hospitality to angels disguised in human form, 
and were rewarded, the former by the birth of Isaac, 
the latter by being saved with his family from the 
terrible destruction in which Sodom and the neigh* 
bouring cities 'Were involved. 

Not dissimilar was the reward divinely granted to 
the poor pagan widow of Sarephta, who harboured 
and fed the famished and fugitive prophet Elias, and 
to the wealthy lady of Sunam, who sheltered Elisaeus. 
Their generous hospitality was rewarded by the re* 
storing to life of the only son of each. 

But in the Gospel, Martha and Mary made their 
home the resting-place of the Incarnate God, and 
their hospitality was accompanied by a public and 
unhesitating confession of their Guest's divinity, and 
that, too, at a time when He was most opposed and 
persecuted by the leading men of the nation. Not 
only were they also rewarded by the restoration to 
life of their dead brother, but they had the further 
recompense of becoming the apostles of the Divine 
Master. 

This was, moreover, the return made by Him to 
His Mother's cousin, Mary Salome, mother of St. 
James the Elder, and St. John the apostle, for the 
hospitality so generously bestowed on Mary after the 
breaking up of her own home at Nazareth. The 
same may be said of that other Mary, the sister of 
the apostle St. Barnabas, and the mother of another 
apostle, J ohn-Mark. It is the common tradition that 
her house was that in which our Lord celebrated the 
Last Supper, in which the Blessed Virgin found a 
rsfuge during the interval between the Crucifixion 



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HOLINESS. 



19 



and the Resurrection, and in which the apostles and 
disciples were wont to assemble till the Holy Ghost 
came down on them. 

Certain it is that there the faithful were wont to 
meet with Peter and the other apostles till after the 
martyrdom of St. Stephen and St. James, the im- 
prisonment and miraculous liberation of St. Peter, and 
the visit made to him by St. Paul after the latter's 
conversion. Her home was the common home of the 
infant church of Jerusalem, and, as tradition affirms, 
the first Christian church in that city. This generous 
mother's hospitality was rewarded by seeing both 
her brother and her son called to the glorious labours 
and perils of the apostleship. 

Thenceforward, the bestowing hospitality was for 
the mistress of a Christian household to receive 
Christ Himself, the God of Charity, in the person of 
every guest who crossed her threshold, be he rich or 
poor, kinsman or stranger, friend or foe, sick or 
loathsome, the holiest of men or the most abandoned 
of sinners. 

But we must reserve for another place the rules of 
hospitality to be observed by the mistress of the 
home and all her dependents. We are at present 
only pointing out the distinctive character and the 
ideal of Christian hospitality. 

HOLINESS. 

A holy house is one in which God is truly King; 
in which He reigns supreme over the minds and 
hearts of the inmates ; in which every word and act 
honours his name. One feels on entering such a 
house, nay, even on approaching it, that the very 



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20 THE MIRROE OF TBT7B WOMANHOOD. 



atmosphere within and without is laden withheavenly 
influences. Modern authors have written elegantly 
and eloquently about the home life which was the 
source of all domestic virtues and all public greatness 
in the powerful nations of antiquity. They describe, 
in every household, in the poor man's cabin as well 
as in the palace, that altar set apart for family wor- 
ship, on which the sacred fire was scrupulously 
watched and kept alive night and day. No one ever 
went forth from the house without first kneeling at 
that altar and paying reverence to the divinity of 
the place, and no one, on returning, ever saluted 
his dearest ones before doing homage there. There, 
too, at night the household met for prayer and 
adoration, and there again with the dawn they knelt 
together to beg, on the labours of the day before 
them, the blessing of the Deity worshipped by their 
fathers. 

This altar and this undying fire were regarded as 
a something so holy that only the most precious wood 
and the purest material was employed to feed the 
flame. Nothing filthy or defiled was permitted to 
approach the spot; and every indecent word uttered 
or act committed near it was deemed a sacrilege. 
This hearth-altar, or hearth-fire, as it was called, 
was symbolical of the fate of the family. If it was 
neglected and allowed to die out, this was deemed an 
irreparable calamity foreboding the ruin of the home, 
and the extinction of the race. 

In the Christian home it is the flame of piety, ardent 
love for God, and charity towards the neighbour, 
which constitutes the hearth-fire that should over 
burn bright. Old Catholic homes — how many of our 



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WHAT THE HOME OUGHT NOT TO* BE. 21 

readers will remember it? — were wont to have the 
cross placed outside as a symbol of the love for the 
Crucified which ruled all hearts within ; and in the 
interior his name, as well as his image, could be 
seen on almost every wall, informing the stranger- 
guest that he was in the house of the common 
Parent, and in the midst of dear brethren. 

And how many of us may also remember the poor 
but cleanly cottage of the labourer, or the narrow 
room of city families, on whose bare but white walls 
there was no ornament but the crucifix, and no glory 
but that of the Holy Name, written there as a seal 
of predestination ? 

Where the fire of divine love is fed as carefully, 
and the mother and her daughters watch as jealously 
as the Roman matrons and maidens of old that its 
flame shall never be extinguished, there is little fear 
that any conversation but what is " innocent " shall 
prevail. Purity and charity are the twin lights of 
every home deserving of God's best blessing and 
man's heartfelt veneration. 

WHAT THE HOME OUGHT NOT TO BE. 

The Spaniards say, " Shut the door and the devil 
passes by ; v the true woman who has read the pre- 
ceding pages, and understood the teaching conveyed 
therein, will know how to preserve her home-sanc- 
tuary ixom evil. It is, comparatively, an easy task 
to cultivate and cherish in one's own life, and in the 
souls of those nearest and dearest to one, all the 
sweet virtues and holy habits indicated above, or 
connected with true piety. But how hard it is, whec 



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22 



THE MIRROR OF TEXTS WOMANHOOD. 



onoe evil habits have been f ormed, to resist or fef orm 
them ! There are certain horrible skin diseases to 
which persons of the purest blood and most refined 
nature are most liable. And the terrible poison, 
sometimes caught by a breath, or a touch of the 
hand, once deposited in blood hitherto untainted, 
will spread instantaneously, and commit the most 
fearful ravages. 

So it is with souls highly privileged? a single 
voluntary act of sin may be followed by such a state 
of spiritual leprosy, that all their former beauty and 
glory appear changed into hideous deformity and 
seemingly incurable corruption. 

Be careful to keep evil far away from the hearts 
of your dear ones ; and close and bar the door of 
your home at all times when you know that wicked- 
ness is abroad in the street or on the highway. Keep 
out the fatal influences which might weaken or destroy 
the precious boon of Christian faith in your house- 
hold ; bar and bolt your door against uncharitableness, 
immodesty, and that odious spirit of irreverence 
towards age, authority, and all that our fathers have 
taught us to respect and love. 

And, oh, women who read this, learn here how to 
make your home, though never so poor and bare, 
lovely to your dear ones, and an object of respect 
and envy to all who know you. This you shall be 
taught in the next chapter. 



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THH F00BB8T HOMES HADE DELIGHTFUL* 23 



CHAPTEE m. 

HOW THE POOR HAN'S HOME CAN BE HADE RICH AND 
BRIGHT AND DELIGHTFUL BY A TRUE WOMAN'S 
INDUSTRY. 

As it was to a poor and lowly home that the Son of 
God came when He began the work of our redemp- 
tion, as it was in the home of a poor mother that He 
lived so contentedly during thirty years, so, ever since, 
his followers have looked upon the dwellings of the 
poor with inexpressible love and tenderness. Ah ! 
he is no true lover of Christ who is not drawn to the 
home of poverty and labour ; and the spirit of Christ 
dwells not in the heart whose sympathies do not go 
forth to the trials and distresses of those who are, 
above all others, the friends of Jesus Christ. 

But our concern is now with the wife, the daughter, 
the sister of the labouring man and the poor man ; 
we wish them to understand what royalty of spirit 
can and ought to be theirs, in order to be the true 
imitators and true children of that great Mother who 
knew how to make the poor home of Joseph so rich, 
so bright, so blissful, so lovely in the eyes of men 
and angels. 

She, too, was of right royal blood who was the 
mistress of that little home where Joseph toiled, and 
the Divine Child grew up in all grace and sweetness, 



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24 THB MIRROR OF TRUE WOMAHHOOD. 



like the lily of the valley on its humble stem beneath 
the shadow of the sheltering oak. 

Woman's entire existence, in order to be a source 
of happiness to others as well as to herself, must be 
one of self-sacrifice. The first step in this royal 
pathway to all goodness and greatness is to forget 
self. Self, with its miserable little cares and affec- 
tions, is the root of all the wretchedness we cause to 
others, and all the misery we endure ourselves. 
Every effort we make to forget self, to leave self 
behind us, and to devote ourselves to the labour of 
making every person with whom we are bound to 
live happy, is rewarded by interior satisfaction and 
joy. The supreme effort of goodness is, not alone to 
do good to others — that is its first and lower effect — 
but to make others good. So with unselfishness: 
the first step is to forget one's own comfort, in order 
to seek that of others ; the next is to forget one's 
own pains and suffering, in order to alleviate those of 
others, or even to discharge towards others the duties 
of sisterly or neighbourly kindness. 

What every Christian country needs most are these 
great-souled wives, mothers, and sisters in the 
dwellings of our over-burdened labourers ; women 
for whom the roof above them and the four walls 
which enclose their dear ones are the only world they 
care to know, the little paradise which they set their 
hearts on making pleasant, sunny, and fragrant for 
the husband who is out in the hot sun or the bitter 
cold, beneath the pelting of the rain or the snow or 
the sleet ; who, poorly clad and shod, with his scanty 
fare of hard bread, and cold tea, is working away for 
the little home and the wife and babes, and who is 



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THE POOREST HOMES MADE DELIGHTFUL. 25 

singing in his heart as he bethinks him of the warm 
welcome that awaits him when the long day is over ; 
of the bright smile and the loving words that will be 
sure to greet him when he crosses the threshold of 
his own little Eden ; of the cheerful fire in winter, 
and the humble meal made so delicious by the love 
that prepares it, and the sweet words that season it ; 
of the rest and security and the peace which force the 
overflowing heart of the husband and father and 
brother to think and to say that there is no spot of 
earth so dear and so blessed as the little sanctuary 
built up and adorned and made full of song by a true 
woman's heart. 

O woman, woman ! if you only knew how much 
you have it in your power to do — with His assistance 
who can never fail us when we do our best — to make 
true men of the husband of your choice, of the sons 
whom God has given you as his most precious 
trjasures ; true women, in their turn, of the little 
girls who are growing up at your knee — to be, when 
you are gone to your reward, mothers blessed and 
praised by all who know them. 

We have just spoken of the divine assistance, 
which never fails the soul striving earnestly to fulfil 
important duties and to do all the good she can. 
Think of the contract God entered into with you 
when you entered into the married state and received 
at the hands of the Church the nuptial blessing. 
You were told that the matrimonial union had its 
model in the union of Christ with his Church, that 
his great love for her, which brought Him to the 
cross, and binds Him to be present on our altars to 
the end of time, is the type of the great and self- 



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26 



THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



devoting love which husband and wife should ever 
have for each other. Did you ever reflect that when 
you put your hand in your husband's hand before 
the Church, giving him your heart and your life 
thenceforward, that God, who is ever by the side of 
those who believe and trust in Him, promised you a 
mighty wealth of grace to be all your own till death, 
enabling you to love your husband more and more 
daily, with a deeper and a holier love, to make your 
own life like that of the Church towards her Crucified 
Love, one perpetual act of devotion and self-sacrifice, 
giving him in his every need your own strong love to 
sustain, and comfort, and strengthen him, taking up 
his cross courageously, and cheering him to labour 
and to suffer, because you both know, or ought to 
know, that God is ever with you* 

Were your lot cast and your home built in a tree- 
less plain amid a dry and barren country, how you 
would thank the man who would dig for you at your 
very door a well so deep and so unfailing that its 
cool and sweet waters would ever flow forth, winter 
and summer, for yourself and your dear ones ! And 
yet the great graces attached by Christ to the worthy 
reception of the divine sacrament of matrimony, form 
within your home, wherever you chance to be, a well 
of water for the soul's health and strength so divinely 
prepared, that ho length of time can exhaust it. 
Why do you not drink of the waters of your own well ? 

We have just said how much the true woman has 
it in her power to do — no matter how poor her home 
or hard her husband's lot — if she only knew both the 
extent of her power to cheer his lot and the sacred- 
ness of the obligation which binds her to do it. 



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DARK AND CHEERLESS HOICKS. 



27 



"We now appeal to the experience and generosity 
of the wife, mother, and sister of the labouring man. 
There was a rapid sketch above of the comforts and 
delights of the poor hard-working man's home, when 
love and devotion were toiling to prepare a sweet 
rest for him when the day's work was ended. 

DARK AND CHEERLESS HOMES. 

But have we seriously thought of the number of 
homes made dark, and cheerless, and desolate, and 
hateful to the husband, the brother, the son, and the 
daughter, too, by the absence of that bright spirit of 
love, which works at home from dawn till sunset, to 
have everything Warm and pleasant and restful for 
the weary ones coming back after their eight and 
ten hours of labour ? 

If the devoted, God-fearing, sweet-tempered woman 
is rewarded by seeing her dear ones unhappy when 
kept away from the bright home she makes for them, 
and most happy when seated near the warm hearth 
and charmed with her smile and her voice, it is no 
less certain that the selfish, untidy, ill-tempered, 
and bitter-tongued woman succeeds in making home 
unbearable for everyone who is dependent on her. 

"Why is it that so many men — thrifty, hard-work- 
ing, made to be and disposed to be devoted husband? 
and exemplary fathers — are driven at the end of their 
day of toil to find — not rest, indeed, nor recreation — 
in the neighbour's house — but some distraction from 
the thought of their own comfortless home, some rest 
from the din and lash of the ceaseless tongue which 
is their torment? Why are so many, at length, 
driven to the tavern to seek forgetfulness in intoxi- 



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28 



THE 1OBE0B OP TEUB WOMANHOOD. 



cation? Is it not because woman forgets to be 
loving and devoted and ingenious in the sweet arts of 
making her fire burn brighter on the hearth, and 
her own person more attractive to her dear ones by 
some little ornament put on to welcome the labourers 
at evening, and her humble meal made more appe- 
tising by some of the many cheap seasonings that the 
poorest can buy, and her whole house shining with 
cleanliness, and filled with the sweet music of her 
own delighted tones? Ah! love has stores from 
which can be borrowed without stint, and at little 
cost, kind words and warm smiles and a thousand 
other things which go straight to the heart thirsting 
for the endearments, the joys, and the repose of 
home. Why will you not be a queen in your own 
little kingdom, 0 wife, 0 mother, 0 sister, and make 
all hearts subject to you by this ascendency of your 
goodness and devotion. 

There are worse consequences still — especially in 
cities and manufacturing towns — which are caused 
by the want of the wifely and motherly qualities 
described above. 

Young people of both sexes who are forced — 
perhaps from early boyhood or girlhood — to seek for 
employment outside of their home, feel an imperative 
need of the rest and comfort and love of their own 
fireside, when the end of their long day of toil has 
come. Blessed is the mother who knows how to 
make their home bright and warm for them! But 
what shall we say of her who cares not to do so ? or 
who makes her home intolerable to her dear ones ? 

This much is certain, that in our overcrowded 
cities, if not elsewhere, thousands upon thousands of 



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SPLENDID MI8EBT* 



29 



hard-working young people are driven into dangerous 
company and corrupting amusements because they 
have no home to love, to be proud of, in which to 
find the repose of heart and body so needful for their 
age especially. There is in this a mine of suggestion 
for parents, for pastors, as well as for all persons to 
whom Providence has given the means and the will 
to prevent the ruin of our youth. 

But far better than all explanations or disserta- 
tions may be the bright examples quoted in the next 
chapter. Before we come to these, however, let us 
complete the present subject matter by showing 

HOW THE 8ELFI8HNE8S AND FOLLY OF A FASHIONABLE 
WOMAN CAN MAKE THE MOST MAGNIFICENT HOME 
INTOLERABLE* 

We wish the reader to understand the term 
tl fashionable woman" in the odious or objectionable 
sense in which it is taken by the sound judgment of 
people of the world. With " fashions," in so far as 
they are unobjectionable, and mark the changes in 
dress to which even the best and least worldly 
persons in society, men as well as women, have to 
conform, we do not mean to find fault ; this would 
be foreign to our present purpose, and serve only to 
distract the reader unprofitably. It will be seen by 
a glance at what we have to say, that our censure 
addresses itself to an exceptional class of wealthy 
women whose number, unhappily, is increasing daily. 

The home of the wealthiest, we take it, no matter 
how splendid outwardly, or how magnificent and 
luxurious within, can be at best but splendid misery, 



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30 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD, 



where unselfish, and devoted love does not pfSside 
over the household, provide for the comfort of every 
person there, and minister to their happiness by the 
bright cheerfulness without which the most gorgeous 
furniture has no lustre, and the electric warmth of 
affection, without which courtly manners are but a 
lifeless show. 

Here is a man who has fought a hard battle with 
fortune, but has won it at last. Like true soldiers 
on every field, he has not cared, during his long 
struggle, for many comforts, luxury was beyond his 
reach. But now that fortune lavishes her favours on 
him he wishes to enjoy life in a home that shall be, 
he hopes, a paradise. Would that many of our most 
thrifty and fortunate men, though never so upright 
and honourable, would remember the old pagan 
superstition about exposing one's bliss to the eyes of 
the gods, or flaunting one's prosperity in the sun- 
light! The "loudest " wealth is never likely to 
yield unmixed or lasting felicity; this is better 
secured by quiet tastes, and the repose enjoyed in tho 
shade, and with the select few. 

But our fortunate man has built and furnished a 
home so comfortable that only a companion who can 
be devoted to him is wanting to complete it. He has 
been attracted by a handsome face, and a name with- 
out reproach. Perhaps, on his part, there has been 
none of that romantic feeling to which the superficial 
world gives the name of love ; but there is in his 
choice the hearty purpose of finding one who will 
love him truly, and to whose happiness he wishes to 
devote his fortune and himself. 

She is a woman, young, indeed, and stainless, but 



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SPLENDID MIflEBX* 



31 



selfish and Tain; fond of dress, of admiration, of 
display, and who is anxious to wed a fortune large 
enough to permit her to gratify all her frivolous 
tastes. Her husband had the ambition to succeed in 
business — that ambition is now gratified ; but he had 
other and nobler aims which he had to forego in the 
hard striving after wealth, and which now possess 
his soul. He would fain cultivate his mind, he would 
indulge his taste for such of the fine arts as make 
home beautiful, and home enjoyments more delight- 
ful. In the wife's family were several persons noted 
for their culture and scientific attainments : indeed, 
an accidental acquaintance with one of these had led 
to a first introduction to the woman whom he had 
made his bride, and in whom he hoped to find a 
perfect sympathy for the intellectual aspirations which 
served to brighten the future before him. 

But the literary tastes and scientific pursuits of her 
relatives had been this woman's aversion from girl- 
hood, and her husband was not slow in discovering 
that there was not one particle of intellectuality in 
her composition. Her honeymoon, instead of being 
spent in travelling, was taken up with an unbroken 
round of receptions and parties. Her powers of 
endurance, when the ball-room or the theatre were 
concerned, seemed to be unlimited ; but, once in her 
privacy, she seemed never to think that her husband 
wished to enjoy her companionship, or that she was 
expected to converse with him, to play or sing for 
him, or to make a single effort at being his companion 
for a single hour. The afternoons were spent in the 
park, when her equipage had to outshine the richest, 
and her toilet was made to eclipse the most fashion- 



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82 



THE MTOBOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



able. The evenings, for the most part, were oon. 
sumed in interminable sittings with her French maid, 
who decked her mistress out with incomparable art 
for the ball or the theatre. The bridegroom hatf 
hoped that this thirst for display and dissipation 
would be quenched by the unlimited indulgence of 
the first year of married life, and that, after this 
necessary infliction, he should have the quiet of his 
home and the sweet company of his young wife; 
besides, his health could not stand the serious dis- 
turbance caused in his regular habits by late hours, 
and this unnatural changing of day into night and 
night into day. 

The second and third years of his matrimonial life 
found him disappointed, dispirited, and utterly 
miserable, with the certainty, moreover, of having 
bound himself for life to a woman who never could 
be a companion to him, who had neither head nor 
heart, nothing, in fine, to recommend her but a pretty 
face, like a painted mask covering an empty skull. 

His beautiful home became intolerable to him, and 
there is no knowing what desperate or downward 
course the heart-broken man might have pursued 
if he had not been asked by one of his wife's relatives 
to accompany him on a scientific expedition. This 
offer kindled once more his purest ambition, and, 
after limiting, to a very generous amount, the 
monthly expenditure of his young wife, he was glad 
to escape from his home, and to seek knowledge and 
fame in the field of science. 

She, meanwhile, had but one purpose in life, to 
dress. At the death of a distinguished fellow-citizen 
she literally spent three whole days and nights 



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I PA88I0N FOB DHES8. 33 

visiting the most fashionable warehouses, and closeted 
with the most reputed milliners, to find out what 
style of hat and what dress she might wear at the 
funeral, so as to throw the whole of " Vanity Fair " 
into the shade. 

When the spring- tide of that heartless beauty had 
passed away, it was already autumn for her. The 
complexion which was her only charm had been early 
rained by the reckless and needless use of cosmetics, 
much more even than by her feverish life of enjoy- 
ment. No splendour of dress could conceal the fatal 
decay, and no depth of paint could mask it ; and 
with the consciousness of this premature decline, her 
fretf illness and peevishness made her intercourse in- 
tolerable, unrelieved, as its dulness was, by a single 
mental accomplishment, or a solitary conversational 
grace. 

The husband, on his return, sought relief from the 
dreariness of his home-life in the speculations of the 
stock-exchange, heeding little, if at all, the remon- 
strances of a wife he heartily despised. When last 
heard of, his name was mentioned as one of many 
ruined by some sudden fall in railroad stooks. His 
house and furniture passed out of his possession, and 
he was left alone with poverty, obscurity, and a wife 
Without head, or heart, or even beauty. 



4 



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84 THE MIRROR OF TBTJB WOMANHOOD. 



CHAPTER IV. 

HOW HUSBAND AND WIFE TOGETHER MAKE A 
HAPPY HOME. 

In one of the exquisite books written by a contem- 
porary author,* many examples and extracts are 
given, all tending to show how blissful is the condi- 
tion of every family in which the principles of the 
Catholic religion are sedulously practised by parents 
and children. In the house of Count St. Elzear, the 
son of a saint and the husband of another, the tutor 
of a king, the governor and saviour of his kingdom, 
the gentle knight, the great-souled statesman, and 
skilful general, who died at twenty-eight, the idol 
and model of two nations, we have the perfect mirror 
of domestic government. It is not easy to say 
whether his wife, St. Delphine, and her saintly hus- 
band are more to be admired for the supernatural 
virtues which shone in their lives, or for the practical 
common sense which dictated the rules they estab- 
lished over their household, and over their princely 
domains. 

But, though Elzear had been reared as a saint 
from infancy, and had scarcely emerged from boy- 

* We mean Kenelm Digby. We here borrow from his 
Compitum, or the "Meeting of the Ways at the Catholic 
Church," book i* t chapter iv. 



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THE WRATHFUL HUSBAND TBAKSFOBHXD. 35 

hood wiflsn they were affianced and married, Delphine, 
who was by two years his elder (though only fifteen), 
became thenceforward the guiding and controlling 
spirit. Although entrusted, at so unripe an age, with 
the government of large estates in France and the 
kingdom of Naples, and finding himself at the head 
of so numerous a household, it was| affirmed, by tho 
unanimous testimony of his servants, retainers, and 
subjects, that not a sign of ill- temper or impatience 
ever betrayed a disposition naturally passionate and 
fierce. 

His wife, who studied him so closely, wondered at 
this extraordinary mastery over self, and said to him 
one day : "What kind of a man are you, never to show 
anger or emotion when treated with insolence or 
seriously wronged ? . . . Are you incapable of 
feeling resentment ? What harm could it do to the 
wicked men who occasionally do you foul wrong, if 
you manifested a little indignation at their conduct V* 
"Why should I betray temper or give way to indig- 
nation, my dear Delphine ? " was the reply. " Anger 
never serves any good purpose ; nevertheless, I shall 
let you into a little secret of mine. Know, then, that 
often enough, when wronged in word or deed, I do 
feel my anger swell up within me ; but I never fail 
to recall how our dear Lord was treated in his 
Passion, and say to myself, ' Even if thy servants did 
buffet thee and pluck thy beard, how much more 
outrageously was He treated I ' " He died in 1 323. 

THE WRATHFUL HUSBAND TRANSFORMED BY PATIENCE. 

In 1355, lived at Siena, in Italy, a nobleman, 
Giovanni (John) Colombino, who was quito the 



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36 THE MIRROR OF TBTJE WOMANHOOD. 

opposite of St. Elzear, He was extremely irritable, 
and took no pains to master his temper. Coming 
home one day at his dinner hour, and finding that 
the meal was not ready, he flew into a furious passion, 
and began to upset and break the furniture in the 
dining-room. His wife, a holy woman, endeavoured 
to pacify him, and, while urging the servants to hurry 
forward their preparations, she argued sweetly with 
her husband on the unseemliness of such displays 
of anger, and begged him to read a book while 
she would go to aid the cook. He flung the 
book away from him, and stalked back and 
forth in his rage, while the lady hastened to the 
kitchen. 

Presently, however, he began to cool down and to 
feel heartily ashamed of his weakness ; so, picking 
up the book, he began to read. It was the " Lives of 
the Saints," and in the mirror of their conduct he be- 
held the horrible deformity of his own life. From 
that hour there was a total change in Giovanni 
Colombino : he became the wonder of Sienna, died in 
odour of sanctity, and added one more name to the 
long roll of Christian heroes who owed, under Pro- 
vidence, their greatness and heroism to the irresistible 
influence of a saintly woman. 

WHAT AN ANGELIO DAUGHTER AND SISTEB DID. 

In the year 186-, a family, composed of father and 
mother, with three children, came from afar to live 
in a quiet suburb of one of our great eastern cities. 
The father, Mr. S , had been the heir to a con- 
siderable fortune, which he had first impaired by 



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WHAT AN ANGELIC DAUGHTER DID. 3V 

mismanagement, and then completely lost by involv- 
ing it all in unwise ventures. He had been induced 
to come to the East by the offer of employment as 
bookkeeper or accountant in a large shipping firm. 
He took possession of his modest little suburban 
house under peculiarly distressing circumstances. 
His wife, a woman of uncommon beauty and good- 
ness, was in the last stage of consumption, and tho 
fatal termination of the malady was hastened by 
the fatigues of a long journey, the bitter cold of 
an unusually severe autumn, and the material dis- 
comforts of her new home. The cottage which the 
family had rented was old, damp, had been for some 
years untenanted, and was but scantily furnished, and 
insufficiently warmed. 

"I trust in you, Nora," gasped the dying mother, 
as she held the hand of the kneeling girl in one of her 
own, and with the other touched the bent golden 
head half in blessing and half caressingly, " and I 
know God will help you." The priest, who had just 
brought to that death-bed the Divine Pledge of the 
eternal possession, was standing near, deeply moved 
by all that he had seen of these interesting strangers. 
The simple enlightened faith and exalted piety of 
the mother, the angelic grace of the eldest daughter, 
and the helpless, hopeless expression of the poor 
father, as he supported the younger child — fragile, 
fair-haired, and dazzlingly beautiful, but with con- 
sumption written on her wan cheek and wasted form 
— all that went to his heart, and kept him there till 
the divine messenger — Death — had performed his 
errand. An only son, a lad of eighteen, apprenticed 
to a civil engineer, was absent, and could only reach 



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38 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

the house of mourning as they were about to set out 
for the church and the cemetery. 

When the priest, with moist eyes, summoned 
courage to say to the remaining parent and his off- 
spring that all was over, and that one more saintly 
soul had gone to her rest and reward, Nora, startled 
by an exclamation from her father, turned round to 
see her sister apparently lifeless in his arms. " Oh 
my darling, my darling ! " she said, as she raised the 
rigid form, and covered its face with her tears and 
kisses ; " you must not leave me now ! Oh ! Q-od 
will not take you from me ! . . 

The priest, with a few earnest words of sympathy 
in the father's ear, hastened away when the fainting 
girl revived, promising to return soon and obtain for 
these afflicted ones all the aid they needed in their 
bereavement. 

A few weeks deepened immeasurably the gloom 
which had fallen on that now motherless household. 
Mr. 8 , naturally irritable, had become intoler- 
ably peevish in consequence of his many disappoint- 
ments. His temper had sorely tried his sick wife, 
and after her death it proved a source of continual 
suffering to her children. The boy, William, was 
seldom at home, and so escaped these domestic dis- 
comforts; but poor Nora, and her little suffering 
Fanny, were made to feel their bitterness daily, and 
almost hourly. 

For, to add to the pinching poverty they were 
enduring, their father lost his place of accountant. 
His haughty manner, which misfortune had not 
softened, his censorious and prying disposition, which 
a certain scrupulosity had only made more trouble- 



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WHAT AN ANGELIC DAUGHTER DID. 89 



some and intolerable to others, gave offence to every 
subordinate in the office. He also took it on himself 
to lecture his employers on certain transactions with 
the custom-house which excited his suspicion. Just 
as December was beginning to tax to the utmost 
Nora's resources in housekeeping her father was 
dismissed. 

This was terrible news for the poor child of fifteen, 
who knew not where to look for the means of keep- 
ing a roof above them in a season rendered excep- 
tionally severe by intense cold, and the great dearth 
of all tilings. She was a stranger, too, in the city 
and their immediate neighbourhood, and to no human 
being, not even to her confessor, had she breathed a 
word of the utter destitution which had fallen on 
them. 

With the tidings of her father's dismissal a new 
enemy to her peace appeared. She had, strange as 
it may seem, never known by any experience of hers 
what drunkenness was, had never seen an intoxicated 
person. What was her horror and dismay to behold 
her dear parent in that condition ! Hitherto she 
only had eyes for his virtues ; in the light of her 
perfect innocence and sinlessness his imperfec- 
tions had been overlooked, or viewed only as the 
shadows inseparable from the bright sides of his 
character. 

It was a fearful revelation to the care-burdened 
girl. But her womanly instinct and true nobleness 
of nature impelled her, even when this first mani- 
festation of infirmity was renewed again and again, 
only to treat him whom she loved and reverenced 
so singularly, with the tenderness, the respect, the 



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40 



THE MIEROB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



delicacy due to a sick and helpless father. She hid 
him away from every eye, even from those of her 
young sister, who was encouraged to believe that the 
change she could not but remark was due to grief 
and exhaustion. Nora spent hours of the night in 
prayer, when all was still in her cottage, bedewing 
with her tews her mother's crucifix, and conversing 
with the court of heaven, as if the veil had been with- 
drawn, and she were permitted to plead for her dear 
ones at the Mercy Seat, and face to face with the 
Divine Majesty, 

From that Presence she always arose overflowing 
with comfort, with peace, and light, and strength, 
and the morning ever found her armed with increased 
courage for the struggle before her. It had been the 
invariable custom of her parents to perform together 
their night and i%orning devotions. Nora, by a 
happy inspiration, took her mother's place by his 
side from the beginning of his bereavement, and to 
his unspeakable satisfaction. Even when half stupe- 
fied by drink, he would be persuaded to kneel with 
her, and lift his soul to God : the morning never 
failed to find him humiliated, conscience-stricken, 
and self-accusing, but irritable and despondent. She 
never uttered one word of reproach, or so much as 
hinted, in their conversation, at the growing habit 
which filled her with undefinable terror and fore- 
boding. 

One night he returned late, she knew not whence, 
and, unable as he was to say his night prayers, had 
lain down half-undressed on his bed, his angel- 
daughter watching wearily near the half-opened door 
of his chamber. On awakii?g ? he was struck to the 



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WHAT AN ANGELIC DAUGHTER DID. 



41 



heart with sorrow, and when his pale and hollow- 
eyed child made her appearance, he cast himself on 
her neck in a mute agony of tears. She kissed him, 
soothed him, lavished on him words of love and com- 
fort, such as God puts on the lips of the pure and 
brave-hearted. At length, "0 Nora," he said, 
" this must be no more ! " and, kneeling by her side, 
they both prayed in silence. God heard their united 
prayers. That trial was thenceforth spared to Nora. 

Another blessing, a few days afterwards, rewarded 
her filial piety. She wrote to her father's late em- 
ployers, soliciting an interview, and received a 
favourable answer. Recommending, as was her 
wont in every serious undertaking, the success of her 
visit to the Father of the orphan and afflicted, she 
presented herself at the office, surprised and charmed, 
the chief partner with her beauty, her artless sim- 
plicity, the rare culture in one so young displayed 
during the interview, and especially by the eloquence 
with which she pleaded and won her father's case. 

Mr. S was given an occupation more suitable to 

his years and antecedents, and the daughter was 
delicately told of his former unpopularity and its 
causes. 

These, with all a woman's tact, Nora set about 
correcting, and, wonderful to relate, in good time 
she succeeded in effecting a great change in her 
father's temper, his bearing towards his associates 
in business hours, and his disposition to fault-finding. 
The humiliation which the old gentleman felt at his 
late weakness made him as docile as a child to his 
daughter's training. And so Nora was left free to 
devote herself to her sick sister, and to along and 



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42 THE MIRROR OP TROT "WOMANHOOD. 

earnest correspondence with her brother, whose 
duties compelled him to long absences, and whose 
health, as well as conduct, began to cause her watch- 
ful heart no little alarm. 

Fanny's constitutional debility had suffered much 
from the long journey the family had recently made 
to their new abode, as well as from her mother's 
death, and the loss of many luxuries and comforts the 
child had till then been accustomed to. About 
Christmas-tide the physician pronounced her case 
one of chronic spine- disease, but the sweet sufferer 
was not allowed to know of it. She seemed, how- 
ever to brighten, revive, and gain strength under the 
warm sunlight of her sister's love, and the tender 
nursing of that gentle and cunning hand. But just 

then Mr. S caught cold, and the illness soon 

assumed the form of a violent pleurisy, leaving little 
hopes of recovery, as the new year dawned on them. 

When the priest was summoned hurriedly on the 
evening of the great feast of Christmas, his impres- 
sion on entering the cottage was, as he afterwards 
declared, one of reverential awe, for a something 
heavenly seemed to pervade the atmosphere which 
filled it. The door was opened by Fanny, looking, 
in her simple dress of black, and with her dazzling 
complexion, like an angel just descended to tarry t 
brief space with the mourners. The whole house was 
decorated with evergreens and artificial flowers, but 
a refined taste had presided at the decoration, and 
was evident in the few simple ornaments of the 
mantel-piece, in the exquisite neatness of the sick- 
chamber, and in the preparation of the temporary 
altar for the Sacrament. The patient was in a deep 



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WHAT AN ANGELIC DAUGHTER DID. 



48 



slumber when the priest entered. Nora was kneel- 
ing by his side, her hand held in her parent's with 
so tight a grasp that she could not or dared not with- 
draw it without interrupting the repose which 
powerful narcotics had procured him. 

As she turned her head to greet the priest, he was 
struck with the rapt look of gratitude for his 
coming, and of adoration for the Gift of which he 
was the bearer. The poor slumberer soon awoke, 
and his spirit was prepared for the reception of the 
divine and awful graces ordained for the Christian's 
death-struggle by Him who is the Author and 
Finisher of our faith. Nora moved about the sick- 
room like some one of the virgin train who evermore 
accompany the Lamb, and her sister knelt at the foot 
of the bed, silently pouring forth her tears and 
prayers. When Holy Viaticum had been adminis- 
tered, and the last benediction given, the elder spoke 
to the priest with an air of quiet but preternatural 
fortitude. She knew what was coming, and trusted 
in the Comforter for strength to sustain her. 

Both on quitting and entering the cottage the 
priest had remarked that there was only fire in the 
sick-room ; his previous inquiries about the circum- 
stances of the family had elicited from the neighbours 
information enough to make him feel certain that 
Nora had to contend with great distress. From her- 
self he could obtain no answer to his timid and 
indirect questions. But it so happened that Mr. 

S 's employer, hearing of his serious illness, 

called, with his eldest son, on the priest, and begged 
the latter to accompany them to the cottage. It was 
a timely visit : a glance satisfied the merchant of the 



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14 



THE MIRBOB OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



urgent want of relief. The cottage was his property ; 
he resolved at once on making it most comfortable ; 
and, besides, begged Nora to draw at once her 
father's full year's salary, which was trebled without 
her knowledge. The most skilful medical aid was 
also secured, and a lively interest was created by 
the good priest's frequent praise of these afflicted 
strangers. 

William hastened to his father's sick-bed, travel- 
ling night and day from the upper Mississippi, where 
he and his patron were superintending the building 
of a bridge. Whether he had inherited his mother's 
constitutional weakness, or his frame was not proof 
against the fatigue of so long a journey, and the 
discomforts and privations from which his very slender 
purse could not purchase an exemption, he reached 
the house of death only to be prostrated with fever. 
His father died a few hours after his son's arrival, 
and the good priest who had been the former's con- 
soler in his last hours was called in to minister to the 
latter, before his parent had been borne to the ceme- 
tery and laid beside his wife. 

Nora, with a woman's fortitude, bore up against 
this new trial, and God, who has stored up in a 
woman's heart such treasures of love and enduring 
devotion, enabled this tender girl, exhausted as she 
was by the grief and labours of all these weary 
months, to be for her brother all she had been for 
both her parents. There were no Sisters of Charity 
at hand ; but the merchant's wife, a Protestant lady 
of rare goodness, had visited Nora under her new 
affliction, and insisted on remaining with her for a 
few days. The principal Catholic ladies, also, 



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\teAT AN ANGELIO DAT7QHTEB DID. 



40 



touched by what they heard, came to sympathise and 
to admire ; and to see the lovely orphans was to 
become attached to them. But Nora would devolve 
on no one her duties towards her sick brother, on 
whom both she and Fanny now centred their entire 
affection. 

Their brother was saved. And now, why delay 
the reader? William's convalescence was a long 
and painful one. He had inherited his father's 
peevishness, and had apparently lost, in his some- 
what wandering life as civil engineer, every trace of 
the early piety inculcated by his mother. People 
wondered that such anunamiable and God-abandoned 
youth could have come of the same parentage as the 
two angelic beings whom he called sisters. 

Nora, while he was slowly recovering his strength, 
had been casting about for some occupation which 
might enable her to maintain the two now entirely 
thrown on her care. The merchant's wife continued 
to be devoted to the orphans, and had occasionally 
brought her son to visit William during the latter's 
convalescence. When able to bear exercise in the 
open air, the two young men drove out together, and 
so an intimacy gradually sprang up between the two 
families. It was remarked, not without wonder, that 
under Nora's influence William became gradually 
transformed into another man. But few traces of 
his petulance and irritability remained. Indeed, 
after the first weeks of his recovery, the frequent 
oaths which startled the echoes of that quiet abode 
were heard no more, and the old habit of night and 
morning prayer was resumed, William, from his bed 
or his arm-chair, heartily joining in his sister's 



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46 THE MIRROR OF TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



devotions. A new moral sense seemed to be growing 
up in him, refining, not only his language, but his 
very features ; so that before spring had passed into 
summer the neighbours, who at first could see but a 
slight resemblance between the sisters and their 
coarse and burly brother, were struck with the re- 
markable likeness he bore them in features and 
expression. 

It was not all : the merchant's son had seen too 
much of Nora not to have been charmed with her 
beauty of soul, much more even than with her graces 
of person. His mother shared his admiration of 
such extraordinary worth, nor was his father indif- 
ferent to the virtues which he had himself more than 
once warmly eulogised. Nora, after imploring the 
divine guidance, and consulting the priest who had 
been her counsellor and benefactor, listened favour- 
ably to the young merchant's suit, and accepted 
gratefully his mother for her own. When the days 
of mourning were ended, just as another spring was 
spreading her fairest charms over earth and sky, she 
became the wife of this lover, having her sweet 
Fanny with her as the angel of her home. They are 
both, at this day, the models of Christian mothers and 
maidens in another land, whither the young hus- 
band's extensive business forced him to transfer his 
residence ; they are the idols of the young and the 
worshipped benefactresses of the poor and suffering, 
blessed in hundreds of homes to which they bring 
light and comfort, prized in their own above all 
earthly treasures, and more and more reverenced 
by those who daily and hourly witness their good- 
ness and humility. 



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THE WIFE IN THE CHRISTIAN HOME. 



47 



CHAPTER V. 

TEE WIFE IN THE CHRISTIAN HOME. 

The Church, among her solemn benedictions, had 
one for every dwelling-house, being the same for that 
of the poorest man and for that of the wealthiest, 
for the lowliest cottier on his little plot of ground, as 
well as for the royal palace. Just as she lovingly 
blessed and guarded near her temples the bodies of 
her children, without distinction of rank, even so she 
was desirous of hallowing by her prayers every spot 
in city or in country where her dear ones were born 
and reared, and where she would have God's angels 
live with them as their unseen guardians, companions, 
and helpers. 

" We send up our supplications to Thee, 0 God, 
the Almighty Father " (one form of blessing begins), 
" in behalf of this dwelling, of all who live therein, 
and of all things within it ; praying that Thou do 
bless and sanctify it, and fill it with all good things. 
Grant them, 0 Lord, plenty from out the dew of 
heaven, the sustenance of life from out the fat of the 
earth, and fulfil their desires in thy mercy. On our 
entering this house, therefore, do Thou deign to bless 
and sanctify this abode as Thou didst vouchsafe to 
bless the house of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob ; and 



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48 



THE MUtBOB OF TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



within these -walls let the angels who behold thy 
light abide, to guard this home and its inmates." 

Another ancient benediction added : " Abide ye in 
peace in your home : may the Lord grant you rest, 
and peace, and comfort, from all your enemies round 
about ! May He bless you from his throne on high, 
as you rest or walk, sleeping or waking ; and may 
your family nourish to the third and fourth genera- 
tion ! " Elsewhere the Eoman Ritual says, in another 
form of blessing : " Bless, 0 Lord, God Almighty, 
this house, that in it may abide health, chastity, 
victory, fortitude, humility, goodness, and meekness, 
the fulness of the law, and thanksgiving towards 
God the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Ghost." 

In the design of God's fatherly providence, as well 
as in the intention of the Church, the Christian 
family-home is a place " blessed and sanctified," over 
which, with its inmates, angels keep watch and ward. 
This divine protection and angelic watchfulness secure 
" peace " and safety from all surrounding dangers ; 
the blessing is fruitful in " health" of body and 
soul, in that purity of life which renders the inhabi- 
tants of the home worthy of being the fellow- servants 
and citizens of the angels, in victory over self, in that 
fortitude which ever strengthens man to bear and to 
forbear, in that humility which keeps us like little 
children in presence of the Divine Majesty, in "good- 
ness and meekness/' in the loving accomplishment of 
the law which is only the expression of his will, and 
in devout gratitude towards that Trinity of Persons 
•whose blissful society in the life to come is to be the 
completion and reward of the home-life, sanctified 
and made most happy by every duty fulfilled. 



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ANGELS GTTAUD THE CATHOLIC HOME. 49 

In thus setting forth the sanctity of the Christian 
home, and the exhalted nature of the duties and the 
virtues which should adorn it, we are only endeavour- 
ing to recall men's minds to the venerable ideals so 
dear to our fathers, and to those " ancient paths " 
from which modern free-thinking would lead the 
young generation to stray. 

ANGELS GUARD THE CATHOLIC HOME. 

It is for every father, who is, by the divine law of 
nature, king in his own family, to consider well the 
truth here presented to him, and to conceive of his 
own little kingdom the pure and lofty notion, which 
is that of the divine mind as well as the mind of the 
Church. When a father, though never so poor, 
firmly believes that his little home and his hearth- 
stone are a thing so precious and so holy that God 
will have " his angel keep, cherish, protect, visit, and 
defend it, and all who dwell therein," he, too, will 
lift up his eyes and his heart to that Father over all 
and most loving Master, and exert himself daily and 
hourly " to walk before Him and be perfect." 

But it is to his companion, the queen of that little 
kingdom, the wife, that it is most necessary to have 
high and holy thoughts about the sacredness of her 
charge, the obligations incumbent on her, the in- 
calculable good which she can do, and the many 
powerful helps towards its accomplishment that the 
All- Wise and Ever-Present is sure to multiply under 
her hand. 

To every true man and woman now living there is 
no being on earth looked up to with so pure, so 
deep, so grateful, so lasting a love, as a mother. 
5 



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50 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

Let UB look at our mother, then, in that dear and 
holy relation of wife which she bears to him who 
was for us in childhood the representative of the God 
"of whom all paternity in heaven and earth is 
named." 

woman's duties as wot. 

The first duty of the wife is to study to be, in every 
way she can, the companion, the help, and the friend 
of her husband. Indeed, on her capacity to be all 
this, and her earnest fulfilment of this threefold 
function, depends all the happiness of both their 
lives, as well as the well-being of the whole family. 
Hence the obligation which is incumbent on parents 
providing for the establishment of their children, to 
see to it, so far as is possible, that the person chosen 
to be a wife in the new home should be a true com- 
panion for their son, a true helpmate in all his toil, 
and a faithful friend through all the changes of 
fortune. 

SHE OUGHT TO BE A COMPANION TO HER HUSBAND. 

One half of the unhappiness of married life comes 
from the fact that the wife is either unfitted or un- 
willing to be a true companion to her husband. 
This companionship requires that she should be 
suited, by her qualities of mind, and heart, and 
temper, to enter into her husband's thoughts, and 
tastes, and amusements, so as to make him find in 
her company and conversation a perfect contentment 
and delight. 

Persons who are perfectly companionable never 
weary of each other ; indeed, they are never perfectly 



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SEE OUGHT TO BE A COMPANION. 51 

happy while away from eaoh [other ; they enter into 
each other's thoughts, reflect (and increase by the 
reflection) the light in each other's mind ; cultivate 
the same tastes, pursue the same ideals, and complete 
each other in the interchange of original or acquired 
knowledge. 

But there is more than that in the companionship 
of the true wife. She studies to make herself agree- 
able, delightful, and even indispensable to him who 
is her choice among all men. If true love be in her 
heart it will suggest to her, day by day, a thousand 
new devices for charming the leisure of her husband. 

"Woman has been endowed by the Creator with a 
marvellous fertility in this respect; it is an unlimited 
power, productive of infinite good when used for a 
holy purpose, and within her own kingdom; but 
productive of infinite evil when employed in opposi- 
tion to the design of the Giver, or allowed to lie idle 
when it should be used to promote the sacred ends of 
domestic felicity. 

There are wives who will study certain languages, 
sciences, arts, or accomplishments, in order to make 
themselves the companions of the men they love, and 
thus be able to converse with them on the things 
they love most, or to charm the hours of home repose 
by music and song. The writer of these lines re- 
members that, while a young priest in Quebec, 
upwards of thirty years ago, he was much struck by 
seeing a young lady of one of the best families there, 
applying herself assiduously to study the sign-lan- 
guage of the deaf-mutes, in order to converse easily 
with her husband, a wealthy young merchant, 
thoroughly trained himself in the admirable Deaf 



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52 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

and Dumb Institution of his native city. They were 
devoted to each other, and the young wife's earnest- 
ness in making herself companionable to her husband, 
must have brought many a blessing on the home in 
which the writer beheld them so wrapt in each other, 
so virtuous, and so full of bright hope ! 

It must not be concluded from this, that a woman 
who applies herself to acquire knowledge for the 
purpose of being more of a companion to her hus- 
band, should thoroughly master either a language, a 
science, or an art. ... In the case of the young 
wife just mentioned, a thorough familiarity with the 
language of signs was indispensable as a means of 
easy conversation with her husband. But this is 
evidently an exceptional case, and is only mentioned 
to show what difficulties love will overcome to be 
helpful or agreeable to its companion. 

The word helpful, just used, will furnish to every 
wife the true measure of the knowledge she may be 
prompted to acquire. Her husband has to know 
perfectly whatever he knows, because his success as 
a professional man, or a business man, depends on 
this thorough knowledge, whereas his wife only 
acquires to please and to help her companion. 

But there are other things besides this scientific, 
literary, or artistic knowledge, which may be more 
needful to a wife, if she would make herself of all 
earthly beings the most delightful and necessary 
companion to her husband. She must study him, 
his needs, his moods, his weak as well as his strong 
points, and know how to make him forget himself 
when he is moody and selfish, and bring out every 
joyous side of his nature when he is prone to sadness. 



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SHE OUGHT TO BE A COMPANION. 



53 



God, who has made the soul both of man and of 
woman, and who has united them in the duties and 
burdens of home-life, wills that they should complete 
each other. Man has bodily strength, because it is 
his duty to labour for the home and protect it ; ho 
has also certain mental and moral qualities which 
woman does not need, and which fit him for the 
battle of life and his continual struggle with the 
crowd; but she has, on her part far more of fortitude, 
of that power to bear and to forbear, to suffer silently 
and uncomplainingly herself while ministering, with 
aching heart and head, to the comfort, the cheerful* 
ness, the happiness of all around her. 

At any rate, she has by nature the power, the art, 
and the disposition to please, to soothe, to charm, 
and to captivate. It is a wonderful power, and we 
see, daily, women exerting it in a wonderful way, 
and for purposes that God cannot bless, and that 
every right conscience must condemn. Why will not 
women who are truly good, or who sincerely strive to 
be so, not make it the chief study of their lives to 
find out and acquire the sovereign art of making their 
influence as healthful, as cheering, as blissful as the 
sunlight and the warmth are to their homes ? 

Let us give an example of what is meant here, 
and this illustration will suggest of itself many other 
applications. We all know — a mother more than 
anyone else—what a potent spell praise is in making 
children master whatever they are learning, and, 
what is far more difficult, acquire a mastery over 
themselves, both in repressing wrong inclinations, 
and in gaining the habits of the noblest virtues. A 
word of praise from a mother will stir the heart of 



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54 TfiB MEREOB, OF TEXTS "WOMANHOOD . 



every well-born child — and few children are ill-born, 
that is, with radically bad dispositions — to the most 
extraordinary exertions, and fill the whole soul with 
delight, when that word is sweetly spoken of success- 
ful efforts made. "We say nothing here of the 
stimulus which praise from the queen of the 
home gives to the zeal and conscientious labours 
of servants. 

"We are ooncerned with the master of the home. 
Do you not know that all men, even old men, even 
the proudest and coldest men, are only great children, 
who thirst for praise from a wife, a mother, or a 
sister's lips? There are men, and they are the 
noblest, the most high-souled, who care but little, if 
anything, for the praise or censure of the crowd, even 
of the learned or titled crowd ; but their heart is 
stirred through all its depths by one sweet word from 
the lips of mother, sister, or wife. Why, 0 women, 
are you so niggard of a money which you can bestow 
without making yourselves the poorer, and which 
your dear ones prize above gold and gems ? 

Give generously, but discerningly, what is held so 
dear as coming from you, and which will only encou- 
rage those you love above all the world to strive 
to-morrow for still higher excellence, and look for- 
ward to still sweeter praise. 

THE WIFE A8 HELPMATE IN THE HOME. 

In the earthly paradise of the true Christian home 
the wife is a helpmate, the equal of her husband, 
neither his inferior nor his servant. It is not in such 
homes that our modern theories or discussions about 



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THB WIFE AB HELPMATE IN THE HOME. 55 

11 Woman's Rights," or "The Sphere of Woman," 
have originated. No woman animated by the spirit 
of her baptism, filled with the humility and gene- 
rosity which are the soul of that self-sacrificing love 
indispensable to husband and wife in the performance 
of their undivided life-labour, ever fancied that she 
had or could have any other sphere of duty or aotivity 
than that home which is her domain, her garden, her 
paradise, her world. There, if she is truly a wife, all 
are subject to her, even her husband. There never 
existed a true-souled Christian man who did not 
believe himself and demean himself from his bridal 
hour till his dying day like a willing and loving ser- 
vant of his wife inside his own home. 

This is true, especially of the home of the wealthy 
and the great, where reigns, and should ever reign, 
the infinite respect and reverence of man for woman, 
in whom Christian faith bids us see the majesty and 
purity of her who is Mother of Christ. There is no 
excuse for the high-born and the wealthy, when they 
fail to honour themselves by doing service inside 
their homes to mother, wife, and sister. The diffi- 
culty will here be with the poor man, the labouring 
man, coming home at evening, worn out by the toil 
of the day, faint with hunger, too, and fearful, it may 
be, of the morrow. Has he not to be served rather 
than serve? 

The answer is an easy one, and easily understood, 
where minds are enlightened and hearts are upright. 
If the poor man's wife has done her duty through- 
out the day, she will have found in her home-work 
enough to weary. The very labour of preparing for 
her husband and her sons, perhaps, the meal which 



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D*8 FRIEND. 57 



the ollico of the 

irt fails him, and 
aent or difficulty, 
Vnd if this help is 
ibovo all price in 
3, of business liffi- 
Ld bleak, and hope- 
uch more valuable 
i soul's welfare, in 
s. and stormy hours 

the next and dearest 
jeing tho truest and 



ND S FRIEND. 

purpose, is told by a 
A man wished to 
ed at that time as a 
did, the tomb of the 
wealthy man but not 
ble wife, whose worth 
pany he neglected for 
layed friends with him 
a of his money. As he 
grimage he asked his 
; them from Cologne, 
like a rich cloak, and 
iy a tunic of rare stuff, 
he should get for her, 
bring back sense and 



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56 THE MIRROR OF TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 

is to restore their strength, and the care required to 
brighten up that home so as to make it look a para- 
dise of repose for them, is the task of her who is the 
natural helper in the household, and whose blessed 
help consists precisely in making the home what it 
ought to be — man's heart-rest from all outside cares. 

But that is enough about the fundamental notion 
of equality between husband and wife, the father and 
the mother in the Christian family. Both are neces- 
sary to each other ; they ought to have but one heart 
and one mind in the pursuit of the one great purpose 
of their lives — the happiness of their home and the 
rearing to the practice of all goodness the children 
whom God sends them. Understanding this, their 
only true position towards each other, the husband 
never can entertain any notion of domineering over 
his wife, nor the wife feel any sense of servile in- 
feriority towards her husband. 

But the love which binds her to him is an enlight- 
ened love, which makes her view their respective 
labours as only two distinct parts of one task. Be- 
sides all that she accomplishes in ordering, brighten- 
ing, and warming the home, there are a thousand 
ways in which she can be a helpmate to her husband, 
beyond what is required for mere companionship. 

For it is one thing to be delightful company to a 
person one is travelling with, by being able to con- 
verse with him in his own language, or to discuss 
with him every favourite topic, or to enter into his 
recreations and amusements with zest, and thus to 
lighten the weariness of the road and charm away its 
dulness, and another to be a helper. One's com- 
panion may fail in strength, or be beset with dangers 



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THE WIFE AS HER HUSBAND'S FRIEND. 57 

and difficulties, and then it is that the office of the 
helper begins. 

It is precisely when man's heart fails him, and 
his courage yields to disappointment or difficulty, 
that woman comes to his aid. And if this help is 
most sweet and welcome and above all price in 
moments of professional weariness, of business diffi- 
culties, or when all seems dark, and bleak, and hope- 
less to the stoutest heart, how much more valuable 
is it in matters which concern the soul's welfare, in 
troubles of the heart, in the dark and stormy hours 
of temptation ! 

But we must not trench on the next and dearest 
function of wifely love — that of being the truest and 
most faithful of friends. 

THE WIFE AS HER HUSBAND* 8 FRIEND. 

A story, very apposite to our purpose, is told by a 
writer of the middle ages. A man wished to 
make a visit to Cologne, famed at that time as a 
pilgrimage, possessing, as it did, the tomb of the 
Three Wise Kings. He was a wealthy man but not 
a wise one. He had an admirable wife, whose worth 
he knew not, and whose company he neglected for 
that of two neighbours, who played friends with him 
because he was rich and lavish of his money. As he 
was setting out on his pilgrimage he asked his 
friends what he should bring them from Cologne. 
One answered that he would like a rich cloak, and 
the other begged him to buy a tunic of rare stuff. 
He next asked his wife what he should get for her, 
and she besought him to bring back sense and 



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58 



THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



wisdom, which might enable him to see and correct 
the evil of his ways. 

After having paid his devotions at the shrine of 
the Three Kings, he went among the merchants, 
bought the cloak and the tunic, but sought in vain 
for someone who would sell him sense and wisdom. 
They were not to be found in the market. As he 
returned crestfallen to his inn, the host inquired why 
he seemed downcast, and, learning the cause, advised 
him, on his return home, to pretend to his friends 
that he had lost all his money and could give them 
neither cloak nor tunic. He followed this piece of 
advice, and both of the false friends turned him out 
of doors, abusing him as a fool and a vagabond. 

Not so his wife, however : he told her the story of 
his loss ; but she, seeing that he was weary from the 
road, and filled with sorrow and indignation because 
of this ill-treatment, tenderly embraced him, consoled 
and refreshed him, assured him that God would send 
him heavenly treasures for the money he had lost. 
So his eyes were opened to know what wealth he 
possessed in her true love and faithful friendship ; 
and thus did he " find sense and wisdom from having 
visited the City of the Three Kings."* 

"What is friendship ?" asks Alcuin, and he 
answers forthwith, " A similitude of souls. ,, Where 
the wife labours conscientiously to be a true com- 
panion to her husband, there is little fear but she 
will also become a true, faithful, and constant friend ; 
for the successful effort made to establish perfect 
companionship must end in effecting that " similitude 

* Joannes, Magnum Speculum, 12. 



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THE WIFE AS HER HT7SBA20)'s FRIEND. 59 

of souls " which constitutes the essence and ground 
of friendship. 

The reasons which will urge every right-minded 
and true-hearted woman to be the most delightful 
and constant of companions, and the most devoted of 
helpmates, must also inspire her with the resolution 
of being the most cherished of friends. She must 
not be jealous of the men for whom her husband 
entertains feelings of real friendship. On the con- 
trary, it were wise to vie with him in showing them 
every mark of regard, as if she were thereby the 
interpreter of his dearest wishes. Nothing pleases 
a man more than to see his old and true friends 
warmly acknowledged and treated with all honou* 
and affection by the persons most dear to him. 

This, however, is only a passing admonition to 
which every woman who is careful of her home- 
duties will do well to attend. It is not only virtue, 
but good policy in a wife to have the sincere good- 
will and respect of all who consider themselves to be 
her husband's friends. Not only will they contribute 
much to the pleasantness of the home in which they 
are always welcome and honoured guests, but they 
will not fail to spread far and wide the fame of its 
-hospitality, and the good name of its mistress. 

It happens but too often that women will take it 
into their heads to regard the friends of their hus- 
band as persons who steal away a heart which should 
exclusively belong to themselves, and through an 
unwise and narrow jealousy make themselves odious, 
and their homes intolerable to men whom they 
ought to conciliate and to bind to themselves. More 
than one wife has lost for eve* the heart of her 



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60 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

husband, and destroyed the peace of her fireside by 
such insane conduct. 

Let the young and the wise take warning there- 
from, and learn betimes how a true wife can be the 
counsellor, the guide, as well as the sanctifier and 
saviour of her husband. And here let a practical 
example dispense us from pursuing the subject 
further, 



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DUTIES OF THE WIFE* 



61 



CHAPTER VI. 

DUTIES OF THE WIFE AS THE DISPENSER OF THE 
HOME TREASURES. 

Nothing so animates the head of a family to honour- 
able exertion as the certainty that his wife bestows 
her utmost care in providing for the comfort of his 
home, in dispensing wisely the store which he places 
at her disposal ; making it her rule to be just to him 
by never exceeding his means when she cannot in- 
crease them by her industry ; in being just to her 
children, by supplying them with becoming raiment, 
food, and instruction ; just to her servants, whom she 
treats with a motherly tenderness which never con- 
descends to familiarity; and just to God's poor, 
whose claims she holds to be most sacred. 

But let us proceed understandingly. The first 
care of the wife is to establish discipline and order : 
discipline, without which there may be much noise 
and agitation, but no work done ; and order, because 
where there is confusion everything is out of place, 
or done out of its proper time. To have discipline, 
where there are children and servants, the mistress 
must have authority, and she must assert and 
establish her authority by being both firm and calm, 
and giving everyone to understand that she means 
what she says, and what she says must be done. 



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62 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



Order means that every work must be done in its 
proper time, and everything in the house be put in 
its proper place. Order means economy both of time 
and of labour ; for where every occupation has its 
own appointed time, the household duties are sure to 
be attended to, and to be fulfilled with singular ease 
and pleasure. 

If this order and economy of time are necessary in 
large households, it is still more so in the home of 
the poor man, where everything has to be done 
single-handed by the wife. There are poor house- 
holds — those of the daily labourer, the poor trades- 
man — where the wife, with a large family of children 
to care for, will quietly get through an amount of 
work of different kinds that would seem to require 
the joint energy of several persons. Go into these 
bright and orderly homes, where the housewife rests 
not from early dawn till long after sunset of the 
longest day, and see the cleanliness, the tidiness, the 
calm, and the contentment that fill the place like an 
atmosphere 1 

Of course, there will be comfort for all where there 
is such order ; for there can be comfort with poverty, 
or, at least, with little, though never with want. 
There will be comfort for the husband when he 
returns to that bright, warm, pleasant hearth, where 
the deep love of his companion fills the house with a 
spiritual fragrance more pleasant than all the flowers 
of spring ; there will be comfort at the simple meal 
set on the board shining with cleanliness ; and there 
will be comfort in the sweet conversation in which 
the outside world is forgotten, in the joy of being all 
in all to each other ; and there will be bliss in the 



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MAN RESPONSIBLE FOB HIS STEWARDSHIP. 63 



night's rest won by hard and hearty toil, and undis- 
turbed by peevish ambition, or by the dreams of a 
spirit at war with God or the neighbour. 

There will be loveliness, too, in the home where 
true love causes order and comfort to reign ; for the 
poorest room can be made lovely by a woman's 
cunning hand. She can have flowers at her window, 
and flowers on her mantel and her table ; and the 
curtains of windows and beds may be beautified by 
some simple ornament devised by a woman's taste, 
and executed in spare moments by the hand of even 
the busiest. 

There is not one among the readers of this book 
but has seen such homes — albeit lowly, narrow, 
and poor, in the literal sense — in which this order, 
comfort, and loveliness gave the beholder the evi- 
dence of a womanly spirit that might have graced a 
palace. This remark, however, is only preliminary 
to what pertains to the wife's stewardship in her 
home. 

MAW, IN EVERY CONDITION, RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS 
STEWARDSHIP. 

We must not, especially in an age which tends 
daily more and more to deny that man owes any 
account to God for the use of the wealth he chances 
to possess — whether that be inherited from his 
ancestors, or obtained by his own thrift and indus- 
try — be carried away by the torrent of error. No 
matter whence derived, all that man has, as well as 
all that he is, belongs to God, his Creator, and Lord, 
and Judge ; and to Him must he return to give an 
account of the use which he will have made of his 



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64 THE MTRBOR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



being, his life, his time, his property. Reason, even 
without the light of supernatural revelation, teaches 
this truth as fundamental and unquestionable. 

The great and the rich will have to account for 
their stewardship, for the uses to which they have 
put their time, their riches, their power, their in- 
fluence, their opportunities, just as the labouring 
poor will have to account for their thrift, and the 
awful uses to which one may see, day by day, our 
hard-working heads of families put their earnings, 
in drunkenness, gambling, and all manner of vice. 

But, as we have said, it is the province of the 
housewife to be, at home, a wise steward in the use 
of her husband's means, while his chief business is, 
outside of the home, to procure these means by 
honourable industry. Both are responsible to God. 
The wife's immediate responsibility, however, is 
towards her husband. She is his minister, his eye, 
his hand, his head, and heart, in applying his wealth 
or the produce of his industry to the ends for which 
God wills it to be employed. 

THE STEWARDSHIP OP THE WEALTHY WIFE. 

Of persons of royal, princely, or noble rank, we 
do not think it necessary to treat in this place. We 
speak of wealth, wheresoever it exists, and of the 
duties and responsibilities of the wife in its home 
uses. 

Hers should be a wise economy. "Wisdom consists 
in a clear perception of the ends or \ises for which 
money is to serve, and in the careful adaptation of 
one's means to one's expenditure. You have so 
much and no more to spend each week, or each 



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STEWARDSHIP OF THE WEALTHY WIFE. 65 

month, or each year ; you have so many wants to 
provide for : let your wisdom be proved by always 
restraining your outlay so as to have a little balance 
left in your favour. 

We know of a wife, a young wife, too, who, after 
her bridal, was made the mistress of a luxurious 
home, in which her fond husband allowed her un- 
limited control. They were more than wealthy, and 
his business relations and prospects were such as to 
promise certain and steady increase for the future. 
Still, the young wife did not allow herself to be 
lavish or extravagant. She provided generously for 
the comforts of her home, for the happiness of her 
servants, for the duties of a generous hospitality ; 
she had an open hand for all charities and good 
works. But she was also, young as she was, mind- 
ful of the future, and this wise forethought is 
eminently the characteristic of women. Without 
ever whispering a word of her purpose to her hus- 
band, she resolved, from the beginning of their 
housekeeping, that she would lay by in a safe bank 
her weekly economies. The husband, in all likeli- 
hood, would have deemed this saving an ill omen, 
pointing to future calamity. It was, however, only 
the prophetic instinct of the wise woman who, in the 
heat of summer, and the overflowing plenty of 
autumn, looked forward to " the cold of snow," and 
made store for the need, and warmth, and comfort of 
her household. 

The " calamity w came after a good many years ; it 
came by a fatal chain of circumstances in which the 
misfortunes or dishonesty of others brought ruin on 
the upright, and prudent, and undeserving. One day 



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66 



THE MIEEOE 07 TET7E WOMANHOOD. 



the husband came home with heavy heart, and tried 
in vain to hide his care from the penetrating eyes of 
love. He had to break to his wife the dreadful news 
of their utter ruin. She listened unmoved to his 
story : " All is not lost, my dear husband," she said ; 
"I have been long preparing for this. If you 
will go to such a bank, you will find enough 
laid up there to secure us either against want or 
poverty." 

In order to secure this wise and provident economy, 
even in the midst of wealth, two extremes must be 
avoided: parsimony, which destroys domestic comfort 
and makes the mistress of the proudest house 
despicable in the eyes of her cook, her butcher, and 
her grocer; and waste or extravagance, which is 
ruinous to the largest fortunes, and most criminal in 
the sight of God. " Waste not ; want not," used to 
be inscribed on the huge bread-platters of our 
fathers, both in the servants' hall and the family 
dining-room. "Waste not; want not," ought to be 
the rule of every housewife in all departments of 
household economy. Waste is always a sin against 
God, against your husband and children, as well as 
against the poor, who have a right to what is 
thus thrown away ; and, forget it not, waste never 
fails to lead to want, as surely as stripping a tree 
of its bark is followed by its pining away and 
withering. 

Another rule, which a wise woman will never 
violate, is to tell her husband when she exceeds her 
means or allowance. It is fatal concealment to allow 
debts to accumulate without one's husband's know- 
ledge; it tempts the woman, weak enough to do 



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THE WOT THE DI8PENSEB OF HOSPITALITY. 67 

so, to have recourse to most unworthy and most 
dangerous expedients, which are sure to be known 
in the end, and to lower the culprit or ruin her for 
ever in her husband's esteem. The equivocations, 
and the downright falsehoods, which are often used 
as means of concealment, cannot but be considered 
by every right-minded man as a greater calamity 
than the accumulation of the largest debt, or the loss 
of an entire fortune. 

In this respect, as indeed in every other, no con- 
cealment will be found to be the wife's only true 
policy, and to secure this policy of no concealment 
let her make it the study of her life to have nothing 
to conceal. 

THE WIFE THE DISPENSER 07 HOSPITALITY. 

To the wife's stewardship belongs also the dis- 
charge of a most important, not to say most sacred 
duty, that of hospitality. It is one of the chief 
functions of the divine virtue of charity. Of its 
nature, its necessity, and its importance, we do not 
wish to discourse here. Few are the homes and the 
hearts to which hospitality is a stranger. Those 
whom this book may reach will easily understand 
what the word means, without either definition or 
description. We can, therefore, convey our instruc- 
tion by the simplest method. 

Whoever is received into your home as a guest — 
precisely because he is your guest — forget everything 
else to make his stay delightful. It matters little 
whether persons thus hospitably received may or may 
not appreciate your generosity, your cordiality, and 
that true waimth of a welcome like yours, inspired 



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68 THE MIBBOB OF TBUB WOMANHOOD. 



T>y Christian motives much more than by worldly 
reasons ; it matters much for you that none should 
ever enter your home without finding it a true 
Christian home, or should leave it without taking 
away with them the pleasant memory of their stay, 
and a grateful recollection of you and yours. 
Doubtless, some will be found whom no courtesy, no 
kindness, no warmth of hospitality, can change from 
what they are, little-minded, narrow-hearted, selfish, 
cold, and unable to judge the conduct of others by 
any other standard than their own low thoughts and 
sentiments; They are only like bats entering a 
banquet-hall by one window, and passing out at the 
opposite, after having fluttered blindly about the 
lights, or clung for a few instants to the walls or the 
ceiling. Let them come and let them go. The 
social and spiritual atmosphere of the place is not 
for them 

Nor must you complain of the number. It is 
wonderful how much place a large-hearted woman 
can find for her company, even in a very small house ! 
A hospitable spirit can do wonders in its way : it can 
make the water on the board more delicious than the 
wines of Portugal, Spain, or France, or Italy ; it can 
make the bread which it places before stranger or 
friend as sweet as the food of the gods; it can 
multiply its own scanty stores, as the Master did 
with the loaves in the wilderness ; for God's bless- 
ing is with the hospitable soul to increase, to multiply, 
and to sweeten ; to fill all who sit at her board with 
plenty, with joy, with thanksgiving. 



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THE DEVOTED WIFE. 



69 



HOW A NOBLE HUSBAND WAS SUSTAINED BT A DEVOTED 
WIFE WHILE PASSING THROUGH FINANCIAL DIFFI- 
CULTIES. 

One family, in particular, will help to teach the 
reader that womanly excellence is no rare or recent 
flower on the soil of the New World. A young wife, 
born among the western valleys, and wedded to the 
man of her choice, had encouraged him in a chival- 
rous literary enterprise, which promised precious and 
plentiful fruit for the highest purposes of patriotism 
as well as religion. Their home had been blessed by 
six beautiful children, reared by the accomplished 
mother with inconceivable tenderness and care. It 
had be v en the delight of the grandparents to fill that 
home with every article of furniture and object of 
art which could make it, what it was in reality, a 
paradise for its inmates, as well as for a large and 
devoted circle of friends. 

But the mind, the hand, and the heart of the 
happy young wife it was that gave to that home its 
bright look of refinement, of goodness, of perfeot 
happiness. 

One day, while she and her eldest daughter were 
wreathing some flowers round the frame of a 
favourite picture, the husband and father came in, 
and received from both the usual rapturous welcome. 
"Look, my dear," the proud little housewife ex- 
claimed, after the first greeting, " look and see if 
anything can be more beautiful than this room! 
Had we our choice from the richest stores and the 
rarest collections of art, what could we add to all this ? 
"What dear object could we part with for a better ? 99 



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70 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

The fond husband's eyes glanced rapidly round the 
room ; but they did not shine with the enthusiasm 
which fired his companion's. A oloud of a sudden 
settled on his brow, as if the question oaused a pang 
in spite of the strong effort he made to repress his 
emotion. To his wife's enthusiastic queries he only 
answered by bending oyer her and kissing her in 
silence. 

She divined that some misfortune had befallen or 
was impending ; and he, who had ever since their 
wedding day found in her a trusty friend and most 
wise counsellor, now told her that the enterprise 
which had promised to be a most profitable as well 
as a most beneficial investment, had proved a most 
ruinous failure ! 

His friends, he said, had generously offered to 
come to his assistance and lend him all the money 
needed to meet his engagements. To cumber him- 
self with this debt, or to sell his home and its costly 
furniture, was the only alternative left to them. He 
had not had courage to mention to her, till the last 
moment, the strait to which he was reduced, for he 
feared, and their friends feared, lest the parting with 
her beautiful home, and the loss of so many precious 
things should crush her. 

" You cannot hesitate, dearest," was the quick 
reply ; "we must part with everything rather than 
become dependent on others by being their debtors. 
You shall see how easy it will be to me to part with 
these treasures, provided I have a little home for you 
and our darlings, into which no creditor may intrude 
or pry. Am I not too rich and too happy with the 
wealth of love you and my children bring to me? w 



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THE DEVOTED WIFE. 



7t 



There was not a moment lost ; a little cottage was 
rented in another part of the city, and only the most 
needful articles of furniture were provided for parents, 
children, and servants; the busy hands of the young 
wife were never idle for several days beautifying the 
new home for the dear ones, who were kept, as well 
as friends and neighbours, in ignorance of the 
approaching change ; and the little ones soon found 
themselves all of a sudden transported to the new nest ! 

Then, to the astonishment of all in the neighbour- 
hood, and the regret of many, the auctioneer came, 
and piece after piece of the beautiful furniture — some 
of it made by the best upholsterers from the timber 
grown on the paternal estates far away — the objects 
of art and virt& 9 with which the young mother was 
wont to illustrate her lessons on the beautiful, given 
to the oldest children, and the dear piano, the gift of 
a fond mother, all were unhesitatingly sacrificed. 

But what was the astonishment of friends and 
relatives when, after a few days of pity or wonder- 
ment, they called on the brave little woman in her 
new home, to find it so fair, so bright, so beautiful 
The carpets were plain, it is true, and the furniture 
was of the commonest kind ; but chairs, and sofas, 
and ottomans had been covered with a chintz so 
pretty that no one stopped to inquire what was 
beneath the covering. There were white curtains to 
the windows, looped up with garlands of artificial 
flowers, and there were fragrant flowers on mantels 
and tables, and the little mistress was there with her 
face all aglow with happiness, with her sunny smile 
and merry laugh, and the warm, hospitable welcome 
for every friend and acquaintance ; and there, too, 



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72 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

were the rosy children, as unconscious of any change 
of fortune as the happy guests of Aladdin's fairy 
palaces, who found in one suite of apartments objects 
so ravishing that they quite forgot what they had 
seen before. The little ones saw no change around 
them, save that the light of their mother's smile was 
even more sunny than ever, that she loaded their 
dear father with fond caresses, and called forth from 
his big heart louder bursts of joy and mirth, and that 
she had been busier than ever with her active hands 
and restless needle in transforming and beautifying 
the face of things in every room with the smallest 
possible expense. 

The change of residence, as well as the circum- 
stances which occasioned it, only served to raise both 
husband and wife in the esteem of the community, 
and to inspire their intimate friends with a warm 
admiration for their magnanimity. And so the 
happy nestf ul increased, and the husband rose higher 
in public confidence and in his noble profession, 
while his wife bestowed her whole care on the lovely 
children, whom she educated herself in every branch 
of learning, and in every accomplishment necessary 
or suitable to their position. It was no small labour ; 
but she found it light, such was the order which she 
had established in her household, so sure was she 
of the devoted zeal of every one of her servants, and 
so delightful did she know how to make to her wor- 
shipping pupils every step in the most arid pathways 
of learning. 

And yet the house was ever full of visitors. The 
numerous relatives belonging to both families were 
always expected to make their homo with these good 



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THE WIFE AS THE FRIEND OF THE POOB. 73 

young people while in town, and there were friends 
who could not resist the attraction they felt for a 
family which seemed to them the ideal of human 
felicity. Limited as was their income, neither the 
husband nor the wife ever bestowed a thought on the 
expenditure consequent on such unbounded and un- 
interrupted hospitality. The little wife managed to 
have a bountiful table at all times, never an extrava- 
gant one, and thus she never once allowed her 
household expenses to go beyond her means. What 
made her table, her drawing-room, the whole atmos- 
phere of her home so full of an undefinable charm, 
was the love, the innocence, the paradisiacal purity 
and charity which parents and children shed around 
them. 

The dinners were true feasts of love and joyousness, 
and the evenings in the drawing-room were festivals 
of song, in which mother and children had the chief 
part, but in which all guests who could play or sing 
were impelled to join by some powerful spell. 

Those who had been privileged to share once or 
twice in this genuine hospitality, or who had been 
one or two evenings under the charm of that blissful 
family circle, would yearn to return. 

THE WIFE AS THE FRIEND OF THE POOR. 

We should have told how dear to the hearts of the 
poor, to the hearts, indeed, of all who were acquainted 
with misfortune and suffering in any shape, was the 
home into whose privacy we have been just glancing ; 
for every heart and every hand within it were ever 
open to the needy. We may intersperse through 
these pages many gracious acts of goodness and true 



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74 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



charity originating with the queen of that blessed 
home, just as the silversmiths of old would detach 
pearls and other gems from an over-rich crown to 
adorn the vesture of royalty or religion. So pass we 
now to that dear function of home-life in the good 
old Catholic times. 

And, connecting here hospitality towards the poor 
with almsgiving, let us see what was in that respect 
the spirit of the ages of faith. "Padua," Digby 
informs us, " had forty-five houses for the entertain- 
ment of poor strangers ; in Venice all comers were 
entertained by many Doges ; and, above all, say the 
old Italians, Vicenza was distinguished for its muni- 
ficence towards needy strangers. At Venice, the 
senators who presided over the public administration 
were so hospitable that the whole city resembled a 
hotel for guests, and a common home for all strangers 
coming to it. At Oesena everyone used to dispute 
for the honour of receiving the stranger, till, to 
obviate such quarrels, the pillar was erected, having 
a ring for each noble family, so that to whichever the 
stranger on arriving fastened his horse, to that family 
was he to repair. * Receive kindly whoever comes* says 
St. Francis in his rule— the spirit of which ruled 
many castles as well as cloisters—' all, whether friend 
or foe, thief or robber. 9 We read, indeed, of one proud 
castle standing near the road, over the portal of which 
the knight who built it, through the sole motive of 
vanity, caused lines to be inscribed . . . intend- 
ing to signify that no one should be received but 
knights, philosophers, or clerks, or noble ladies ; but 
the ancient legend states that, by a terrible vision, 
this knight was converted, and so delivered from hia 



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THE WIFE US THE FRIEND OF THE POOR. 75 

former error that he resolved thenceforth to entertain 
rather the poor, effacing that inscription, and sub- 
stituting for it words which signified that the naked 
and poor, the sick and infirm, and the exile and the 
pilgrim, would be thenceforth his guests."* 

In Brittany a most beautiful custom still exists, in 
spite of modern legislation, which tends to forbid 
almsgiving of every kind, and to prevent the poor, 
even when they have a hovel of their own, from 
leaving it and making their dire need known to their 
neighbours. The day following marriage is "the 
day of the poor." They troop from every side to the 
door of the happy pair, and find tables spread for 
them in the vast hall of the nobleman, when the bride- 
groom is such, or on the greensward when he is of 
inferior degree. The tables for the men are set on 
one side, those for the women on the other ; the bride- 
groom waiting on the former, and the bride attending 
to the comfort of those of her own sex. When they 
have had their fill, all dance together, and then take 
their leave, pouring blessings on their kind enter- 
tainers. Surely such blessings, and the heartfelt 
wishes and prayers of the poor, must be more profit- 
able to young people entering on the married state 
and its doubtful fortunes, than the idle congratula- 
tions of a fashionable throng, and the selfish modern 
custom of hastening from the foot of the altar to the 
railway train, or steamboat, in order to escape from 
the irksome duty of receiving friends, or feasting 
the poor. 

If from Brittany you cross, in imagination, the 
* Compitum, b. i., c. vi. 



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76 THE MEftEOE OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

broad expanse of sea which separates the western- 
most shores of France from Spain, you will find 
among another proud and ancient race, the Basques, 
with a faith by no means less deep than that of the 
Bretons, Catholio notions about poverty and alms- 
giving, which are full of eloquent meaning. Land 
at any point of that rock-bound shore, in any one of 
the fishing towns and villages so famous all through 
Christian history, and you will see how the few 
native poor, in a country where nobody is ever seen 
idle, are treated with a sovereign respect and tender- 
ness. A recent traveller,* landing at the little town 
of Elanchove, which clings, with its one street, to the 
almost perpendicular face of a mountain two thousand 
feet high, saw, as he toiled up that ladder-like street, 
" a poor old woman, all bent double with age, stand- 
ing at a door and asking for alms. A charming 
young married woman, her mouth all wreathed with 
smiles, hastened to come out. I saw her take from 
her pocket a small brass coin, kiss it, and then give 
it to the old woman. The latter took the alms, made 
with it very devoutly the sign of the cross on herself, 
and then kissed it in her turn. Such is the custom 
throughout the Basque country, and does it not add 
a touching grace to charity?" 

Such noble and touching customs as these are not, 
however, confined to Biscay or to Northern Spain ; 
they are everywhere characteristic of the Spanish 
Catholic. The lofty spirit of self-respect, which is 
the soul of the Spaniard, is shown in the reverence 
with which he treats the poor, whom word or look of 

* L. Louis-Lande, Trots Mois de voyage dans le Pays Basque. 



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THE "WTFB AS THE FRIEND 0* THE POOR. 77 

his will never humble ; but as his faith teaches him 
to consider Christ Himself present in the person of the 
beggar or of the sick man, his respect for them 
becomes downright and heartfelt veneration. 

It will cheer and enlighten us to gather some of 
these choice pearls of Spanish custom to deck our own 
crown of merit withal. "Cheating and extortion 
seem incompatible with the Spanish character. Even 
the poorest peasant who has shown us our way, and 
who has walked a considerable distance to do so, has 
invariably refused to receive anything for his services ; 
yet all are most willing and anxious to help strangers. 
The same liberal spirit seems to breathe through 
everything, and was equally shown at our little posada 
(inn) at Elche, . . . where a number of maimed, 
blind, and halt collected daily to receive the broken 
viands from the table-d'hote, which the mistress dis- 
tributed to them, and in the delicate blacksmith's 
wife opposite, who keeps two lamps burning nightly, 
at her own expense, before the little shrine of ' Our 
Lady of the Unprotected' in her balcony. The 
temporal works of mercy — to give bread to the 
hungry, and drink to the thirsty, to take care of 
the sick, to visit prisoners, and to bury the dead ; 
these are the common duties which none shrink 
from." 

"As I write, a handsome, dark-eyed, brown boy, 
in rags, who looks as if he had stepped out of one of 
Murillo's pictures, is leaning against the opposite 
wall in the moonlight, watching a shrine of the Virgin. 
It is a picture typical of Spain, ruined and super- 
stitious, but still most beautiful ; and so is the cry of 
the watchman, which is ringing through the silent 



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78 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



air, 1 Ave, Maria Santmima / it is a quarter to twelve 
o'clock!'"* 

Ah! give us back this superstition, this living 
faith rather which built up Spain and Portugal, till 
they were the wonder of Christendom. The ruin of 
the Peninsula is coeval, step by step, with the decline 
of that glorious spirit of " superstition." But we 
can pardon this perversion of judgment in a Protes- 
tant who has the eyes to see and the heart to ap- 
preciate so much that is beautiful in Catholic cus- 
toms. 

It is well known, that from time immemorial the 
sovereigns of Spain visited the hospitals nearest to 
the royal residence once, at least, every year. The 
rule is to go there with the entire court On enter- 
ing the sick ward, royalty at once goes to the nearest 
bed, and humbly kisses the hand of the poor patient. 
Then sovereigns and courtiers wait on the si^ per- 
forming in their behalf the most menial servLco, and 
addressing the sufferers with as much reverence as 
if they beheld the God of Calvary or the Divine 
Babe of Bethlehem visibly present in every sick-bed. 

THE LEPROUS INFANT OARED FOR BY ELIZABETH 07 
HUNGARY. 

Is not this the significance of a most beautiful 
legend from the life of St. Elizabeth of Hungary P 
Her mother-in-law, Sophia, was, at the time of the 
occurrence about to be related, bitterly prejudiced 
against the saintly wife. " She neither shared nor 
approved Elizabeth's charities and merciful ministra- 

* Hare : "Wanderings in Spain," v„ pp. 83, 84. 



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THE LEPROUS INFANT CABKD FOB* 



79 



tions: In her son, however, she found no sympathy. 
Yet one account shows how even his kind heart was 
overtasked. One day a child afflicted with leprosy 
was brought to the hospital in the Wartburg ; but 
his state was such that even the most courageous at- 
tendants in the institution would neither touch him 
nor admit him. Elizabeth, coming at her usual 
hour, no sooner beheld the little sufferer lying help- 
less and forsaken at the gate, than she took him up 
in her arms, carried him to the castle, and placed him 
in her own bed." 

" Sophia, indignant, flew to the landgrave. * My 
son, 9 she burst forth, * come with me instantly, and 
see with whom your wife shares your bed and she 
led him to his chamber, relating, in exaggerated lan- 
guage, the extraordinary occurrence that seemed to 
crown all the mad acts of his wife's charity. The 
landgrave, though he said not one word, could 
scarcely conceal his irritation and loathing. He 
snatched the coverlet from the bed, and lo / instead o 
the leper, there lay an infant, surrounded with a halo of 
light, and bearing the features of the new-born babe of 
Bethlehem.'"* 

This example is, however, more admirable than 
imitable. It is a rare thing to have to perform 
heroic acts of any virtue, even that of charity. Where 
a miracle occurs, as here, Providence means to in- 
culcate a lesson. The teaching, to the Catholic mind, 
is a plain one: it is only the repetition, under a 
different form, of the Master's doctrine, that he is 

• " Heroio Women of the Bible and the Church," c xxxiii. 
pp. 349, 360. 



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80 THE MIEEOB OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



represented by the persona of the poor and the suf- 
fering. 

So, with this conviction firmly seated in the soul 
of the Christian mistress of a household, it will be 
easy for her to see with what reverence and generosity 
she must treat the poor. We say " reverence." For 
if her womanly heart has schooled itself to behold 
Christ present in every one of the needy who come 
to her door, she will not have to be reminded to show 
to all, without exception, kindness. Kindness is 
something far beneath reverence ; yet let us insist 
upon the absolute necessity of kind looks and kind 
words. No one better than a woman knows how far 
kindness goes, or how much and how long a kind 
word or a look of tender sympathy will be treasured 
up by those on whom they are bestowed. If you have 
nothing else to give, if your purse is empty, and 
your bread has failed, open the spring of kindness 
in your heart, and let it pour out on the hearts of the 
poor sweet words of compassion, often more needed 
and more rarely bestowed than food on the famishing, 
or cold w ater on the faint and weary. 

Follow the rule of the great St. Francis, therefore : 
Be invariably and unfailingly hind to the poor. And 
this precious quality in the temper and bearing of 
man or woman can only be secured by the habitual 
practice of that " reverence * just mentioned. It is 
more needful than ever that in every Catholic home 
mothers should cultivate that ancient respect for 
husband and children which was inspired by a lively 
faith, and made every member of the Christian com- 
munity view in his fellow-Christians the children of 
God, the person of Christ Himself. This feeling in- 



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TEX CHARITABLE PEASANT- GIRL . 



81 



spired the father of the great Origen — a father found 
soon afterwards worthy to die the death of the 
martyrs — with a reverence for his infant son so deep 
and so sincere that he was wont, as he passed his 
cradle, to uncover the child's breast and to kiss it 
kneeling, knowing, as he said, that the babe was the 
living temple of the Holy Ghost. 

Surely, Catholic fathers and mothers ought to find 
an exquisite pleasure in such elevating thoughts and 
sentiments as this ; surely they should so consider 
each other, and respect each other, as if they too 
were chosen vessels, vessels of grace, bearing about 
in their bosoms the Creator Spirit ; and most surely 
ought it to be the mother's chief delight to reverence 
in every child of hers a something far more holy, 
more precious than the chalice used in the Holy 
Sacrifice, or the sacred vessel shut up in the Taber- 
nacle, and in closing Christ's divinest gift to our 
souls. 

Can we school and accustom ourselves so to 
reverence the poor as to see in them the person of 
Him who is represented as evermore standing in the 
night, wet by the dew or the rain-storm, at the door 
of every one of us, and gently knocking for admis- 
sion to the light and warmth of our fireside ? 

This said, it is not our design to say either to the 
wealthy or to the needy housewife what measure she 
is to follow in relieving the wants of the poor. 

THE CHARITABLE PEASANT-GIRL. 

In our own days we find in Catholic countries most 
illustrious examples of unbounded charity among the 
poorest classes of labourers. AtSt. Etienne-la-Varenne, 
7 



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82 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

in the south-east of France, lived a country girl, 
named Magdalen Saulnier. " Pious from her cradle, 
she used to distribute every day to the neighbouring 
poor part of the provision that she received for herself 
to take into the fields ; though of a weak constitution, 
she used to walk long distances to visit other poor 
and give them alms, which she had begged from the 
rich. During fifteen years she supported in this 
manner a poor blind man and his idiot daughter, 
daily visiting them, though they lived a league and 
a half from her home. A poor woman afflicted 
with leprosy, in the hamlet of Grandes-Bruyeres, had 
no one during eighteen months to come near her but 
Magdalen, in whose arms she breathed her last. In 
1840, during the inundations of the Rhone, she nar- 
rowly escaped being drowned while conveying her 
daily provisions to another poor woman in the 
Grange-Macon ; and, when reproached for her im- 
prudence, she replied : ' "Why, what would you have 
me to do ? I had not seen her the day before.' In 
the depth of winter, in 1835, she had discovered a 
poor woman, named Mancel, living far away in a hut, 
more like a wild beast's den than a human habita- 
tion. This poor creature was ill, and Magdalen 
would not leave her alone. Towards the close of a 
long night, a thick snow covering the ground, she 
lighted sticks, which caused so great a smoke that 
she opened the door to let in fresh air, when a wolf 
stood ready to dispute with Death its prey. It re- 
quired all her efforts, aided only with a large stone, 
to keep the door closed against the furious animal, 
which howled and struggled for entrance till the 
dawn. Some hours after, the woman expired. Then 



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THE OHAEITABLE PEASANT - GIRL. 



83 



Magdalen, fearing that the wolf would return, took 
up the body on her shoulders, and carried it to the 
house of the nearest peasant, who received it till the 
burial took place."* 

What an example is here — in this poor girl, whose 
whole life was consumed in the incredible hardships 
of a field-labourer — for the wives and daughters of 
our labouring classes in town and country. There 
is not a narrow street, crowded with tenement houses, 
in any one of our large cities, nor a manufacturing 
population in any of our great industrial centres, 
in which every woman who reads these pages cannot 
find some poor mother burdened with a family who 
is always busy in doing good around her to those 
poorer and more burdened than herself ; some factory- 
girl, sparely clad and poorly fed, who is an angel of 
good counsel, comfort, and all manner of help to her 
companions. Travellers over a sandy and treeless 
waste often chance upon green and shady spots rising 
like islands of the blessed in the midst of an ocean 
of death and desolation. When they come to ex- 
amine what has made these fairy spots so beautiful, 
they find a spring of living water gushing up from 
the bosom of the earth, overflowing its native spot, 
causing the grass to grow, and the shrub to flower, 
and the tree to take root and thrive ; and thus the 
green carpet spreads round about that cool spring, 
and bird and beast and man himself hasten grate- 
fully to enjoy the shade, the refreshing waters, the 
loveliness and repose of the spot. Examine well, in 
these moral wastes, so frequent and so hideous amid 
our civilisation and our Christianity, what is the source 
* CompUum, b. iii., pp.265, 266. 



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84 



THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD 



of the sweet and sanctifying influences you discover in 
certain neighbourhoods : you will be sure to trace it 
to some womanly heart, in the poorest of hovels fre- 
quently, and not seldom in the coldest and most naked 
of garrets. 

FRENCH- CANADIAN WOMEN AND THE IRISH OBPHANS 
OF 1847. 

But let us point out, nearer home, some heroic ex- 
amples which we may hold up as a mirror to American 

womanhood. 

And rirst must be recorded here, by one who was 
an eye-witness of what he relates, and before the 
generation which beheld it has passed away, one of 
the sublime6t instances of Christian charity known to 
ancient or modern times. New York and Quebec 
have not yet forgotten the Irish famine of 1846-7 
and its terrible consequences. But it is with the latter 
city in particular that this narrative has to deal. 
Fearful as had been all through the fall and winter 
of 1846 the tidings borne to America about the priva- 
tions endured by a whole famishing people, and the 
mortality caused by fever and other attendant 
diseases, but little apprehension was felt in Canada 
when navigation opened with the early spring. 
Consequently nothing like adequate preparation was 
made by the local authorities either at the quarantine 
station below Quebec, or at any of the usual landing- 
places along St. Lawrence. 

The result of this want of forethought was terrible 
botfi for the thousands of wretched immigrants cast 
all of a sudden on our shores, and for the population 
among whom the poor fevered victims carried, 



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MEMORABLE CHARITY OF FRENCH-CANADIANS. 85 

whithersoever -they went, the seeds of pestilence. 
The quarantine station on Grosse Isle, below Quebec, 
became a hot-bed of the most virulent typhus 
fever, and almost all the priests who were called in 
turn to minister to the spiritual wants of the 
crowded sick on ship and shore, caught the disease, 
many of them dying, and the others carrying disease, 
death, and dismay back with them to their 
parishes. In the city of Quebec itself but compara- 
tively few ravages were committed by this dreaded 
" ship-fever the steamers which conveyed the 
healthier immigrants to Montreal and the upper St. 
Lawrence not being permitted to land. In Montreal, 
however, and in Kingston and Toronto their arrival 
and passage were marked by a fearful mortality. In 
the first-named city, Bishop Bourget, his coadjutor, 
Bishop Prince, his vicar-general, and some thirty 
priests were stricken down by the plague. The semi- 
nary of St. Sulpice alone lost eight of its members. 
Bishop Power of Toronto fell a victim to it, and its 
ravages were such, during the early summer, that 
they far outstripped those of the cholera. 

Of course thousands upon thousands of orphans 
were left behind— and that, too, at a time when to 
give them a refuge in any home in town and country 
appeared to be bringing certain death into the family. 
Yet — and this is what must redound to the eternal 
honour of the French- Canadian population of the 
present province of Quebec — not only was there no 
hesitation manifest in adopting these little cast- 
aways, but at the voice of their bishops and priests 
the people of the country parishes vied with each 
other in their zeal to share their homes with them. 



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86 



THE MIRROR OF TRTJB WOMANHOOD. 



THE WIPE OF A SHIP- CARPENTER A MINISTERING 
ANGEL OF MERCY. 

One crowning instance must be selected ere we 
close this chapter, to demonstrate what womanly 
hearts can and will effect for the suffering and the 
needy. It is November in Quebec, in that same 
memorable year 1847, and November had set in 
with unusual severity. The country parishes all 
round had each received its colony of Irish orphans 
or young girls, who were adopted by the excellent 
farmers. Still the temporary asylums in Quebec 
attached to St. Patrick's church remained overcrowded: 
no provision had been, made for their sustenance 
during the long winter which was setting in so 
fiercely ; and local charity, it was feared, had been 
oxhausted by the extraordinary drain of the pre- 
ceding six months. 

At a meeting of ladies it was resolved that the 
most zealous would go by sub-committees of twos 
and threes into all the neighbouring parishes, and 
knock at every door to exhort every family to adopt 
one of the many hundreds of homeless waifs left 
behind by the retiring tide of disease and wretched- 
ness. Women's tongues are eloquent when fired by 
such a cause; they were welcomed everywhere, and 
a day was fixed when the orphans should be brought 
to St. Patrick's church, and all who wished to add 
one more stranger to their family circle were to go 
there and make their choice. 

So, on the day appointed, the ferries from Point 
Levi and the Island of Orleans were early crowded 
with farmers' wives and daughters, while along the 



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THE LITTLE DEFORMED FINDS A MOTHER.. 87 

roads from St. Foye and Beauport, Charlebourg and 
Lorette, the vehicles of the country people streamed 
into the city as to some great public festival. 

It was near noon, and in the house of a French- 
Canadian ship-carpenter, out near the banks of the 
S tCharles Eiver, at the extremity of the St. Eoch 
suburb, the cheerful, active mother of six children 
■was just concluding her morning's labour, sending 
off her oldest girl with the father's dinner to the 
ship-yard, leaving her infant nursling with a kind 
neighbour, and then hurrying away, a distance of 
full two miles, to Patrick's church. She had been 
delayed, in spite of her utmost exertions, and her 
only feeling, as she almost ran along the road, was 
one of fear lest she should be too late at the church 
and miss the piiz3 which she had promised her 
husband to bring home to himself and their dear 
ones. 

The silent, empty streets through which she passed 
on nearing the church made her heart sink within 
her ; and as she entered St. Patrick's there was no 
one there but a few good old souls telling their 
beads before the altar, and some soldiers of the gar- 
rison performing the "Way of the Cross." The 
tears filled her eyes as she knelt a moment in adora- 
tion; and then she hastened to explore the two 
large sacristies behind the church. They were 
empty! As she passed through the lower one, 
what she deemed a stifled sob struck her ear; but 
the distant corner whence it seemed to issue was 
very dark, and her eyes were still half -blinded by 
the brilliant sun outside and the glare of the snow. 
So, in her excitement, she heeded not the sound, but 



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B8 THB MIHEOR OF TRtfE WOMANHOOD. 

crossed the court-yard to the rectory and knocked 
timidly at the door. The servant, on opening, saw 
this good woman in tears, and scarcely able to 
articulate one word. At length she gasped out, 
" The orphans ? " " The orphans, ma'am?" replied 
che other; " there are none here!" "Where are 
they V 9 "All gone — all taken away by the ladies." 
" Have you kept none that you might let me have ?" 
" No, indeed," was the answer ; and with this the 
poor woman turned away with a heavy heart. As 
she entered the lower sacristy on her way to the 
church, her ear was again struck with the sound of 
sobbing, and coming this time more audibly from 
the distant dark corner. She was there in a moment ; 
and bending, or rather kneeling down, she distin- 
guished a female child, with its head between its 
hands, sobbing and moaning piteously. 

It was a little girl, some five years old, who on 
the voyage out had lost father and mother, brothers, 
sisters — all! The little thing, naturally a very 
beautiful child, had had in succession fever, dysen- 
tery, and smallpox ; and beneath this complication 
she had almost sunk. She had partially lost the 
use of her lower limbs, and had been frightfully 
disfigured. In the church, whither she had been 
brought early in the morning with the other orphans, 
the charitable women had invariably passed her by, 
choosing, as was natural, the most comely children 
for their adopted ones — and the sensitive slighted 
little thing sobbed so piteously that she was taken 
to the sacristy in order not to disturb the proceedings 
in the church. There she had sat in the corner, 
sobbing herself to sleep, and had been forgotten 



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THE LITTLE DEFORMED FINDS A MOTHER. 89 

when the crowd left the church. So as the opening 
of the sacristy door a moment ago had roused the 
forlorn one from her somnolency, she had looked up 
at the stranger coming in with a revival of hope, 
and a sob escaped her as the latter passed out by 
the opposite door. Once more hiding her face in her 
hands, she wept and sobbed with increased bitter- 
ness, as if the ittle wounded heart within would 
burst her chest. 

And thus the good carpenter's wife found her, as 
she knelt in the gloom by her side. " What is the 
matter, dear child ?" she said, with infinite tender- 
ness in her tone. " Who has left you here ? Speak 
to me, my dear !" she went on, as she removed the 
hands from her face. The child looked up through 
her scalding tears at the sweet sound of that motherly 
voice, and all was plain to the speaker. The face 
thus revealed was so disfigured that the woman drew 
back involuntarily. But recovering herself instantly, 
and, as she expressed it, indignant at her own 
cowardice, she extended both arms lovingly to the 
weeper : " Kiss me, darling," she said, as her own 
tears flowed fast, " kiss me, come to my heart ; don't 
be afraid ; I'm your mother now." And she folded 
her in her embrace, covering her face and head with 
tears and kisses. The ship-carpenter's family pos- 
sessed a blessed treasure that night. 

No, this is not extraordinary charity : great hearts, 
like that of that noble woman, abound everywhere 
among our labouring people. 0 women, who read 
these lines, remember, that your charity, your 
generosity will find in your everyday ordinary life 
rich opportunities for their exercise. Never neglect 



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90 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



any occasion God sends you of doing the good you 
can. Great charity, like every other great virtue, 
does not consist in doing extraordinary things, or 
waiting for extraordinary circumstances : it depends 
on our doing, with all our heart, the good we have 
the chance of doing at every moment within our own 
homes, and outside of them. 



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THE WIFK'b CBOWNING DUTY. 



91 



CHAPTER VII. 

THE WIFE'S CROWNING DUTY— FIDELITY. 

• • • * 

Vt not junxit amor, nostro sic parta labor* 
Unaninus animot operit una domut. 

As us love joined, so by our toil acquired, 
One-minded souls one mansion oovereth. 

Ancient inscription on a French house'. 

" Do you know where you are ! Do you know that this is the house of a 
man rich in virtue T . . .Do you know that these marbles, these 
stones, these paternal ceilings, represent the ancient honour and the 
venerated virtue of the family ! The house of my father is the centre of 
loyalty, and the sanctuary of honour.*'— Alarion. 

The home is the nursery of the nation, and the deep 
and sacred love that binds into one existence the 
hearts and lives of husband and wife is the soul of 
the home life. Everything which tends to lessen, to 
divide, to sully that sacred union of hearts, strikes at 
the very life of the family, and aims at upsetting the 
foundations of the moral world. 

The sacred virtue, the immaculate honour of every 
family, is inseparable from the purity and perpetuity 
of the love pledged to each other by both parents ; 
more especially, in universal estimation, is the family 
honour dependent on the inviolable fidelity of the 
mother towards him to whom she gave her early 
love. 

Hence the deep significance of the prayer of the 



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1>2 THE MIRROR OP THUS WOMANHOOD. 

Church in the solemn ceremony of marriage. She who 
had proposed to the imitation of all wives the undi- 
vided and unalterable love which she ever bears to 
Christ, her Spouse, who gives them in her inviolable 
and eternal fidelity to Him, to his honour and interest, 
the model of the true woman's unwavering f sus- 
tained, and devoted fidelity to her husband, makes 
of this notion the central point in her magnificent 
marriage ritual. 

Throughout all ages known to history, the most 
refined peoples have looked upon the ring as the 
symbol of eternity — as the proper emblem, therefore, 
of the union of souls underlying the matrimonial 
contract. 

THE RING SYMBOLIC OP ETERNAL FIDELITY. 

When the Church has witnessed and sanctioned 
by her blessing the mutual and solemn pledge given 
by bride and bridegroom, she proceeds to bless a 
ring, which is given to the bride as a symbol and 
seal of the union into which she has entered, and of 
the enduring fidelity with which she is to feed the 
sacred fire of mutual affection and to watch over the 
honour of her hearth- stone. 

" Bless, 0 Lord, this ring," such is the prayer, 
" which we bless in thy name, in order that she who 
wears it, by preserving unbroken fidelity to her 
husband, may continue in peace and the accom- 
plishment of thy will, and also ever live in mutual 
charity." 

Where the beautiful ceremonial is carried out in 
its intended fulness, the nuptial benediction is fol- 
lowed by the offering of the adorable sacrifice. 



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THE BINQ SYMBOLIC OF ETERNAL FIDELITY. 93 

Christ comes down on the altar, who so loved the 
Church, his bride, that He " delivered Himself up for 
it, that He might sanctify it, cleansing it by the laver 
of water in the word of life, that He might present it 
to Himself a glorious Church, not having spot, or 
wrinkle, or any such thing, but that it should be holy 
and without blemi8h. ,, 

There, at that altar, and in that presence, kneel 
the two for whom the Saviour God comes down, his 
hands filled with blessings for these his children 
beginning life together, and his heart overflowing 
with untold treasures of grace, so needful to them 
on their pathway of pain and labour. 

But there is more than this : the Church breaks 
in on the most solemn portion of the liturgy — that 
between the consecration and communion — to pro- 
nounce a further blessing on the bride. Turning 
towards the newly-married, the priest, as if his hands 
were laden with the blessings brought from on high, 
and his lips touched with the hallowed fire to 
prophesy good things to the suppliants prostrate 
there, thus prays : 

" O God, who by thy might didst create all things 
out of nothingness; who, haviDg ordered the first 
stages of this universe, and made man to the image 
of God, didst make man's substance the principle of 
woman's being, that she should thus be his insepar- 
able companion, teaching us thereby that a union 
originating in such unity may never be broken with- 
out crime; 0 God, who didst hallow this conjugal 
union by so surpassing a grace as to make the 
primitive nuptial alliance the prophetic figure of the 
mysterious union of Christ with the Church ; God, 



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94 THE MIRBOB OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

by whom woman is thus united to man, and the pri- 
mordial society thus formed is endowed with a bless- 
ing which alone survived the punishment of original 
sin and the judgment executed through the deluge; 
look down propitiously on this thy handmaiden, 
who, about to begin her companionship with her 
husband, beseeches Thee to grant her thy protection : 
in her may the yoke of love and peace ever abide ; 
faithful and chaste, may she wed in Christ, and be 
evermore the imitator of holy women; may she 
prove lovely to her husband, like Rachel ; wise, like 
Rebecca; long-lived and faithful, like Sara; may 
the fell Author of (Eve's) prevarication find no trace 
in her of the actions which He counsels ; may she be 
immovably attached to thy faith and law: the 
spouse of one man, may no other love ever touch 
her ; may she school and shield her own weakness 
by home-discipline : may she be modest and digni- 
fied, chaste and venerable, enlightened by wisdom 
from on high ; . . . may she win approval by 
her stainless life, and thus attain to the rest of the 
blessed and the heavenly kingdom."* 

THE WIFE'S HONOUR THE FOUNT OF ALL HONOUR. 

Pagans, in ancient times, were wont to attribute 
the origin of each mighty river to a peculiar deity ; 
so they built a temple at its head- waters, and there 
offered frequent sacrifice in order that the stream 
throughout its course to the ocean might be pure 
and healthful, and fraught with all manner of bless- 
ings to the lands it watered. 

* The Roman Missal in the " Nuptial Mass." 



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THE HONOUR OP FAMILIES GUARDED. 95 

This, like many other customs, was only the per- 
version of a deep religious truth. God has committed 
this earth, and all therein that is most beneficial to 
man, to the custody of those blessed spirits who, 
destined to be in eternity the fellow-citizens of men 
made perfect in glory, take delight in watching oyer 
their welfare, and being their companions in this 
life of trial. 

But if a perverse sentiment induced the heathen of 
old to consider as a something holy and divine the 
well-spring of mighty rivers, what must not a 
religion which comes from the true God think of 
the home which He destines to be the source of a race 
of men and women designed to be his own adopted 
children? What solemnity must the Church not 
employ to hallow that union, on the permanence and 
sacredness of which depend the honour, the un- 
spotted name, the greatness and happiness of a family 
throughout all succeeding generations ? 

Hence the inconceivable care with which the 
Church has, ever since the days of Christ — the second 
and truest Parent of mankind — watched over the 
unity and sacredness of that bond which makes of 
father and mother the one, sole, loving and beloved 
well-spring of the family existence, pride, and 
honour. 

IN WHAT THE WIFE'S FIDELITY CONSISTS. 

In the two preceding chapters we have insisted 
much on the qualities which enable a wife to be, in 
the fullest sense, the most delightful companion, the 
most efficient helpmate, the most trusted friend and 
confidante of her husband* All this she cannot be 



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96 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

without being at the same time most truly devoted 
to him in thought and affection, so that he alone, 
after God, fills her mind and her heart. 

We have touching examples of this inviolable 
fidelity, springing, in the first instance, from that 
single-hearted and absorbing love of a good husband 
which leaves no thought of any other love being 
possible ; and, in the second, from a wife's own high 
principle and fear of God, which keeps her true to 
the love she pledged, even when its object has 
become most unworthy, or, possibly, most hateful. 

FIDELITY ILLUSTRATED. 

In the patriarchal ages before Abraham, in the 
age of Noe and those preceding the flood, there was 
no question among the families of the blessed line of 
Seth of admitting a second wife into the family. 
That was characteristic of the evil brood of Cain — 
his son, Lamech, being mentioned as the first who 
had departed from the unity of the institution of 
marriage as it came from the hands of the Creator. 
But Seth, himself, and every one of the blessed 
descendants who kept alive on earth the primitive 
faith in Jehovah and the belief in the promised 
Redeemer, also maintained in their households the 
faith they had pledged to the wife of their youth. 
Though these men lived five hundred, six hundred, 
or even nine hundred years and more, their hearts 
were content with the love, and their lives filled with 
the fidelity, of that one woman : it was a sacred fire 
in these august patriarchal homes, burning undimmed 
century after century on the hearth-stone, an example, 



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jttdith's example. 



97 



even at this distance of time, deserving of the wonder 
and veneration of their degenerate descendants. 

Rebecca's fidelity prefigures that of the 

CHURCH. 

The violation of that unity by Abraham, even at 
the solicitation of his faithful Sara, was a manifest 
imperfection in him, who should have known better, 
and a want of faith and error of judgment in her, 
who had been brought up among the licentiousness 
of the Mesopotamian idolatry. But Abraham's son 
and successor, Isaac, and his bride, Rebecca, de- 
parted not from the great primitive law. For Isaac, 
who bore the wood of his sacrifice up the mountain- 
side, was the figure of Christ ; just like Isaac's early 
and only love, Eebecca, brought to him so wondrously 
from afar, was the type of the Church. 

It is the love of both Rebecca and the Church that 
forms a model and a rule for every Christian wife. 

judith's example. 

We have nearer to us in the Old Testament history 
other touching examples of fidelity in wives to the 
husband of their youth. Judith the Deliverer, " the 
Joy of Israel," the glory and honour of her people, 
was widowed young, and, though surpassingly 
beautiful and most wealthy, she remained true to 
the memory of her husband, inviolably faithful to 
the love she had plighted to him. The sudden 
inspiration which came to her to offer herself to the 
admiring eyes of the Assyrian general, was no devia- 
tion from the law of fidelity which she had s^> 
8 



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98 THE MIREOK OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

scrupulously followed till then. She trusted to God's 
angel to keep her honour safe in the Assyrian camp, 
and, as she afterwards declared, he had watched over 
her coming and going till she had struck the blow 
which freed her country. The victory once won, and 
the national thanksgiving over, she put off her rich 
robes, resumed her sober widow's weeds, buried her- 
self once more in the solitude of her own house, and 
gave up the half-century of life which remained to 
her to prayer, fasting, alms-deeds, and the cherished 
worship of her husband's memory. 

ANNA THE PROPHETESS. 

So it is with that remarkable woman whom we 
meet with in the temple at our Lord's presentation 
therein, Anna the Prophetess. She, too, had been 
left a widow after seven years of companionship 
with her husband, and "she was a widow till 
fourscore and four years, who departed not from 
the temple, by fasting and prayers, serving night 
and day." 

She was rewarded by beholding in the flesh the 
Eedeemer promised to Adam and Eve in the garden, 
and whose glory, like the first fires of sunrise above 
the eastern hills, patriarchs and prophets had only 
looked on " from afar." She was also privileged to 
see in the temple the Mother most blessed, who was 
prefigured by Eve as well as by Judith. 

These are only landmarks on the glorious pathway 
of true womanhood, pointing out in the inspired 
writings the honour paid to fidelity, and the reward 
bestowed on it even in this life. 



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IDEAL UNITY AND ETERNITY OF CONJUGAL LOYE. 

They teach, this lesson, at all events: That the 
purest and greatest of women considered the love 
which they had given to the husband of their youth 
as a something so sacred, a gift so divine, that they 
c#uld allow no other love to intrude upon it ; they had 
meant it to last for all time and for all eternity, and 
as such they cherished it, even when their loved com- 
panion had been taken early away from them. 

There is no doubt that this ideal eternity and unity of 
conjugal love is that upheld and blessed by the Church. 

But what is of the deepest practioal importance is, 

FIDELITY TO THE LIVING. 

Of this we have most touching examples all through 
the pages of Christian history. Nor is it necessary 
to insist at length upon this, where matrimonial 
unions are well assorted, and where, on both sides, 
there is the fear of God, a love blessed of Him, and 
all the charities of the home-life ever fed by the 
reception of the sacraments. It is where a union is 
ill-assorted, unhappy, and where, particularly, the 
husband happens to be anything or everything save 
what the wife, in her innocent dreams of goodness and 
manliness, conceived as the real oharacter of her lover. 

It is in the home where these dreams have been 
succeeded by a sad awakening, where the ideal 
sought after and loved turns out to be a hideous 
spectre, and where the idol the bride worshipped so 
sincerely has been dashed to pieces on the hearth- 
stone, that the young wife needs to look up to God, 
to call on his Name, to seek for his grace in order 



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100 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



to be true to him and to herself, in spite of the 
terrible deception of which she is the victim. 

Let us give, first, a few pregnant rules, which may 
serve for all, whether happy or otherwise ; we shall 
afterwards point out to the unhappy and sorely tried 
the only road on which they can find salvation. 

RULES. 

A cardinal principle in home life is, never to allow 
one's self to suspect or to distrust one's dear ones, 
save only when the evidence of guilt or unworthiness 
is irresistible. Even then the terrible truth must be 
kept secret from every living soul ; it is only when 
absolutely necessary, and in an extremity, that a 
wife should mention it, though never so guardedly, 
to an experienced and holy guide. From one's 
relatives on both sides, from father or mother, brother 
or sister, the secret should be strictly and sacredly 
kept, so long as the reformation and salvation of the 
guilty one, or the protection of one's children, or 
some such weighty consideration, does not compel one 
to speak so much of the truth as is needful. 

KEEP YOUR FAMILY TROUBLES TO YOURSELF. 

It is impossible for a wife to be too reserved on 
this point : it would be fatal to seek confidants even 
in one's nearest and dearest. Where conscience is 
concerned, extreme care should be taken, both in 
choosing the person to be consulted, and in the 
manner in which the communication is to be made. 
Even a father, if he be a man of wisdom, experience, 
and high principle, will rarely encourage a married 
daughter to make him her confidant in her secret 



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THE FRIENDSHIPS BANEFUL TO FIDELITY. 101 

troubles. If he has been a good husband, blessed 
with a good wife, his own heart will have taught 
him how jealous a husband is of seeing any man 
made his wife's confidant. 

There must be extreme necessity, then, to justify 
a wife in revealing her troubles to priest or to father, 
even with all the reservations made above. To make 
a confidant, even of a brother, is most unwise, under 
any but very extraordinary circumstances ; but to go 
with one's troubles to a stranger, be he what he may, 
is to court danger, and to go more than half way to 
meet ruin. 

If confidence given to persons of the opposite sex 
is fraught with such certain peril, how much more so 
is friendship ? 

THE FRIENDSHIPS BANEFUL TO FIDELITY. 

Lady friends and lady confidantes unwisely chosen, 
and kept in spite of a husband's remonstrances, have 
destroyed the peace of many a home where there was, 
otherwise, every element of happiness, sincere mutual 
affection, companionship, and faith in each other's 
virtue. But gentlemen friends, where a wife is so 
bereft of sense, of discernment, of womanly tact, as 
to permit such a monstrosity to come into her life — 
gentlemen friends are the worst enemies of her honour, 
her home, and the happiness of all belonging to her. 

If a wife be already happy in possessing a husband 
who fulfils her ideal of manliness, who is all in all to 
her, she does him the foulest wrong, and her own 
honour irreparable injury, in transferring to any 
man living any part of her affections. If, as we 
suppose, she loves her husband with her whole hear ti 



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102 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



how jealous would she feel of any woman on whom 
her husband would bestow anything like friendship ! 
Would she not resent it — and most justly — as a 
grievous wrong done to herself ? But she is not to 
forget that, in a family, a husband's friendships do 
not tend to bring dishonour on the children, like the 
aberrations of a mother's heart 

We cannot affirm it too strongly, the honour of 
families depends, chiefly, on a father's reputation and 
achievements ; the dishonour of families on the un- 
hallowed friendships of mothers. 

WHEN DANGER BEGINS. 

The greatest danger for the heart of the wife, till 
then blameless, unconscious, and unsuspicious of 
evil, arises in those seasons of deep domestic trouble, 
discord, and unhappiness. It is in these seasons of 
trial that a wife should go to the heart of the Cruci- 
fied for sympathy, light, and strength. Oh! if 
women whose hearts are sore, and whose troubled 
spirit yearns for consolation and counsel, only knew 
what light, and sweetness, and energy of soul can be 
found in one quarter of an hour's secret converse 
with the crucifix, that most eloquent of books and 
most enlightened of all counsellors and consolers ! 
If they could turn aside from the hollow and danger- 
ous sympathies of human friendship, even when least 
perilous, and betake them to the Divine Comforter, 
who evermore dwells on our altars, what a heart 
they would find there ! And how they would rise 
from before the Veil and the Mercy- Seat refreshed, 
strengthened, and resolved to take up their cross and 
follow Him! 



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How many of our purest, bravest, best, cannot 
put away from them the cross which is to be a life- 
long burden ! Bear it they must. If they refuse to 
carry it, the weight crushes them ; if they take it up 
willingly, joyously, as He did, it bears them forward, 
imparting to them an energy all divine, and heavenly 
joys amid all the bitterness of earthly trials ! 

CARRY TOUR CROSS AND IT WILL CARRY YOU. 

"We know such mourners, whose young lives have 
been blighted by a union with guilt, secret vice, 
and falsehood ; but who have taken up the cross with 
unflinching courage, determined to make of the ever- 
recurring trials and humiliations of each day a mine 
of merit with which to purchase the eternal joys. 
The pleasant and loved companionship about which 
their maiden dreams had been busy, had turned out, 
when viewed with carnal eyes, and judged in the 
light of this world's wisdom, nought else but being 
hopelessly tied to a loathsome leper. The love of 
suffering, to which, under the divine inspiration, the 
wife, on awakening from her dream, opened every 
avenue of her soul, is a divine companionship ; it is 
treading, with our thorn-crowned King, the bitter 
but glorious road of crucifixion. 

THE CHRISTIAN WOMAN IS BOUND TO BE 
SUPERNATURAL. 

This lesson addresses itself to Christian wives, to 
women bound to be Supernatural, who are supposed 
to have entered on their matrimonial engagements 
with supernatural motives (and the not doing so is 
the source of untold and inconceivable miseries), 
who profess to lead a supernatural life amid all the 



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104 THB MIBEOE OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

joys, the cares, the trials, and disappointments of 
their subsequent condition. Woe to them if they are 
not supernatural, and lovers of the cross, and the 
Crucified, when the fair and fond visions of earthly 
love requited vanish from their early path like the 
golden clouds of morning ! 

There is one book out of which every young wife, 
from her bridal day, would do well to read a daily 
chapter to her companion, " The Imitation of Christ ;" 
it is brimful of the Spirit of God. Would that the 
wife on whose life the shadow of the dreadful heart- 
trials hinted at here falls for the first-time, would 
take up this almost divine book, and read such 
passages as the following : — 

" 0 Lord God, Holy Father, be Thou now and 
forever blessed ! For, as Thou wilt, even so hath it 
been done to me ; and what Thou dost is good. 

" Let thy servant take joy in Thee, not in herself, 
nor in any other being. For Thou alone art true 
joy ; Thou art my hope and my crown ; Thou, O 
Lord, art my bliss and my honour ! 

" 0 Father, just, holy, and ever to be praised, the 
hour of trial is come for thy servant; 

" Father ever to be loved, it is right that in this 
hour thy servant should suffer somewhat for thy sake. 

" Father to be perpetually reverenced, the hour 
hath come which from all eternity Thou didst forsee 
as about to be sent to me, that thy servant should be 
outwardly borne, down, but should, interiorly still 
live unto Thee ; that she should be for a little time 
held of no account,' humiliated, and disappear from 
the sight of man ; that she should be crushed beneath 
the weight of suffering and helplessness ; in order 



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105 



that so she may rise as from the grave in the dawn 
of a new light, and be glorified in heaven. 

" Holy Father, so Thou hast appointed, and so 
willed, and this hath come to pass which Thou hast 
ordained. 

" For this is a favour to thy friend, that she should 
suffer and be afflicted in this world for the love of 
Thee, how often soever, by whom soever, and in what 
manner soever Thou permittest it to befall her."* 

THE CRUCIFIX AND " THE IMITATION OF CHRIST." 

What soul will not rise from the foot of the 
crucifix, after such a prayer as this, with the 
consciousness, the deep-seated conviction, that God 
with her and in her will enable her to face and over- 
come the trials before her ? 

It is time that in every Christian household inothers 
should inculcate the lesson, morning, noon, and 
night, that their children, both sons and daughters, 
never will be or can be anything, unless they study 
before and above all things else to be supernatural 
men and women. 

They must be that or they will become worse than 
pagans. 

But let us look into the mirror of a life tried by 
humiliations and sufferings such as no one of our 
readers (we may safely predict it) will ever be called 
on to endure, and we shall see therein how a brave 
womanly heart can^find courage to be the light and 
benefactress of a whole country, while that same 
heart is riven by the most terrible domestic griefs. 

• " Imitation of Christ," B. IH., c 1. 



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GLORIOUS EXAMPLES OF FIDELITY — THE CHILD-WIFE. 

We shall not give the names of the persons or the 
countries till our glorious tale be told, and the lesson 
hath sunk deep into the mind of the attentive reader. 

A child of thirteen, reared with the most extra- 
ordinary care, and responding by every excellence 
and grace of mind and heart to this most careful 
culture, our heroine was given in marriage to one 
much her elder, and who, to extraordinary qualities, 
added passions and vices which threatened to make 
him the scourge of all who depended on him. 

In his heart, sullied and wasted by lawless affec- 
tions, there was no room for anything like pure and 
true love for the beautiful, innocent, and artless 
child which policy had made his wife ; nor could an 
intellect dulled and clouded by unbridled sensuality 
even begin to understand a soul which was as un- 
conscious of evil in herself or in others as the babe 
newly born. 

So this child-wife was allowed to indulge amid her 
servants, in the beautiful home to which she had been 
brought, far away from her native country, all her 
tastes for piety and beneficence under every form, 
while her husband spent, during months and years, 
the leisure which should have been devoted to her 
in the most scandalous indulgence, and the most un- 
worthy companionship. 

The light only dawned on the forsaken and out- 
raged one by degrees. Hers was a most loving 
nature ; for a pure love is the deepest of all. But, 
as she had been reared in childhood under the 
especial care of a grandfather, whom three kingdoms 



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venerated as a living saint, she had been made to 
look upon offences towards the Divine Majesty as 
the supreme of evils, and the hideousness of sin as 
a something surpassingly loathsome. 

Though the knowledge of her husband's infidelity 
inflicted a wound so deep that her life was feared 
for, she never allowed one word of complaint or 
blame to escape her lips ; but she moaned unceas- 
ingly over the outrage done to God, and the scandal 
given to the people. She undertook, with the thought 
of turning away the divine anger from him, and from 
those subject to him, to expiate his guilt by protracted 
prayer, by austerities which her counsellors could 
not prevail on her to mitigate, and by all manner of 
alms-deeds and works of mercy. 

The hoary sinners who had encouraged or tolerated 
her husband's early wickedness, at first laughed at 
the young wife's innocence, simplicity, and evident 
ignorance of all moral evil ; but they were touched 
by the greatness of soul which knew not how to utter 
one word in blame of the guilt that dishonoured 
her home and her husband, and they were awed 
into veneration and love by the courage which 
resented so openly the injury done to the divine 
honour, and the splendid munificence that sought 
to make, of the poor and the suffering, intercessors 
between her offended God and her offending 
husband. 

He, too, was touched by the sweet and uncom- 
plaining sorrow of the injured wife. The sense of 
wrong had suddenly transformed her, and, in a day, 
she passed from the guilessness of a child to the 
majesty of a woman sensible to her wrongs. Yet, 



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THE MIBBOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



not a word or a look betrayed the terrible grief which 
was gnawing away her heart's core. 

The peerless flower of beauty and spotless purity 
which had been laid upon his bosom was drooping 
before his eyes ; the atmosphere of evil which sur- 
rounded him had blighted its freshness. He was 
conscience-stricken, and filled with reverence, if not 
yet with love, for the angelic creature of whom he 
deemed himself unworthy. 

His remorse gave her the hope that his heart was 
not dead. With the instinct of the true woman and 
the saint, which she was, she resolved to win that 
soul to God by patience, and by the irresistible 
power of prayer and charity. Of winning his love to 
herself she thought not. Thenceforward no oppor- 
tunity was lost of doing on every side all the good 
she could in favour of the sick, the poor, and the 
erring. The false friends and companions who 
pandered to her husband's vices, and shared in his 
criminal pleasures, were to her but a portion of the 
great host of the Evil One, leagued together to destroy 
men's souls, and blight all that was fairest on earth ; 
she was fain to enlist all she could under the banners 
of Goodness, which delighteth not so much in doing 
good as in making others good. And she was 
blessed. 

The hosts of the poor, the suffering, and the re- 
claimed who daily and nightly lifted up their prayers 
in union with hers, prevailed with heaven; and 
heaven's grace, aided by the growing splendour of 
the young wife's spiritual beauty, at length won the 
husband's heart. The conquest was, however, only 
a slow one. The habits of evil had cast roots too 



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109 



deep and too wide into that rich nature to permit 
them to be plucked up in a day, or to prevent their 
often cropping out at the surface in spite of the 
prudent wife's constant though gentle culture, and 
despite his own generous efforts at thorough amend- 
ment. The supernatural wisdom whioh sanctity 
bestowed on one so young as she was, taught her a : 
patient husbandry, both in eradicating inveterate 
evil, and in waiting for the growth of virtuous fruits. 
This, she knew, was the law in the natural world 
around her, and she also knew that a similar law 
regulated the supernatural life of souls. 

The day came, ere she had passed out of her early 
womanhood, when she was blessed with the certainly 
that her husband's heart was all God's and her own. 
Prom that hour her happiness was unspeakable, and 
her gratitude to the Author of all heavenly gifts 
showed itself in her increased fervour and joyousness, 
and in her unmeasured generosity towards the 
poor. From that hour also her husband lost no 
opportunity of proving to the world that he had 
determined to be in God's hand a docile and 
faithful instrument for every blessed purpose which 
his own conscience and the wisdom of his wife 
might counsel. 

Of all the men who ever wielded power in that 
ancient Catholic land, none achieved what he and his 
angel- wife thenceforward planned and accomplished. 
He died with the title of " Father of his Country,' 1 
given to him by the gratitude of his contemporaries, 
and confirmed by the admiration of after-ages. And 
she, his saviour, his better self, the prompter of every 
heroic and patriotic enterprise ? She needed not to 



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110 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

be called the mother of her country ; she became its 
patron saint and protectress, and the memory of her 
perfect life still helps to keep alive the light of faith 
and the flame of charity among the sad ruins of 
national greatness. 

Sorely tried as had been the fidelity of that young 
heart, it was not spared, even when happier days 
had begun to dawn for her, the most cruel pain that 
a faithful and sorely tried wife can endure. She was 
calumniated by her servants, and rashly suspected by 
her husband, but too prone to see the motives and 
actions of others in the light of his own guilty 
conscience. One most painful trial, in particular, is 
recorded by historians. A page, perhaps a relative, 
or the young son of some most noble family, who had 
commended himself to his mistress by uncommon 
piety and tenderness towards the sick and poor, was 
frequently employed on errands of mercy. This 
excited the enmity or malignity of some of his com- 
panions, men accustomed, in all likelihood, to serve 
their master's worst vices, and who felt themselves 

111 at ease in the chaste atmosphere that surrounded 
his lady. 

However the calumny was insinuated, it was but 
too readily believed, and the instant death of the 
supposed culprit was resolved upon. It was an age 
of violence, when might made law. But Providence 
interfered to save the innocent and punish the guilty. 
The calumniator perished by the hand of the assassin, 
and through the very device intended to take the life 
of his victim. The hand of God was visible. Other 
and more touching instances of miraculous interpo- 
sition are also recorded of the long period of heart- 



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trial through which the young wife had to pass. 
One and the same truth shines forth from all : she 
had placed her trust in God, and God is bound not 
to deceive those who trust in Him. 

And thus we come back to the moral purpose of 
our illustration. Let the wife whose eyes rest on 
these words, if Providence should ever permit her 
soul to be thus tried in the furnace, take well to 
heart these other words from the divine book already 
quoted : 

A DIVINE PRAYER. 

u Without thy counsel and providence, and without 
cause, nothing happeneth on earth. It is good for me, 

0 Lord, that Thou hast humbled me; that I may learn 
thy justifications (Ps. cxviii. 71) ; that I may cast away 
all pride of heart and presumption. It is for my 
profit that shame hath covered my face, that I may 
take Thee for my consoler rather than men. . . • 
There is not one among all who are beneath the 
heavens that is able to console me but thyself, 0 
Lord God, the heavenly Physician of souls, who 
strikest and healest, ' who bringest down to hell and 
leadest back again.' Thy discipline is upon me, and 
thy rod itself shall instruct me (Ps. xvii. 36). . . . 

" Behold, 0 beloved Father, I am in thy hands ; 

1 bow myself down under the rod of thy correction. 
. . . Myself, and all that are mine, I commit to 
Thee for chastening: it is better to be chastised 
here than hereafter. . . . Grant me, 0 Lord, to 
know what I ought to know ; to love what I ought 
to love ; to praise that which is most pleasing to Thee ; 
to esteem that highly which to Thee is precious ; and 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



to reject and despise what Thou deemest vile and 
worthless." * 

Such sentiments as these are like the fragrant air 
of the heavenly hills to one who has just passed 
through the valley of the shadow of death ; like the 
sudden brightness and warmth of sunlight to one long 
imprisoned amid the snows and darkness of an arctic 
region. But He, who guided the pen and warmed 
the heart of the man who wrote, them, will know, 
when you come to Him in your sore need, how to 
whisper far sweeter words than man can write ; for 
He made the heart, and knoweth where lie the springs 
of its weakness as well as of its power. 

THE VANITY WHICH LEADS TO DISHONOUR. 

"Would it not be a most ungracious act to darken 
these pages with a description, though never so brief 
and lightly shaded, of the home, whether rich or 
poor, ruined or made desolate by infidelity ? Better 
far, so our readers will think with us, to paint the 
heroic constancy and preternatural joys of the faith- 
ful wife ; faithful even while " the hungry fire with 
its caverns of burning light " was trying and search- 
ing every corner of her heart. 

Only let a priestly hand add, before concluding 
this most important chapter, a brief warning, and as 
brief an exhortation. 

H it be most true, and the voice of experience 
attests that it is, that the danger for the womanly 
heart, tried to its utmost by marital un worthiness, lies 
in the need of sympathy ; so, in happy homes, where 

• "Imitation of Christ," B. III., o. i. 



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there exists perfect love, and neither unsuitabilitynor 
disappointment, ruin comes from vanity, and from 
the appetite for display and enjoyment. 

THE HOME-PLEASURES WHICH ARE A SAFEGUARD 
TO HONOUR. 

Against this vanity .there is no remedy, apart 
always from the grace of the sacraments, and these 
aids which God may vouchsafe to some souls ; there 
is no remedy, we say, but in a wife's never seeking 
to please any other eye than that of her husband, or 
valuing any praise on dress, personal appearance, 
and accomplishment of any kind, but what falls from 
his dear lips, or caring for any amusement that is 
not shared by him ; or in wishing to have any theatre 
for the display of any gift, natural or acquired, how 
transcendent soever, save the bosom of one's own 
family. 

"We have heard of women, most gifted and most 
accomplished, who, blessed with a large family, and 
burdened with the care of a numerous household, 
made it a point of conscience to dress every day of 
their lives, even in extreme old age, with the greatest 
care, in order to please their husbands, and give them 
thereby an outward proof of undiminished love; 
and to please their children, by ever setting them an 
example worthy of imitation. With these admirable 
wives and mothers it had been a life-long study how 
to make their own gifts and accomplishments con- 
tribute daily to the delight of the family circle. 
Intellectual and artistic culture, music and song, and 
the charming illusions of private dramatic entertain- 

9 X 



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114 THE MIRROR OF TRTTB WOMANHOOD. 

menta, all was made to serve the one great purpose 
of rendering home the sweetest, brightest, dearest 
spot of earth. 

THE LOVE OF DISPLAY WHICH KNOWS NOT PERIL. 

One need not fear to display to the utmost within 
the home sanctuary, and for the delights of one's 
own dearest, every best gift of God ; the praise which 
comes from these dear lips is not that which intoxi- 
cates dangerously ; the vanity which such praise may 
create is not that which is to be dreaded by mother 
or by daughter; and the delicious satisfaction enjoyed, 
both by the delight a wife and mother gives, and by 
that which she receives in return, is not one which 
the good angels may look on with displeasure. 

On the contrary, the love of praise and display, 
which is so common and so natural in a certain 
measure, will find its lawful and most healthful 
satisfaction in these home-pleasures and celebrations ; 
in these lie the antidote or preservative against the 
vanity fraught with peril. 

Home-life, home-pleasures, home-virtues, in this 
respect, as in so many others, are the great means 
Providence employs, and religion counsels, to prevent 
or to counteract the tendencies towards finding one's 
only or chief distractions and enjoyments outside of 
home and the family circle. There are men who 
only sleep at home, and spend the remainder of their 
time outside of it. They cannot be said to have a 
home, or to have any conception of what a home is, 
or could be. If they are blessed with wives able and 
anxious to make their homes a paradise for them, 
Tphat shall we say of tbair folly or their guilt? And 



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who will pity them, if the home thus forsaken, and 
absolutely neglected by its appointed guardian, 
should become a prey to the Tempter ? 
. But of the women who only make their homes a 
brief breathing or resting-place in their unbroken 
and eternal round of vanity and dissipation, we need 
only say what everybody sees, that the curse is upon 
them, and that shame is ever flitting round their 
homes, like these legendary evil spirits that haunt 
the precincts of families doomed to perdition. 

To the nobility of true womanly natures we need 
not recommend to be watchful over the sanctity of 
the homes in which they are the priestesses of the 
family religion, the jealous guardians and loving 
teachers of the Ancestral Faith, and the custodians of 
that treasure, dearer and more precious to every home 
where God is feared, and men's good opinion is 
valued, than royal power or fabulous wealth, the 
peerless jewel — Honour. 

HONOUR, THE TREE OP LIFE OF THE HOME PARADISE. 

"When our first parents were thrust forth from 
paradise, they might have seen, as they turned to 
have one last look at what they had lost for ever, 
cherubim set there to guard its entrance, "and a 
flaming sword turning every way to keep the way of 
the tree of life." To you, 0 faithful women, who 
read this, be this truth welcome : Your paradise is 
your home, the tree of life is your honour, and from 
beneath its shade, from the sweet and safe centre of 
your bliss, you can look to the gate of your Eden, 
and see with the eyes of faith, as certainly as you see 
your own right hand, God's angels set to guard your 



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116 THE MIBEOB 07 TBUX WOMANHOOD* 

home, and the " flaming sword turning every way * 
to defend you and yours from evil. 

So, when evil, overleaping the walls of your 
sanctuary, would threaten to desecrate its holiness, 
and steal away its priceless treasures, remember the 
noble rebuke of the Spanish maiden to the invaders 
of her father's home: "Do you know where you 
are ? Do you know that this is the house of a man 
rich in virtue ? . • . The house of my father is 
the centre of loyalty, and the sanctuary of honour 1 99 




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CHAPTER VHI. 

THE MOTHER. 

When at some holy festival or ere the church, at nightfall, begins to be 
filled with confused steps and lighted tapers ; when, amidst the chant of 
men, and children, and women, a figure can be distinguished among all 
these, in a far recess, half obscured, having grouped around her, near the 
sombre wall, four young heads, on which she casts at times a look more 
sweet than solemn ;— oh, whoever you may be, bless her ! It is she, the 
sister, visible to the eyes of my immortal soul ; my pride, my hope, my 
shelter; the joy of my young years ; the hoped-for treasure of my age : it 
is she, the wife who has no joy but my happiness ; who, if my children or 
myself ever seem to totter on the brink, without a severe word or a re- 
proachful look, supports them with the hand, and me with the heart ; she 
to whom I have said always, and who has said to me : "through all! " 
It is she, in a word, a flower of beauty, which goodness has perfumed : the 
flower is of earth, and the fragrancy of heaven.— Quoted by Diqbt in 
Compitum. 

The above poetio picture presents the true woman in 
the twofold aspect of wife and mother, young still, 
and in the active discharge of her duties as such, and 
hence this quotation serves as an apt transition to 
the all-important subject which now solicits our 
deepest interest. The faithful love which clings to 
husband, home, and honour, "through all v — through 
the storm, the flame, and the sea of bitterness — will 
not be apt to omit one sweet duty of motherhood. 
Even when all her womanly virtues are powerless to 
exorcise the demon of evil from her household, there 
remains to her, in the discharge of her maternal 
office, an unfailing source of deepest consolation, as 
well as of merit before God and man. 



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And here it is, most especially, that it behooves 
woman to be supernatural, so that the result of her 
motherly labours shall be to make of her dear ones, 
men and women truly deserving the name of children 
of God. 

MEANING 07 THE TERM " SUPERNATUBAL," AS 
APPLIED HERE. 

When the word supernatural is used, the entire 
non-Catholic world, as well as a great many Catholics 
—even educated Catholics — are but too apt to entirely 
misapprehend its meaning. There is in the modern 
mind, particularly where the masses are not Catholic, 
a disposition to look upon whatever is supernatural 
as contrary to nature, and, therefore, absurd, or as 
miraculous, and therefore outside of the common 
laws of action, and beyond our ordinary reach. 

There is a general tendency to reject the super- 
natural order altogether, and to admit nothing as 
existing or possible but what is strictly in accordance 
with nature. 

This is not the place for a philosophical or theo- 
logical disquisition. But every mother will be glad 
to find, here, clear and simple notions enabling her to 
seize at a glance what the supernatural order is, and 
so to convey the light in her own mind to that of her 
children all through their training. 

Looking upon the human race as one great family 
composed of the descendants of the one father and the 
one mother, and considering them in their relation to 
God's government over them in this life and the life 
to come, we conceive that He who created them 




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MEANING 07 THE TERM " SUPEENATUHAL." 119 

could reward them, after death, in accordance with 
their degree of fidelity to the law of nature, written 
equally on the heart of the savage and on that of 
the civilised man. This would be the "natural 
order " in which God would impose upon men no 
duties beyond those of love, obedience, reverence, 
and worship to Himself; of the reciprocal obligations 
and duties which bind together husband and wife, 
parents and children, family to family; and towards 
the authorities lawfully acknowledged in civil society. 
The virtues of truthfulness, honour, honesty, and of 
the general brotherly charity which should make 
every man look upon all other men as his brothers, 
the reverence for justice in all one's dealings, and so 
many other virtues that need not be named, belong 
to the " natural order," and are inseparable from 
man's condition under God's providence. 

But the supernatural order, without doing away 
with a single one of these natural virtues, obligations, 
duties, and charities, considers man as belonging to 
a higher condition, to which, with all his natural 
powers, and virtues, and duties, he has been raised 
by the gratuitous love of his Creator. Man never 
could, in any supposition, have been created without 
being bound to his Maker by service in this life, by 
charity and justice towards his fellow-men, and by 
the retribution of the immortality following after 
such service and fellowship. But God was not 
content to leave man in this essential condition of 
mere natural service, fellowship, and charity: He 
raised him to the rank of his own adopted child, im- 
parted to his mind a distinct knowledge of this 
glorious destiny, to his heart sentiments and energies 



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120 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

enabling him to live up to it ; added to man's natural 
duties, obligations, and virtues, new aims, new obli- 
gations, a higher charity ; a new ideal of goodness 
and greatness, and generosity ; — all looking forward to 
an eternal fellowship with God, in his own inner life, 
in the world to come. 

Thus the supernatural order is that in which God 
stands in the relation of Father to us, in which we 
hold the rank of his real adopted children, with all 
the sentiments, obligations, rights, honours, and 
graces attendant on this sublime elevation, all tend- 
ing to the possession of that glory of the life to come, 
the Beatific Vision, the seeing God face to face, the 
being taken into society with the Three Infinite 
Persons of the Godhead, and into fellow-citizenship 
with his angels. 

This adoption, this divine rank, these graces given 
in this life to mind and heart, and this unspeakably 
glorious and blissful fellowship of eternity, is a some- 
thing so far above nature, so undue to it, so entirely 
beyond its requirements and capacities, that it is 
deservedly called "supernatural," that is, above and 
beyond nature. 

HOW THE CHILD MUST BE MADE ACQUAINTED WITH 
THE SUPERNATURAL ORDER. 

To inculcate on her children, as soon as their 
reason begins to dawn, that God is not only their 
Maker, as He is that of the heavens above them and 
the earth around them, but also to them a true 
Father, who cares for them, and gives them a right 
to the most magnificent of all inheritances, must be 
one of the Christian mother's early cares. Her own 



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sense of piety, her womanly wit, and instinctive 
knowledge of child-nature will teach her the best 
methods to be employed in order to let in by degrees, 
and one after the other, the beautiful and divine 
realities of the supernatural order, of that kingdom 
of God whose sovereign is true Father to us, of that 
glorious world in which Christ and his Blessed 
Mother are central figures. 

There are few households so poor but they can 
afford to have one or two sweet prints representing 
the mysteries of our Lord's infancy and childhood, as 
well as a handsome crucifix, or, at least, a good print 
of the crucifixion. It is well to reject the abomin- 
able daubs published in our large cities, and " mis- 
representing 99 every subject they profess to set 
before the devout mind. The sweet pictures of the 
Blessed Mother and her Babe, by Luini, or Fra 
Bartolomeo, and Crucifixions by such religious 
painters as Velasquez, cannot fail to produce a 
powerful impression. There are good engravings of 
them, for which it would be well to pay a little more ; 
good chromos, like those published in London by the 
Arundel Society, are, unfortunately, beyond the 
reach of poor families. Would that we had, both in 
city and country parishes, some sodality interested in 
seeing that the homes of the labouring classes were 
provided with such objects of religious art as would 
inspire reverence and piety in the beholder. Nor 
must mothers forget to have a little statue or a print 
of the Angel Guardian ; he is a friend to be known 
and loved early. 

It must be the part of the judicious mother to ex- 
plain in due time to her little ones, when they uro 



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THE MIBEOB 07 TET7E WOMANHOOD. 



able to inquire about that heavenly Woman and her 
Babe, what relation they both bear to us. Some 
mothers, we know, have in their nurseries, " The 
Flight into Egypt," or the " Adoration of the Magi," 
subjects which will naturally oblige the children to 
inquire about the birth of the Divine Babe, and the 
whole story of his birth. 

When, precisely, parents can draw the affection of 
the child-mind to the story of the Passion, and the 
Crucifix, they alone can determine. Some are averse 
to doing so before children are a little more advanced 
in years. Certain it is that they should be made 
acquainted with the sufferings of our Divine Bene- 
factor before they emerge from childhood. This 
point of time being left to the judgment of mothers, 
let us be firmly convinced that of all the vehicles of 
supernatural instruction and solid piety there is no 
one more efficacious than 

THE CRUCIFIX. 

The Crucifix in Catholic households is not only the 
most eloquent and instructive of books for youth and 
old age ; but it can also be made to speak divinely to 
the sense of childhood. Children are all athirst for 
knowledge once they begin to speak and to be 
capable of instruction by word of mouth. Their 
mind and imagination are forcibly impressed by the 
figure of the Man of Sorrows nailed to the bitter 
tree. They are quick to seize the reverence, the 
love, the worship with which a mother or a nurse 
looks upon this pregnant story of Love Crucified. 
Who is He ? What brought Him there ? What He 
is to us ; what we owe Him, hope and fear from 



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123 



Him, are lessons which a child may soon learn, for 
they are questions which arise in his own mind, and 
to which he is impelled to seek an answer by a 
Prompter within him. 

For Christian mothers should not forget that in 
the infant soul dwells the Divine Spirit, communicated 
in baptism, and never expelled thence save by volun- 
tary mortal sin. In the soul of every mother, too, 
who is in a state of grace, dwells the same Divine In- 
structor, prompting her to do her duty by her child, 
and pledged to aid her in her work. 

THE DIVINE SPIRIT'S 8HARE IN THE WORK OF 
EDUCATION. 

Surely it must be a consolation and an encourage- 
ment to the mother to know that in this laborious 
but sweet work of forming each mind and heart under 
her care, she is doing God's own most blessed work, 
in which she has a right to count on his most effective 
and continual co-operation. 

In imparting instruction, in forming the minds and 
hearts of her dear ones, the mother only does one 
part of God's work ; He takes on Himself to do the 
other and the most important part. This she must 
rely on with undoubting certainty; but this, un- 
happily, is what so many Christian mothers never 
think of. 

Let them, such, at least, as are desirous of profiting 
by the directions here given, only look at the work of 
the husbandman. He clears away the ground in 
which he purposes to grow his crop ; ploughs it, pre- 
pares and examines his seed, casts it in the furrows, 
and covers it over. The rest is the work of all- 



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bountiful nature ; of Him, rather, who is the all* wise 
and provident author of nature. He gives the 
warmth, the rain, and the dew. His hand unfolds 
the rich germ in the soil, till it grows up, and f ructi. 
fies, and ripens for the harvest. 

So is it with your culture, 0 mothers : the precious 
seeds of truth which you cast into the minds of your 
children, just when the spring-tide of their souls 
begins to dawn, are far more the care of God than 
the crops of the husbandman, dear as these surely 
are to his Fatherly providence. Fear not, then, but 
his Holy Spirit, dwelling in the dear souls you are 
cultivating, will shed on the germs you deposit the 
warmth of his sunlight, the late and the early rain. 
Do your best, and trust to the Divine Husbandman 
for the certain increase and the rich harvest in his 
own good season. 

THE CROSS IS THE ALPHABET OF SPIRITUAL 
KNOWLEDGE. 

The all-important thing for you is, that, above and 
before all things, yeur children should understand 
that they are "children of God," that Christ is their 
Elder Brother, who has purchased them with his 
blood the right to co-heirship with Him. The 
mystery of the Cross and the Crucified, once 
understood by them, will be a central light in 
which they can read all history before and after 
his death. 

It is impossible for children to get a true know- 
ledge of that great love, without feeling their hearts 
overflowing with love for Him, as well as for that 
dear Mother who stood in sorrow beneath the tree on 



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which her adored One hung in the death agony. 
Friendships formed in childhood, in the lovely years 
of innocence and youth, are friendships that last for 
ever. Make your dear ones love that Friend well, 
and He will take care that no lapse of time, or change 
of mind and heart, that no perversity of men, or 
experience of false-heartedness through life, shall 
disturb the image of that august and early affection 
in the soul's inmost sanctuary. 

Make the Crucified and the Mother of Sorrows the 
first friends of every child of yours, and fear not but 
they will befriend them in life and death. 

What has just been said will suggest how a true 
mother's teaching and formation may be supernatural 
in all other respects Particular stress has been laid 
here on early devotion to our crucified Lord, both 
because it is the foundation of all the rest, and 
because, in our eagerness to read all the trash daily 
poured fofth by the modern press, we seem not to 
bestow one thought on that book of books, the 
Crucifix. 

EAELT LOVE OP CHILDREN FOR THE CRUCIFIED. 

Even Catholics, nowadays, read with astonishment, 
or half incredulity, what is related of the early love 
for our dear Lord and his Blessed Mother of St. 
Stanislaus, St. Aloysius, St. Eose of Lima, or St. 
Teresa, and her little brother Eodrigo, without men- 
tioning instances taken from the writers of the middle 
ages. Children, almost before the ordinary dawn of 
reason, become enamoured of Him whose unspeak- 
able love is sculptured in such divine characters in 
that ever open and most simple book of the Crucifix. 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



A sacred thirst of voluntary suffering takes such 
possession of their souls that they long to suffer 
martyrdom, as we read of Teresa, and her favourite 
brother. St. Francis Borgia, when quite a child, lost 
his mother, the Princess J oanna, of Aragon ; but her 
teaching and example had so familiarised the child 
with the supernatural love of suffering, that, after 
her death, he could not be prevented from fasting for 
her, and inflicting pain on himself. 

There can be no mystery, no cause for wonder, in 
this when we remember that the domestic piety of 
our fathers was grounded on an intimate knowledge 
of our Lord and his mysteries. The birth in the 
stable; the sudden flight across the wilderness to 
Egypt ; the hidden and laborious life at Nazareth, 
and, above all, the history of his Passion, were to 
childhood itself living realities; so was the divine 
story, with all its impressive circumstances, brought 
home to them by what they heard and what they 
saw! They could not enter one of the beautiful 
churches of olden time without finding these scenes 
of suffering appealing to their young souls from the 
sculptured doors and porticoes outside, and from the 
painted walls and windows within; while in that 
great book of the Lamb, such as every Christian 
church aimed at being, they saw, grouped around 
Christ and his Mother, the apostles and saints who 
had most closely imitated them by their suffering 
life and death. 

Faith was the very principle and breath of life in 
the old Catholic homes ; and the great central mystery 
of faith, the Crucifixion, and its memorial sacrifice, 
the Eucharist and the Mass, were to the youngest 



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children, as to their parents, teachings brought home 
to mind and heart, not for mere sterile admiration, 
but for practical gratitude and imitation. 

From this living spring of faith in the young heart 
flowed the piety wfyich gave a colour to the entire 
after-life. And to this we beg the earnest attention 
of the mothers who read our pages. With this 
supernatural tendency imparted to thoughts, and 
aims, and actions, from the very beginning of child- 
hood, the fundamental natural virtues, which we shall 
enumerate further on, are sure to be practised with 
the supernatural view of pleasing the Divine Master 
and Model. 

OTHER QUALITIES IN THE MOTHER'S CHARACTER AND 
GOVERNMENT. 

This supernatural spirit, animating both a mother's 
life and her teaching, will only be successful in its 
purpose and labours when she shows herself careful 
to cultivate the qualities, without which piety would 
be barren, or be mistaken, for unreasoning supersti- 
tion or absurd inconsistency. 

Every mother must be consistent in her maxims 
and rules of government. Let her, in her moments 
of leisure and solitude, weigh well what rules she is 
to lay down for her children, so that in her govern- 
ment of them she may not be exposed to either pro- 
mulgate a law rashly, and then have to withdraw it, 
or to contradict at night what she has said in the 
morning with all seriousness, or to undo to-morrow 
what she is doing to-day. 

Children, very young children especially, are ex- 
ceedingly serious-minded. They mean exactly what 



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128 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

they say, and they think, of course, that their elders, 
superiors, and, above all, their parents, mean what 
they say. You shake their confidence in you when 
they discover — which they do with amazing quick- 
ness — that you did not mean what you said. This 
discovery is most fatal in another respect ; it lays the 
foundation for the child's untruthfulness. 

Perfect truthfulness is not only truth in our words 
when they are the exact expression of our knowledge 
and meaning, giving to our hearers a perfect picture 
of our mind ; it is also consistency in our actions 
when these are in literal conformity with our pro- 
fessions and our promises. A child's mind is per- 
fectly and pitilessly logical; its open, candid, watchful 
eye has the virtue of Ithuriel's spear to unmask 
falsehood and deception. And, as children are imi- 
tative, naturally disposed to copy the example of 
their parents, if they find these untruthful, or equivo- 
cating, or artful, they will acquire their vices as 
speedily as they would their virtues. 

Hence a mother must be cautious and deliberate, 

CONSISTENT AND TRUTHFUL. 

It is on this latter quality alone that we insist here. 
The whole career of a child, its fortune or misfortune, 
its honour, happiness, misery, or disgrace, all will 
depend largely, perhaps mainly, perhaps altogether, 
on this one great moral virtue of Truthfulness. 

It is absolutely necessary to this (ordinarily speak- 
ing), that a mother should never, in any one instance, 
be known to utter an untruth. Hence the horror 
which she ought to have herself of every species of 
falsehood, if she would inspire her dear ones with a 



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129 



like horror, and fill them with a sincere love of the 
truth. 

We know, at this moment, a man placed at the 
head of a most flourishing and widely-trusted estab- 
lishment, who owes his rise from the most extreme 
poverty to his present eminent position to the strict 
love of truth inculcated by his mother, a poor washer- 
woman. As virtues, like vices, always travel in 
companies, the boy's truthfulness was only one of 
the many noble qualities which adorned him from 
childhood upward. His open, ingenuous, handsome 
face, when attending Sunday-school, and preparing 
for his first Communion, struck the priest who taught 
him. His threadbare and patched, but strictly neat 
garments, told their own tale of home-struggles and 
of a poor mother's careful training. His companions 
all respected him, although by no means the eldest 
among them. A visit to the mother's home, where 
an asthmatic husband and four young children, 
besides our little hero, depended on her labour, en- 
listed in their favour the sympathies of the Christian 
Doctrine Society attached to the parish church. The 
family were provided with work, which both parents 
could attend to at home ; for the mother's anger was 
roused at the very thought of aid from charity. The 
oldest, after his first communion, was sent to an 
excellent commercial school, where he soon out- 
stripped all his companions, but won the esteem of 
all by his manliness, and inflexible truthfulness and 
honesty. 

From an humble position as errand-boy in a 
merchant's office he became clerk, and rose steadily 
in the confidence of his employer till he became his 
10 



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130 THE MIRROR 07 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



partner and right-hand man. During all this time 
every penny he earned was brought to his mother, 
every hour he could spare from business was spent 
with her and the family. She rose with him to 
comfort, and then to affluence, and to this day he 
will have it said, although surrounded by a large 
family of his own, "that he is living with his 
mother." Her daughter-in-law has long learned to 
revere the true nobility of soul of the modest, quiet, 
unassuming little woman, who, at the age of seventy, 
is still, without seeming to be so, the teacher and 
idol of her grandchildren, no one of whom has ever 
been known to tell an untruth. 

THE TRUE MOTHER MUST BE JUST, KIND, AND GENTLE. 

A quality akin to this sterling quality of truthful- 
ness is justice in the mother. Not only must she 
never exaggerate the faults or imperfections of her 
children, but she must also impress them with the 
conviction that she is absolutely impartial, never 
preferring one to the other: at least she must so con- 
trol herself that neither by word or action must she 
manifest any unjust preference, or, indeed, any pre- 
ference at all. 

There is only one kind of preference tolerated in 
families, and that is in favour of the suffering or 
infirm. It will be the duty of the good mother to 
teach herself, and every one of her dear ones, to 
lavish on the sick, the suffering, the infirm, their 
most constant, affectionate, and delicate attentions. 
This is one of the " true charities " of home-life. 

But what is destructive of all the "home charities,*' 
of peace, and concord, and happiness in every home 



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JUSTICE IN REWARDING AND PUNISHING 131 



cursed with such preferences, are the unenviable 
beings known as "Father's Pet/' and "Mother's 
Pet." 

JUSTICE IN REWARDING AND PUNISHING. 

Let the mother be also just in rewarding and 
punishing, as well as kind and gentle when she has 
to reprove and correct. It is wonderful how some 
women can magnetise children, command their atten- 
tion and submission, make them listen, obey, work, 
and do, most willingly, things apparently the most 
opposite to their inclinations. 

"We have seen a room full of children, in the wildest 
uproar, defying the combined efforts of mother and 
nursery-maids, hushed suddenly into silence, order, 
and quiet work, by the appearance of " Grandmama," 
the very rustle of her garments seeming to quell the 
noise, while the bright, pleasant look, and a few 
words in a subdued tone, would still the tempest as if 
by some magic spell. 

What is the spell ? Firmness, gentleness, kind- 
ness, all combining to form that wonderful thing 
in man or woman which we call authority. We do 
not mean, of course, thereby authority of place or 
office ; but that authority which attaches to " charac- 
ter." And into this character, so irresistible in 
governing children or grown-up people, a household, 
a nursery, a school-room, or a multitude, the above 
qualities must enter. Add another, self-control, 
and you have a perfect mother and mistress of a 
household. 



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132 THE MIKBOfl OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



SELF-CONTROL, HOW INDI8PENSABLE. 

We do not mean by this term that social self- 
possession, or that perfect command of the muscles 
of one's countenance which our savages have learned 
to perfection. The self-control which is here recom- 
mended is only one degree, and that an inferior one, 
of the Christian virtue of meekness beatified by 
our Lord. It is the result, in persons naturally hot- 
tempered and passionate, of habitual victory over 
self, and of habitual watchfulness to secure the fruits 
of victory. This victory must be impressed on the 
tender minds of youth as most meritorious in the 
sight of God; as one of the many characteristics 
which make the Christian man or woman most like 
to Christ Himself. 

But it will be in vain for a mother to preach it to 
her children if she is not herself in possession of it. 
Besides, and this is the important point, no mother 
ever yet controlled her children, or taught them suc- 
cessfully the practice of self-control, who did not 
know how to control herself ; no mistress of a house- 
hold ever governed children and servants, so as to 
maintain order, discipline, obedience, and industry, 
who did not show that she could govern her own 
words and temper, who was not perfect mistress, in 
the house, of her own soul. 

It is God's will and wish that every mother should 
study this self-control, which is only the outward 
manifestation of that meekness and gentleness of 
spirit, so lovely in the sight of God and angels. Ay, 
and most lovely is it also in the sight of men, in the 
estimation, particularly, of children and servants, and 



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GENTLENESS NEED NOT BE "WEAKNESS. 133 



all persons dependent on us. And most blessed is it, 
as well as the source of manifold blessedness to all 
around us ! 

Children and servants never ought to see their 
mother, or mistress angry, or with the slightest sign 
of anger or impatience. We once heard servants, at 
the death of an honoured master, affirm, with tears 
in their eyes, that they had never heard from his lips 
an angry or a loud word. This was also the unani- 
mous testimony of his children. But on this admir- 
able parent and master, what was the influence of 
his wife ? He was, by nature, hot and fiery, proud, 
and imperious, and resentful. And so was, by native 
disposition, his young wife, whom he wedded while 
yet in her teens. But she had been trained in a 
model home, and by the hand of a mother to whom 
gentleness was the fruit of many an early struggle 
with self. 

The young wife, all enthusiasm and fire in her 
own disposition, was yet so gentle in her every word 
and aot, so thoroughly devoted to her husband, that 
she soon made him as gentle as herself : and, after 
a union of more than thirty years, when death 
separated them, it was attested by servants, relatives, 
and acquaintances, by the numberless visitors who 
loved to partake of the hospitalities of that home, 
that not one angry word was ever heard from parents 
to children, or from one child to another. 

This was the fruit of self-control, the blessing be- 
stowed on gentleness and meekness. 

GENTLENESS NEED NOT BE WEAKNESS. 

There is a natural softness which is often mistaken 



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134 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



for the gentleness we have been describing. The 
former is the flexibility of lead, which permits itself 
to be bent in any direction you please ; the latter is 
the elasticity of steel which has passed again and 
again through the furnaoe, and has been beaten 
beneath the hammer till it unites a proper degree of 
flexibility with its well-known firmness. 

There are weak persons who persuafe themselves 
that firmness consists in unbending stiffness, in a 
cold, harsh, cruel inflexibility, which never knows 
how to yield. But this is not what we mean when 
we say that the mother ought, in her dealings with 
her children, in admonishing, correcting, or punish- 
ing them, to be at once firm and gentle. 

We shall never forget the passionate tears of a 
young mother, when she detected her boy in a first 
falsehood. " Oh ! my child, what have you done ? 99 
she gasped out, with the tears streaming down her 
cheeks. u Told me a lie ! And don't you know I 
must punish you ? " The punishment was inflicted 
by the gentle-hearted mother, who wept the while ; 
and it was firmly and severely administered; and 
then the boy, worthy of such a mother, seeing her in- 
consolable, flew to her arms, forgetful of his own 
pain, to weep on her neck, as he said : " Oh, mamma, 
I am only sorry I pained you ! Don't cry, dear 
mamma, and I promise never to do so again." And 
the promise was kept. 

NEVER CORRECT OR PUNISH IN A PASSION. 

One golden rule should be ever kept in mind by 
mothers — indeed, by all persons charged with the- 
training or correction of others — never to administer 



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WIN THE HEARTS OF YOTJB CHILDREN. 135 

reproof, correction, or punishment, when under the 
influence of passion or emotion. 

If you would not lose the respect of your children, 
your authority and influence over them, wait till you 
are perfectly calm to speak to them, or to chastise 
them. Of course, the heartfelt grief of the young 
mother, just mentioned, went still further, and made 
a far deeper impression on her child. 

WIN THE HEARTS OP YOTJB CHILDREN. 

It is a capital mistake made by parents, and a 
fatal mistake, when one looks at its dreadful conse- 
quences, to think that they can rely on the natural 
affection which their children bear them, and thus 
make no effort, and use no industry to win their love. 

To be sure, nature has laid up in the heart of the 
child a deep store of affection, gratitude, and 
reverence for the dear authors of its earthly being. 
And it may take many years of neglect, or harshness, 
or even downright cruelty, to exhaust that store, to 
kill that deep and strong root of filial love in the soul. 
But experience daily shows that the store is not 
exhaustless, and that the most robust root of love and 
reverence can be killed. 

There are mothers to whom their children are a 
burden, who bestow on them only a few rare moments 
of the time they devote to vanity or dissipation, who 
grudge them the few crumbs of affection with which 
they fondly imagine they can feed the hungry hearts 
of their babes, who leave the little unfortunates to the 
chance tenderness of strangers; and yet these 
mothers will expect love from their grown-up sons 
and daughters ! These are unnatural mothers, how- 



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136 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

ever, who are a curse to their children, and to whom, 
in turn, by an inevitable retribution, their children 
will prove a curse. It is not with them we are con- 
cerned : they will not be taught or reformed ; so, 
they will go down the steep and slippery slope on 
whioh the heartless move, to perdition! We are 
addressing ourselves to parents who think they love 
their offspring, or who do really love them, but who 
err most fatally in their way of showing it, and who 
may be still open to instruction. 

There are parents, all too numerous in every class 
of society, who never seem to think that they need 
gentleness, kindness, loving words and ways, in 
dealing with children* It is not only fathers among 
the labouring and hard worked classes, who usually 
address both girls and boys with loud and angry 
words, with a curse, or an oath, or a vile epithet, or 
a blow : this is but two frequently the treatment 
which mothers have recourse to. 

Can such unchristian parents expect either affec- 
tion or reverence from these boys and girls, even 
before they have grown up to manhood and woman- 
hood ? We touch here upon one of the inveterate 
sores of domestio education among our labouring 
population, and would fain say more on the visible 
fruits of such training, but for the present, at least, 
we must content ourselves with sketching the portrait 
of a motherly love indefatigable in its endeavours, and 
admirable in its methods of securing and increasing 
continually the grateful love of children. 

Of the importance and necessity of binding her 
children to herself by the ties of the strongest affec- 
tion, surely every true mother must be convinced. 



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win The heaets op your children. 137 



Not only her own happiness through life, but the 
temporal and eternal welfare of her children depends 
chiefly, generally, not to say almost universally, on 
the influence which a noble mother can wield over 
the mind, and heart, and whole conduct of her dear 
ones. And there is not one woman who reads 
this page but can and ought to be such a noble 
mother ! 

It is her duty and her interest. But how is this 
to be done? Women can teach themselves these 
methods far better than any man can teach them. 
They know how contagious love is ; how resistless it 
is where it is ardently and constantly shown to those 
who [may and ought to return it. The wisest and 
strongest are made foolish and weak by the show of 
a sincere, ardent, but unlawful affection. But, where 
God commands to love, and to love tenderly, con- 
stantly, and unweariedly, and where, as we have seen 
above, He co-operates with us in our labour of love, 
how can we not make sure of a certain and a rich 
return? Your love, 0 mothers, is as natural, as 
necessary, to the life of your children's souls, and to 
the health of their lives, as the sun's light and warmth 
are to the growth of the grass on the meadow, 
or to the ripening of the corn in the field. And 
your children are as certain to grow and ripen in 
perfect and lasting love for you, the dearest and 
best objects ever given man to love, as the grass 
and the corn to] prosper in the sunlight and the 
warm air. 

You have flowers in your garden, in your green- 
house, or in your room. There are among them some 
favourites which you wish no hand but your own to 



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138 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

tend. You have studied their nature, their habits, 
what can help them, or what can hurt and kill them. 
You know the kind of soil which suits them, and the 
quantity of moisture and warmth each needs. There 
is a sort of love in the care which one bestows on 
beautiful plants and flowers. And to this care, this 
intelligent and loving culture, these beautiful 
creatures respond by healthful growth and a more 
brilliant bloom. 

Would that many mothers would bestow on culti- 
vating the hearts of their dear ones the care, the 
study, the intelligence, the tenderness, we had almost 
said the love, which they devoted to the favourites of 
greenhouse or garden ! A mother's loving eye is, 
daily and hourly, more to the growth and health of 
the noblest affections in the dear souls committed to 
her, than the great sun in the heavens is to the life 
of forest or field ; her sweet words of praise, of en- 
couragement, of correction, descend, like the rain and 
the dew, into the inmost sources of life in the heart, 
stirring up therein and fostering into bloom the 
germs of every manly virtue and noble womanly 
affection. See how each tree in the great virgin 
forest will send its trunk straight upward towards 
the sunlight and the warmth, and how its branches 
stretch upward towards the sky, to catch the rain- 
drops by day and the dews of night 1 

Are you not, in the midst of your dear ones, the 
sunlight and warmth of their home and their souls ? 
And do not these souls continually open their bosoms 
and reach out to you with unceasing hunger and 
thirst for the rain of your instruction, and the cool, 
refreshing dew of your love ? Why are you so spar- 



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wrrr the heaets of your children. 139 

ing of what does not impoverish you, and what is 
sure to bring you a harvest of immortal gratitude 
and happiness ? 

But, leave we to the next chapter the many other 
most interesting things which yet remain to be said 
about the mother's duties, as well as the magnificent 
examples which illustrate woman's husbandry in 
cultivating the souls of her children. 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



CHAPTER IX. 



THE MOTHER'S OFFICE TOWARDS CHILDHOOD. 

Assuredly, if Christian mothers make it the chief 
purpose of their life to be supernatural in their own 
interior, and in all their motives, actions, and methods, 
they will only have to labour, with the divine assist- 
ance, " to add intelligence "to all the treasures of 
mind and heart bestowed upon their babes by nature, 
increased and hallowed in such a wondrous way by 
Baptism, and " nothing will be wanting to make them 
angels." Nay, if they cultivate in them the " gifts 
of the Holy Ghost," bestowed in an inferior degree 
in Baptism, and in their fulness in Confirmation, 
they will grow in that understanding which is all 
divine in its objects, and the light it pours on all 
things, without ceasing to grow " in stature." Such 
mothers, by the careful and loving culture of the 
pure souls confided to them, will omit nothing that 
is "wanting to make them angels;" and as the 
result of such training many will continue angels 
" until Christ shall come." 

We have some of these angelic men and women 
before our mind's eye now, watched over in child- 
hood, as if they were incarnate spirits entrusted to 
the mother's care, to be trained in all the perfection 
^fmanhood and womanhood, while preserving all 




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THE DIVINE REALITY IN CHILDHOOD. 141 



the glorious characteristics of their angel-nature; 
they grew up in the spiritual beauty and spotless inno- 
cence of their baptism, unfolding in mind and heart 
these priceless "gifts" of the Holy Spirit, just as 
they developed all the exterior graces and loveliness 
of their human character, and so they continued till 
Christ came to summon them away, all too early, the 
world thought, from the society which so much 
needed the light of their examples. 

THE DIVINE BEAUTY IN CHILDHOOD. 

Once more, let us see in the baptised babe of the 
Christian mother what God sees in it : let the same 
sublime conception of the child's position and 
destinies which is in the Divine Mind be also in the 
mind of the parent. Just as a savage, ignorant of 
the value of gems or the precious metals, will prefer 
brilliant-coloured glass beads to the diamonds of 
Brazil, the emeralds of New Grenada, or the pearls 
of Coromandel, even so will it be with the mother 
who forgets or ignores what is the divine destiny of 
her babe, what price Christ has paid on the cross to 
lift it up to his own level, and what capacities are in 
that young soul for the most godlike virtues and 
goodness. 

In the child brought back from the baptismal font 
to the mother's arms there is the human being with 
the fallen nature inherited from Adam, but redeemed 
and restored in Christ, and there is also the godlike 
being created anew, in baptism, in the likeness of its 
Divine Parent. In spite of the sacrament of the 
second birth, and the grace of elevation, with all its 
attendant gifts and aids, there remains in the child 



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142 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

the wound left by the primeval transgression : our 
inclinations are downward, and they have to be 
resisted, to be overcome, mortified, and deadened, if 
we would rise to the glorious heights of Christian 
heroism and godliness, which belong to the angelic 
and heavenly nature we have put on in Christ. 

Thus, the mother has to watch over the manifesta- 
tion of the evil dispositions which early peep out in 
the child, and tend to drag it down, because they are 
the inclinations of flesh and blood, and are of earth, 
earthly. These have to be combated, counteracted, 
immediately and unceasingly, from their first appear- 
ance in infancy and childhood, if the mother would 
not see them shoot up in boyhood and girlhood, over* 
topping and choking the growth of every super- 
natural, or even natural, virtue. 

It would be a fatal neglect, one, in all likelihood, 
irreparable, to allow the babe to have its own way in 
everything. Wise mothers are careful to check the 
temper of their youngest infants, and they do succeed 
in making them acquire, even then, habits which 
ever after grow with their growth. 

Even pagans looked upon the soul of the child as 
a something so mysterious, so deep, and so holy, as 
if a divine being tenanted the little helpless body, 
that they would have their babes treated with infinite 
reverence. We, Christians, know clearly what 
mighty spirit dwells within that regenerated soul ; 
and we may divine somewhat of the workings and 
promptings of the Paraclete in his living tabernacle. 
Who of us, who has roamed in boyhood or early 
manhood through the solitudes of our great virgin 
forests, but has come unexpectedly upon a lovely 



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* THE DIVINE REALITY IN CHILDHOOD. 143 

little lake, the parent spring of some lordly river, 
nestling in a secluded valley, with the great trees 
along its margin sending their roots down to drink 
of the pure waters ; that margin itself fringed all 
around with wild flowers, while the calm, mirror-like 
bosom reflected the blue skies above, with their white 
or golden clouds, and the mighty hills which stood 
sentinels around to protect from intrusion or pro- 
fanation all the sanctities of the place ? 

It is not a mere reflection of the heavens, or an 
image of the eternal hills, that the attentive and 
wondering mind can see within the pure passionless 
depths of the soul of infancy or childhood. We 
know that the God of that great temple we call the 
universe, the Spirit Creator and Sanctifier, is there 
Himself in person. "What is the nature of his work- 
ing within these mysterious depths of the child-soul ? 
What foundations of mighty things to come is his 
hand lying beneath the untroubled surface of that 
life in its well-spring ? 

Mothers, the educated, the wealthy, the God-fear- 
ing, would do wisely to ask themselves such questions 
as these, when they gaze into the upturned face of 
their babe, and look down into these deep and fearless 
eyes, through which a glimpse is had of the mysteri- 
ous infant world of thought and feeling within. 

" Children, in their tabernacle, know the secrets, 
not of cities, not of human societies, not of history, 
but of God ; their fair eyes are full of infinite sweet- 
ness; their little hands, joyous and blessed, have not 
committed evil ; their young feet have never touched 
our defilement ; their sacred heads wear an aureola 
of light ; their smile, their voice, proclaim their two- 



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144 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

fold purity. Oh, the paradisiacal ignorance, coveted, 
perhaps, by angels, of all the errors which heresy 
has sown in later times ! "What cruelty to intercept 
the view of children by suffering their feet to get 
entangled in such briers, and their minds to be thus 
cankered, as is the bud bit with an envious worm, 
ere he can spread his sweet leaves to the air, or 
dedicate his beauty to the sun ! Later they will not 
thank you ; far happier had it sufficed them to have 
known good by itself, and evil not at all ! As terns 
and other birds from arctic solitudes, when found 
flapping their long, silver tapering wings over our 
rivers that wind through woodlands and rich yellow 
meadows, show no fear of man, but keep close, 
hovering over the clowns who with stones and staves 
assail them, so these innocent souls, coming first 
amid the crowded haunts of life, are ignorant of 
evil, and of all dangers unsuspicious." * 

THE MIND OF CHILDHOOD. 

What seeds of salutary truth should the mother 
sow in this virgin soil, in order that its first vital 
vigour be given to the growth of immortal and 
divine fruits? What was said in the preceding 
chapter to illustrate the supernatural teaching of a 
Christian parent has, in a great measure, anticipated 
our answer to this question. Here, however, we 
have to descend to particulars. 

"I remember," says Marina de Escobar, "that 
when I was a little girl, and did not know what was 
meant by mental prayer, I used to consider with 
great emotion the mysteries of the life of Christ." 

* CompUum, B. I., c. ii., p. 31. 



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A young mother — we have the story from her own 
lips, of the blessed result of her early husbandry ; 
others as well have been the witnesses — a very 
young mother, reared in her own honoured home in 
the paradisiacal innocence described above, once 
reasoned with herself as she looked down on the face 
of her infant daughter, her first child, lying on the 
rapt parent's knees : " Here I have, in this sweet 
soul more than a precious piece of marble to fashion 
into some glorious shape. What form can I give it 
now, which shall last for all time? With what 
sentiments can I imbue my darling which can best 
insure her happiness and everlasting worth ? What 
should I have wished my mother to implant in my 
own soul as the principle of a goodness and a felicity 
superior to all that mind can think of or heart 
desire ? ' ' And, like a sudden flash of lightning amid 
the darkness, or a distinctly audible voice in a vast 
solitude, an interior answer came, The Love of God ! 
Convinced that this was the response to the deepest 
wish of her heart, the young mother thenceforward 
set about watching for every sign of dawning intelli- 
gence in her babe, in order to make the notion of 
Him the first light which should enter there, and his 
name the first word uttered by the infant lips. Thus, 
from the first month after the birth of that heaven- 
sent child, its fond parent would hang over it, 
murmuring into its ears the fond wish that God 
should be first and last in its mind and heart, and 
that his love should be the light of its life evermore. 

The Adorable Name, so far as mother's skill could 
effect it, was, indeed, stamped upon the child's soul. 
She was taught to thank Him for the motherly love 
11 



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which surrounded her with an enchanted world, as 
well as for the father's doting fondness and all the 
comforts of home. There was not a beautiful thing, 
and the child's home was filled with such, in house, 
or in garden and field, that she was not made to look 
upon as a gift from that Love which never wearies in 
giving, but whose lavish hand ever makes of the 
treasures poured out to-day the sure pledge of the 
morrow's surpassing magnificence. 

And thus was implanted in her little heart the 
early idea of 

GENEROSITY. 

For childhood is open to the notion of a Goodness 
which only measures its own gifts on the gratitude 
with which the receiver acknowledges them, and the 
generosity with which the fitting return is made. 
And so the generous love of the Divine Benefactor 
waxed stronger and stronger in the child, in the girl, 
in the accomplished maiden, who was the soul of 
every great and good work gotten up around her in 
favour of the poor and the suffering, till the close of 
her brief life of unsparing and self-sacrificing good- 
ness. 

At the age of three, necessity compelled a tempo- 
rary separation from her mother and her home ; but 
so firmly had the little heart been moulded to gene- 
rous self-control and abnegation even then, that she 
feigned joyousness as she bade farewell to father 
and mother on the deck of the steamer, and once 
they were out of sight burst into an agony of tears. 
To her uncle's remonstrances the child could only 
reply, " Oh ! I did not want to distress dear mamma ! 99 



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147 



It was the same generosity which impelled her, when 
a wife and mother, to tear herself away from her 
worshipped parents, and cast her lot with her hus- 
band in a God-forsaken land. Though her young 
heart was breaking she would cheer all her dear ones 
as they clung around her at parting. In her new 
home, she felt called on to stir up in every soul 
brought within reach of her influence the zeal for 
God's name dishonoured, and for religion betrayed, 
and desecrated, and trampled upon, filling every 
home far and wide with the piety which burned so 
brightly in her own. And, crushed down by the 
death of her father, and prostrate on a bed of sick- 
ness, she no sooner learned that yellow fever had 
attacked her servants, than she found strength to rise 
and tend herself the plague-stricken, giving her life 
to the God of charity, and commending with her 
dying breath to his fatherly care her babes, her dis- 
consolate husband, and the doting and thrice-afflicted 
mother thousands of miles away. 

While the public was praising all the nobleness of 
a life thus sacrificed, the poor mother at home be- 
thought her suddenly of the early inspiration to fill 
that soul with the love of God, and to make of the 
existence of her child one continuous act of gene- 
rosity. In looking back upon the past she saw 
clearly the divine purpose, and, like the Mother of 
Sorrows on Calvary, she sought comfort and strength 
in taking to her heart the Crucified. 

And so was fulfilled in one near our doors what a 
noble Spanish author said of himself long ago, when 
commenting the following text of Proverbs : i( I love 
them that love me: and they that in the morning early 



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148 THE MIKROE OF TBT7E WOMANHOOD. 

watch for me shall find me (Prov. viii. 17). ''In 
the house of all other princes," Guevara says, " it is 
the custom never to open to early visitors, but 
persons must come after noon ; whereas this passage 
shows us that those who would transact business 
with Christ should repair to Him at the dawn of 
their existence, and seek Him from their birth. 0 
my God, my God, I confess it is true ! ' I do not 
watch for Thee from the dawn ; ' but, on the other 
hand, Lord, Thou wilt not deny that I have been 
from my birth a Christian, and that ever since I have 
had any memory, I have named myself always 
thine."* 

Yes, we all love what is freshest and earliest in 
nature: we love the first flowers of the spring, and 
the first tender bloom of spring itself as it spreads 
over forest and field ; and there are those, the souls 
most sensitive to what is lovely and beautiful, who 
a filled with rapture by the first glories of dawn, 
the awakening of the great heart of nature to re- 
newed life and joy at the approach of the glorious sun, 
and the first fragrance of the dewy meads and gardens 
as they scent the air with their first fresh odours, 
and the first voices of the grove as they burst into 
a full concert when light, God's great representative 
in the firmaments, begins to shine above the eastern 
hills. Pious souls love to give to God the first and 
freshest of all things, the first hours of the day, as 
well as the first dawn of their affections. 

And does He, who made the human soul, set no 
store on what is most lovely and precious in our own 

* Antonio de Guevara, Epist., 1. ii. 



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J0Y0U8NE8S AND LOVE OF ENJOYMENT 149 



existence; the first thoughts of the infant mind at its 
dawn, the first love of the sweet and innocent heart 
of childhood ? 0 mothers ! make sure that these are 
consecrated to Him, and be certain, on your part, that 
what God can bestow of choicest graces shall be given 
you and yours in return. 

We only pray that every mother who, while she 
reads these lines, has such a little daughter as the 
one dedicated so early to divine love, may teach her 
child to emulate herself in the early paths of piety and 
generosity. How sweet will it be to be able to say 
in afterlife: 

" She was all I had 
To love in human life— this playmate sweet, 
This child of seven years old — so she was made 
My sole associate, and her willing feet 
Wandered with mine." 

JOYOU8NESS AND LOVE OF ENJOYMENT. 

Most important is it not to check in childhood the 
manifestations of its joyous spirit which is ever ready 
to break forth as naturally as the brook runs spark- 
ling in the sunlight and singing down its pebbly bed. 
This joyousness comes from the unconsciousness of 
wrong, the freedom from all care, and the perfect de- 
light the little innocents find in all that is good and 
beautiful around them. To their sinless eyes all is 
bright and sunny, all is new and lovely, and as the 
garden of Paradise appeared to Adam and Eve inno- 
cent, so to these " every thing is very good." 

Even when a little boisterous, it is well to let the 
current flow. Do not restrain it, or dam it up so 
near its source. Alas ! the sweet years through 



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150 THE MIRROR OP TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



which it lasts will have passed away all too soon. 
We have only to look back to the interval between 
our own happy and headlong childhood, and the 
cares and sorrows which settled so darkly on our 
early youth* and we shall be convinced that our too 
brief early happiness or joyousness of spirit wasbuttoo 
like the crystal stream from the sierra, rushing down 
from its source in the uplands, with the early dawn, 
filling its bed with the clear, bounding waters, and 
becoming at noontide a fillet of sluggish, muddy 
water amid a waste of barren sand. 

Encourage this bright spirit in your child ; let its 
soul sing with all its strength while it may. Even 
the song of the nightingale ends long before the 
summer ; and there will be a long, long season when 
not one note of love or praise will resound through 
the joyless grove and forest. 

The keen zest for enjoyment must also be encour- 
aged and directed. Children only see what is good, 
beautiful, and lovely in God's blessed world — that 
is, the children who are not cooped up between nar- 
now and dark walls, and compelled to experience no 
necessities or no pleasures, but those of satisfying 
the craving for food, warmth, and sleep. They are 
the disinherited in God's rich and pleasant world ; 
and it would be in vain to dwell at length here on 
the means of giving light, and air, and nourishment 
to these poor little starved buds of humanity. 

We are speaking of children within whose reach are 
the usual sources of en j oyment. It is a blessed privilege 
for the mother to minister in every way she can to 
the delight and amusement of her dear ones. And 
one of the most beneficial industries of motherhood 



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JOYOTJSNESS AND tOVB OF ENJOYMENT. 151 



is to provide all manner of sport and recreation for 
her children at home, and to see to it that they feast 
their senses on garden and field, and park and forest, 
as often as possible. 

We are not of those who are enamoured with the 
modern methods of placing primers of natural history 
in the hands of children so soon as they are able to 
read words of one or two syllables. The love of 
nature and of all its exhaustless stores of beauty, and 
grandeur, and sublimity does not come to the human 
soul in this way. And, besides, we know that the 
new-fangled science which would make nature first, 
and middlemost, and last, is not the science that cares 
to set God before the mind of youth, either last, or 
first, or middlemost. 

But you who believe that, without God, life 
would be a bitter road, ending nowhere, and this 
world a mad-house with a drunken manager, and 
man himself the most terrible of wild beasts, you will 
know how to make the spirit of your children joyous 
by teaching them that the life of heaven is joy with- 
out end, and that all the beautiful things with whioh 
their Maker has surrounded them in the firmament 
above and all over this wondrous earth, are only 
faint images of the beauties with which the infinite 
magnificence has decked out his and our eternal 
home. 

Most,true is it — and how the grateful soul swells 
in dwelling on it ! — that this visible universe, and 
this most beautiful earth in the midst of it, are, with 
all their untold and incomprehensible splendours, but 
the tent set up by the emigrant to shelter himself 
and his dear ones, for the night, on their homeward 



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152 THE MIRROR OF TJttJE WOMANHOOD. 

way. There may be in its furniture a few orna- 
ments, one or two beautiful things, faint souvenirs of 
home ; but they are at best but reminders of the 
wealth and glory, of the resting-place and permanent 
abode to which the travellers are journeying. 

But, 0 Mother, whether you live in a palace or 
in a hovel, if your chief care be to have God ever 
live in your heart, his light within you will shed 
such unearthly beauty on all things that you will 
make your little ones see a fairy palace in this 
world, in spite of your own poverty and your life 
of hard labour. So, keep that light ever full in your 
child's soul ; you both will need to believe in the 
bright world in which God dwells with his saints 
and angels, in order to forget the sights you have to 
behold in this. But even the dingy, dusty, noisome 
world of a crowded street, or the close workroom, or 
the long day in the factory, will appear clothed with 
unearthly charms when you remember the presence 
of angels with you there, and the splendours visible 
to the eye of faith, which are ever streaming down 
on this vale of toil and tears from between the opened 
gates of our Eternal Home. 

Feed your own soul with joy, therefore, just as 
the bee gathers honey and treasures it up, that 
you may pour it out on your little angels, and keep 
them angels as long as you can, joyous, bright- 
eyed, bright-faced, and bright-tempered. Provided 
that you firmly believe in the angel- world, and in 
the presence of guardian angels in your own home, 
little harm will come of your children reading or 
learning fairy tales. It will bo easy for you to ex- 
plain to them how the popular fancy wove these 



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153 



graceful stories out of the true history of man's 
fellowship with these angelic spirits from the be- 
ginning, and of the nearness to him of these other 
fallen spirits who are ever lying in wait for his ruin. 

The chief aim in your sharing all joys and amuse- 
ments with your dear ones should be to make them 
feel that your presence, your love is for them the 
source of all present happiness, and that they can 
come to your arms, to your heart at all hours, just 
as the weary labourers breaking stones along the high- 
ways of France can turn aside in their thirst, at any 
moment, to the nearest cool spring. 

NEVER REPEL YOUR CHILDREN 

when they approach you. They are drawn to you 
at first by the whole weight and bent of their 
nature ; increase that attraction more and more by 
proving to them, through unruffled patience and a 
kindness which never varies, that your love, under 
God, is of all things the most needful to 
them, the most sweet, and the most unfail- 
ing. Child-nature must have been thwarted in 
some of its holiest inclinations when children fear to 
come to their mother with their every joy and grief, 
and doubt and care. 

This sweet trust in a mother's unbounded and 
unwearied love is a wise and most necessary pro- 
vision of nature. See how that nurse of all visible 
things (or, rather the all-wise Creator through her) 
lays up in the acorn the provision for the bud of the 
young oak during the first stage of its growth, and 
in the cocoa-nut the sweet and abundant nourish- 



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154 THE MIRBOB OF TBUB WOMANHOOD. 



ment for the young palm-tree, or in the egg the 
plentiful food of the young bird till it bursts its 
shell and can provide for itself, or be fed for a time 
by its parents. But man has to depend through 
infancy, childhood, and youth on the love and fos- 
tering care of a mother's heart ; and hence it is that 
God has filled a mother's heart with a living spring 
of tenderness and wisdom, which is to be the main 
reliance of the child, the young man or the young 
woman, not through all childhood and youth only, 
but so long as lasts a mother's life. 

And corresponding to this is the need every 
child has of the incomparable treasure of a mother's 
heart, and the powerful attraction which draws one 
to a mother's bosom in one's manifold doubts, trials, 
and temptations. 

A mother violates one of the Creator's most beauti- 
ful dispensations when she repels her child from 
her, and does not make all her dear ones grow up in 
the blessed experience that their mother's heart be- 
longs, at all times, as wholly to each of them as if she 
lived for that one alone. 

THE MYSTERY OF BAPTISMAL INNOCENCE PBKSBBVED 
' IN SO MANY. 

There are families, even in the midst of the most 
populous cities, and surrounded by an atmosphere 
of political and moral corruption, whose sons and 
daughters grow up to manhood and womanhood in 
absolute unconsciousness of the nature of moral evil, 
while mixing the while with the world of their own 
level, and possessing all the talents and accomplish- 
ments that can adorn the sphere in which they move. 



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THE MOTHER THE KEEPER, ETC. 155 



This is no vague or unfounded assertion, thank God 
And we believe, moreover, that there are very many 
more such families and such beautiful souls than 
good people themselves are aware of. 

Now, it may be laid down as a rule that in every 
such family the mother has been brought up herself 
in like sinlessness, and that she has been through life 
the trusted confidante of every one of her boys and 
girls, that from childhood upward their souls have 
been laid bare to her, every secret of their hearts 
made known to her. 

THE MOTHER THE KEEPER OF HER CHILDREN'S HEARTS. 

The true Christian mother will be such by the 
very force of nature, if she is only true to that great 
law of which mention has just been made. There 
will be no need of urging the boy or the girl, the 
young man or woman, to come to mother for advice 
or direction. A mother who is prying, or unwisely 
exacting, or deficient in tact, or lacking herself in 
spirituality or the supernatural character belonging 
to Christian motherhood, will not obtain this ascen- 
dency over her children, or draw them to her with 
that spontaneous and irresistible attraction exercised 
by the pure, the wise, the loving and devoted mother 
over every child of hers. 

Nor will this beautiful and unreserved confidence, 
bfigotten of perfect love, interfere with the action of 
God's minister in the sacrament, as confessor and 
guide. Such mothers are his most valuable auxili- 
aries : they prepare chosen souls for the action of 
the divine graces. 



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156 THE MIRROR OF TBTJE WOMANHOOD. 

HOW A SOLID RELIGIOUS CHARACTER IS FORMED. 

It is such mothers as these whose enlightened piety 
will enable them to lay in the souls of their children 
the foundations of a solid religious character. They 
are careful to give to each practice of domestic or 
individual piety the importance which belongs to it 
Their mind's eye takes in so clearly and vividly the 
infinite greatness of that Divine Majesty, in whose 
presence themselves and their dear ones are privileged 
to do service, that every practice of piety is deemed 
a thing of infinite importance ; such mothers judge, 
and judge rightly, that nothing is little that is done 
for One so great, so loving, so magnificent in his 
generosity. 

From the mind and heart of the mother, this 
sublime and true conception of the divine service, 
and of the piety which should be brought to it, 
passes into the souls and the lives of her children. 
Hence there will be, comparatively, but little danger 
of their neglecting in manhood and womanhood the 
practices of devotion made so sweet in childhood, or 
of their failing in that reverential awe in approach- 
ing the divine presence which was instilled at their 
mother's knee. 

PIETY FOUNDED ON PRINCIPLE, HOW LASTING, 

Piety, grounded like this, by a true mother, on the 
very substance of a child's intellectual and moral 
nature, will not be likely to be shaken or overturned 
in after-life. It is impossible, where all that is most 
delightful in the knowledge of God, and in one's 
earliest fellowship with Him, and with his bright 
court of angels and saints on high, have been wound 



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BE INVARIABLY CHEERFUL. 157 

up in the pore joys of childhood, and the most raptu- 
rous visions of youth, that the hollow maxims of 
worldly wisdom, or the sneers of the unbeliever, the 
voices of one's equals, or the scandal of example 
within the sanctuary itself, can detach such a soul 
from its allegiance to God. Where religion has 
penetrated with the light of its principles the whole 
of man's or woman's intelligence, and made the heart 
strong and happy by its practice, the inconsistencies 
of its professors or its ministers cannot have the effect 
of killing the roots of faith in mind or heart. 

So, let mothers who read this be encouraged to 
make themselves all in all to their dear ones in their 
practices of piety, as in their amusements, in every 
pursuit, in every enjoyment, in every trial and diffi- 
culty, persuading themselves firmly, all the while, that 
God is with them doing their work, which is, after 
all, his own dearest and most glorious work. They 
are sanctifying their own home, and filling it with 
God ; at the same time He will fill themselves and 
their children with his light and joy. 

Yes, in the " chaste obscurity " of a home where a 
true mother moves, the embodiment of all that re- 
ligion holds to be most lovely to the interior sense, 
men of the world will not feel repelled as they might 
by the austerity of the cloister, but attracted and 
subdued by all the virtues and graces which they 
behold shining, with such " softened glory," in the 
lives of parents and children. 

BE INVARIABLY CHEERFUL. 

We must have failed to convey our true meaning 
in what has just been said about the inculcation of 



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158 THE MTHKOB 07 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

early piety, if any shadow of gloom is thought to 
rest, even for a moment, on the home of the true 
Christian mother, any more than on her own brow, 
or the brows of her little angels. Oh, no ! Piety is 
ever joyous, sunny, and bright ; and, as to the mother, 
even when she is suffering or burdened with care, or 
carrying in her heart a heavy load of grief, she must 
put the cloud away from her when in presence of her 
dear ones. There are generous husbands and fathers 
who never allow their business cares to cross their 
threshold ; they leave them at the doorstep, and go 
into their home-sanctuary with unclouded face, and 
warm smiles, and words of love for all. They will 
not have the storm which pelts their own hearts so 
mercilessly in the outside world, make its mutterings 
heard near the warm nest where wife and children 
are sheltered. So must it be with respect to the 
mother and her household cares and difficulties ; let 
them never be known to her children. 

KEEP OUT GOSSIP AND SCANDAL; 

Much more careful ought she be to close her doors 
against mere idle gossip ; and still more so to exclude 
the echoes of the scandals which are rumoured abroad. 
Hence the necessity of selecting carefully the circle 
of those who are to be admitted to the intimacy of 
the home. Not all who call on the mother are fit 
persons to converse with the children. Not all who 
consider themselves to be on a footing of friendship 
with either parent are safe friends for children, who 
have never yet beheld evil, or heard the sound of its 
voice. The acquaintance with it must always come 



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TTWCHABITABLENESS. 



159 



too Boon: it is the inevitable misfortune which a 
watchful mother will stave off as loijg as possible. 

We once remember a stranger who had been 
warmly recommended to an admirable family, and 
who had been welcomed to all the hospitalities of the 
home. It was soon apparent, however, that he was 
not what he pretended to be, or his outside friends 
had represented him. The evening had passed, and 
honour had been done to the guest, when some- 
one, in presence of the younger children, made a 
remark unfavourable to the stranger. This called 
forth an indignant rebuke from the mistress of the 
house, who reminded the offender that, as she never 
intended to invite the stranger again, such censure 
was needless ; and that, moreover, it was unpardon- 
able, as she never allowed anyone admitted to the 
family circle, even for the once, to be spoken of 
unkindly. 

And this naturally brings us to say how scrupu- 
lous mothers ought to be to discountenance every- 
thing approaching or leading to 

TJNOHAEITABLENESS. 

On this point the true mother must be inflexible. 
"We suppose her to be thoroughly enlightened with 
regard to the transcendent excellence of charity, that 
divine virtue, practised after the manner of the 
Master who gave Himself to us, who shields from 
every eye our own unworthiness, and treats our guilty 
souls with such infinite reverence in his merciful 
methods of reconciliation : we suppose that the true 
Christian woman, with that deep sense, characteristic 
of her sex, of all that is most divine in humility, as 



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160 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

well as in charity, ever keeps before her mind the 
knowledge of God's infinite liberality towards her 
soul, and of her own very inadequate return. This 
conviction of the infinitude of that love so unsparing 
of itself and its graces, and of her own indebtedness 
to the divine benefactor, will prevent her from look- 
ing down on others; from judging, or, still less, 
despising even the most guilty. 

It is one* thing for Christian parents to keep away 
from the innocent souls intrusted to them all persons 
known to be not edifying, or open to serious suspicion, 
and quite another thing to allow such persons to be 
spoken of in their home. Such persons should not 
be admitted to the intimacy of the home-circle ; — that 
is a matter of prudence, most frequently of absolute 
necessity ; but no less imperative is it that the faults, 
the failings, or the conduct of others should never, 
under any pretext, be made the subject of conversa- 
tion in the family. 

The mother is queen there; her will, in all that 
pertains to the proprieties and the charities of life, 
no one, not even her husband, should be permitted 
to question. Indeed, we suppose, in what we say 
here, that both parents have long ago resolved to be 
of one mind on this as on all such matters. Whoso- 
ever, therefore, should dare to trespass, by word or 
bearing, against the cardinal virtues of the home, 
should be rebuked by the mother and mistress. 

It is a mistake to allow the fear of offending, or 
making an enemy, to prevent one from doing one's 
duty. The person ungenerous enough to take offence 
at a remonstrance gently, delicately, but firmly ad- 
ministered would be got rid of very cheaply. The 



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TJXCn AK [TABLENESS. 



161 



generous-minded, who are often led to gossip inad- 
vertently, by custom, or the desire to please, will only 
conceive a higher respect for that home, and a deeper 
esteem for its mistress. 

We know of more than one person who has been 
• radically cured of uncharitableness by the firm but 
gentle rebuke of a mother at her own table. 

As to making enemies ; when a mother has used 
tact, courtesy, and a gentle firmness in repressing 
scandalous gossip or uncharitable conversations, she 
must trust to the innate sense of right and duty in 
the persons rebuked, as well as to God's good care of 
her home and its welfare. 

A person in authority having been persuaded by 
some gossips who had his ear, that a lady visiting 
in a family very dear to him was unworthy of such 
intimacy, thought himself bound to warn the mistress 
of the home. She listened without answering one 
word, perfectly certain that her informant had been 
imposed upon by mischief-makers. Six months 
afterwards he came back with a conscience very much 
troubled, and begged to know how far the informa- 
tion he had given, and which deeply affected the 
moral character of the person aspersed, had been 
communicated to others, determined, as he said, to 
repair the injury done, no matter how widely it might 
have spread. "Have no fear," the prudent and 
charitable lady replied ; "I have not even mentioned 
the subject to my husband ; indeed, I could not in 
conscience do so, knowing that the report you heard 
was pure calumny." 

This is the rule of the saints, never to mention 
what is or may be detrimental to another, except 
12 



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162 THE MIRROR OP TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



when it is necessary to do so for the welfare of that 
other, or to shield the innocent from the imminent 
danger of contagion. It is related in the life of St. 
Ignatius Loyola, that, in the discharge of his office 
of superior-general of the great society he had 
founded, he received serious charges against one of 
his subordinates. He immediately laid the subject 
of complaint before his council. At his nightly ex- 
amination of conscience it occurred to him that he 
might have brought about an effective amendment 
in the other's misconduct by a reproof, privately ad- 
ministered, and without discussing the matter with 
anybody ; at any rate, his conscience seemed to tell 
him that it had been, at the utmost, quite enough to 
consult one or two persons, without exposing a 
brother's infirmity to a larger number. 

In his grief he scourged himself most severely for 
what he considered a serious want of discretion, if 
not of charity, and then lay down. But he could find 
no rest, and had to rise and awaken his confessor, 
though it was past midnight, before whom he laid 
his fault, with many tears and bitter self- accusation. 

We must not be tempted to accuse these great and 
holy souls of excessive rigour towards themselves, or 
of unduly exaggerating faults comparatively slight, 
and committed, as in this last instance, through a 
little precipitancy at most. When we reflect how 
much mischief, fatal and irreparable mischief, may 
be done by judging hastily and speaking rashly, we 
shall be slow to condemn St. Ignatius, and feel dis- 
posed to judge ourselves rather, and call ourselves to 
account for making light of matters in which the 
neighbour's good name is concerned. It is, some may 



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TOCHARITABLEXF.S3. 



163 



think, but a trifling imprudence, while passing 
through a field of ripe corn, to cast away thought- 
lessly the end of a lighted cigar. Perhaps he who 
did so never bestows a further thought on the matter 
till he hears, on the morrow, that the poor farmer's 
crop has been ruthlessly swept away by fire, that his 
little home shared a like fate, while he and his family 
barely escaped with their lives. 

Alas ! we know by the experience of all time that 
slander, beginning in a thoughtless word, spreads as 
rapidly as fire in the ripe corn ; and that while the 
field thus ravaged may bear a richer crop next year, 
and while the burned cottage may rise from its ruins, 
nothing can adequately repair the ravages of un- 
charitableness, or build up anew a reputation ruined 
^ by an evil, an idle, or a foolish tongue ! 

So let the mothers for whom we write add the 
horror of uncharitableness and impropriety, of every 
kind, to the joyous and bright spirit with which they 
train their children during this first stage ; and what 
a preparation will be made for the thorough educa- 
tion of the noble boys and noble girls who are soon 
to develop into the full perfection of manhood and 
womanhood I 



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164 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



OHAPTEK. X. 

THE BOYS AND GIRLS IN THE LABOURER'S HOME. 

Deep as ever must be the sympathy of a priestly 
heart for both parents and children in the home of 
the labouring man, and solicitous as every true 
priest must be of the future of these little ones born 
to toil and hardship, it is principally with the much- 
tried father and mother that his concern lies. 
Theirs is the hard and often hopeless battle of the 
present ; and worthy of the admiration of men and 
angels is the struggle they make to keep suffering 
away from their nestful, or to provide for their dear 
ones comforts, education, and a position in life from 
which they had themselves been debarred. 

We do not mean in thought and affection to sepa- 
rate such praiseworthy parents in what we have to 
say : sure are we that every father will bless our 
endeavour to make the burden of the laborious 
mother lighter, her task more pleasant and easy, 
and her everyday path of duly less rugged and 
thorny. It is the feet of such as she is that " must 
ache and bleed beneath " her load : it is the ever- 
busy hands of such a mother that, " weak or strong," 
must work at her unceasing task through " such 
long years l" 



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GENEROSITY W LABOURING WoMEtt. 165 

Nor, near as the writer may be "to the wayside 
inn," shall he yield to any sense of weariness after 
having " toiled so much with voice and pen," but put 
his whole heart in his present effort to cheer and 
enlighten so many mothers who have the long road 
of life all before them. 

COURAGE AND GENKttOSITY OF LABO TIRING WOMEN. 

Those only who have gone habitually among the 
families of our labouring classes, who have their 
full confidence, and are initiated into all their secrets, 
can know what treasures of goodness, of generosity, 
of courage, and patience are concealed by! the homely 
or patched garb of a mother with five or six mouths 
to feed, and not always a crown a day to count on 
for rent, clothing, and other incident expenses in the 
poorest of homes. While we write these lines, such 
is the outlook in the households of most labouring 
men of this great metropolis and the adjacent cities. 
Such, if we mistake not, is the hard lot of most 
fathers and mothers in manufacturing centres, and 
all through the Eastern States. 

And this has been the condition of the labouring 
man among us for years, and such the miserable 
pittance from out which his wife has had to provide 
necessaries and comforts for the entire family, with 
something also for the poor and the Church ! If 
persons more favoured by fortune and unvisited by 
such pinching want as is described in this simple 
statement ever felt disposed to blame such a mother, 
or to turn away with loathing from the inevitable 



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166 THE MIKHOIt OF TltUE WOMANHOOD. 

squalor in home, and dress, and countenance of these 
toilers for our comfort and luxury, let them pause 
and reflect. 

There is more of heroio endurance in the heart of 
such a parent than in the bosom of the bravest sol- 
dier in a beleaguered and famished city. There is 
in such a life of incessant battling with the wants of 
the day and the hour, with the fears of what the 
morrow may bring forth, a fortitude and perseverance 
far above our sterile admiration. When one has 
seen much of such homes and such hearts, one be- 
gins to understand why the soul of the Master went 
forth to these toilers with this sublime exordium of 
his first recorded discourse : " Blessed are the poor 
in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven ! w 
This was to point their eyes heavenward to the cer- 
tain prospect of a rest and a reward which the pre- 
sent could not afford. But He would not have them 
devoid, amid their long and ever-recurring daily 
struggle, of the sweetest consolation and most coveted 
recompense of generous souls. " Come to me, all 
you that labour, and I will refresh you 1" 

DIVINE AID IN DIRE NEED. 

In such a family, and during a long and severe 
winter, when labour was scarce, provisions dear, and 
charity as frozen as the lakes and rivers, a poor 
father of seven children fell on the ice, while returning 
home after dark, and broke his leg. His youngest 
babe was but six weeks old, and the mother was 
in very feeble health. It was thought, inflammation 
having set in, that the fractured member would have 



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DIVINE AID IS DIBE NEED, 



1C7 



to be cut off ; but the poor sufferer would not consent 
to the operation till he had made his confession. 
What a spectacle was that poor home, when the 
priest, following the oldest child, a boy of eleven, 
reached the door at midnight duriag a fierce snow- 
storm ! A loft or garret served as a sleeping-room 
for the elder children, and the lower part of the 
wooden shanty contained a little kitchen in front, with 
a bedroom for father and mother behind it. There 
were three physicians, one of whom was a surgeon, 
present and awaiting impatiently the arrival of the 
priest. The house was a picture of neatness, and the 
bedroom, especially, in which the poor sufferer lay, 
was like an oratory, curtained with spotless white, 
with a large and very old engraving of Christ carry- 
ing his cross, by Raphael, over the bed, and so 
placed that the patient might look at it. The wife, 
overcome with grief, struggled hard, when the 
priest entered, to keep back her tears. After the 
usual salutations and a few words of comfort to her- 
self and her husband, the latter, seizing the priest's 
hand, exclaimed, as he looked towards the picture : 
" Father, I know that He will be with me and with 
her, too ! That beautiful face has been like a book 
to me for many a year : I could look on it forever ! 
But, sure, I know" — and the speaker's voice trembled 
with emotion — " that the real face is more beautiful 
than the sun, and that the heart we were all taught to 
come to is one that will pity the poor man . . . and the 
widow . . . (here he broke down). . . . and the 
little orphans." Even the stern face of the surgeon 
quivered with an emotion he could not suppress 
while these sentiments were uttered in a firm, 
low tone. 

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168 THE M IRUOIl OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

During the operation, the children were taken to 
a neighbouring house, all but the infant, which re- 
mained with its mother, and she could not be per- 
suaded to leave the house, praying in the outside 
room with one of the neighbouring women. Ether was 
then in common use, but the sick man would not 
take it: he held, instead, the priest's crucifix in 
both hands, which the physicians left free, and with 
his eyes intensely fixed on the thorn-crowned head, 
while the inner sight seemed to behold somewhat of the 
divine reality, the sufferer gave himself up to the 
surgeon. Not a murmur escaped the silently moving 
lips, till towards the end, when the pain wrung one 
groan from him, and his head fell back in a swooi* 
on the priest* s shoulder. 

A few days afterwards a crisis came, and the 
worst was feared. The last sacraments were admin- 
istered — the wife seeming to have gained sud- 
den and preternatural strength from the very ex- 
tremity to which her brave husband was reduced. 
" She knew," she assured the priest, ere he left the 
house, " that God would not try her further : some- 
thing whispered to her heart that her good man 
would be left to her." He was, as usual, heroic in his 
calm submission to the Divine Will : only — such were 
his words— he prayed to be left alittle longer with 
his young children. The picture (*' The Spasimo 99 
of Eaphael) had been taken down from the wall and 
lay on the white covering of the bed, and the beauti- 
ful face of the humiliated Eedeemer was the book in 
which the sick man read night and day. 

The next morning the priest returned, expecting 
to hear that all was over. But, to his unspeakable 



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TREASURES TO BE FOUND, ETO. 169 

flurprise, the wife met him on the threshold with 
countenance all aglow with rapturous gratitude, and 
said that her husband was better. 4< Oh ! so much 
better ! " It was wonderful. The patient had slept 
sweetly, had even lost consciousness while gazing 
at his loved picture, and dreamed that Christ had 
come to him as he lay sore, and weary, and faint by 
the roadside, and had smiled on him, blessed him, 
and shown him the gap in his own side, and then 
disappeared. 

So, when the burden was heaviest on these stricken 
ones, He who bade us go to Him in our extremity, 
and who yearns to reward our faith, even by miracles 
# when needful, had stretched out his hand and opened 
'his heart to the call of that husband and that wife. 

Theirs was a long and a brave battle thenceforward. 
But every trial seemed light to souls so near to God. 
The brave man applied himself to learn a trade — 
he had been hitherto a stevedore; and, though there 
was never surplus of money or of creature-comforts 
in that home, there was contentment, and love 
purified in the furnace, and noble children to gladden 
the hearts of struggling parents, and that piety which 
seemed as natural as the very air they breathed: 

TREASURES TO BE FOUND IK TUB POOREST HOMES. 

Yes, there are poor homes, laborious homes, 
where from earliest dawn till night, and often far 
into the night, the wife and mother has to work, work, 
work, without cessation or repose, to do the house- 
work, and, that done, to complete 6ome other task 
from the outside, in order to help the ill-paid hus- 
band to keep off or pay off debts, to have decent rai- 



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170 THB MIHEOR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

ment for the good man and his children, to keep soma 
at least of these at school, to have substantial food for 
all, and something for the need of the suffering poor, 
who know well her door as well as her heart : — and 
such mothers believe that God's eye is ever on them- 
selves and their dear ones, that his blessed angels are 
there counting every hour and minute of that loving 
toil, counting every beat of these generous hearts, 
every moment so well filled, and ascending at 
night to lay the record of such a day before Him 
who said, "Blessed are the poor ! . . . For theirs is 
the kingdom of heaven ! " 

Blood tells, it is said, when noble deeds are to be 
performed — that is, perhaps, when the eyes of men 
watch the performance ; but there is inherited piety, 
which is a something nobler still — the supernatural 
piety of Christians. Are we not born, in our second 
sacramental birth, of the blood of a God-man? 
Think of this, brave-hearted mothers, and remember 
it is that blood which is applied to us in every grace 
we receive, and which strengthens us to do the work 
before us. 

Your boys, your girls, must be trained early to be 
industrious. Not that they must be set to work 
before their time ; God forbid ! But it must be your 
care to give them, from the very beginning, habits 
of cleanliness, order, industry, self-respect, and self- 
reliance. You must be careful not to allow them to 
fancy for one moment that there is in your own 
laborious habits, or in their father's occupation or 
trade, anything that is not most honourable, praise- 
worthy, and pleasing to God, 



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KNOW HOW TO PRAISE THEM. 171 



TEACH YOTJB CHILD REN THE DIGNITY 07 LABOUR. 

Beoall to them frequently that the most glorious 
names in heaven or on earth were those of men and 
women whose daily life was one of toil like your own : 
how Adam, and the great patriarchs who succeeded 
him, were tillers of the soil, husbandmen, and shep- 
herds ; that such were the great men and women who 
founded God's people in the Old Law — Abraham and 
Sara, Isaac and Eebecca, Israel (or Jacob) and his 
wife, EacheJ, Joseph, who ruled Egypt after having 
been, like his brothers, a farmer and a shepherd, as 
well as Moses, the figure of our Lord, who kept the 
flocks of his father-in-law. Labour was most 
honoured, always, down to the days of our Lord, who 
Himself learned the carpenter's trade, and worked 
at it with his foster-father, Joseph, a prince of the 
royal blood of David, 

Teach them to look upon idleness as a shame and 
disgrace, upon sloth as most degrading, and as lead- 
ing to all manner of evil courses. You can always 
keep them joyous children, while you make them 
industrious and laborious children ; you can make 
them and keep them bright, pleasant-faoed, and 
cheerful, while coaxing them to learn something new 
every day, and to apply themselves heartily to the 
tasks you set for them at the appointed hours. 

KNOW HOW TO PRAISE THEM. 

We have already seen what good a true wife can 
do by praising generously and judiciously her hus- 
band, and encouraging him thereby to rise every day 
higher and higher in her esteem and in his own. 



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172 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMAN'TOOD. 

Far greater is the good sho can do everyone of her 
children by judicious praise. We say "judicious/' 
for praise bestowed at every moment and for trifles 
loses its value by becoming common. Praise only 
when something is done which deserves it, and praise 
in well-weighed words. Never give praise when it 
is not well deserved; for then it would be unjust, 
and you would make your children suspect your 
truthfulness and your honesty. 

BE GENTLE, LOW-VOICED, AND PATIENT. 

Be gentle. That does not mean to be spiritless. 
It means to be the opposite of violent, irascible, ill- 
tempered, and moody. Study to be so, for your own 
soul's sake, and as if you lived in God's presence 
always keeping down, for his holy love, every move- 
ment of anger, irritability, ill-temper, or moodiness. 
And be gentle, precisely because you have much to 
do, much to bear, many cares to burden you, many 
things which continually try your temper. 

Be low-voiced. It is wonderful what effect a 
mother's gentle manner and low voice, when she 
teaches, or corrects, or praises, will have on a band of 
children. Take a school- room filled with very young 
boys or girls. Let their teacher be nervous, fidgety, 
and irritable ; you will see all these little ones thrown 
into a ferment, and fever, and agitation, which is 
nothing more than a kind of disorder which they 
catch from the teacher's manner. Let her be loud- 
voiced, teaching, or speaking in loud, quick, nervous 
tones, and it is ten to one but you will see within a 
few minutes all these children becoming restless, 
talkative, inattentive, and ungovernable. 



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BE GENTLE, LOW- VOICED, AND PATIENT. 173 

Now, let some gentle, quiet, calm-mannered, and 
low-voiced person come in, and all these children will 
become quieted, stop talking, listen, and be ready to 
give their whole attention to what is said, or to set 
to work, and work steadily as long as the calm eye 
is on them, and the gentle, low voice is directing 
them. 

You will spare yourselves and your dear ones much 
trouble and much unhappiness by laying this lesson 
to heart. You can do what you like with them, if 
you are perfectly mistress of yourself. Besides, 
what a service you do them ; and how they will bless 
their mother in after-life for having taught them 
this gentleness ! 

Be patient, not only when you are suffering from 
aching limbs, and head, and heart, but when you do not 
succeed in making your dear ones all that you would 
wish. There are certain dispositions and characters 
which seem naturally to defy all control, or teaching, 
or improvement. They will learn more than you 
think ; and they profit much more than you can see 
by your lessons, and especially by your example. 
Even should son or daughter of yours turn out to be 
everything but what you trained them to be, the 
memory of their gentle, patient, loving mother will 
remain in their souls to their dying day, like a silent 
voice from the past bidding them return to God, and 
to the paths of their childhood. 

Some say that steel beaten into its due form, and 
given a keen edge while cold, is more apt to preserve 
both form and edge for ever. So is it with the 
temper your patient gentleness will impart to your 
children's souls. And this firmness, which is only 



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THE MIRROR 07 TRUE WOMANHOOD* 



one of the most precious dispositions of true manhood 
and womanhood, will be both of infinite value to 
them, and of indispensable necessity. 

IN WHAT CONSISTS TRUE INDEPENDENCE OF 
CHARACTER. 

To no one more than the child of the hard-working 
mother is true independence of soul— that is, true 
nobility of character — necessary and useful. Indeed, 
the all-seeing Author of our nature, who governs all 
our ways, has made every element of greatness in 
our souls and conduct necessary, because he knew 
they would be useful ; and he made them all the 
more necessary that he foresaw they would be more 
useful. 

In what does this independence of soul and 
character consist ? In this : that a boy or a girl 
brought up by a truly God-fearing mother, is so 
filled with the fear of that Great Majesty, in whose 
hands we are at every moment, and into whose hands 
we are sure to fall after death, that they look up to 
Him in everything, seek to please Him in all they do, 
and find it impossible to do anything whit h i wrong 
in his sight, and contrary to the voice of their own 
conscience. 

Let us understand this well You rear your boy 
and your girl, from the very first moment you can 
make them understand anything, in the conviction 
that God's truth, God's word, God's will is to be the 
sole measure by which they are to weigh and esti- 
mate everything ; so that it will be practically im- 
possible for them to do anything contrary to his truth, 
his law, or his will. We say every day that such a 



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IN DEPENDING ON GOD ALONE. 175 



man is a noble man, a truly independent man, be- 
cause he is incapable of doing wrong to anyone, of 
violating truth, or honour, or honesty, of going, in 
anything whatever, against his conscience and his 
known duty. 

Hence it is, and this is the golden lesson which our 
forefathers learned so well and practised so nobly, 
that they made their moral greatness and indepen- 
dence consist. 

IN DEPENDING ON GOD ALONE AND THEIE CONSCIENCE. 

They were poor in this world's goods ; for they 
had been stripped of everything : they were deprived 
of civil and religious liberty, and honour, and were 
thus, in the eyes of men, degraded to the level of 
the serf or the slave. But nothing could shake their 
dependence on God, or their implicit and invincible 
obedience to the voice of their conscience and their 
faith. 

Now, such are the noble men and women that can 
in our days, in this generation as in the next, go 
forth from the home of every labouring man among 
us, as they went forth in past generations : men 
attached to conscience, to honesty, to honour, to 
truth, to duty, to righteousness, and to God, in all 
things, and above all things, everywhere, in all em- 
ployments and positions, though never so high or 
never so lowly. 

Let us have men and women incapable of telling a 
lie, of wronging the neighbour in thought, or word, 
or deed, of wronging their employer in the meanest 
trifles or the weightiest matters, of betraying the 
trust placed in them, whether in the last place in 



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176 THE MTBttOR OP TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



lowliest office, or in the highest that can be given in 
city, State, or Church — men and women who fear 
God alone, and, after Him, fear only what is contrary 
to truth, honour, and purity ! 

Dear mothers who read this, you may never be 
able to give your boys and girls, at your death, 
wherewith to buy a suit of clothes, or to pay for 
their meals on the morrow. But if you laboured 
morning, noon, and night, till your dying day — be- 
cause you would allow no dishonesty to taint your lives, 
and for the sole purpose of making of your children 
such godlike men and women as this— you have left 
them a treasure ten thousand times more precious 
than all the hoarded millions of our wealthiest. 

MAKE THEM CHOOSE THEIR COMPANIONS WELL. 

In order to do this, you must be careful about two 
things: the choice of what your boys and girls 
read ; and that of their companions at home, or in 
the street. 

Choose well the books which you put in their 
hands, or which you permit them to bring horn ewith 
them. Public libraries are like druggists' shops or 
public dispensaries ; they are like them in this, that 
they contain all manner of poisons as well as health- 
ful medicines ; and they differ from them in this, 
that, whereas conscientious druggists will give what 
is healthful to all, they will only deal out what is 
poisonous in small quantities, and to responsible and 
properly authorised persons; while libraries and 
librarians have no conscience, and let the innocent 
child take away and devour what kills purity, inno- 
cence, and conscience forever. 



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CHOOSE THEIR COMPANIONS WELL. 177 

Soaroely less baneful are, taken and read promis- 
cuously, the daily and weekly papers. They are not 
only dangerous and hurtful to the young mind and 
heart as mere newspapers, because they reveal in 
their hideousness and obscenity what should never 
"be known to youth, and what were better ignored by 
age itself ; but they are still more hurtful as teachers 
and dogmatisers on religion and morality, either 
reducing the doctrines and practices of revealed 
religion to the same level with infidelity, and thus 
producing practical indifference towards divine truth, 
or they affect, and profess to have an authority 
which can judge the Church of Christ herself, and 
enlighten her as to the way she ought to teach, 
and to govern. 

Thereby the mind is imperceptibly, but inevitably, 
filled with prejudices or preconceived opinions dis- 
trustful of the Church, or hostile to her, and which 
act on the intelligence as the foul and poisonous air 
of coal mines acts on the lungs : they fill the organs 
with deadly exhalations, which prevent the entrance 
into them of God's pure vital air. 

Just as you are careful of what books or papers 
your children read, even so be watchful over the 
companionships they form. It is impossible to take 
kindly to the low-minded, corrupt-hearted, or ill-bred 
and ill-mannered, without laying aside one's own 
good manners, good breeding, purity of feeling, 
and innocence of mind in habitual intercourse 
with them. There are worse consequences, as you 
know, which soon follow this familiarity with the 
low and the unworthy. 

Precisely because the great majority of young 
13 



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178 Tin? MTTWOH OF TRUE WOMANHOOD, 

people around you are without sound moral educa- 
tion, untruthful, intemperate, and as careless of 
honour and honesty as they are of decency, it is your 
most pressing interest and duty to keep your treasures 
away from such contact. 



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SIMPLICITY IS DRESS AND SOBltlETY IN FOOD. 179 



CHAPTER XL 

HOW MOTHERS SHOULD TRAIN THEIR BOYS AND 
GIRLS (CONTINUED). 

The best preservative against the dangerous ambi- 
tion described in our last is found in the super- 
natural notions and virtues which a Christian mother 
is careful to inculcate from the earliest dawn of 
reason in her children. We insist once more upon it ; 
the royal and rich poverty of Christ, of his Mother, 
and of his foster-father, J oseph, must be made the 
theme of constant remark and praise in the homes of 
tradesmen and labouring men. And, next to that, the 
mother must fill the souls of her little ones with that 
scorn and loathing of all dishonesty and untruthful- 
ness, which will, with the ever-present aid of grace, 
render them incapable of telling a lie, or wronging 
any person, no matter how slightly. 

CHILDREN TO BE TAUGHT SIMPLICITY IN DRE8S AND 
SOBRIETY IN FOOD. 

This is another golden rule to be enforced early. 
Nor need we, while the passion for rich attire, showy 
ornaments, and jewellery is developed so precociously 
in our girls, and allowed by mothers to grow unre- 
pressed and unrebuked, point out how timely and 
needful this rule is. 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



A venerable lady, who died in November, 1870, in 
her seventy-second year, and who came of the best 
blood of England, wrote thus, in her last years, of 
her early training : " The dress of these days (about 
1806) was very different to that which children have 
now. My white frocks were of lawn or Irish cloth, 
without any work or ornament ; and when I went 
out I used to wear a little green-baize coat. My 
food was also of the simplest kind, consisting princi- 
pally of buttermilk and potatoes."* 

The girlhood trained in these habits of simplicity 
and wholesome austerity led to a lovely womanhood, 
to a life of spotless devotion to duty, and to the 
exercise of these private graces and influences which, 
enable a woman, ever living in the privacy of her 
home, to win the admiration, the respect, and the 
veneration of all who approach her. We quote her 
words and her example to show how women were 
brought up in the days of our fathers, and how little 
difference, even in Protestant homes, the deep-seated 
Christian customs of so many preceding centuries 
allowed to prevail in the dress, the food, and all the 
external training of children in all classes. 

Mothers in those days, who wished to do their duty 
conscientiously by their children, did not dream of 
having for them in the beginning any teachers but 
themselves. So was it with this lady's mother; al- 
though prostrated by paralysis and consumption, she 
would daily teach her little girl. 

" She taught me in all my lessons except French, 
but her weak health and bad headaches often pre- 

* Augustus J. 0. Hare, u Memorials of a Quiet Life," vol 
i., p. 6. 



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181 



vented her hearing me, and many a time I had to 
stand outside her door waiting till I could be heard, 
which fretted me a good deal. When the lessons 
went ill, I was sentenced to sit on the staircase till I 
was good, and the task perfect. I imagine that 
though my mother was most gentle, she was firm in 
her management of me." Some lady-friend having 
" suggested my doing something because it would be 
pleasant, my mother appealed to me, 1 I think my little 
girl has a better motive for it. What is it, Mia?' and 
' Because it is right,' was my reply."* 

HOW EARLY THE SENSE OF DUTY— OP RIGHT AND 
WRONG, IS FOUND IN CHILDREN. 

The answer given by the child shows how early 
what philosophers call "the moral sense" is deve- 
loped in a child, in little girls especially, whose intel- 
ligence is so much more precocious than that of boys, 
and whose sense of right and wrong is much quicker 
and keener. The sick, hopelessly sick and infirm 
mother here mentioned, while cultivating her child's 
memory and understanding by teaching her the usual 
elementary branches, was careful to form her judg- 
ment by making her, in all things, act for a purpose, 
and to develop her moral sense by giving her, in all 
she did, the notion of duty, as her stimulant in doing 
both pleasant and unpleasant things. 

THE MORAL 8EN>E IS BUT THE SENSE OF DUTY. 

Duty is the fulfilling of an obligation towards one's 
self , or towards another in compliance with his will, 

* Ibidem, p. 4. 



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182 THE MTRBOB 07 TBUE WOMANHOOD. 

wlio, being Creator and Lord, has a right to bind our 
wills to do certain things and refrain from others. 

Duty is always towards God, even when the imme- 
diate object of the action performed is only one's 
self, or one's neighbour. The very duty of cultivat- 
ing mind and heart, which regards every intelligent 
being, is a duty imposed by the Divine Will ; so is 
the obligation to keep one's soul and body free from 
every defilement. We own it to be a duty to learn, 
to know clearly and fully what concerns our condition, 
our profession, or the office we may hold in Church 
or State, and a corresponding duty to live up to this 
indispensable knowledge. But Christian philosophy 
teaches us that in acquiring this knowledge, and in 
acting up to it, we are only doing what is due to Him 
who has an essential right to every thought and aim 
and act of ours. 

Uprightness is the perfect performance of duty; 
and uprightness, in its Christian and supernatural 
meaning, is the perfect discharge of duty in view of 
Him who is our Lord and Judge and final Beatitude. 
The firm look of the soul, in every act of duty, or in 
the gratuitous generosity with which the sons of God 
go beyond what is of obligation— is upward to God. 

CULTIVATE THIS SENSE OF DUTY 

in all your children. Make them understand tha 
they are to do certain things most unpleasant, and 
to abstain from other things most pleasant, because 
it is right to do so ; because it is their duty ; because 
this is due to their great and good God. Expe- 
rience has taught that of all characters, in men as 
well as in women, the most trustworthy, the most 



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THE HEARTS OP YOUR CHILDREN. 183 



honoured, the most noble in the estimation of man- 
kind, is the man or woman -who always acts accord- 
ing to this sense of duty, and whom no love, no fear, 
no passion, or temptation can turn aside to do 
wrong — that is, what is contrary to duty and con- 
science. 

If mothers will only accustom their children to 
act, not according to their inclinations, but in obe- 
dience to this sense of duty, pointing out what is 
right to do and what is wrong not to do, they will 
buckle round them a suit of armour which will enable 
them to come victorious out of the terrible battle of 
temptation. And never was this noble sense of duty 
more needed than in our day, when men think 
little of right or wrong, and a good deal of the surest 
and quickest road to success ; and when, in the esti- 
mation of our public, success once attained makes 
the wrong right, while failure makes right itself 
wrong, and the sacrifice to duty foolish sentimen- 
tality. 

CULTIVATE THE HEARTS OP YOUR CHILDREN. 

This is more particularly needful in the case of 
your girls. 

It is by the right or wrong in their affections that 
women become so powerful for good or evil. Not 
that their intelligence is naturally inferior to that of 
men ; on the contrary, in many respects the female 
intellect is remarkably superior. Intelligence dawns 
earlier in girls, and ripens at a very precocious 
age. Hence the wisdom of cultivating the judgment 
and forming the imagination of girls during their 
fifth, sixth, and seventh years. One will often be 



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184 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMAIfHOOD. 



astonished in conversing with a little girl of that age, 
on questioning her closely, to see (when she has been 
carefully watched by an intelligent and virtuous 
mother) how completely she will master the great 
scheme of the creation, the fall, the redemption and 
reparation, the necessity of a visible and infallible 
teaching authority, the beauty of the sacramental 
system of help towards all the purposes of the super- 
natural life in the individual soul as well as in the 
body of the Church. All this can be made so clear 
and so attractive to the childish intellect, without 
wearying it with theological terms or definitions. 

The idea of God is connatural to the mind, as 
well as that of his providence, of moral good and 
evil, of rewards and punishments. No child but can 
be made to ascend from the familiar notion of her 
father's house, well governed by firm laws, by love 
tempered with justice, to the great family of na- 
tions under one Almighty Euler and Judge. These 
and a thousand other notions are so quickly taken in 
by the youngest girl, that one is reminded forcibly 
of the famous theories about innate ideas. 

It is impossible in a really Christian family that 
the head should be wrong if the heart is right. The 
teaching of the Church is so complete, embraces in 
one firm grasp our origin in the past, our duties in 
the present, and our prospects for all time and eter- 
nity ; our doctrines are so positive, so clear, so satis- 
factory, and so comprehensive that they set the mind 
at rest, and thereby leave the soul free to direct and 
control its own affections. 

Generally speaking, boys and girls in Catholic 
families have such a clear sense both of what they 



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CULTIVATE THE HEARTS OF YOUK CHILDREN. 185 

have to believe and what they have to do, that when 
they are led astray it is by their affections. 

We have explained in the preceding chapter how 
mothers are to win and to keep the love of their boys 
and girls. This is one necessary step towards culti- 
vating their hearts and training their affections. 
You cannot repair or beautify the interior of a house 
unless you secure an entrance and be in so far the 
master in it that no one shall disturb you while you 
are occupied in your labour. The heart has been 
endowed by its Maker with so mysterious and so 
great a power, that even a babe in arms can shut 
its heart against its own parent, and that a child of 
seven can form, rightly or wrongly, likings and dis- 
likings which may last a lifetime. 

It is for the mother to study from the very begin- 
ning the dispositions of her precious charge. We say 
commonly that some natures are richly endowed, and 
others but poorly ; that some persons are all head 
and no heart, while others are all heart and no head. 
That is to say, there are souls in which the intellec- 
tual powers seem to predominate and to absorb into 
themselves the affective powers; while there are 
others in whom the affections seem to run away with 
the understanding and the judgment. 

There is some truth and a good deal of exaggera- 
tion in these estimates which we pride ourselves in 
forming of the innate faculties of children as well 
as of grown-up persons. Doubtless, through some 
physical accident of formation, or birth, the brain 
may be affected and the reasoning powers partially 
or almost totally paralysed ; but there is no instance 
of this total paralysis of the will or the executive 



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186 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

and affective powers in the soul where the mind re- 
tains its full vigour unimpaired. Some persons are 
less sensitive, less affectionate, less imaginative, less 
passionate than others ; but in all persons of sane 
mind there is imagination, and sensibility, and affec- 
tions, and passions, though in very different degrees 
of intensity. 

Now where a faculty or special power in the soul 
is known to exist, it can be developed, strengthened, 
increased almost indefinitely by exercise and proper 
culture ; just as a faculty neglected either dies out 
or lives on in a sort of rudimentary condition for 
want of proper exercise. The hand and arm of one 
man becomes as terrible an instrument of destruction 
as the arm of the tiger, by long muscular training. 
While another man, though more powerfully built 
by nature, will have a hand as soft as a babe's, and 
an arm as feeble as a girl's, from the absolute lack 
of exercise. "Women, above all other persons, are 
familiar with the success which so often attends the 
cultivation and development of the voice, and how 
young persons, seemingly deficient in all aptitude for 
singing, will exhibit, under careful culture and prac- 
tice, the most splendid vocal powers. 

"heartlessness" the effect of a wrong 
education. 

There is no such thing as natural heartlessness. 
Cold as certain grown-up women, as well as men, seem 
to be by nature, we may be certain that neither 
nature nor its Author is to blame for this lack of 
genial warmth and affection. No child is born with- 
out the disposition to love and the power of loving 



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187 



warmly : this may be not so apparent at the surface 
in some children as in others, or exist in the same 
degree of energy; or, again, this coldness in some 
may be only such as contrasted with the passionate 
and impulsive fervour of others. But let mothers 
rest assured that the heart is there, with its natural 
and essential powers of returning love for love, and 
of practising, not only the virtue of supernatural 
charity so indispensable to the sanctity and salvation 
of the adult Christian, but all the other charities of 
private and public life, with the many virtues which 
never fail to adorn the soul in which true charity 
reigns. Indeed were it possible (which is not so) 
that any human being could be born without natural 
affection, the Creator Spirit, coming into the soul in 
baptism, would most surely repair the defect. 

But comparatively feeble (and we use this expres- 
sion most reluctantly) as the power of loving may 
be supposed to be, it is there in the soul for the 
mother's tender hand and fostering charity to nurse 
into fulness of life, into perfect bloom and fruitful 
maturity. And God's abundant and unfailing help 
is secured to the mother in this training of her child's 
heart. 

But the real heartlessness which shows itself so 
offensively in the girl and in the woman is, you may 
be sure of it, the result of neglect in the parent, or of 
a training in every way vicious. 

For this heartlessness is but undisguised selfishness 
obtruding itself upon us in all its own repulsive de- 
formity. The mother's eye had failed to detect this 
weed in her child's soul, or allowed it to grow up 
during infancy and girlhood, under the delusive 



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188 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

hope that; the good qualities in her girl's nature 
would ohoke out the bad when she grew up to 
womanhood. But it is the contrary which happens, 
unless God should interfere and perform a miracle 
in favour of the neglected or petted child. Selfish- 
ness is pretty sure, when continually ministered to 
and nursed by all around it, to absorb and draw to 
itself all the vital energies of the soul. 

In the tropical forests, in the West Indies particu- 
larly, there is a formidable species of parasite creeper 
whose power becomes fatal to the mightiest trees in 
the forest. It first shows itself like a little green 
plant on a sturdy branch of the forest tree, or in a 
hole in the trunk, whence it sends down thread-like 
feelers to the ground. There they take root, and 
reascend along the trunk, increasing in number and 
size, till not one feature of the parent tree is visible. 
The whole is now enclosed in a network of serpentine 
forms so firm, so robust, and so vigorous, that the 
tiny plant has become a giant, strangling in its em- 
brace the generous trunk which fed and supported 
it, and hanging high in mid-air, above the topmost 
branches of its dead benefactor, its brilliant clusters 
of flowers. Thus does selfishness prosper and 
flourish 1 

EXAMPLES OF HEARTLES8NE88. 

In a family noted for high culture, refinement, 
and deep religious faith, the death of a father brought 
to his home a near relative, a venerable lady of most 
exemplary life and unselfish devotion to the good of 
others. Indeed, this noble generosity of soul had 
prevented her from accepting when young, beautiful, 



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EXAMPLES OF BEABTLE88NE8S. 



189 



and accomplished, the many offers of marriage made 
to her, prompting her to give her whole existence to 
the comfort and happiness of her nephews and 
nieces. 

She had been looked up to by the dead man with 
that union of respect and love which we call venera- 
tion, and his wife shared these sentiments. Their 
respected relative had come to the widow in her 
bereavement, to offer consolation which no other 
could, and to spend, as was the religious oustom of 
her country, the night before the burial in praying 
beside the dead. Her arrival was greeted with 
heartfelt gratitude by all the mourners, save one, a 
girl of thirteen or fourteen, who was busy, when the 
visitor arrived, in dressing a doll for some little girl 
of the neighbourhood. The presence of death in the 
house, the grief which overwhelmed her mother and 
sisters, found this girl perfectly callous; the out- 
burst of emotion with which their cherished relative 
was received did not move her in the least, or only 
caused her to look up with an air of annoyance from 
her self-imposed task of sewing. Presently her 
mother begged her to go and help to prepare a room 
for their aunt. But at this interruption she flew into 
a rage, and, in the hearing of the aged and sensitive 
lady herself, the selfish vixen burst forth : "What on 
earth brings this old woman here ? I am sure she is 
not wanted" . . • and other such amenities. 
The wound which these cruel words caused was a 
deep one, and was never healed in that most gene- 
rous heart. They filled it with forebodings which 
she hardly ventured to breathe into the ear of any 
member of the family. 



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190 THE MTRBOR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD, 

They were, however, not to remain unfulfilled. 
She was the youngest child, petted, indulged, spoiled. 
Her natural selfishness blighted and overtopped 
every other quality in her character. When its 
fearful manifestations alarmed both parents, the weak 
mother attempted in vain to check what was now 
utterly beyond her control. The heartless girl be- 
came the more heartless woman, without affection for 
husband or children ; without a particle of love for 
her mother or her sisters. She has divided, 
darkened, and ruined the home which her too fond 
father had laboured so hard to render happy and 
bright for all his dear ones. 

Were the bitter fruits of heartlessness to be tasted 
only by the parents through whose criminal neglect 
and indulgence grew up the evil plant which bore 
them, it would be a most just retribution. But the 
heartless woman proves a bane and a destroyer to 
others, as well as a heart-sore to her parents and 
nearest relatives. 

Where, with this most odious form of selfishness 
in a woman, she also possesses the terrible gift of 
beauty, she becomes a curse to every man who falls 
under the fatal spell of her fair face. Love she can- 
not, for love, being the gift of self, is impossible to the 
heartless and selfish. The vanity, begotten of the 
selfishness which is conscious of the charm of beauty, 
only yearns for admiration, and gloats on every fresh 
addition to the number of admirers. The pains 
endured by the thrice-foolish men who allow them- 
selves to believe in the warmth of a heartless 
woman's smiles, or to trust to her promises, are of no 
account to her. We remember once to have seen a 



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191 



gigantio ivy all in bloom on a part of the ruined walls 
of Laon. The odour of its flowers is so sweet, and 
the nectar which they distil so intoxicating, that the 
flowering mass was covered with a cloud of various 
insects which struggled and fought for a taste of the 
delicious food, while the earth beneath was covered 
with the carcases of countless victims. 

THE PUNISHMENT OF HEARTLESSNESS. 

The selfish and heartless make no friends, for they 
cannot inspire anyone who knows them with that 
enlightened esteem and solid respect which are the 
first requisites for true love in any being. Christian 
theology, when well analysed, shows that the greatest 
torment of the damned is not only the loss of God, 
and of the blissful eociety of heaven, but the being 
placed eternally face to face with one's self — with 
that self which is the creation of one's own will, the 
work of one's own hands. And, while yet on earth, 
the most terrible torture of the utterly selfish woman 
(say the same of man) is, when admiration and en- 
joyment have passed away, to find herself in presence 
of herself^ of her own false and hollow heart. This 
is the hell of the heartless, even in this life. 

But one or two other examples of this monstrous 
perversity in the moral formation of certain persons 
may contain an instructive lesson for more classes 
than one. 

A HBARTLE88 WIFE AND A MORE HEARTLESS HUSBAND. 

Two young people had married early in their 
native country, with the understanding that the 
husband would go forthwith to America, and there 



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THE IflRBOB OP TROT WOMANHOOD. 



provide for his young wife the home which the mis- 
fortune of the times and the circumstances of the 
country made it impossible to obtain at home. 

A few months after his departure, however, his 
wife was induced by a neighbouring family, who 
were going to New York, to take passage with them, 
thinking in her simple heart that, once in the great 
city, she could find her husband as easily as in her 
native village. 

The poor little woman's disappointment and dismay 
on her arrival here can be easily conceived. She 
was penniless, and no inquiries she could make 
availed to obtain tidings of her husband. After 
knocking at many doors she was directed, by the 
clergy of the Nativity, in Second Avenue, to a family 
up town, ever ready to interest themselves in cases 
of distress. So one morning, the mistress of the 
house found in her waiting-room a plainly but neatly 
dressed young person of striking beauty of counte- 
nance, " like one of these lovely Irish girls whom a 
painter would select for a Madonna." Her story 
was soon told. " Her husband had promised to send 
for her when he had got a little place for both, and 
she was to wait at home for his letter. But," . . . 
And here the young creature broke down. ,She told 
the kind, motherly lady, who questioned her most 
affectionately, that she was soon to become herself a 
mother, and her impatience to join her husband was 
very intelligible. She had found a protectress, 
however : a safe temporary home was provided for 
her, she was given sewing and other such work to do, 
and every care was taken of her welfare till her babe 
was born. " It was a most beautiful child," said our 



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informant, " and the happiness of its young mother 
would have been complete had the efforts made to 
discover her husband been successful." 

A few weeks after the birth of her child she called 
on her kind benefactress, and told her that she had 
been advised to go into some good family as a wet 
nurse, and had put for that purpose an advertisement 
in the daily papers. " I am sorry you • did so with- 
out consulting me, Mary," said her kind friend. 
" It is a thing I would never advise any mother to do ; 
and, besides, we could have found you plenty of good 
work to do, while attending to your babe." 

It was too late ; the persons with whom Mary was 
staying had persuaded her to this course, and the 
poor, inexperienced young thing hoped to gain money 
to help her struggling husband in his efforts to 
secure a home of their own. And then, again, she 
was assured that her babe would be well cared for in 
a family a little out of town, which they designated. 
And so the fatal step was taken. 

Mary was accepted as nurse in the family of a 
minister in Brooklyn, whose name, as well as the 
denomination to which he belonged, it is needless to 
mention. After some three weeks had elapsed, this 
gentleman called one day on Mary's New York bene- 
f actress, to inform her that he should have to part 
with the nurse. 

" Part with her ? " replied the other ; " why so ? 
are you not satisfied with her ?" " Oh, she is a very 
good woman : neat, quiet, respectful, very careful of 
our child ; and our family physician, after examining 
her, pronounces her a remarkably healthy person. 
But there are certain things about her we do not 
M 



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THE MIE10R OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



like/ 9 " When did you make up jour mind to part 
with her?" "The first week she came to us." 
"And you did not tell her of it then?" "No, 
because we have not been able to get a suitable 
person to take her place." " That seems unkind to 
her. She could have then returned to her own child 
in good time ; but now she will find that it has been 
weaned. • . • But, pray, what fault in her could 
have justified a [delay which, to say the least, is 
cruel?" "Oh! she moans in her sleep, and seems 
unhappy away from her child, and we do not want 
to have our babe nursed by anyone who seems un- 
happy." The lady gazed at him in utter astonish- 
ment, mixed with no little contempt for the heart- 
lessness of both himself and his wife. At length she 
said, indignantly : " Is it possible, sir, that you could 
expect any woman with a true mother's nature to be 
able to give up her own child, and give the nourish- 
ment she owed it to that of another mother, without 
feeling her heart breaking, or without moaning in 
her sleep?" He persisted in saying that he saw 
nothing to blame in his wife's or his own conduct. 
The feelings of poor Mary, or the fate of her babe, 
never cost either of them a thought. " At least," 
said the lady, as he rose to take his leave, "you 
must promise me to send Mary back to her babe at 
once; for to keep her longer in your house, or in 
ignorance of your intention, would be wrong and 
criminal." A promise was made, but was not kept. 
Mary was detained a week or ten days longer, and 
then dismissed with the heartless indifference which 
characterised the minister and his spouse. At least 
a full month had then elapsed since Mary had in- 



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trusted her beautiful babe to the out-of-town nurse, 
giving two-thirds of her wages to secure it every 
possible care and comfort. All this time she had 
not been permitted to visit it. 

Her feeling of joy at the prospect of seeing it 
overcame every other sentiment in her heart, and 
without a moment's delay she flew to its side. It 
was summer-time ; she found the woman with whom 
she had left her treasure dressed in the most 
slatternly fashion, and a baby, fat and rosy, fast 
asleep in a cradle. Poor Mary's heart sank within 
her, and a great faintness came over her as she 
looked about for her own. She dared not; indeed 
she could not inquire. . . . On a wooden wash- 
board she saw a dirty shawl in a bundle, and covered 
with flies, from which a feeble moan proceeded ; and 
going over, she found her babe lying neglected there, 
so emaciated and so feeble that it had not strength 
enough to cry for the food it needed. 

Of course, the unnatural monster with whom she 
had left it was confounded at the sudden apparition 
of the young mother. Had she waited a day or two 
longer it would have been out of pain, and soon 
buried away out of sight, and a story found to cover its 
slow murder. But poor Mary had no time to waste in 
explanation or accusations. She must save her child. 

Away she flew to her benefactress. She was at 
first unable to utter a single word, and the former 
thought the child was dead. But when she heard 
how the case was, " Go back instantly," she said, 
" and bring your baby here." While Mary had 
been in the service of the heartless minister and his 
unwomanly wife, the home to which Mary was 



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196 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

hastening to bring her dying child had been visited 
by death, and in the gentle mistress's own bedroom 
a cradle was empty, which she knelt by more than 
once each day to ask for strength from on high, and 
to beseech her little angel boy, among the choirs 
above, to protect his mother's home. 

That cradle was now prepared and decked for the 
stranger child. So when it arrived the entire house- 
hold was interested in helping the mistress to save 
the little starveling. A bath of spirits and water 
was ready, and when, with infinite tenderness, the 
noble-hearted lady had bathed it, she arrayed the 
little sufferer in her dead boy's most beautiful dress, 
and laid it in his cradle, while her daughters knelt 
around to look upon the tiny, feeble thing, and to 
pray that it might live. Who can paint the ecstasy 
of poor Mary as she too knelt by its side, and be- 
lieved that in the heavenly atmosphere of that room 
her babe must soon recover. 

Presently the great-hearted husband of her bene- 
factress returned from the courts, and on entering 
his wife's room was greeted with the words : " Oh, 
do come and see what I have got for you." The 
other approached the cradle, around which he saw 
his bright-faced children gazing delightedly, and the 
strange young woman absorbed in watching her sick 
infant. The tears filled the eyes of the Christian 
gentleman as he took in the full meaning of what he 
saw, and kneeling down reverently by the side of the 
cradle he kissed the sufferer there as he would the 
feet of the Divine Babe of Bethlehem. " Darling," 
he said to his wife, as he rose from his knees, " God 
will bless you for this !" 



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Meanwhile no time was lost in seeking a new posi- 
tion for Mary as nurse in a good family. Her infant 
could take no nourishment from her, and she was 
assured that where it was every care would be 
lavished on it. Indeed, it was thenceforth looked 
upon as the child of the house. Within a few days 
a gentleman called, in answer to the advertisement 
in the papers — a Mr. Kobinson — who felt both 
touched and deeply interested by what he heard of 
Mary, and by the genuine charity exercised towards 
her by her benefactress. But he would have Mary 
not separated from her own infant, and took it in 
the carriage with her to his home, where the little 
flame of life, which had flashed up fitfully under the 
loving care of a true mother, soon went out for ever. 

Will the reader ask, if from the home where that 
dying child was taken in and nursed as tenderly and 
reverently as if it had been the Babe cast out on the 
roadside at Bethlehem, true women and true men 
went forth in good season to gladden the souls of the 
generous mother, and the no less generous father, 
of whom we have had a glimpse ? We can answer : 
Ay, true men and true women every one of them, 
because their hearts had been trained from child- 
hood to the pursuit of everything that was unselfish, 
and devoted to the divine honour and the good of 
others. 

UNSELFISHNESS THE TREASURE OF THE LABOURING 
POOR. 

The directions here given will serve to warn 
mothers in the home of the labouring man, as well 
as in that of the most wealthy or well-born, against 



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198 THE MIIUIOK OF trub womanhood. 

the fatal fruits of their own neglect in cultivating 
the hearts of their children. Oh ! let mothers begin 
early to destroy in the souls of their dear ones every 
root and fibre of this dreadful bane of selfishness ! 
We have watched with admiration one mother, 
blessed in this respect with uncommon skill, accus- 
tom an infant to give back to her the toys which it 
fancied most. I was only the beginning of the 
golden habit of generosity, ever ready to take from 
self and give to others. Later the child was taught 
never to enjoy alone anything given to it as a play- 
thing or a dessert. Then, out of the first pennies 
received for pocket-money, it was made to give at 
least the greatest portion to the poor; while the 
most touching stories of other children's distress and 
suffering were told by the parent to awaken within 
the tender soul of infancy the sense of pity and the 
virtue of mercy by these pictures of woe often near 
at hand. And will not God aid and bless these in- 
dustries of motherly love ? 

Let us say it at once : the soil of the labourer's 
heart is one especially rich in the growth of all the 
divine virtues that claim kinship with generosity. 
No one knows it better than he whose hand writes 
these lines, and to whose memory so long and rich 
a record of the generous and heroio charity of the 
poor and the labouring classes is now vividly pre- 
sent. 

Whence has come the rich and seemingly exhaust- 
less fund out of which have arisen the Catholic 
churches, colleges, academies, convents, orphan-asy- 
lums, hospitals, and homes for the aged and infirm 
•which have sprung up in the English-speaking world 



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199 



within the last half century? Mainly from the 
scanty purse of the labouring man, from the very 
need of the poor man, and from the incredible gene- 
rosity of servant girls ! Within this great city of 
New York how many thrilling anecdotes could be 
told by every priest who has had to build a church, 
to found a school, or some institution of beneficence ! 

Let mothers see to it that this rich inheritance of 
generosity be transmitted to their children, to their 
daughters particularly, so that the coming genera- 
tion be as royal-hearted as that which went before it 

The blessed root of this undying generosity must 
be laid in the early love of Him who " also hath 
loved us, and hath delivered Himself for us, an obla- 
tion and sacrifice to God." This has been already 
insisted on in the preceding chapter, and it only re- 
mains that we should once more urge upon the at- 
tention of mothers the necessity of making their 
children do generously whatever they do for God, for 
their parents, their brothers and sisters, for the poor 
the widow, and the orphan. 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 



CHAPTEE XIX 

THE MOTHER'S OFFICE TOWARDS BOYHOOD AND GIRLHOOD. 
CULTURE OF THE HEART — (CONTINUED). 

Magnum donum Dei, donum corditf 
A great gift of God isthe gift of heart. 

St. Thomas Vi llano va. 

Wb have been like travellers on their way to the 
Pacific coast, borne swiftly along tracts most rich in 
treasures beyond all price, at which they could only 
glance through the narrow windows of their tempo- 
rary prison, as steam hurried them onward to their 
goal. Even though we should devote this entire 
volume to this beautiful and vast theme of the cul- 
ture of the heart in childhood and youth, we should 
be far from exhausting it ; and after travelling never 
so leisurely over the road, we should leave many rich 
underlying veins of thought and consideration un- 
touched and undiscovered. At least must we direct 
the attention of every mother who will follow our 
guidance to a few additional points. 

The heart of youth can be most truly likened to 
these rich deposits of mineral wealth which the hand 
of the Creator has accumulated for our use beneath 
the surface of this globe, or to the mighty elements 
of fire and water out of which the science of man is 
developing daily such beneficent or destructive forces. 
There is no limit to the wealth of goodness and 



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CULTURE OF THE HEART. 201 

generosity which lies hidden within the heart of any 
one of your boys or girls ; and this fund every mother 
has to study and bring to light, enriching therewith, 
first of all, the soul of her child, and then teaching 
it to bestow i$s treasures of goodness and generosity 
on others — on the members of the family circle first, 
and then on all who stand in need of generous words 
and deeds. There is more power for good stored up 
in the heart of a babe, power to lift itself upward 
to God by heroic goodness and godlike works, and 
to lift others with it to God's level, than there is 
of electric force in the ocean. And yet science tells 
us that a tiny cup full of water contains undeveloped 
electricity enough to blow up a fortress. 

The forces which education — the true education 
given by a Christian mother — calls forth in the soul 
of her child may be destined, in the designs and with 
the aid of God's almighty grace, to save and sanctify 
as many souls as St. Ignatius Loyola, St. Prancis 
Xavier, St. Vincent de Paul, or St. Teresa. These 
same forces, neglected or perverted by a wrong heart- 
culture, may destroy as many souls as a Lucifer or a 
Mazzini. 

Let not mothers who read this, no matter how 
poor or overburdened with care, say : My child is 
born in obscurity, and cannot be designed by Provi- 
dence for such a great work and such mighty results 
as are pointed out here. Shall we look at one or 
two examples near our own times of men and women 
who have lived in our generation ? 

Here is a poor cooper's family, in a little town in 
the midst of a vine-growing country. There are two 
children : a boy who is working hard to gain promo- 



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THE MiUliOB OF TRTJB WOMANHOOD. 



tion in the parish school, with the hope of being 
then sent to college, and becoming in good time a 
priest ; and a timid, sickly little girl, whom it re- 
quires perpetual nursing and ail the industry of a 
mother's love to save from the hand of death. The 
mother is a God-fearing woman, who makes of the 
practice of solid piety the first care and pleasure of 
both her children ; and the father— in the midst of 
the deluge of irreligious doctrines and revolutionary « 
tendencies which have crazed the labouring classes 
in town and country — holds firmly to the faith of his 
fathers. From the dawn till late into the night the 
townsfolk see him toiling away at his trade, varying 
his occupation with the culture of a small patch of 
vineyard at some distance in the country. In the 
terrible times during which their boy has grown to 
manhood, and is approaching the epoch of his ordi- 
nation, and while their sickly girl is budding into 
womanhood, both parents have had to fight a hard 
battle with the dire distress and famine which sweeps 
over their country like the breath of the divine 
wrath, and with the tempest of impiety, blood, and 
fire which sweeps before it throne and altar, king, 
queen, nobles, bishops, priests, and every man and 
woman on whom suspicion of loyalty or religiousness 
can light. 

The brother, concealed in his lowly paternal home, 
has undertaken to cultivate the mind and heart of 
his sister, and he teaches her all he knows, the lan- 
guages of Greece and Home, together with those of 
modern Europe. It seemed a folly to the parents, a 
folly to friends and neighbours, this high schooling 
of the poor cooper's sickly, shrinking daughter by a 



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203 



brother whose ambition was to cultivate both mind 
and heart, in man and woman, to the highest de- 
gree — and for God's service / And so, while parents 
at home murmured, and outside acquaintance sneered, 
the twin souls grew under the silent training of that 
Spirit, who only asks of man to turn to good purpose 
u the late and early rain" of the present day, and 
will Himself give the increase and the ripe fruit in 
due season. 

That brother's soul was not of the temper which 
could permit a priest to tarry idly or lie hidden be- 
neath the shelter of his father's workshop, while 
Paris streamed with the blood of priests and bishops, 
and souls in hourly peril of death sought in vain the 
saving aid a priestly hand could alone bestow. But 
to Paris he did not go alone. The timid, sickly 
maiden bore within her bosom a heroic soul, and 
she would share her brother's dangers, and, so far as 
she might, his glorious labours. 

When the great social earthquake was over, Euro- 
pean society was like a city overturned to its very 
foundations. Unbelief and the most hideous forms 
of anti-Christian error had invaded hearts and house- 
holds among every class, and the work of conversion 
had to be begun over again by the patient apostle- 
ship of education, more laborious a hundredfold 
and more difficult than the first great mission of the 
Twelve, when they went forth from the Upper 
Chamber to overthrow Eoman and Grecian ido- 
latry, with all the barbarous paganism of the tribes 
lying outside the empire of the Ccesars. And new 
worlds were also opening beyond the seas, where 
woman's devotion and heroism were called to vie 
with the most fervent zeal of priestly workmen. 

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204 THE MIRROR OP TRUE "WOMANHOOD. 

The brother had been but the instrument in God's 
hand, training and preparing that little sister, till the 
memorable day, November the 21st, 1800, when 
Providence made her the corner-stone of a society 
of apostolic women whose ranks now extend from 
Paris to the ends of the earth. 

She was in the very springtide of her maidenhood, 
when he who was then seated on the chair of St. 
Peter was first laid a babe on the knees of Countess 
Caterina Masta'i ; and on May the 25th, 1865, when 
that nobly-born child, after passing through the 
furnace, had borne for nineteen years the thorny 
crown of the Pontificate, that great-souled woman 
passed to the city of God on high, where thirteen 
hundred and sixty-eight of her associates in the 
world-wide apostleship were waiting for her, and 
nearly thrice that number were still on earth carry- 
ing on throughout both hemispheres the divine pur- 
pose to which she had devoted her life. 

We have not forgotten that bent and venerable 
form as we were privileged to behold it just before 
the angel of death had given the first warning of his 
approach : the face which seemed to shine with the 
radiance of the blessed, the words so full of 
the Spirit of God and which burned into the lis- 
tener's soul, the atmosphere of holiness which sur- 
rounded her, making one feel as if " a virtue went 
forth, " from the very hem of her garments. We 
could and would fain have knelt for a blessing from 
that great servant of God, the little sickly maid 
brought up in the cooper's poor cottage in Burgundy ! 

And how many others like herself, born in poverty, 
but trained to that divine generosity, which is the 



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205 



soul of Catholic spiritual life, were drawn to the 
saintly foundress by the charm of her humility, her 
gentleness, her greatness of soul, her consuming love 
of our Crucified Lord I 

"Who has done most for his glory and for the true 
welfare of the race, the lowly-born French girl, who 
was worthy to be the parent of so wide-spread and 
so thrifty a spiritual family, or the noble scion of 
the Mastai-Ferretti, raised so unwillingly to the 
papal throne, and governing the Church amid trials 
far more searching and destructive than the perse- 
cution of Decian or Domitian ? Their lives have run 
parallel for three-quarters of a century, and were 
both animated by that same heroic generosity which 
knew not how to refuse aught to God or to the 
neighbour's need. 

EDUCATION A CREATION. 

The beautiful languages of the nations onoe the most 
Catholic in Christendom, Spain, Italy, and Portugal, 
express the idea and work of education by that 
equivalent to " create." And a recent traveller in 
the last-named kingdom, who speaks most highly of 
the civilisation of the " unlettered " peasantry, de- 
serves to be quoted here. " To say of a Portuguese 
that he is mal creado — ill-brought-up, ill-bred — is 
still the greatest of reproaches. The exceptions to 
this universal good-breeding are to be seen among 
the lower-middle classes, with whom liberal ideas 
are happily (?) become common, but who appear to 
think, with liberals elsewhere, that discourtesy is 
equivalent to an assertion of equality. It has 



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206 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

frequently been noticed that, in Portugal, the best 
manners are to be found in the very highest 
and the very lowest classes. The middle classes, as 
a rule, however, sin rather from an excess than from 
a want of manners ; they are, like some vulgar peo- 
ple at home, far too anxious to show that they know 
how to behave. They are too ceremonious to be per- 
fectly courteous."* 

We are glad to insert this extract here, both to 
show our readers what the genuine notion of edu- 
cation is, and what effect it produces on men's 
manners and speech in their intercourse with each 
other. We shall revert to this perfect courtesy a 
little further on. At present our object is to show 
the effect of education on the soul itself. And here 
it is that we beg parents to consider seriously how 
divine a work is theirs. 

Education does literally complete in the child the 
work of the Creator. Only think of it. It is a 
wonderful thing to see how from the acorn planted 
in the ground a little pair of leaflets will bud forth, 
and then a tiny stem, which will grow taller and 
taller each day, each month, each year, putting forth 
branches, when in the open, to catch the rain, and 
the dew, and to balance itself against every wind that 
blows, waxing strong in sunshine and in storm till 
it becomes the ornament of the field or the hillside, 
and outliving for centuries the man who planted it 
and nursed it in its helplessness. 

See how the sculptor will take a block of marble 
from the quarry, and from this rough and shapeless 

* John Latouche, " Travels in Portugal," pp. 64, 65. 



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mass, with mallet and chisel, form a figure so 
beautiful, so life-like, that it seems to speak to you 
and almost about to move. And see, also, the great 
painter Lionardo, at work on a naked wall in a re- 
fectory of monks. He wished to represent the 
Master seated at table for the last time with the 
Twelve whom He had chosen to be the teachers and 
parents of a new spiritual world. Figure after 
figure is sketched and coloured along that table, and 
on each side of the Master, till the whole is com- 
pleted; and when the great workman unveils his 
masterpiece to the gaze of the long-expectant 
brotherhood, one rapturous cry of admiration bursts 
forth : " It is a creation !" The Divine One is there, 
his heart preparing to bestow on them, and on the 
world through them, his divinest gift, and He fore- 
sees how, within a few hours, one of those present 
will deliver Him up to his enemies, and how all will 
forsake Him in his need. You almost hear Him say 
mournfully : " Amen I say to you, that one of you is 
about to betray me." While the figures which start 
up around seem to reply by look or gesture : " Is it 
I, Lord?" 

All these wonders of art and industry are, in their 
importance, not to be compared to the divine work 
of education, its effects in the soul, and its conse- 
quences on the life of the individual and all depen- 
dent on his good or evil deeds. 

It is for the mother by her intelligence, patience, 
gentleness, and unwearied love to call forth in the 
soul of each of her children the mighty virtues lying 
there as in a rich soil only awaiting the skilful hand 
of the husbandman. 



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208 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

We are principally occupied with the culture of the 
heart. Create generosity in it : we have already seen 
how a beginning can be made in the babe ; now let 
us study its further progress in the boy and girl. 

GENEROSITY IN CONQUERING SELF. 

We know as well what are the baneful fruits of 
selfishness and self-indulgence. We have laid down 
unselfishness as the primary virtue not of motherhood 
only but of true womanhood. Should any one of 
the mothers who may be interested in these lessons 
find, on examining her conscience, that she is still 
too much in love with self, then let her learn to 
overcome herself while teaching her child this indis- 
pensable virtue of self-denial. There is not a 
moment to be lost. Bad habits take root with fear- 
ful rapidity even in the richest natures. They grow 
and ripen, and bear their fruit, like southern vines 
and weeds, almost in a single day and night. Crush 
them, pluck them out pitilessly from their very first 
appearance, and do not weary of the labour of root- 
ing them out again and again; for your child's 
salvation depends on your sleepless watchfulness and 
perseverance. 

The most successful method, however, consists in 
accustoming your child to continual acts of the 
virtues opposed to selfishness. 

Teach them not to yield easily to the natural 
sympathies and preferences which arise among 
brothers and sisters, and which often prove so fruitful 
a source of domestic discord, strife, and misery. It 
is, even in the child, selfishness which inclines it to 



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love all who are of its own disposition, who please 
it and pet it. Make the child be kind to every 
one of its brothers and sisters without distinction. 
But should it so happen that it have a dislike to 
any one of them in particular, accustom it to 
show this one some special mark of affection and 
kindness. 

No little strength is imparted to the childish 
character by thus early accustoming it to be generous 
in overcoming its likings and dislikes where these 
are unfounded, or of a nature to breed mischief when 
allowed to grow. Besides, the exercise of this samt, 
generosity of will is of scarcely less importance to- 
wards the child's outside playmates and acquaintances. 
Many a fatal friendship has sprung up at the age of 
ten or twelve. This very morning's papers record 
the sudden death from heart disease of a poor hard- 
working and virtuous mother, whose son, perhaps 
an only son, had contracted, in spite of repeated 
warnings and chastisement, an intimacy with a boy 
of his own age. The latter exercised a sort of fascina- 
tion over all those of his years in the crowded quarter 
where they lived, organised a band of juvenile liber- 
tines, thieves, and burglars ; and gave the police a 
world of trouble. 

A burglary was committed and traced to the two 
lads ; and the tempter and his victim were seized by 
a detective just as they were about to enter the 
latter' s home. The poor anxious mother had been 
watching all the livelong night near her window for 
her absent boy — he is only a boy — judging that he 
was in some trouble or danger. She had fallen into a 
slumber towards morning, when the noise at the door 
15 



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210 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



startled her ; and, on opening her window, she saw 
them handcuffing her child. There was a faint 
scream, which awakened the husband, and then a 
low moan, while she pressed her hands on her 
heart. 14 Oh ! the pain I have here Y 9 And she was 
dead. 

Had she been neglectful of her duty towards that 
child? Alas ! but few, very few among mothers of 
that class, living in such awful neighbourhoods, are 
careful to do what we are here endeavouring to in- 
culcate—to check the very first beginnings of intimacy 
and companionship with all who are not thoroughly 
good. 

TEACH THEM GENEROSITY IN/ THE EXERCISE OF THE 
HOME CHARITIES. 

Home is, or always should be, the school where the 
child should learn this practical generosity. There are 
aged persons in the home; and what household is com- 
plete or completely blessed without venerable age ! 
There is nothing so beautiful among men as age : its 
very wrinkles and infirmities are eloquent of the battle 
of life well fought and the glorious victory won. The 
fruit tree in spring, when it is covered with the tender 
green of its leaves and the lovely tints of its 
blossoms, is a charming object to the sense ; but this 
bloom only lasts a few days, the blossoms drop with 
the first blast or the first rain, and then all nature's 
labour through the remaining spring, summer, and 
autumn is to increase and ripen the fruit. When 
they hang in all their mellow richness from the 
branches, at the end of the fine season, do not com- 



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TEACH THEM GENEROSITY, ETC. 



211 



plain that the flowers are no longer there, that the 
few leaves left are discoloured or shrivelled, and ready 
to fall to the ground. Leaves and flowers, dew and 
rain and sunshine, the rich moisture of the earth and 
the blessed warmth of the air, all worked together 
to bring forth fruit on that tree. Is the fruit there ? 
Are the branches bending beneath their load? 
Then there is not in garden, field, or forest, a more 
precious or beautiful object than that tree with its 
golden load of fruit ! 

Even so with a long life all filled with brave 
struggles against poverty and loss and treachery and 
discouragement, with victories over one's own weak- 
nesses and virtues ripened in the soul to the full ma- 
turity of Christian holiness — what is more glorious, 
more lovely, more worthy of affection and reverence, 
than these long lives, with their merits and pregnant 
lessons, just as the sun of this world is setting for 
them and the first brightness of the Eternal Day 
is on their close ? 

We could kiss the maimed hands and feet of the 
soldier who has given his limbs and exposed his life 
for the defence of our liberty and our honour! 
Even though the battle in which he received his 
wounds lasted but a single hour, his glorious scars 
deserve perpetual remembrance and gratitude. But 
when the hands of a dear mother, after serving us so 
long, after having given us so lavishly and lovingly 
of the fruits of her late and early toil, and having 
been lifted, morning and night, for our dear need to 
Him from whom all good descendeth, when these 
hands that have nursed our helpless infancy, sup- 
ported and directed us through childhood, are now 



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THE MTRROB OF TET7E 'WOMANHOOD. 



infirm with exoess of labour, and trembling with tte 
chill of age, shall we ever touch them without kiss- 
ing them with infinite reverence ? For the hands of 
a mother are the visible image near to us on earth of 
that Almighty hand, all wisdom and tenderness, 
which never ceases to toil for us throughout the un- 
wearying years. 

Or, when the wearied feet of a father linger, be- 
numbed and leaden, near the hearthstone, shall we 
not call to mind, with swelling hearts, the long and 
rugged road over which they have travelled, burdened 
with the load of our manifold wants, aching and 
bleeding many times, and yet unable to pause for 
rest ; for the love of us urged them onward through 
sun and storm, through ice and snow, till nature sank 
exhausted ? 0 blessed feet, how well might every 
true-hearted child not only venerate the sores which 
time and long travel have left behind, but kiss your 
prints along the rugged paths through which you 
fared unfalteringly for our dear sakes ! 

And other aged are often in the home, venerable 
relatives who cast their lot with the family, or on 
whose own hearthstone there is nothing left bat the 
cold ashes of a former warm and generous hospitality; 
or the stranger, given a place by the hearth in 
Christ's name, and to be reverenced as his own 
person ! 

0 home-charities of the Christian family, what 
deep and heavenly love you lay open to the soul, 
and what visions of the dwelling of the Common 
Father above the skies, where love eternal decks 
out its most royal mansions for those who are poorest 
and lowliest here below 1 



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REVERENCE AND WORSHIP THE SICK. 213 

With all the voices of our soul we beseech you, 0 
mothers, to inculcate reverence for the aged, whom 
God has given you to love and venerate in his own 
stead. Beautiful, most beautiful, is this tender and 
worshipful regard which our holy faith bids us pay 
to gray hairs. It was a living part of the religion of 
our fathers, it was the honour of every Catholic fire- 
side : oh ! let us cherish it here as the sure pledge 
of God's blessing on our homes, and the fulfilment 
of the promise of " long life in the land " to all who 
honour father, and mother, and old age to the end ! 
Teach your boys and girls also to 

REVERENCE AND WORSHIP THE SICK AND INFIRM IN 
YOUR HOME. 

To the lessons contained in the seventh chapter of 
this book, it may suffice to add here, that of all the 
blessings God may send to the home of such as love 
Him truly, none is more precious than the presence 
of the sick. 

Children and young people (at least where these 
have not been already perverted by self-indulgence) 
are naturally inclined towards the needy and suffer- 
ing. The pale and emaciated features of the sick 
plead eloquently with young and generous hearts, 
and their moans find a ready echo in souls from 
which sin has not banished the spirit of charity. It 
is for mothers to foster and train aright in the bosoms 
of their boys and girls this touching sympathy 
towards every kind of infirmity and disease. There 
is One in the soul of your child who will not fail to 
help you powerfully. Only recall, when you are 
teaching your dear ones, how the Master loved the 



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214 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



sick, and how He would have it that if they only 
touched the hem of his garment with a lively faith 
they should instantly be healed. 

Was it not his own mission of healing mercy to 
our souls that He described so divinely in the parable 
of the Good Samaritan ? Is not the office of that 
love which bore us in its heart from all eternity, and 
which ever stoops to the need and misery of each, 
as if each were alone in existence, painted by the 
divine hand in that alien in blood and religion who 
forgot the whole world to care for the wounded man 
found by the roadside, while priest and Levite, the 
fellow-countrymen and fellow-worshippers of the 
poor forlorn one, went to the other side of the road, 
lest it should be thought they saw his blood or heard 
his groans? 

Make every child of yours know and feel that he 
or she is the poor lost one, cast, all wounded and 
dying, by the roadside, and so near the eternal 
death, and that the friend in need was He who came 
from the throne of heaven to heal, to restore, to lift 
up to the height whence He had Himself descended. 
Make them understand that, on leaving the earth 
again, He wishes and bids everyone of us to do for the 
sick in body, in heart, or in soul, what He did for us. 

LET CHILDREN AND YOUNG PEOPLE GENEROUSLY OVER- 
LOOK INFIRMITIES OF TEMPER IN THE AGED AND 
SICK. 

This will be the crown of your home-charities; 
for, if there are aged and sick persons of so sweet a 
disposition, and such conversational charm, that the 
pleasure felt in one's intercourse with them more 




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GENEROSITY IN FORGETTING ONE* 8 PAIN. 215 

than repays any service rendered, any effort at gene- 
rosity made in attending to their wants or their 
gratification, there are others whose manners disgust 
or whose temper sorely tries all who approach them. 

This, however, is an extreme case. But be that as 
it may, it is the mother's duty, where there are such 
persons in the family, to prepare the children to 
expect that old persons should have certain peculi- 
arities which are to be borne with. The reverence 
with which she will have taught them to regard age 
in all persons, will prevent her dear pupils from 
turning into ridicule whatever might strike them as 
ludicrous. Nay, the true politeness which comes 
from the culture of the heart, and is the offspring of 
piety, will teach them to submit graoefully and 
lovingly to the whims and oddities of old people, as 
well as to the irritability of the sick. 

This generous self-restraint and devotion to the 
need and comfort of others is an admirable discipline 
for the young, as well as a rioh souroe of merit 
before the Divine Majesty, whom the true children of 
God profess to serve, and believe they serve, in 
ministering to the infirm and the aged. 

GENEROSITY IN FORGETTING ONE'S PAIN, TO PLEASE 
OTHERS. 

This last and most important form of the home- 
charities can be practised by children every day of 
their lives. A mother well accustomed, in her un- 
varying attention to the happiness of all around her, 
to forget the pain that is torturing head and limbs, 
the carking oare which is gnawing at her heart, and 



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216 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

the grief which, is seldom absent from the life of the 
purest ami the best, will easily succeed in making 
her daughters remember that they too must forget 
their little aches and griefs to make all pleasant for 
their brothers and sisters, or to show perfect hospi- 
tality to visitors. Nor will they have any difficulty 
in making their sons, every day and hour of their 
lives, give up out -door pleasures or pursuits in order 
to contribute their share to home enjoyments, or to 
its generous hospitalities. 

One instance of such self-denial, in a child of 
twelve summers, may conclude, not inaptly, this 
fundamental doctrine on generosity. She, as well as 
her older sisters, had been taught by the example of 
both her parents to devote herself, in spite of head- 
aches, or other such slight ailments, to make the 
evenings in the family circle delightful, or to give up 
her whole time to the entertainment of guests. In 
the absence of the mother, this became the all-im- 
portant duty of her daughters ; and they, to gratify 
their worshipped mother, vied with each other in 
leaving no one of the home-charities unattended to 
while she was away. 

It so happened that during one of these enforced 
absences the fatal disease which carried off our little 
maiden so suddenly, seized her at the very time 
when two girls of her own age, and dear friends of 
the family, were visiting her. The child was in an 
agony of pain all dav, trying the while to wear her 
sweet smile, to play and sing with her friends ; and, 
lest she should seem inhospitable, she carefully con- 
cealed her torture from her sisters, going for a few 
moments to the kitchen, where no one could observe 



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GENEROSITY IN FORGETTING ONE'S PAIN. 217 



her, and giving way. to her tears. She made the cook 
promise that no one should know she was suffering. 

And thus the day passed, and the long evening 
came. But then the pain in her limbs became so 
dreadful, that every now and then she would cast 
herself on the sofa to find a moment's relief. She 
took her share in all the amusements of the drawing- 
room ; it was only remarked that her eyes shone with 
a preternatural brightness, and that her colour went 
and came very rapidly. She had, however, no 
sooner bidden her two little friends good-night, than 
she became insensible. 

They laid the unconscious child on the sofa, applied, 
in vain, restoratives, and then bore her to her room. 
But she was to rise no more from her bed. During 
an entire week she raved in the grasp of the malig- 
nant and mysterious disease which had seized upon 
her, unable to recognise even her father, but calling 
piteously and oontinually for her absent mother. 
She, with her eldest daughter, was hundreds of miles 
away by the sick-bed of her own parent. The latter, 
when the telegraph summoned her visitors away, 
would not even hear of her grand-daughter's remain- 
ing with her, and chose to suffer alone in her 
widowed home, bidding her ohildren imperatively 
not to delay one moment. 

They did not arrive a moment too soon. It was 
midnight when they entered the sick-chamber ; the 
terrible spasms of the preceding days had now given 
place to a deep lethargy, the evident forerunner of 
death. The poor mother, who expected every minute 
to be the last, sat tearful but resigned to the 
coming of the dread angel, praying with her whole 



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218 



THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



soul that her child might recover consciousness, were 
it only to know that her mother was by her side. 
Suddenly, at the first break of dawn, the little sufferer 
opened her eyes, a preternatural light overspread her 
features, and, stretching forth her arms, "Oh, 
mamma 1 " she said, " I am so glad you have come 
home again ! " Then, raising herself, she clasped 
her weeping parent round the neck, and drew her 
down on the pillow. " Dear mamma," she continued, 
"I have been very ill since you went away." Her 
parent tried to soothe her ; but, as the patient per- 
ceived her youngest sister standing near, "Oh! 

L she said, "you can now have my blue 

ribbon " (a favourite ornament). And, with one look 
of inexpressible tenderness at her mother, and draw- 
ing what seemed a deep sigh of relief, she closed her 
eyes, and gave her soul to the embrace of the divine 
messenger. 

She had been preparing, with angelic fervour, for 
her first communion, and would have made it ere the 
end of the month. On the Sunday before her illness 
she had, as usual, gone to early Mass in her parish 
church. She begged her brother and youngest sister, 
when the service was ended, to go home without her, 
while she remained to pray a little longer. To their 
remonstrances she replied that she wanted to ask for 
the grace of a happy death. " Tou know, dear/' 
she pleaded, "that one may die suddenly." The 
malignant pustule which soon manifested itself gave 
no sign of its presence when the words were uttered. 

Scarcely four hours had elapsed after that most 
innocent soul had been borne away, when the body 
was so blackened that it had to be enclosed in a 



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GENEROSITY IN OUT-DOOR CHARITIES. 219 



casket. Yet, from the very moment of her passing 
away, so sweet and strange an odour filled the room, 
that the whole household, as well as strangers, 
marvelled at it, so unlike was the fragrance to any 
perfume of earth; and when, later, the family 
changed their residence, two of the deceased child's 
sisters visited her room to ascertain whether the odour 
still clung to it. It was there still, like an atmos- 
phere of purity and virginal holiness ! 

GENEROSITY IN PRACTISING THE OUT-DOOR CHARITIES. 

As every mother, whether her home be that of 
the labouring man, or that of the rich man, or the 
noble, has a deep interest in the poor round about, 
and a divine obligation to fulfil towards them in pro- 
portion to her means, so is it her duty to train her 
children to aid her in ministering to them. We re- 
member a baker's wife, with eight children, girls 
nearly all of them, and whose husband was not 
troubled with much money in bank, who never 
failed during the most inclement winter's weather to 
go out with one of her children to bring bread to a 
number of poor families in pressing need of relief. 
Winter and summer, long before the break of day, 
she and her companion, with their full basket, would 
sally forth, making their visits rapidly, and then 
stopping at the nearest church to hear Mass, before 
they broke their fast. To be mother's companion in 
this early excursion was a privilege eagerly con- 
tended for by all her children, and often granted as 
a reward for success at school or steady amendment 
at home. And the Uaker himself, when his oldest 
boy could superintend the business during the early 



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220 THB MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

morning, would joyously take the basket and trudge 
along beside his wife, through rain and sleet and 
snow! He "wanted," he said, "to have a kind 
word and a blessing from the sick as well as his 
wife and when, almost paralysed by rheumatism, 
he still persisted in taking his turn, he would reply 
to the pleading of his sons and daughters : " Best I 
and sleep a little longer ! — no, no ! I shall have a 
long sleep in the grave ; and heaven will be a good 
place to rest in." He was called to it all too early, 
the royal-souled man. . . . But he left behind 
him children who made it their happiness and glory 
to imitate him, and to be thereby worthy of their 
mother, the guide of both father and children in 
every good work and every home-virtue. 

A PATRIARCHAL FAMILY. 

Let us conclude our instruction on this matter by 
mentioning a family whose name is still held in 
benediction throughout the north of France — the 
family of M. Dubois of Valenciennes. This man, 
one of the angels of God to the poor and the perse- 
cuted during the great French Eevolution, had been 
twice married ; but, as we were assured by one of 
them, the children of the second wife grew to man- 
hood and womanhood before they knew that she 
who was their mother was not the mother of their 
elder brothers and sisters. Twenty children had 
sprung from these two marriages 1 and, at the epoch 
of the father's death, nearly one hundred of his 
descendants knelt around his bed to receive his 
blessing. 

Though he was then the possessor of a large for- 



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A PATRIARCHAL FAMILY. 



221 



tone, far more than he possessed had been distri- 
buted to the poor or bestowed in good works, during 
his lifetime, by himself, and his sons and daughters 
under his direction. Indeed he was known and re- 
vered far and wide as the father of the poor. 

After his funeral, and the reading of the will, his 
sons and grandsons would not separate till they had 
agreed to take on themselves, each some one of the 
favourite good works and charities of their parent. 
The eldest son allowed all his juniors to make their 
choice; "and," said our informant, "they seemed 
to have all of them quite enough in what was allowed 
to them ; while to the eldest fell the ' discipline ' or 
scourge, and the hair shirt used by the saintly dead 
to keep his own body in subjection. But to every 
one of that noble race had descended unimpaired the 
faith and generosity of their heroic ancestors." 

Such are the results of Catholic piety where the 
Spirit of God is allowed to reign both in homes and 
in hearts ; such the generously-tempered souls, in 
the palace as well as in the cottage, which true 
Christian mothers form when they do their work 
well. But what shall we think of such women as 
are painted in the following passages : 

" When we observe women for whom silk is too 
rough, whom a rose-leaf wounds, who swoon at the 
least sound, who cannot pronounce their words whole, 
who, forgetting their own affairs, attend to those of 
others, whose lives pass in visiting their pretended 
friends, who are found at all parties, who are pleased 
in worldly societies, in splendid entertainments, and 
cannot live retired in their houses, who must know 
all the stories of the town, whose curiosity impels 



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222 THE 1OBB0B OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



them to go everywhere, who can invent false reports, 
and can rekindle old hatreds — when we consider 
what these persons ought to be, and what they 
are, ... it is difficult not to feel an indignation 
which is itself admonitory and instructive ; for then 
we shall call to mind that the Oatholio religion, 
which denounced suoh manners as infamous, fur- 
nishes the best security against their recurrence." * 

MAKE NOT THE BREAD OF HOSPITALITY BITTER. 

And so, with one other word of exhortation, we 
close this chapter. Among the many outside of one's 
home to whom charity in its most blessed form will 
prove a most welcome visitor, there will be found 
persons too proud to make their wants known, and 
too sensitive about accepting any aid, even when at 
their utmost need. And such persons are as numer- 
ous among the poorer classes as among the rich and 
the well-born. 

Find out these shrinking ones. Approach them 
with more respect than you would show to king or 
queen, or pope or president. Your heart will teach 
you how to make the much-needed relief acceptable. 
For the heart has infinite delicacy. And when you 
have discovered these hidden sufferers from want, 
not only must you be careful not to pry into their 
lives or to show a curiosity which would be resented 
because it wounds cruelly, but you must conceal 
names and facts from everybody as sacredly as you 
would guard the secrets of your own soul. 

There are families unwearied in their efforts to 

• Luis de Leon, quoted in Compitum, B. I., o. iv., p. 107. 



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MAKE KOT THE BREAD OF HOSPITALITY BITTER. 223 

find out such oases of distress and meritorious char- 
ity as we here point out, and who, when the sufferers 
belong to their own class, are most ingenious in 
making their own homes acceptable and delightful 
to these homeless ones. Oh ! it is the luxury of do- 
ing good rewarded by an interior sweetness beyond 
the power of expression. 

But let us remember, when such sufferers are ad- 
mitted to our hospitality, that no act or effort should 
be neglected to make the bread we break to them 
sweet, and the wine of our generosity not bitter, by 
cold looks or anything that might savour of weari- 
ness or neglect. 



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224 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



CHAPTER XIII. 

SPECIAL TRAINING FOR GIRLS AND FOR BOYS. 

Thus far the instruction given applied almost equally 
to children of both sexes. What is said in this 
chapter addresses itself first to girls and then to 
boys, purposing to aid the mother in perfecting the 
education of her daughters and sons, according to 
the requirements of their future avocations. 

I. 

WHAT IS SPECIAL IN THE HOME EDUCATION OF GIRLS. 

There are not a few persons, of great experience 
in directing souls, who have been so dispirited at 
seeing the result of the public education given to 
boys, that they would have parents and all persons 
interested in teaching bestow their chief care on the 
training of girls. Whatever may be the little or the 
much of truth in the theories, arguments, and facts 
set forth by these persons and their opponents, it is 
none the less indisputable that the ill training given 
to girls, whether at home or in our public schools, 
has made them the abettors and counsellors of the 
dishonesty, the corruption, the love of extravagance 
and dissipation which are producing among men of 
every class in the community the frightful crop of 



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THE HOME EDUCATION OF GIRLS. 225 

crime which is the most alarming symptom of the 
latter half of this nineteenth century. The forgeries, 
the wide thirst for ruinous speculation, the gambling 
on the stock-exchange, the betrayal of sacred trust 
in offices high and low, the open and shameless or- 
ganisations of public men in almost every depart- 
ment of general or local government aiming at brib- 
ing in order to rob the public, and robbing in order 
to supply the inconceivable extravagance of theix 
wives and daughters : all this is due either to the 
early lack of strong moral home-culture, to the ne- 
glect of woman's holy influence over boyhood, or to 
the baneful influence of women ill-trained or taught 
to look upon pleasure and enjoyment as the prime 
end of life. 

Assuredly if mothers are only such as we have 
been describing them, if their children and their 
young people are brought up in the convictions, the 
principles, and the conscientious practice of the vir- 
tues we have been detailing, our young girls will 
be anything but vain, extravagant, heartlessly fond 
of admiration and enjoyment, while their brothers 
must be everything rather than the wretched crowd 
of untrustworthy spendthrifts, forgers, thieves, 
gamblers, and drunkards whose doings are daily 
chronicled in the press. 

But apart from these degrading and discouraging 
manifestations of the result of our wide-spread edu- 
cational systems, there remains to the Church of God, 
and to the priest who does her work faithfully, the 
mighty influence of Christian motherhood training 
an army of true women to withstand and cry down 
untrustfulness, dishonesty, and corruption, and an 

16 



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226 THIS MIRROR OF TEX7E "WOMANHOOD. 



auxiliary army of true men, to be in their lives the 
embodiment of truth, honour, and incorruptible in- 
tegrity. 

"We do not know whether this little book may ever 
reach the firesides of Episcopalians, Presbyterians, or 
Methodists, but we fervently hope, with his blessing 
who knows how to use the lowliest instrumentalities 
for the highest purposes, that it may be of some 
utility in the homes of our Catholic millions, and 
thereby leaven their hearts and minds with that lofti- 
ness of aim and purity in performance without which 
neither public liberty nor national greatness is 
possible. 

So then, 0 mothers, we are now in the very heart 
of our subject ; and no words we can use are at all 
able to express the intense desire we have, to fix 
your whole attention on what we are about to say. 

THE GIRLHOOD AND BOYHOOD OP TO-DAY THE TWIN- 
ROOTS OF THE SOCIETY OF THE FUTURE. 

The spirit and practice of simplicity in dress, in 
food, and in furniture, the practical and continual self- 
denial, which we have laid down as the very soul of 
womanly virtue (as they are in very deed the soul 
of Christian life), must be made the groundwork 
of the education you give your girls. It will be for 
them, as it must have been for yourselves, health of 
body as well as health of soul ; it will be for the 
men and women of whom God destines them to be 
the mothers, the principle of strength of limb and 
energy of will, of clearness of intellect and purity of 
life ; and these are the men and women for which 
America and the whole of Christendom are yearning 



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SIMPLICITY AND SELF-DENIAL. 227 



and praying, and without whom, within a century, 
our civilisation will be worse than heathenism. 

SIMPLICITY AND SELF-DENIAL. 

There never yet existed a perfect man, one pos- 
sessed of that moral excellence in which there is no 
flaw, who was not distinguished by simplicity of 
character and a life of self-denial. Much more is 
this true of woman. And why ? Because the true 
woman, the perfect woman, values before and above 
everything that virtue, that strength of mind which 
seeks to make the soul like unto God, by the posses- 
sion of perfect knowledge and perfect holiness, and 
by considering external advantages — beauty, wealth, 
dress, ornament, and the homage of others — as only 
an accessory to greatness of the soul, and as utterly 
valueless when that greatness is not there. These 
things do not make the woman or the man, no more 
than the magnificent robes of a feeble, decrepit old 
king, when a pageant or state-reception is over, can 
help to conceal the palsied limbs, the shrunken frame, 
the weakened mind, or to pacify the conscience 
mindful of a long life of debauchery and tyranny. 

You have often seen women — poor women, too — 
so beautiful that no splendour of dress could have 
added to the charm of their beauty : simplicity alone 
befits those things which God has made most beauti- 
ful and most perfect. Ornament is there superfluous, 
or the Creator would have added it; and ornament 
is only called in to aid in concealing the poverty of 
nature or of art. 

You have also seen women — nay, you know suoh 
in every neighbourhood — to whom, naturally un- 



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228 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



comely, or even ugly, goodness, innocence, holiness 
lend a charm so heavenly that they are more than 
beautiful. The light of the beautiful soul seems, in 
such persons, to pierce the rude bodily covering, and 
overspread the features, transforming them, making 
them shine with a splendour which is not of earth. 

Oh ! aim, then, at possessing, first of all, this un- 
earthly glory, which, though " all within," sheds a 
lustre on the bodily frame that ravishes the beholder. 
We remember in one of the dear old Catholic homes 
of Maryland to have seen an aged slave- woman, who 
had a merited reputation of exalted piety, so trans- 
formed while expressing her anxiety about the 
spiritual welfare of her husband and son living in 
Louisiana, that her face shone like that of an angel. 
Indeed it was impossible to see this gentle creature 
without being impressed with a feeling akin to vene- 
ration, so visibly did the light of holiness irradiate 
the dark and wrinkled countenance ! So was it with 
the venerable Mother Barat, the foundress of the 
Ladies of the Sacred Heart ; and so with many and 
many a soul to whom we have given the Bread 
of Life at the Communion table : rays from behind 
the veil seemed to illumine their countenances with 
a glory that sent a thrill to the soul of the beholder. 

SIMPLICITY IN DRESS. 

Beauty, the highest beauty, does not consist so 
much in outline and form as in expression; and 
what ineffable beauty does not the expression of 
purity and holiness give to the homeliest counte- 
nance and the frailest figure ! Certain old earthen- 
ware vases were covered with designs so exquisite, 



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SIMPLICITY IN DRESS. 



229 



and in colours so cunningly disguised to en ordinary 
observer, that, in his estimation, they possessed 
neither beauty nor value. But when, at night, a 
light was placed within them, the whole artifice of 
the maker was plain, and they were pronounced 
most beautiful and of inestimable price by the be- 
holder. 

Be ambitious to place that light — the light of that 
supernatural love you know of — within your daugh- 
ter's soul ; and fear not but when lighted up with it 
face and figure will charm ail who look upon them. 
This first labour of yours will only be the beginning 
of the formation of 

"A perfect woman, nobly planned 
To warn, to comfort, and command — 
And yet a spirit still and bright, 
With something of an angel light !" 

If you continue to add to this sweet simplicity 
and purity of soul that other sister and guardian 
virtue, self-denial, as you have been taught in the 
preceding chapters, rest assured that, at fifteen and 
sixteen, your child will add to that angelic expres- 
sion of countenance 

** The reason firm, the temperate will, 
Endurance, foresight, strength, and skill, " 

everything, in one word, which can make her "a 
phantom of delight" to the beholder. 

What man, no matter how high-born, if his heart 
has not been corrupted by vicious indulgence, would 
not prefer such " a vision of purity," though wear- 
ing the simplest attire, to a gaudy worldling dressed 
out in robes and jewels worth a fortune, and from 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



whose eyes- flashes only the fire of earthly pas- 
sions ? 

It is not the child rich in the priceless treasure of 
the virtues you thus inculcate who is likely to be un- 
sought for or unloved, or who, when she has been 
found by the man of God's own choice, will fail to 
make his home a paradise, and his whole life one 
long blissful bridal day. 

If you are a wealthy mother, you will understand 
that by insisting on this early love and practice of 
simplicity, we do not condemn the richness of attire 
suitable to one's condition, or the occasional wearing 
of suitable ornaments. 

The habit of simplicity in girlhood and maiden- 
hood will be certain to lead to appropriateness and 
good taste in everything and throughout life. It is 
not the well-born or the well-educated, the simple- 
minded and pure-hearted maidens of our true 
Catholic homes, who are to be seen before marriage 
bedizened, like the queens of a country theatre, with 
flashy gold ornaments, added to the horror of the 
loudest colours; it is not the married women who 
have come from such homes, after having been 
trained by true Christian mothers, who will be seen 
going through the markets with trains fit only for a 
drawing-room, and their fingers all aflame with dia- 
monds and emeralds, or astonishing the motley 
crowd, packed into a street-car, with their diamond 
ear-rings, their diamond brooches, and their diamond 
necklaces, all which flaming ornaments in such 
places advertise the wearers as " shoddy," as plainly 
as if they bore the word placarded on breast and 
shoulders. 



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SUITABILITY IN DBEB9 IS NOT EXTBAYAQANOS. 

This beautiful simplicity in dress and ornament 
still remains as a relic of ancient Catholio customs 
even in the countries that have cast off their alle- 
giance to the Roman See. All through maidenhood 
girls of the highest rank dress with extreme simpli- 
city, which its very suitableness and good taste com- 
pel one to consider as elegant ; unmarried young 
ladies, though never so nobly born, do not wear 
jewels, even on solemn occasions. 

This same habit of simplicity and sense of appro- 
priateness have another remarkable effect in old 
Catholic lands. In Spain and Portugal, women of 
every rank, young and old, married and unmarried, 
never attend church save dressed in black and deeply 
veiled. The highest and wealthiest have a little 
mat brought with them to the church, on which they 
sit or kneel during the service. There are no pews, 
and no carpets, to preserve the worshippers from 
contact with the cold marble or tiles of the floor. 

The same custom prevailed all over Christendom 
before the Reformation : one not unlike it rules in many 
parts of Italy and France, in spite of the sad changes 
brought about by revolutionary impiety. At any rate, 
the practice points to the beautiful discipline of the 
Church in times when she was powerful enough 
to enforce her own regulations; and the austere 
simplicity and sentiment of equality which underlie 
the custom, embody her doctrine and feeling. 

They are in marked contrast with the luxurious- 
ness with which so many of our fashionable churches 
are fitted up, and with the extravaganoe of the 



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232 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

women who frequent them at late service, the 
wealthy dressing as if the house of God were the 
temple of Vanity, and the poor either excluded by 
their very poverty or shamed into staying away lest 
their poor attire should provoke the sneers of the 
rich. With Protestant denominations, among whom 
this scandal is so general, where the church edifice 
belongs to the society of worshippers, and where a 
wealthy few own and furnish it and hire the preacher, 
we have nothing to do. We only pray that the day 
maybe far distant, indeed, when the Divine Sacrifice 
of the New Law, at which all Catholics are bound 
to be present, shall fail to have around its fcltars 
the crowd of the poor and the lowly, so dear to the 
heart of the Great Victim ! 

But the very mention of this Victim and this 
blessed daily sacrifice, with all the sublime and com- 
forting realities which cluster around it, should be 
enough to recall to the mind of every believing man 
and woman how monstrous it seems to make of the 
solemn celebration of the death of Him who died 
hanging naked, humiliated, and soul-stricken on the 
bitter tree, an occasion of displaying vanity in dress 
and levity in deportment. 

Oh ! how true to the divine reality of the sacrifice 
is the beautiful Spanish custom, which bade women 
come to Mass attired as if they were to mourn with 
the Mother of Sorrows, and men to stand upright in 
their strength, as if they emulated the beloved disciple 
who stood with Mary beneath the cross during the 
three long hours of his terrible agony! And shall 
we Catholics, in this nineteenth century, allow the 
glorious piety of our fathers to die out in our souls, 



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WHAT YOUR DAUGHTERS ARB TO READ. 233 



and our churches to be other than the temples of the 
Lamb, where we should meet half in joy and half in 
sorrow beneath the shadow of the cross and its Vic- 
tim, to taste in our heart of hearts the bitter-sweet 
of the great oommemoration ? 

WHAT YOUR DAUGHTERS ARB TO READ. 

Akin to the fatal passion for dress is the still more 
fatal and no less general passion for light reading. 
We have already warned you against the danger of 
reading every book and newspaper they may chance 
upon. What then shall they read ? It would scarcely 
be possible, even if it were wise, to give a list of 
books and publications adapted to family reading, 
and specially suited to the minds of children and 
young people. Vitally important as early religious 
instruction is, and great as is the help derived from 
reading books treating on religion and the men and 
matters connected with its history before and after 
Christ, it is hard, and it might seem invidious, to 
point out those which we deem the very best for the 
purpose now in view. 

English-speaking Catholics labour under no slight 
disadvantage in that the standard works of English 
literature are for the most part either not Catholic or 
bitterly anti- Catholic. Our language had been 
formed, just as the genius of the nation had been 
trained, by the Catholic education of the eight cen- 
turies preceding Elizabeth. Just as the diction of 
Chaucer and Bobert Grossetete had ripened into the 
style of Spenser, Shakespeare, and Sir Thomas More, 
the arch-enemy broke up the unity of Christendom, 
and separated England from the Holy See. The 



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234 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

classic tongue which Catholic England had been 
perfecting and polishing then became the mighty 
weapon of triumphant heresy and the vehicle of a 
spirit hostile to the Church of St. Bede and Alfred 
the Great. It is only within the lifetime of the gene- 
ration not yet passed away that the Catholic wor- 
ship was free under the British crown, or that the 
English tongue was taught to utter Catholic truth or 
convey to men's minds the history, the doctrines, 
and the ascetic theology of the Great Mother. 

Still we have in the works issued within three- 
quarters of a century, on both sides of the Atlantic, a 
great wealth of Catholio literature. We lack, indeed, 
many, very many — not to say most — of the beauti- 
fully illustrated and otherwise attractive books des- 
tined especially for childhood and youth, and in 
which Protestant literature is so rich. Still we have 
enough, and more than enough, to place in the 
homes of the wealthy, as well as in the least favoured 
homes. For, during childhood and early youth, edu- 
cated and zealous mothers, truly Christian teachers, 
and well-conducted Sunday-schools, will know how 
to provide ample food, wholesome and nourishing, 
for the young and studious mind. 

It is most important that girls should be even 
better grounded than boys of their age in the clear 
and full knowledge of Christian doctrine, the Bible 
history,* the history of the Church, the lives of the 
most glorious saints in every age, and in that beau- 
tiful portion of Christian history whioh relates the 
rise and progress of Church architecture, with the 

* Reeves', ed. by Dr. Walah. 



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235 



dependent arts of painting and sculpture. Such 
eloquent works as those of Montalembert — the " Life 
of St. Elizabeth of Hungary," and "The Monks of 
the West" — will open up for the generous mind of 
youth prospects so enchanting and a world of hero- 
ism so beautiful and elevating, that no boy or girl 
who has begun them can help reading to the end 
and returning to the lecture again and again, like 
the thirsty traveller to the delicious spring ; and 
those who like such works will be impatient to read 
more — the works of Rio on Christian art and poetry 
those of Ozanam, of Dom Gu6ranger, and many of 
Dr. Newman's most beautiful volumes. 

GIRLS TO BE TAUGHT IN GOOD TIME THE WEAKNESS 
OF HERESY AND UNBELIEF. 

Your object in training, instructing, educating 
your girls is to rear women thoroughly enlightened 
in all that can make them love the faith of their 
baptism and enable them to explain and defend 
it; to rear mothers able to be the first and most 
successful teachers of their children in all that 
pertains to faith and the true life— the life of the 
soul. When girls have reaohed their thirteenth 
year, they must be given the history of the heresies 
and schisms which still live and set themselves up 
against the authority of Christ's infallible Church. 

They must be enlightened with regard to the pre- 
sent universal war waged against the independence 
of the Papacy, or rather against its temporal sove- 
reignty, without which no Pope can exercise freely 
and independently the spiritual functions of univer- 
sal pastor. " What, indeed, is it," says Bellarmine, 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



" which is brought into question when there is ques- 
tion of the Pontifical supremacy? It is, in one word, 
the very existence of Christianity. For then the 
question really is, whether the Church should conti- 
nue to exist, or fall to pieces and disappear. ,, * All 
the Protestant sects unite with infidelity and revolu- 
tionism in urging on public opinion and the States 
of what was once Christendom against the Holy See. 
But they do not see how their own existence, and 
that of the Christian religion itself, are involved in 
the extinction of this independence. " The churches 
at enmity with the universal Church," says Count de 
Maistre, " subsist notwithstanding only by means of 
the latter, although they may little imagine it ; like 
those parasite plants, those sterile excrescences which 
live only on the substance of the tree that supports 
them, and is impoverished by them."f 

It would not be prudent to allow one's children to 
go forth into the busy world and have their ears 
assailed by the many objections which the sects 
bring against the Church, without having prepared 
them beforehand with a proper answer to all and 
each. This, of course, applies mainly to educated 
women, who have had the leisure and opportunity of 
well studying these doctrinal differences. But we 
have met beneath the roof of the labouring man and 
the artisan with mothers thoroughly read up in these 
matters, and well skilled, too, in the use of their 
theological weapons. 

Young girls are also to be warned in time against 

* Prcefatio in librum de Summo Pontifice. 
t Considerations sur la France, p. 33. 



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WHAT GIRLS ARB NOT TO READ. 



237 



the arguments used by infidelity and materialism 
mnder the name of " Modern Science." They are to 
be told that, apart from the very imperfect deduc- 
tions of some hostile geologists, there is not an ar- 
gument used by Darwin, orTyndall, or Huxley, that 
has not been rehashed from the works of the ancient 
Greek philosophy ; not a form of error which has 
not again and again been denounced, refuted, and 
anathematised by the Church. 

At the close of the last century, and during the 
Reign of Terror in France, Count de Maistre wrote : 
"The present generation is witnessing one of the 
greatest spectacles ever offered to the eyes of men, 
the mortal combat between Philosophism and Chris- 
tianity. The lists are opened, the two adversaries 
are engaged, and the whole world is looking on."* 
Girls, as well as young men, are thus more firmly 
grounded in their faith and prepared to defend it 
against all comers. They see in the present designs 
of Darwinians, radicals, and revolutionists only the 
continuance of the old warfare against God and his 
truth, and in their pretended "new" theories and 
discoveries the old, old tales of the father of lies re- 
echoed from age to age throughout all time. 

WHAT GIRLS ARE NOT TO READ. 

Together with this solid and religious instruction, 
impart to every one of your girls a deep horror of 
the licentious and romantic literature of the day. 
Their inborn good sense will enable them to feel that 
it is just as dangerous and as fatal to allow the mind 

* Ibidem, p. 79, published in 1796. 



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238 THE HIRBOR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



to feed upon the thousand-and-one " Cheap Novels," 
"Illustrated Weeklies," and " Fireside," or "Sear- 
side libraries/ ' as it would be on entering forest or 
fields in summer or autumn, to eat of the bright* 
coloured berries of unknown kinds, or of the beauti- 
ful and tempting forms of mushroom that coyer the 
earth all around. 

Let their rule be to read only what they know to 
be good, and never to touch what they know to be 
bad, or what they suspect is so. One of the first 
principles of morality is, that all rational beings ac- 
countable to God for their actions, should be able to 
assign a lawful motive for every act of theirs. It is 
no justification for me, either in presence of my own 
reason, or before the divine judgment, that I have 
the power of doing such or such a thing, if I choose; 
I must further justify my doing it by the reason that 
it is good, useful, and lawful to me to do what I am 
impelled to. If I have any fears as to the act being 
wrong or hurtful, I am bound to suspend my action 
till I am better informed. 

This applies to the works which in every shape, 
and at the lowest prices, are continually poured on 
the book market to entice the appetite of our boys 
and girls. Mothers cannot be too careful in protect- 
ing their dear ones against this impure deluge, and 
in cautioning them, when they are grown up, against 
the dreadful effect of these literary poisons. 

INSPIRE THEM WITH A HORROR OP INDECENT PRINTS. 

Just as a conscientious, God-fearing girl would not 
r$ad one page or one line of a book she knew to be 
bad, even so must she be taught to turn her eyes 



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OIBLS TO BE TAUGHT THE VALUE OF TIME. 239 

away, unhesitatingly and instinctively, from an 
indecent engraving, or painting, or sculpture, no 
matter where she happens upon it. Make her un- 
derstand that this is a matter of high principle, a 
matter between her soul and the All-seeing ; so that 
even when alone she stumbles on such objects, she 
would turn her eyes and her whole mind away from 
the object, as she would withdraw her hand or 
arm from the contact of red-hot iron. 

GIRLS TO BE TAUGHT THE VALUE OP TIME. 

Not less important to the future welfare of your 
children, than anything you can teach them, is the 
priceless value you should accustom them to set upon 
time. Mothers — wealthy mothers in particular — 
cannot weigh too seriously and conscientiously how 
strictly the just Judge will call them to account for 
the use of the hours, and days, and years which are 
wasted in idleness, even though not misspent in vice 
and dissipation. There are some persons who live 
as though they never had been taught when young 
that the Great Giver of life, and time, and hourly 
opportunities, would surely exact of them one day 
a minute account of the use made of every sun that 
rose upon them, and of every hour that marks his 
course. 

Mothers, such as we suppose our readers to be, 
cannot plead ignorance of their early knowledge of 
the sacred obligation of employing every moment of 
time to good purpose, and, surely, they will not allow 
son or daughter of theirs to be ignorant in so vital 
a matter. 

It is in childhood, and in youth especially, that 



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240 THE MIRROR OP TRITE WOMAWIIOOD. 

every day is of priceless value, when, in simplest 
truth, every precious hour well employed is a seed 
sown in the furrow, and covered over with the 
fostering earth, and blessed of God from on high to 
bring forth certain increase in due season. But 
every day and hour idled away or misspent in doing 
anything and everything but what one ought to do, 
is an opportunity thrown away for self-improvement, 
for progress in all true goodness, or, what is infinitely 
worse, given to the service of the arch-enemy of souls, 
and of their Almighty Creator. 

Our lost days are dead leaves strewing the street 
along which we daily travel, lying as they fell, and 
never to bloom or live again. They are " ears of 
wheat " given us to sow for food of life eternal, and 
which we have not cast into the furrow, but thrown 
on the highway, to be " trodden into clay." They 
are " golden coins " confided to our husbandry, with 
which the Giver intended we should purchase 
eternity, and we have squandered them against his 
will ! But they are " still to pay." . . . And 
presently, when youth has quickly passed, and old 
age is before us, like the dry-bed of a river out of 
which almost the last drop has been drained, we 
would fain go back to drink of these sweet waters of 
our life ; but they are like " spilt water " thrown on 
the burning soil, and cheating the ever-thirsting 
throats of " men in hell." 

We must not deceive ourselves : every moment of 
time is ourself living during that brief space, every 
hour and day, is our own soul filling that hour and 
that day with its deeds of good or ill. 

You have heard of the " transit" or passage of a 



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GIRLS TO BE TAUGHT THE VALUE OP TIME. 241 

star across the sun's disk : astronomers watch it with 
their telescopes, and count by minutes and seconds 
the apparition of a little black speck on the bright 
round luminary, while it mores rapidly across it to 
the opposite side, to be apparently lost in the un- 
measured heavens beyond. The span of our life, as 
compared with eternity, is like that bright broad 
face of the sun projected on the immensity of space 
behind it; and the stages of our passage through 
life are as brief and as rapid as the transit of yonder 
planet across the sun. At every minute and seoond 
it is " myself " who am moving before the eye of 
the all-seeing and all-remembering God. I enter 
life like one emerging from the boundless void 
behind me, and appear moving, moving across the 
narrow circle of my life during the few fleeting years 
given me to exist, and then I pass out of the sight of 
mortal man into that other limitless eternity beyond. 

But brief as is my passage across the narrow 
sphere allotted to me, I can merit, while it lasts, to 
shine for ever " from eternity to eternity," or to dis- 
appear for ever from that heaven where my glory 
might have been commensurate in duration with 
that of the sun's Creator. Yes, to God's eye, every 
moment of my existence here below is " myself pass- 
ing over the circle of this life of trial,' ' it is myself 
living for God, or forgetting Him, or working against 
Him, while the resistless motion of the heavens 
hurry me from my birth to my death ; from time to 
eternity; from the use or abuse of the golden 
moments, and days, and hours, to tho terrible, un- 
avoidable, and most righteous judgment of the 
Eternal God. 

17 



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242 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

When "my time" is past, and that judgment is 
at hand, I shall look back upon the misspent years, 
each year shall be myself, looking my conscience full 
in the face, 

" • I am thyself —what hast thou done with me ? 
And I-and I ! 9 " 

And what I have made myself, by actual deadly guilt 
unrepented of, God will adjudge me to remain un- 
changed and unchangeable throughout all eternity ! 

We have known men, born, alas ! amid wealth, and 
nursed in the lap of unlimited indulgence, who, 
having grown up in vice, without any other god but 
their animal appetite, and without any apparent 
sense of responsibility for youth and manhood wasted 
in eating, drinking, and dreaming, would say to their 
own young children as these reproved them for their 
sloth : " What sin am I committing P I am doing 
no one harm ! " Had they passed out of life, as these 
words were uttered, into the hands of Him who 
giveth to everyone according to hie way, and according to 
the fruit of his devices* they would have known what 
is the terrible and irreparable guilt of a wasted life. 

MINUTES ARB THE GOLDEN SANDS OP TIME. 

Elsewhere, in your office of mistress of the home, 
we have pointed out the necessity of order towards a 
proper and fruitful economy of time ; this love of 
order you must make a second nature in every one of 
your dear ones ; and, besides, you must begin early 
to impress them with the priceless importance of 
having neither idle hours nor idle moments. Of 

* Jerem, xvii, 10. 



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MINUTES ABB THE GOLDEN SANDS OF TIME. 243 



oourse, we count not these hours as idle or ill-spent 
which follow the day's toil, and are devoted by all in 
the home of the labouring man, as well as in the 
mansion of the wealthy, or the halls of the prince, to 
pure and blessed family recreation and enjoyment. 
If mothers and fathers, children, visitors, and guests, 
would only make it a rule to join heartily in these 
"fireside entertainments," they would find these 
sweet evening hours to be the source of the purest 
domestio happiness, the preservative of family inno- 
cence, blessed of God, and praised by all friends and 
acquaintance. 

What we urge upon the attention of mothers is the 
value they should teach their children to attach to 
what the French call "lost moments," moments perdus, 
the little leisure moments or intervals that occur 
during the daily hours of labour, study, or occupa- 
tion. They, too, ought to be applied to some special 
and profitable use. 

Such moments in the day are like the grains of 
gold carried down from the mountain in the river 
streams, and mixed up with sand along their shores. 
Each grain in itself is of little account; but the 
miner knows its value, and his husbandry teaches 
him how to separate the grains of the precious metal 
from the dull, valueless matter in which it is buried, 
till, at the end of his day's toil, he has amassed the 
beginning of a treasure, and, with the persevering 
industry which adds together the gains of many 
successive days, he soon acquires a fortune. Do not 
the wise men of the world repeat to you daily that 
time is gold? Assuredly it is, even for the ends of 
the lower earthly life j but for the higher purposes 



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244 THE MTRROB OT TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



of life, and, in particular, for the highest of all, is 
not every second of time a grain of the golden sands P 
And are not these sands the " golden coins 99 with 
which we may purchase, not only all intellectual and 
moral excellence, but his friendship to whom alone 
belongs eternity? 

WHAT CAN BE MADE OUT OF ODD MOMENTS. 

This industrious husbandry of time, joined to per- 
sistence and perseverance in carrying out any good 
purpose, is, in itself, more than a fortune for every 
son and daughter of yours whom you will teach and 
help to acquire it. 

"We remember once travelling with a noble French 
lady and her husband, bearing one of the great his- 
oric names of his country, and from the moment the 
train left the station till it arrived in Paris, she and 
her daughter never ceased their knitting, thus pre- 
paring sundry articles for an orphanage they be- 
friended. Every " lost " or " odd moment " of theirs 
was thus devoted to the poor. It is also well known 
how many useful arts, languages, and sciences have 
been, and are daily acquired by turning to good 
account these otherwise " lost moments." Indeed, it 
is on record that some of the most splendid monu- 
ments of which letters and the sciences can boast 
were begun and accomplished during these odd 
moments, which else would have been truly lost 
moments. 

One sort of industry can be acquired by girls 
during these intervals between work and meals, or 
between one set occupation and another, and that 
is needle- work, including, of course, embroidery. 



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Needle-wort, in our day, is becoming rather a com- 
paratively rare accomplianment ; machine- work tends 
to supersede the deft cunning which belonged to the 
fingers of our grandmothers. If sewing-machines 
only lightened the burden of our poor seamstresses 
and milliners ! But we know that the hearts of our 
millionaire merchants become pitiless in proportion 
to the number of machines they employ, and as un- 
feeling towards the wants and hardship of the poor 
slaves who work them as the very steel and iron 
which replace the human hand. 

But precisely because mechanical operations tend, 
in every department of industry, and in many depart- 
ments of art, to take the place of handicraft, we 
ought to cherish, in all good families, intelligent skill 
in all kinds of handiwork. There are many, very 
many ladies, the most distinguished by birth, position, 
and accomplishments, who can do everything, and 
have taught their daughters to do everything, from 
painting, embroidery, and sewing of all descriptions, 
to the minutest details of cookery. Are they less dear 
to their households on that account ? or are they less 
worshipped by husband and children? or less re- 
spected by servants and dependents ? Our readers 
can answer for us. ^ 

VALUE TO BE ATTACHED TO PRACTICES OF DEVOTION. 

If there is a most skilful and thrifty husbandry 
in thus employing time, and in acquiring the skill and 
habits which make one's existence most useful to 
others, and most delightful to the home-circle, there 
is a spiritual husbandry and science which are to be 
practised early and late by mother and daughters 



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246 THE MIRROR OP TEUB WOMANHOOD. 



Of the number of what are called "practices of 
devotion," or of their nature, this is not the place to 
treat : it is the province of the enlightened spiritual 
guide to direct the individual soul in their use. 

We therefore confine ourselves to saying that it 
would not be wise in mothers to cumber their 
daughters with too many of these practices. But in 
these, as in morning and evening prayers, the recita- 
tion of the "Angelus," the preparation for the 
sacraments, the devout attention during the divine 
offices, it is impossible to insist on too much earnest- 
ness, reverence, and fervour. 

Even the " devotions " which are not performed 
generally in non- Catholic countries, like the " Ange- 
lus," have a sublime sense to the Protestant mind 
when properly explained. For what can be more 
magnificent, in Catholic lands, than the custom when 
the Angelus bell sounds at dawn, and noon, and sun- 
set, to see every man, woman, and child stand still, 
every head uncovered, and every knee bent to worship 
the Incarnate God, the Author of the Christian faith, 
the Second Parent of the human race, and to renew 
towards the Second Eve, the Mother of the new life, 
Gabriel's salutation, " Hail, full of grace ! the Lord 
is with thee ! " It is as if the united voice of 
Christendom, and in it the voice of the entire race, 
went up thrice each day to thank the incomprehen- 
sible Goodness, who sent his only-begotten Son to be 
the Teacher, Guide, and Consoler of the entire 
human family. 

When the Wise Men in the Gospel had come from 
the far East to Bethlehem, and had been directed by 
the star to the wayside cave in which the Mother and 



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247 



the Babe had found a refuge, they— first-fruits of 
heathendom — as if in the name of us all, "falling 
down, adored Him " on his Mother's knees. Is it 
not what we do still ? And in this great city of New 
York, how many of our professional men, of our 
hard-worked business men, who interrupt every oc- 
cupation when noon is nigh, to lift heart and silent 
voice to the throne of that same incarnate God, and 
unite their prayer with that of the Church the whole 
world over ! 

It was the universal custom in Catholic countries, 
at the sound of the Angelus or Ave Maria bell, that 
all labour and all conversation should cease in street, 
in field, on highway, in court and camp — all un- 
covered to join in the salutation. The great heart of 
the busy world stood still thrice a day, and forgot 
its pursuits and its cares, to salute Christ's Mother, 
and adore Himself ! Was it not a sublime custom? 
And are those lands in aught the better to-day that 
so many do not worship Christ, or pay daily reverence 
to the true Mother of all the living ? 

And most beautiful, instructive, and improving are 
all these sweet immemorial practices of popular devo- 
tion — the sign of the cross, the use of holy water, of 
blessed candles, the devotion of the rosary, that of 
the way of the cross, and the love which the Church 
is labouring to enkindle and spread on every land 
towards that Heart which was pierced for us in death, 
and in which our names are written. 

Let mothers be zealous not only in obtaining 
themselves full instruction on all these points, but 
in communicating it to their sons and daughters. 
Sons thus taught will not be apt, though going forth 



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24$ THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD, 

from never so poor a home, to forget the early piety 
which lies so deep in mind and heart, or to turn away 
from the faith of their mothers ; and such daughters 
will be its true apostles everywhere. 

THE MOTHER'S GUIDANCE WITH RESPECT TO 
MATRIMONY. 

There are two things which the true mother will 
not fail to do in order to save her child from a wrong 
choice, and from the irreparable misery it would 
bring. 

The first is to accustom her to attach no import- 
ance whatever to a handsome face or fine personal 
appearance as compared with the higher qualities of 
goodness, purity of life, honour, truthfulness, tem- 
perance, and fortitude, all of which go to make up 
the one attribute of manliness in its true sense : add 
to this that which in God's present providence con- 
stitutes the perfection and glorious crown of man- 
hood — enlightened and practical faith — and you will 
have placed before your daughter's mind the ideal 
husband to whom alone a true Christian maiden 
could give the worship of her love. 

Nor need you, nor, indeed, ought you, to paint 
true manliness to the young girl with the avowed 
purpose of describing the only desirable husband, or 
even a husband at all. Form her judgment by 
making her prize the qualities that enter into such a 
character, and giving her a contempt of their oppo- 
sites. That will be sufficient to prompt to a good 
choice when the proper time has come, and to keep 
her back from a wrong choice. Of course, when the 
thought of matrimony has come, it will bo a no less 



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THE UOTHEB'S GUIDANCE. 



249 



sacred duty (or you to pray yourself, and to make 
your child pray, and seek in the sacraments new 
light and strength, never refused to all who ask for 
such in this momentous crisis of life. 

The second is, without warning your child, to keep 
away from your home all young men who would not 
be desirable matches, and to invite or admit only 
those who are, in your judgment, and that of your 
husband, most likely to be worthy companions for 
the innocent girl you have reared. Remember that 
you have to consult your child's happiness infinitely 
more than your own ; and, in selecting the man 
whom you would have for son in your family, select 
him unselfishly, for his own real worth and his pure 
devotion to your daughter, as well as because of her 
disposition, her heartfelt love for him, and the like- 
lihood of their being truly devoted to each other 
through life. 

If God has blest you with a good husband; if 
your mutual affection and your being all in all to 
0 each other have been, under God, the source of all 
your wedded bliss, and the secret, too, of your pros- 
perity, then see to it well whether or not the young 
people whose union you desire are sure to be com- 
panions for each other. If not, let no inducement 
make you encourage a friendship or an acquaintance 
between them. 

On this point every mother who has both a true 
womanly heart, and the fear of God before her eyes, 
will avoid with the utmost care the guilt and folly of 
so many women who, in choosing for their daughters, 
consult nothing but their own selfish liking or dislike, 
their worldly intcrost, the temporal advantages which 



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250 



THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



may accrue to themselves and the other members of 
their families, leaving entirely out of the question 
the inclinations of the poor girl herself, or her pro* 
spects of happiness or unhappiness. 

Such conduct is highly criminal, and is sure to 
bring swift retribution with it. 

VOCATIONS TO EELIGI0T78 LIFE. 

As to those of your daughters who feel called to 
the higher, the Virginal Life, do not presume to 
put obstacles in the way. There are many certain 
indications pointing out to a pious and unselfish 
mother's eye that her child is called to the divine 
service. There are rules laid down by God's Church, 
and sanctioned by the practice of so many centuries, 
all directing both the child herself in the examination 
of her own heart and its motives, and enlightening 
the priest and the theologian in his appreciation of 
all the reasons for and against such a vocation. If 
both your child and yourself are guided by the sole 
desire of doing God's will, and if you fervently pray 
Him to make that will known, there is little danger 
of your going astray. 

If the mother, in a matter so weighty as this really 
seeks to find out what God wills, and is resolved to 
fulfil it, and not to prefer her own to it, then she will 
not manifest anger towards her child, abuse her as if 
she were attempting to do what is wrong and unlaw- 
ful, or treat the priest who directs her as if he were 
stealing away her heart's treasure unjustifiably and 
unwarrantably. 

You have brought up your daughters to love all 
that was best and holiest, to consider God's will as 



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SPECIAL CARE NEEDED IN EDUCATING B0T8. 251 

the supreme law of angels and men, and God's 
service as the most honourable and blissful occupa- 
tion of man or angel. Bless God when you have 
quietly and surely found out that your child wants 
to give herself to Him all the days of her life : take 
your child yourself to the altar, as Anna of old took 
her first-born, Samuel — her only one— and offer her 
to Him who will be her portion for ever, and reward 
your generosity with untold blessings. 

II. 

SPECIAL CARE NEEDED IN EDUCATING BOY8. 

While bestowing such constant care on her girls, 
the Christian mother must be mindful of the special 
difficulties which attend the education of boys, of the 
terrible struggles which await men in the battle of 
life, and of the imperious necessity of so arming 
their souls in advance as to put all the chances of 
victory on their side. Your boy is doomed to battle 
with the general corruption, the low thoughts, the 
low aims, the low tastes, and the lower manners of 
the generation among whom his lot is cast ; he will 
have to battle with inveterate and powerful preju- 
dices against his faith, with a current of scientific 
opinion, gathering daily fresh depth and width, and 
tending to sap the very foundations of revealed reli- 
gion ; against the influence of a literature and a press 
bitterly hostile to all that he has been taught to look 
up to with reverence and worship ; against a " human 
respect" more seductive and degrading than the 
witchery of the fabled enchantress of old, who only 
held out to thirsting lips a cup full of all delights, and 



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252 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



then changed all who had tasted it into beasts, and 
kept them beasts for ever ; and, what is worse than 
all, he will have to battle with his own heart and its 
inclinations amid a world solely occupied in minister* 
ing to sensuality and passion. God alone, with his 
fear and his love firmly seated in the heart, while it 
is as yet free from sin and evil habits, will be all- 
powerful to give courage, and strength, and perse- 
verance, and final triumph, even to the best and 
bravest against such a combination of adversaries. 

See how many of the boys you behold yearly 
kneeling in our churches for first communion or con- 
firmation fail to hold their virtue, or even their faith, 
firmly till manhood. If your eye could follow each 
generation as it grows up, the few who remain stead- 
fast in the piety or faith of their youth are like the 
rare ears of corn on the harvest-field when the sickles 
of the reapers have disappeared, and the sheaves 
have been housed. 

It-is of all duties the most important, as well as 
the most difficult, to ground your boys in true piety, 
and in that true Christian manliness of which piety 
is the beautiful crown. Think of the heroic temper 
which the great Christian soldier mentioned in the 
following passage must have received from hi* 
mother's teaching, and consider well how you are to 
imitate her in your training of every boy of yours. 

" "When the venerable Marshal de Mouchy was led 
to execution for having protected priests and other 
devoted victims, as they were hurrying him from the 
Luxembourg, a voice was heard from the crowd 
saying, * Courage, Mouchy ! Courage, Mouchy ! 9 
Tho hero turned to them who were by his side, and 



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SPECIAL CAItE NEEDED IN EDT70ATIKG BOYS. 253 

said : 1 When I was sixteen years of age, I mounted 
tlie breach for my king ; now that I am eighty-four, 
I shall not want courage to mount the scaffold for 
my God!'"* 

Is not your purpose to form such true men as 
this, men so filled with the sense of duty that at six- 
teen they would be ready to brave death at the call 
of country, and in extreme old age brave the rage of 
an impious crowd, and the horrors of a public execu- 
tion, to maintain the faith of their boyhood ? Yes, 
here is the model man ; one who has been taught 
and is accustomed from infancy to fear God alone, to 
serve Him in the performance of every civil and every 
religious duty, ready at any moment, from boyhood 
to the feeblest old age, to discharge conscientious 
duty fearless of every consequence. Whoso is true 
to God all through life cannot fail to be true to 
country and every trust imposed on him. 

We have said above that the life of every Christian 
man must be an intellectual and moral warfare 
against error and infidelity. There are countries, too 
— Russia, Germany, Italy, Switzerland, and France — 
where persecution is abroad, and likely not to end 
with the present century, and where, consequently, 
Catholic men must go forth from their mothers' 
homes filled with the spirit of the ancient martyrs 
and the more recent crusaders. Will you, mothers, 
who read this, prepare your sons for the strife, and 
fill them with the glorious spirit which shone in the 

• Mazas, Vies des Grandes CapUaines Francais du Moyen 
Age, tome iii., p. 220— as quoted by Digby in his "Broad 
£ \one of Honour." 



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254 



THE MIRROR 01 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



Seven Machabee Martrys,* or that which Si Sym- 
phorosa poured into her seven boys ?f 

THE IDEAL OF TRUE MANHOOD* 

There was, at the most hopeless period of the 
history of Christendom, and when the deluge of 
Barbarism seemed to have utterly swept away with 
the Eoman empire the first growth of Christian 
civilisation, a man who went forth from Ireland at 
the head of a band of missionaries, and undertook to 
begin anew the labour of reviving throughout all 
Western Europe the love of religion, piety, letters, and 
gentleness. France, Germany, Switzerland, and Italy 
have never ceased to treasure the remembrance of his 
glorious services. It was an age of violence lawless- 
ness, lust, and blood ; and Columbanus set himself 
with his companions to raise high, high, and ever 
higher still, the level of divine love and supernatural 
excellence in their own hearts and lives, that they 
might thereby be enabled to raise the level of all 
goodness and excellence in the dark, warring, sensual 
mass of humanity around them. And thus these 
model men, the apostles of their age, passed through 
Gaul and Northern Germany and Italy like a vision 
of supernatural beings exalted between heaven and 
earth, compelling men to look up and admire and 
envy such unearthly goodness, drawing after them, 
as the vision passed to and fro, the hearts of the 
multitude and crowds of imitators, and thereby 
renewing slowly but surely the face of the earth. 

Swarms of devoted disciples were left behind by 

* See " Heroic Women of the Bible and the Church," oh. xix. 
t « Lives of the Saints," July 18. 



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THIS IDEAL OF TRUE MANHOOD. 255 

the great Irish patriaroh, in numerous monasteries 
and monastic schools, which became in the surrounding 
districts centres of a new spiritual and intellectual 
renovation, till the earth began to rest once more 
from the convulsions and wars of centuries, and God's 
work through his Church began to prosper anew in 
peace and beauty and holiness of life. 

It was an age of ruthless warfare and lawless vio- 
lence, we have said ; and these men had schooled them- 
selves under their heroio leader to the use of weapons 
and methods which might beat down the lance of the 
robber and break the bloody sword of brutal power. 

Would you know what was the ideal Columbanus 
set before himself, before those who gave themselves 
with him to a life of apostolic abnegation and labour, 
and to all who studied in their schools or sought to 
walk in the paths of Christian manhood under their 
direction P Here it is in brief. The Christian youth 
and man of that age, so much like our own in the 
deluge which sweeps over Christendom, should be : 

"Fearless in the cause of Truth, but shrinking 
timidly from worldly contentions ; before the Divine 
Goodness, like a beggar seeking alms, in presence of 
the wicked, like a soldier unconquered ; docile as a 
babe towards his elders and superiors, running in the 
race of virtue with the ardour of a giant along with 
one's juniors ; loving to be all in all to his equals, 
but straining every nerve to rise up to the level of the 
Perfect ; meanwhile, never envying the excellence of 
those above him, nor showing jealousy of the swifter 
in the race, nor speaking ill of those who had kept 
him back, but responding promptly and generously 
to the voice of those who called on him to advance." 



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256 THE MTRROB OP TRUE WOMANHOOD* 

Here, then, 0 mothers, we place in your hand a 
mirror in which you can view at a glance all the 
chief characters of that true manhood on which you 
have to form your boys. Let each one of you call 
your son to look into this mirror with you, so that he 
may become enamoured of the divine likeness pictured 
therein. And let us take every one of these linea- 
ments separately, and study it well, just as some 
painters do before copying a great master-piece, 
dividing the whole surface into small squares, so that 
they may be sure to reproduce exactly every feature 
and line. 

FEABLESS IN THE CAUSE OF TRUTH. 

On this leading feature of Christian manhood, we 
need not dwell at much length : what has been already 
said about the spirit of faith, and a life of faith, sup- 
poses that your boy has not only been thoroughly 
instructed in all that pertains to his religion, but that 
you have laboured to inspire him with an enthusiastic 
love of it, and a chivalrous zeal in its defence. 

This chivalrous zeal is, however, the very point on 
which we would have you dwell for a few moments. 
The forms of ancient knighthood, as blessed by the 
Church in the ages of faith, have passed away ; but 
the spirit of chivalry has not, and never will, so long 
as the faith of Christ is a living reality on earth. 
Hear, then, what is meant by that spirit, what virtues 
it supposes in the man who lives up to it, and what 
are its high practical obligations. "We take the 
lesson from authentic history. 

We are, in 1257, at 'Cologne, and assisting at a 
solemn ceremony — the knighting by a papal legate of 



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FEABLESB IN THE CAUSE OF TRUTH. 257 

a young prince, elected Zing of the Komans, and 
soon to be crowned as Emperor of Germany. Mass 
has been celebrated, and William, Count of Holland, 
who has only reached the preparatory degree of 
squire, is presented to the legate in these words : 
" We place before you this squire, humbly beseech- 
ing that in your fatherly kindness you would accept 
his desires that he may become worthy of associating 
among knights." 

To which the cardinal-legate replies, addressing 
himself to the young prince: ' 'What is a knight 
according to the meaning of the word ? Whoso de- 
sireth to obtain knighthood must be high-minded, 
open-hearted, generous, superior, and firm : — high- 
minded in adversity, open-hearted in his connections, 
generous in honour, superior in courtesy, and firm in 
manly honesty. But before you make your vow, take 
this yoke of the Order which you desire into mature 
consideration. 

" These are the rules of chivalry : 1st. Before all, 
with pious remembrance, every day to hear the Mass 
of God's Passion. 2nd. To risk body and life boldly 
for the Catholic faith. 3rd. To protect Holy Church, 
with her servants, from everyone who will attack 
her. 4th. To search out widows and helpless orphans 
in their necessity. 5th. To avoid engaging in unjust 
wars. 6th. To refuse unreasonable (excessive) re- 
wards. 7th. To fight for the vindication of innocence. 
8th. To pursue warlike exercises only for the sake of 
perfecting warlike skill. 9th. To obey the Roman 
emperor, or his deputy, with reverence in all temporal 
matters. 10th. To hold inviolable the public good. 
11th. In no way to alienate the feudal tenures of thp 
18 



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258 THE MIBBOE OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

empire. 12th. And, without reproach before God or 
man, to live in the world. 

" When you shall have faithfully attended to these 
laws of chivalry, know that you shall obtain temporal 
honour on earth, and, this life ended, eternal happi- 
ness in heaven." 

When the solemn oath on the Gospels had been 
taken, the rank of knighthood was conferred on the 
kneeling suppliant in these words : 

" For the honour of God Almighty I make you a 
knight, and do you take the obligation. But re- 
member how He was smitten in the presence of the 
high-priest Annas, how He was mocked by Pilate the 
governor, how He was beaten with scourges, crowned 
with thorns, and, arrayed in royal robe, was derided 
before King Herod, and how He, naked before all 
the people, was hanged upon the cross. I counsel 
you to think upon his reproach, and I exhort you to 
take upon you his cross." 

THE CHIVALROUS SPIRIT MOST NEEDED IN OUR DAY. 

Most instructive and consoling are these monu- 
mental teachings of the past. They show how our 
ancestors considered our dear Lord as the Model of 
all manly generosity, devotion, and self-sacrifice. 
Looking over these rules, and substituting for the 
words "Koman emperor or his deputy," those of 
" lawful supreme authorities," and for " feudal ten- 
ures of the empire," the expression " national terri- 
tory," we have a complete code of religious patriotism 
adapted to the sore needs of our own epoch, and 
most acceptable to every young man in love with the 
interests of religion, country, justice, and humanity 



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259 



"We cannot trust ourselves to dwell at length on so 
rich and tempting a topic. Many occasions will offer 
themselves before the end of this book for recalling 
now one rule and now another. 

But no one can give a more eloquent and satisfac- 
tory illustration of this first point of his own legisla- 
tion than Columbanus himself, the fearless, the 
heroic, the invincible amid persecutions which 
compelled him to go from province to province, and 
kingdom to kindgom. When driven from Burgundy 
by Queen Brunehild, and forced apparently to re- 
nounce forever the apostleship in the countries which 
he had so immensely benefited, he writes to one of 
his disciples whom he had appointed to govern his 
monasteries during this enforced exile : 

" I had intended at first to write you a sad and 
tearful letter; but, knowing the weight of labour 
and anxiety that oppresses you, I have changed my 
style, and sought to dry up your tears rather than bid 
them flow. I have allowed nothing but sweetness to 
appear in my words, and have locked up my grief in 
the bottom of my heart. 

"But lo! my own tears break forth! . : . 
They must be driven back, however; for a good 
soldier may not weep when just about to combat. 
After all, our misfortune is not a new one. Is not 
our fate what we so often preached to others to be 
continually prepared for? Was there not once a 
philosopher, excelling all others in wisdom, who was 
cast into prison for having maintained, in opposition ■ 
to the popular belief, that there is but one God ? 

"Besides, the Gospel is full of such encourage- 
ments as we need. And, truly, one might think 



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260 TUB MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

that they were chiefly written to exhort the true 
disciples of Christ crucified to follow their Master, 
bearing each his own cross. Our dangers are many ; 
the war which threatens us is raging fiercely, and our 
enemy is in every way formidable. But there is 
glory to be gained by the struggle. . • . 

" Take away the enemy, and there is no struggle; 
and where there is no struggle there is no crown. . 
. . . Where one has to struggle, there one finds 
courage, watchfulness, earnestness, patience, fidelity, 
wisdom, firmness, and prudence. In the absence of 
this warfare there is but unhappiness and disaster. 

" So, then, no struggle, no crown! And I add: no 
liberty, no worth or dignity ! " * 

The old man had been sent down the river Loire 
under escort to Nantes, in order to be thence sent on 
a ship to Ireland. While there, and waiting for the 
craft that was to bear him to his native country, he 
poured out his soul in exhortations and directions to 
his disciples in Gaul. His unbending firmness and 
fearlessness, which recall so vividly the prophet Elias, 
were united to a tenderness of heart, which reminds 
one of a mother's love for the dear ones she is leaving 
behind. 

" While I am writing these words," the glorious 
old champion of Christian truth and morality says, in 
conclusion, " someone comes in to say that they are 
getting my vessel ready, the vessel that is to bear me 
towards my own country. The end of the parchment 
also forces me to make an end of writing. Love 
ignores logical order, and that is what makes this 
letter so confused. I wished to say everything in brief, 

* Translated from Montalembert's Moines d' Occident. 



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LET YOUB SONS BE THEIR SISTERS* SERVANTS. 261 

but in vain. . . . Pray for me, dear hearts, that 
I may live for God alone ! " 

God, for whom alone he lived and laboured, inter- 
posed miraculously, and the vessel was driven back 
by the waves and stranded on the beach, while the 
apostle and his companions were sent to another of 
the Prankish kingdoms to continue their work of 
regeneration. 

But from that classic beach at the mouth of the 
Loire does not that voice of power come to us across 
the deep, across the wide gulf of twelve centuries, to 
repeat to every Christian mother, and to every son 
she rears, the thrilling words : "Be the soldier of 
Truth. . . . Our dangers are many ; our enemy 
is formidable ; and the weir in which we must share 
is raging fiercely. But the field of battle is the field 
of glory. No struggle, no crown ! No liberty, no 
honour or dignity ! " 

LET YOUR SONS BE THEIR SISTERS' DEVOTED SERVANTS. 

We cannot impress too earnestly this lesson upon 
you, whether you be the poor toiler in the cottage, or 
the wealthy mistress of a palace. Be such in your 
life, in your whole deportment, that your sons may 
believe that there does not exist on earth a mother or 
a woman like you. Let them be made to understand, 
as early as possible, that men are to treat all women 
with a sovereign respect. We once saw in one of the 
public conveyances of Paris a young nobleman, a 
foremost member of the Society of St. Vincent de 
Paul, get out of his place to help a poor, infirm old 
market-woman into the omnibus. She was cumbered 
with a large parcel, which he took from her, raising 



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262 THE MZHEOR OF TET7E WOMANHOOD. 



his hat to her as if she were a duchess, and then 
gracefully and gently helping her to a seat. As we 
passed the market in which she worked, he got out 
before her, holding her parcel with one hand and 
giving her the other to assist her to alight ; and then, 
taking off his hat, he kissed her hand to the no small 
astonishment of more than one of the passengers. 
She was only one of the many that he was in the 
habit of visiting weekly to distribute alms and spiritual 
comfort in the name of the Society. We did not ven- 
ture to question this noble Christian youth about 
this demonstration of reverence to one beneath him. 
But a friend who knew him well said that he had 
been taught to reverence his own mother in every 
person of her sex, in the aged particularly, and to 
that he added the veneration which Christian piety 
inspires for all who are the recipients of our 
charity. 

In such Christian families as his the familiarity 
which exists between brother and sisters is always 
accompanied with that feeling of profound respect 
for the weaker sex, of that invariable deference and 
courtesy Which will keep a well-bred brother always 
on the watch to help or serve his sister in everything, 
even though no stranger or any other member of the 
family happen to be present. He is taught to be 
devoted to his sisters wherever they are, at home or 
abroad. And one who has that true reverential 
feeling towards his mother and sisters cannot help 
extending it to every member of their sex as long as 
he lives. Is there nothing here that appeals to your 
motherly sense of self-respect? 



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263 



THB NECESSITY AND VALUE OF HOME-BRED COURTESY. 

Home is, after all, the great school of virtue, of 
faith and piety, as well as of that gentleness and devo- 
tion to the comfort of others, which constitute the 
soul of courtesy. It was because the lower classes of 
old Catholic countries were so full of deep faith and 
sincere piety, that they displayed before the woeful 
changes wrought by revolutionism such mutual re- 
spect, such gentleness, such inborn courtesy. " God 
bless your work ! " was the salutation which every 
stranger or wayfarer passing along the road ad- 
dressed to the labourer at his work. And "God 
bless you kindly ! " was the gentle response, as the 
ploughman looked away from his furrow, or the 
mason looked down from the wall he was rearing, or 
" God speed you safely ! " was the answering prayer. 
No matter how poor the cottage, or how comfortable, 
no one crossed the ever-open door without the greet- 
ing, " God save all here ! " and without hearing in 
return, "God save you kindly!" and "You are 
heartily welcome I " These forms of greeting are but 
straws on the surface of popular life and manners ; 
but surely they indicated the direction in which the 
current ran, and were significant of a warm, deep 
feeling of faith and neighbourly charity. 

Are we in aught the better for dropping these and 
so many other salutations and locutions from our 
vocabulary P Is our life in aught the happier, the 
more elevated or refined, because these currents are 
frozen or stand still ? or because " freer, easier, more 
independent and careless manners " usurp the place 
of the sweet customs of Catholic ages? In the 
harvest-fields of Spain and Portugal, the labourers 



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264 THE MIRBOE OF TKUE WOMANHOOD, 



will salute each other with words of praise and adora- 
tion in honour of the Holy Name, or in honour of 
the Immaculate Mother. And in conterminous fields 
one man or woman will take up the first verse of a 
well-known hymn, or of one of the glorious national 
ballads, and all the others will sing the next, and so 
on to the end, mixing religion with the popular songs 
which preserve the memory of the heroic achieve- 
ments of their ancestors. Who does not see that 
such customs presuppose the highest civilisation in 
the masses, and the very essence of that courtesy 
which can be and is high-bred in the peasant and 
the cottier, because bred by faith and piety and the 
love of all that is ennobling in the memories of the 
past? 

Home-bred courtesy is necessary from husband to 
wife and from wife to husband, from brother to 
sisters, and from sisters to brothers, else in what does 
the home of a Christian differ from that of a pagan, 
or even from the hut of a savage ? And to be true 
courtesy it must not be a mask put on for an occasion 
and then laid aside, but a habit springing from the 
interior life, from the thoughts of the mind and the 
affections of the heart, just as the veins of the maple- 
wood, and the rich tints of the mahogany, and the 
lovely colours of the rose are the work of the vital sap 
in tree and flower, not the artifice of human industry. 

But we specially insist on the necessity of home- 
bred courtesy for boys, and from their earliest boy- 
hood, if you would have it become a second nature. 
We plead this necessity to every mother of the 
labouring and the middle classes. For, be it said 
without offence to any, the courtesy which distin- 



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THE VALUE OF HOME- BRED OOUBTESY. 



265 



guished the ancestors of these classes in the old 
European homesteads has been sadly forgotten in the 
new. People who rise in the world — and here it is 
free to all classes to rise — are anxious to show that 
they are rising or have risen, and hence that off ensive- 
ness of self-assertion or the no less offensive display 
of excessive politeness which are meant to tell the 
beholder that u we are somebody ! " 

Young people are quite earnest in claiming to bo 
" ladies " and " gentlemen ; " but the important thing 
is to be gentle, to possess that habitual gentleness, the 
sister of piety, which is sure to produce courtesy, and 
without which there never has been, and never will 
be a true lady or gentleman. Go into Andalusia : 
the Spanish farmer there will start from his home 
amid the mountains to carry his crop of wine twenty, 
forty, sixty miles or more to the nearest town, or fur- 
ther still to the best market. He will hear early 
Mass before he starts, and nil his pockets with dried 
figs and peppers, of which he will make his noonday 
meal on stopping at a well-known fountain or well on 
the road. The water is his only beverage, and there 
is not a well or a spring within hundreds of miles 
whose qualities he is not familiar with. His mules 
are laden with the rich wines which fetch so high a 
price in London and New York. But he never 
dreams of tasting them on his way. Speak to him on 
the road and you will be charmed with his dignity 
of manner and high-bred courtesy. Converse with 
him in the posada or inn where he spends the night, 
and you will have a still more favourable opportunity 
of estimating his real civility and intelligence. You 
will say that such a race is a race of gentlemen. 



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266 THE MIBBOB OP TBUJS WOMANHOOD. 

It behoves the poor man and the labouring man 
among us to see to it that these qualities once believed 
to be inborn in his own blood shall not disappear in 
his children and grandchildren* And surely it be- 
hoves the well-born and the wealthy that true 
courtesy shall not disappear from their homes with 
true piety. 

We commend this reflection to mothers and fathers 
alike : can true piety be where a passionate temper 
rules the house, and where a blow and a curse are 
the usual accompaniments of reproof or punishment ? 
"We beseech parents to think well of this. Let them 
never suffer themselves to be rude towards their chil- 
dren ; and let them never tolerate in these anything 
approaching to rudeness towards each other. 

MOTHERS MUST NOT ALLOW THEIR DAUGHTERS TO BS 
THE SERVANTS OF THEIR BROTHERS. 

There are sad examples of the fatal mistake made 
by certain unwise and weak mothers in giving their 
boys, as these grow up, so large a place in the house 
that their daughters either seem in the way, or are 
obliged to devote themselves to the pleasure and 
caprice of their brothers. 

Two families are now present to our memory in 
which were contrasted the principles of a truly Chris- 
tian education, as set forth above, and the fostering 
in the sons of this spirit of selfishness. 

The latter was a home distinguished for its wealth ; 
and when the sons, grown up and coming home from 
college, brought their young friends and acquaint- 
ance with them, they were allowed to be the absolute 
masters of the house, and to make their slaves of all 



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MOTHERS MUST NOT ALLOW, ETC. 



267 



persons in it — parents, sisters, and servants. . These 
boys, thus made the gods of the household, whom all 
therein had to worship and obey, became utterly reck- 
less of the comfort or happiness of everybody about 
them. Brought up in selfishness, they gave themselves 
up in manhood to self-indulgence and dissipation, 
broke the hearts of their foolish parents, beggared their 
sisters, married beneath them, and went every one of 
them to ruin. 

Not so their next-door neighbours. They had seen 
better days before they came to their present abode. 
But the mother was the embodiment of all the gentle 
virtues that ever made home delightful. The sons, 
when the day's toil was ended, forgot, or seemed to 
forget, their own fatigue in making their mother and 
sisters happy. Every device that rare culture adorn- 
ing heartfelt piety could think of was brought 
nightly into play to make the ladies believe that they 
were the princesses of a fairy palace. And this 
courtesy and gentleness of manners followed all of 
them through life. The eldest brother, in particular, 
distinguished for his masculine strength and chival- 
rous patriotism, was blessed with a wife, nurtured 
like himself by a wise, firm, and gentle mother. 
Their children, from the first dawn of reason, were 
sweetly habituated to that unselfishness and gentle 
courtesy which the unobservant stranger might mis- 
take for weakness, but which, to the eyes of those 
who knew them well, were like the graceful and 
lovely creepers trained to adorn, but not to conceal, 
the fair proportions, rich material, and exquisite 
workmanship of some massive classic edifice. 

It is thus that you have to work, 0 mothers. 



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268 THE MIREOB OF TEUB WOMANHOOD. 

Where what seems but is not courtesy or genuine 
politeness appears in a man or a woman, the least 
shock or commotion will show how superficial and 
hollow is the quality you might be tempted to admire. 
False courtesy is like a light veneering of beautiful 
wood, laid over the coarse grain of common material, 
or like the thin layer of plastering placed on the front 
of a building and painted to resemble marble or 
granite ; but a slight knock will break this veneering 
and lay the natural coarse grain bare to the eye, and 
the first rain, or the first thaw after a frost will show 
that what you mistook at a distance for a marble 
palace was but a wretched sham. 

It is the solid material of nature, enriched by a 
long and thorough nurture, that can receive a high 
polish and keep it forever. Be it your care, mothers, 
to form in the heart of hearts of every son and 
daughter of yours the solid, substantial piety and 
gentleness of which we have been speaking. This is 
the structure that you have to raise. Its solidity and 
its beauty, fear it not, will resist the pelting of rain 
and hail, survive the action of the summer's heat and 
the winter's frost. 

MAKE HOME THE ONLY CENTRE OP AMUSEMENT FOB 
TOUR SONS. 

The training of daughters is, comparatively, an 
easy and a delightful task for mothers, for their 
daughters are ever at home ; but it is far otherwise 
with boys. An irresistible impulse leads these to 
seek companionship and amusement outside of the 
home. Hence arise most of the serious dangers and 
temptations for boys. 



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MIKE HOME THE CENTRE OF AMUSEMENT. 269 

One of a good and wise mother's most useful 
industries is to make home necmary to her sons. 
Let her provide for them there everything which can 
amuse and delight, as well as instruct ; and let her 
also encourage her boys to bring their young friends 
and companions home. She will thereby be able to 
see who and what these are, so as to select such as 
may be profitable companions and safe friends for 
after-life. 

We need not insist on the prudence which a mother 
must use in keeping away from her home and com- 
panionship with her children the rude and the vicious. 
She has to avoid giving offence ; she alone can find 
means to unite firmness, decision, and gentleness in 
guarding her dear ones from evil. 

At any rate, when your boys have grown up, it 
must be a part of your duty to entertain hospitably 
such friends as they may invite to your home. 
Should you see in these qualities which render them 
unsafe companions for your children, yoair tact and 
motherly love will surely find a way to warn these 
against such associations. Only, let it be apparent 
in your whole conduct that you are solely guided by 
your sense of duty and the purest love for every child 
of yours. 

Make it also your duty to accompany your grown- 
up sons and daughters to every sort of public amuse- 
ment which you may sanction. If this precaution is 
a most necessary one in the case of your boys, it is 
indispensable in that of your girls. Oh ! if parents 
among the labouring classes only knew the irrepar- 
able ruin caused every year by their permitting their 
young sons and daughters to frequent these abomina- 



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270 THE IflfiBOB OF TEXTS WOMANHOOD. 

t 

tions called low theatres and free dances, without a 
father or a mother's eye to overlook them ! We say 
the same of " excursions/' gotten up for no matter 
what purpose : no mother should allow her daughter 
to go to such places without accompanying her, and 
no father, who fears God, and has at heart the per- 
severance of his son in piety and purity, should 
permit him to mix with such gatherings without being 
there himself to protect him. Indeed, and the most 
enlightened and experienced will support us in the 
assertion, the less the children and young people of 
the labouring classes know of such assemblages and 
amusements the better will it be for the health of 
body and souL 

A CONCLUDING ADVICE. 

We hear, on both sides of the Atlantic, of women 
of fortune founding institutions of charity, or rear- 
ing splendid churches at their sole expense. It does 
seem a noble undertaking on which to bestow one's 
fortune and one's labour, this rearing of a perfect 
temple to the worship of the most high God. But 
the formation in piety, in knowledge, in the practice 
of all goodness of a single child is, in the sight of 
God, a something far more glorious, far more meri- 
torious. Time lays low the most solid, beautiful, and 
costly structures planned by human genius, reared 
and decorated by the rarest skill ; but the soul of 
your boy is to outlive time itself, is destined to be 
happy with its Creator in eternity, when the sun 
himself will be quenched in the firmament, and the 
starry heavens folded up and cast aside like a worn- 
out garment. 



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A CONCLUDING ADVICE. 



271 



Will you labour to enrich that dear soul with 
virtues whose energies shall fail not when even fire 
shall cease to burn, and light to be needful to the 
eyeP Will you adorn it with these charities of 
earth and heaven which will form its ornament and 
its crown near the throne of God long after the last 
star will have ceased to shine in the immensities 
around us P 

Oh! what temple can be compared to your child, 
for whom Christ died, whom He purchased from hell 
with his own blood, and whom He wills you to help 
in making a godlike man ! 

For this you need no fortune, no riches, nothing 
but the love and devotion, the industry and persever- 
ance of a true woman's, a true mother's heart. 

When the poor, persecuted, but fearless prophet, 
Elias, had to fly his own country and take refuge 
among the enemies of his God and his race, he was 
bidden to go to a poor widow-woman at Sarephta, 
on the sea-coast. " When he was come to the gate 
of the city, he saw the widow-woman gathering 
sticks, . • . and said to her : Give me a little 
water in a vessel, that I may drink. And when she 
was going to fetch it, he called after her, saying : 
Bring me also, I beseech thee, a morsel of bread in 
thy hand. And she answered : As the Lord thy God 
liveth, I have no bread, but only a handful of meal 
in a pot, and a little oil in a cruse ; behold, I am 
gathering two sticks, that I may go in and dress it 
for me and my son, that we may eat it and die." * 

Surely here was poverty on the part of the mighty 

* 3 Kin 23, xvii. 



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272 THE MIBBOB OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



prophet, who could shut up the heavens for seven 
years, and the very extremity of destitution on the 
part of this generous-hearted widow. She gave to 
the man of God all she had in the world, all that 
stood between death by hunger, and her boy and 
herself ! 

God repaid her well, however ; hunger was pro- 
vided against by the prophet's miraculous power, 
and a still greater miracle rewarded both mother 
and son, for the latter was brought back by Elias 
from death to life. 

How, think you, after this wonderful providence 
over herself and her only one, ought this mother to 
have reared her boy ? In the full knowledge, the 
unbounded love, and the faithful service of the God 
of Israel. Indeed, the Jewish traditions say that 
she gave up the lad to Elias to be his servant and 
inseparable companion ever after. She is mentioned 
by our Lord in the Gospel ; her memory, and that of 
her boy shall live among men as long as the world 
itself; and in eternity they shall shine like twin 
stars among the hosts of the blessed. 

So this poor but great-souled woman made her 
son like herself, ever ready to give everything, even 
life itself, for God and the poor ! Do not say that 
you are too poor to rear godlike sons. 

Are you a wealthy or a noble mother ? Then re- 
member the widowed mother of the great St. John 
Chrysostom. She lost her husband, a general officer 
in high command in the imperial armies, when she 
was in her twentieth year. Though solicited and 
pressed to marry again, being very beautiful and 
wealthy, the noble lady resolved to give her life to 



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LET TOUR SONS BE GOD-FEARING. 273 

God and the education of her infant son. Thence- 
forward her whole time and industry were devoted 
to that divine labour of forming a man worthy of 
being a true follower of Christ. Other masters 
aided her, when early boyhood was over, to cultivate 
his mind, but the culture of that great heart was her 
work. And how beautiful was that heart, how god- 
like the life of St. John Chrysostom, the admiration 
of fourteen hundred years can attest. 

But you may think that the examples of these 
remote ages do not apply aptly to our own ; that the 
heroines of Scripture, or the heroic women of the 
early Church, are too far above the mediocrity, the 
commonplace virtue of modern times. This we do 
not admit. Soldiers in a vast camp covering many 
miles of plain and forest can see but little of what 
is passing around them, and hear only the voices of 
their immediate neighbours. Those who come after 
us will be like people looking down from a lofty 
vantage-ground on camp and battle-field, taking in 
at a glance whole armies and their positions, and 
marking the actions of the most heroic. A hundred 
years hence the names of the saintly in life will be 
brought out distinctly in the annals of God's Church 
by the action of the Spirit of Truth, who abideth 
with her evermore. And who can say how many 
heroic souls may thus shine forth resplendently from 
what seems to our near-sightedness a mass of undis- 
tinguishable mediocrity ? 

LET YOUR SONS BE GOD-FEARING AND SELF-RELIANT. 

We pause here. There is no home that our voice 
can reach in which this simple lesson may not bo 
1» 



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274 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMAWHOOD. 

thoroughly appreciated by even the most poverty- 
stricken) and taken to heart by her sons, if the 
mother will only understand aright her own best 
interests even in this world. No man is braver than 
the God-fearing man, no man has more self-respect 
and true self-reliance. Were we to succeed in 
making the sons of our labouring poor to be at once 
God-fearing and self-reliant, we should not begrudge 
devoting to the illustration of these noble qualities 
every hour of life that God may spare us, so deeply 
are we convinced that the fear of God is the strong 
foundation of all true manliness, and that one of the 
most precious attributes of Christian manhood is that 
humble self-reliance springing from the certainty of 
his ever-present grace, and the continual generous 
sense of duty. 

We resume our teaching in this chapter, by re- 
peating that if mothers will only be faithful to 
co-operate with the Holy Spirit in this great work of 
making of their sons true children of God, together 
with the natural "great qualities and admirable 
talents" bestowed on them by the Creator, the 
culture we have been detailing will be sure to result 
in producing noble Christian men and model citizens. 
Everyone who will know a son of yours brought up 
in this fashion will say of him in life and death : " I 
find in him these virtues without which all (natural) 
excellence is deformity, namely, modesty, meekness, 
tranquillity, religion, sanctity, and integrity." What 
a panegyric such praise would be both for mother 
and for son! 

No less perfect and admirable would be the women 
sent forth from every home in our midst. Let young 



'A 

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TRUTH IN ACTION. 



275 



girls take the following words as they would a nose- 
gay of rarest and sweet-scented flowers, and enjoy, 
again and again, their delicious perfume ; 

" All virtue lies in woman, and the health of the 
world. God has created nothing so good as a woman. 
No one can find a limit to the praise of women. He 
who can tell where the sunshine ends may also pro- 
claim the end of their praise. Women are pure, and 
good, and fair, they impart worthiness, and make 
men worthy. Nothing is so like the angels as their 
beautiful form, and even the mind of an angel dwells 
in woman." * 

TRUTH IK ACTION INSEPARABLE FROM THE PROFESSION 
OP TRUTH. 

To your sons and daughters alike, to such noble 
young men and women as the Church expects you to 
prepare for society, we commend these golden words 
of one of the greatest men of all time, and the 
loveliest saint of modern times : f 

"For all the estates of Savoy and France, and for 
the whole empire, I would not carry a false paper in 
my bosom. I belong to the blood of the ancient 
Gauls. What is on my tongue is precisely what 
comes from my heart. The prudence of the world 
and the artifices of the flesh belong to the children 
of the world ; but the children of God have no double 
meaning and no dissimulation.' ' 

Or again : " The spirit of chivalry " (common to all 
true Christian men and women) " is, to the highes 

* Ulrich von Lichtenstein's Fraaendienst. 
t St. Francis of Sales. 



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276 THE 1CIAB0B OP TRT7S WOMAWHOOD. 

degree, delicate and susceptible: once convince it 
that an action is base and criminal, and it wjiT- iWIni 
from it with a depth of moral feeling such as leads 
the poet in the Indian legend to represent Bin as 
something so incapable of concealment that every 
transgression is not only known to conscience, and to 
all divine spirits, but felt with a sympathetic slmdder 
by those elements themselves, which we call inani- 
mate ; by the sun, moon, fire, air, the heavens, the 
earth, the flood, and the deep, as a crying ontrage 
against nature, and a disarrangement of the uni- 
verse."* 

• Digby. 



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DUTIES OF THE MISTRESS OF THE HOME. 277 



CHAPTER. XIV. 

DUTIES OP THE MISTRESS OF THE HOME TOWARDS 
HER PARENTS AND HER SERVANTS. 

I. 

It will not, we trust, be deemed superfluous, if we 
close these chapters treating of the dignity and the 
duties of the mistress of the home as wife and 
mother, by reminding her that she stands herself in 
the relation of child to those who are her own or her 
husband's parents. Marriage among us, and by 
virtue of the laws which govern us, dissolves the tie 
of obedience which children till then owed to their 
parents. But the obligation of reverence and love 
remains through life. 

The patriarchal system, which prevailed in the 
first ages of the world, made the parental authority 
much more absolute and persistent: the married 
groups, though living outside of the patriarch's 
home, continued none the less to pay him, as long as 
he lived, not only love and reverence, but entire 
obedience. That his wife had her full share of his 
authority there is every reason to believe, though it 
was restricted to the sphere of purely domestic duties. 
There remains, however, among one of the most 
ancient races on earth — the Chinese — laws and 



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278 THE MIKBOK OF TBT7B WOMANHOOD. 

customs dating from time immemorial, which, throw 
no little light on the probable nature and extent of 
maternal authority and influence in the remotest 
historical times. 

The ancient laws of China give a father the fullest 
power over his children — all power, indeed, save that 
of life and death — and this power lasts as long as life, 
and follows the children in every position or rank 
they may occupy. The son of a peasant may become 
a mandarin, the governor of a province, a prime 
minister, a commander-in-chief ; but the son, though 
never so far in rank and social position above his 
parents, is still bound to the same rigorous obedience, 
the same duties of reverence and filial piety. 

A commander-in-chief will come down from horse- 
back, in presence of his whole army, to do homage 
to his father or mother; a magistrate will descend 
from his seat of authority as soon as he perceives his 
parent in the audience. In the imperial court the 
person most honoured and revered, by sovereign and 
courtiers alike, is the emperors mother. And this 
holds good in every family, high or low, in the king- 
dom ; the parents are the absolute sovereigns of their 
own little home-empire.* 

This universal reverence for parental authority is 
the very basis of social and domestic life, as well as 
of the political constitution of this vast empire, com- 
prising one-third of the entire human race. And 
second only to this deep-seated filial piety is the re- 
spect for old age. 

* See most instructive details in F. le Play's Ouvriers dea 
Vvm Monde*, vol. iv., p. 116. Paris, 1862. 



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DUTIES OF THE MISTRESS OF THE HOME. 279 

" Honour, as you would your own father, whoever 
is twice as old as yourself, and respect, as if he were 
your elder brother, the man who is ten years older 
than you." Such is the prescription of the Zi-kt, 
the great Chinese Bitual. Hence natives of that 
country will bestow the title of lao-yeh, "venerable 
father," on every man whom they wish to treat with 
respect. 

Again, when a man has rendered illustrious ser- 
vices to his country, or deserved in any way to be 
raised to the rank of noble, the rank is conferred on 
his parents, not on himself. " The reason is," says 
the Zi-ki, " that we easily persuade ourselves that 
the parents of a virtuous man must have been them- 
selves models of virtue." 

" The more I consider," says the Emperor Kang-hi, 
" the principles which induced the ancient emperors 
to govern the world by the sentiments of filial piety, 
the more am I convinced that they wished thereby to 
go back to the original form of government, and to 
insist on what is essential to it. Filial piety is the 
principle and the term of all virtue."* 

We have gone out of the beaten path of illus- 
tration to show how ancient, wide-spread, and 
deep-seated is this beautiful sentiment of filial 
piety, the religion of the sweetest and holiest 
gratitude. 

No mother who is true to nature but will, as age 
advances, and as her dear parents draw near the 
grave, exert herself to show them all love, honour, 
and reverence. In the last chapter we have shown 

* Quoted by Le Play, ibidem, p. 122, 



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280 



THIS MIHEOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



her how necessary it is to impress these sentiments 
on the heart of her children. Let her believe it ; 
it is her own interest we were then pleading. And 
it is her own happiness we wish to promote by what 
we say here. The young and active and energetic 
mother of to-day will be the aged, feeble, helpless 
invalid of to-morrow, to whom the loving looks and 
loving words, the heartfelt reverence and veneration 
of her dear ones, will be the sweetest of all re- 
wards. 

One can have a father and a mother bnt once : 
while they are yet with us we prize not as we ought 
the treasure their presence is to us, and we often 
allow the preoccupations and pangs of the day to 
make us overlook the duty of giving ourselves hear- 
tily to making them comfortable and happy. We 
hope to be in a better mood on the morrow. But 
that morrow never comes with the hoped-for oppor- 
tunities, and brings with the grief of their loss the 
keen regret of having neglected those who never 
neglected us. 

NEVER PUT YOURSELVES IN TOUR CHILDREN'S POWER. 

We formulate our advice this way, in order that 
all our readers may examine their consciences on 
this point. 

" Give not," says the Divine Book, " to son or 
wife, brother or friend, power over thee while thou 
livest ; and give not thy estate to another, lest thou 
repent and thou entreat for the same. As long as 
thou livest and hast breath in thee, let no man 
change (dispossess) thee For it is better that thy 



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NEVER PUT YOURSELVES, BlU. 281 



children should ask of thee, than that thou look 
towards the hands of thy children/'* 

There are but too many eloquent examples around 
us of the unwisdom of parents who heed not the 
voice of the inspired teacher; of parents who left 
native land and gave a whole life of earnest and un- 
interrupted labour to making a fortune and creating 
a comfortable home for their children, slaving and 
almost starving themselves to give them education 
and a position, and whose great heart could not 
withhold their hands from giving their dear ones 
everything with the new homes in which they saw 
them wedded and well-to-do. And how many such 
fathers and mothers have been, and are still, left to 
pine in neglect and poverty by the very children they 
loved all too unwisely ! 

" A wise son maketh a father joyful : but the fool- 
ish man despiseth his mother. Honour thy father 
in work and word, and all patience. That a bless- 
ing may come upon thee from him, and his blessing 
may remain in the latter end. The father's bless- 
ing establisheth the houses of the children : but the 
mother's curse rooteth up the foundation. Of 
what an evil fame is he that forsaketh his father ! 
And he is accursed of God that angereth his 
mother !"f 

The real practical difficulty in the way regards 
not so much, perhaps, a woman's reverence towards 
her own parents, as what is due to those of her hus- 
band. Nor does the discharge of this duty offer so 

* Bcclus. xxxiii. 20, 21, 22. 

t Ibidem, in. 



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282 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

much hardship when parents retain their own home, 
and are independent of their married children. 
Heart-burnings mainly arise when they have to look 
to these for support, and often become unbearable 
when they have to reside beneath the same roof. 

Then it is that the mistress of the household needs 
to look up to God for her motives and her rules of 
action. We put aside the case of women who are 
so unnatural and so unchristian as to forget what is 
due to their own aged parents, to their husbands, 
and the venerable persons to whom these owe their 
birth, and, it may be, the very roof which covers the 
ungrateful wife. A husband's father and mother 
become, by marriage, the wife's father and mother ; 
policy, mere worldly wisdom and practical good 
sense, in the absence of the divine law, ought to 
teach her that her peace and v her interest would be 
best secured by loving her parents-in-law. 

We suppose the mother who reads this is most 
anxious to have God's blessing, the love and respect 
of her husband and children : all this she can only 
have by showing a true and heartfelt affection for 
the persons who stand, within her home, as the re- 
presentatives of God's fatherly power and love. No 
blessing can rest upon a home where the wife and 
mother makes life a burden and the bread of life 
most bitter to the parents she is privileged to have 
near her. 

To encourage all good mothers — women true to 
the noblest instincts of nature and the most solemn 
teaching of the divine law — let us rather warm our 
hearts in the light of heroic examples, such as very 
many in all classes may behold around them daily. 



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Two young people, of excellent family both of 
them, had married, with the full approbation of the 
wife's parents, who were wealthy and much respected, 
but sorely against the will of those of the husband, 
of his mother especially. 

There was perfect equality on both sides. But the 
young man, during a tour on the continent of Europe, 
had embraced the Catholic faith, and this circum- 
stance, on his return home, had led to his intimacy 
with the family into which he married. Bitter reli- 
gious prejudice lay at the bottom of the opposition 
made by both his parents, while his mother persisted 
in saying to everyone that he had been inveigled 
into a change of religion by his beautiful bride. 
The truth was, that the young people had scarcely 
been acquainted when the change took place, and 
there certainly was then no attachment on either 
side. 

The young man was disinherited; but this cruel 
treatment did not shake either his faith or his affec- 
tion. He was further driven to hasten his nuptials 
by a cruel and scandalous report concerning the lady, 
started, too, by his own mother. Never was scandal 
so unfounded and so malignant. 

But it only injured the originators. The innocent 
child herself was kept in total ignorance of the 
rumour, and the other relatives of the gentleman's 
family vied with each other in showing their detesta- 
tion of the slander. 

The bridegroom was too high-minded to beg 
favours from his bigoted father, and too independent 
to accept from his father-in-law the handsome settle- 
ment which the latter wished to make in his favour. 



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284 TUB MIKKOK OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



He had a good and lucrative profession; he was 
himself accomplished, self-reliant, and trustful in 
God's protection ; he loved his young wife with that 
deep love of pure hearts which is deepened tenfold 
by the grace of the sacrament. And, not rashly con- 
fident of his own ability, he fixed his residence in a 
large city far away from his native place. Success 
came to him with the divine blessing, which they 
both sought so earnestly ; and year after year he 
rose higher and higher in his profession and in the 
esteem of all who knew him. His wife looked up to 
him with a sort of worship, founded on the intimate 
knowledge of his worth, of the talents and learning 
which were sanctified by a piety so enlightened and 
so simple. No home could be happier than theirs ; 
no bliss, the little wife and mother thought, could 
equal hers. She was afraid of its very excess, and 
begged our dear Lord daily to send her a cross which 
should temper the unalloyed sweetness of her lot. 
It came in his good time. 

She had been several years married, when an 
accident made her acquainted with the scandal about 
herself set afloat by her mother-in-law. Its real 
malignity, however, only dawned on her by degrees, 
and thus the terrible force of the blow was broken. 
Nevertheless it nearly crushed her ; and it required 
all her husband's tenderness and all her own piety 
and strength of soul to sustain her. She had a very 
serious illness ; for the rumour in its worst aspect 
only reached her a very short time after the birth of 
her second child. "While she was thus in serious 
danger, her husband wrote to his father informing 
hira of the critical state to which the innocent young 



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NEVER PUT YOURSELVES, ETC. 285 



wife was brought by an infamous slander originating 
with his own mother. 

The father, who had not lost all feeling for Iris son, 
and who, besides, was proud of his rising fame, was 
heart-stricken on receiving the letter. He had heard 
of the report against his daughter-in-law, but never 
fancied that the vile slander had his own wife for 
author. He for one did not and could not believe it. 
His fault lay in his bigotry, his exaggerated notions 
about a father's authority over his son's conscience, 
and in the obstinacy with which he adhered to a 
* determination once taken,. From every direction he 
had heard his daughter-in-law praised for every 
quality of mind and heart and person, for all the 
sweet virtues that can make a perfect woman, wife, 
and mother ; and more than once he felt disposed to 
relent towards his son. The letter filled him with 
equal grief and indignation. 

But his wife only met his reproof and his questions 
with haughty scorn and a fiercer denunciation of her 
son, as a most ungrateful child, and of his sick wife 
as a crafty, scheming hypocrite. Leaving his part- 
ner to the evil passions that possessed her, he 
hastened to his son's home, atoned with manly 
frankness for his own harsh conduct, embraced his 
daughter and her babes with all a father's tender- 
ness, assured the patient sufferer that no one among 
all his kinsfolk or acquaintance ever gave credit to 
the absurd report, and by his generous reparation 
recalled the sick one to health and happiness once 
more. His wife, he said, would not delay to see the 
wrong she had done and to atone for it, and thus the 
happiness of his children seemed complete. 



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But the inevitable atonement was to be made 
sooner than he anticipated, and in a way that he 
could not foresee. During his absence his house— 
the ancient home of his family — was burned to the 
ground. No one could tell how the fire began ; and 
as it was in the country, with a high wind blowing 
at the time, no effort of servants or neighbours 
availed to save the building, with its precious furni- 
ture and library. The mistress of the house was, it 
was said, herself severely injured in the confusion. 

These tidings reached her husband when half 
way on his homeward journey, and seemed to his 
conscience like a judgment on his wife's unnatural 
cruelty and his own harshness and obstinacy. No 
sooner, however, had his son and daughter-in-law 
heard of the calamity, than the latter, with the im- 
pulse of true charity, besought her husband to fly at 
once to his parents, and to bring his mother back 
with him, that she might receive from their hands 
all the tender care her misfortune and injuries 
needed. 

With what eagerness the young husband hastened 
to comply with his wife's God-inspired entreaty the 
Christian reader will easily conceive. He found his 
mother only slightly bruised, though sorely afflicted 
in spirit. The hand of God, in striking her in its 
justice, had also touched her heart in its mercy. She 
had done many acts of true charity in her life, and 
these now pleaded for her with that Wisdom which 
disposeth all our ways for its own ends. 

No mother ever received from the most tenderly 
loved child so warm a welcome as she received from 
her daughter-in-law. It was truly a merciful dis- 



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287 



pensation. Soon after the burning of his mansion, 
the sturdy old gentleman learned that the bulk of 
his fortune, invested in what had till then been a 
most prosperous venture, had been utterly swept 
away by the failure of the concern. This news 
brought on a fit of apoplexy. He lingered, half- 
paralysed, in his son's house, where the most devoted 
care of his angelio daughter-in-law, and all the com- 
forting assurances of his son, availed not to raise the 
crushed spirit. He died under the effects of a second 
stroke of the fell disease, but not till he had again 
and again prophesied to the angel who watched by 
him night and day that she would surely be blessed 
in her children. "You are more than a perfect 
woman, my love," he would say ; " you are an angel, 
and the very atmosphere of your house is heavenly." 
So he passed away, finding in death what he had not 
else known, the perfect road which leads to God, and 
that perfect peace which worlds cannot purchase. 

His widow survived him for several years. She 
was given time to expiate her sin. A cruel cancer 
in the neck tried her patience to the utmost and 
proved the generosity of the daughter she had so 
deeply wronged, and whom she had learned to love 
with a love she had never known till then. Month 
after month did that devoted one and her husband 
lavish on their parent every mark of the most untiring 
affection. The side of the house in which her apart- 
ment was had to be given up to her, so nauseating 
was the odour which the frightful sore emitted. Yet 
her room was kept like a paradise. One of the young 
wife's sisters, worthy of her in every way, volunteered 
to assist her in taking care of the sufferer. She, too, 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



felt like her husband, that this was true charity, and 
wished to die in the faith of her forefathers. She 
needed all the sublime consolations which it imparts. 
For the priest who ministered to her frequently in 
the last stage of the terrible disease often declared 
afterwards that, accustomed as he was to every form 
of human suffering, he never had beheld anything 
comparable to the appalling loathsomeness of that 
death-bed. 

And yet there the heroic son would remain with 
his parent, hour after hour, reading her some sweet 
passage from the " Imitation of Christ," a few verses 
from the history of the Passion, or reciting with the 
agonised patient some favourite form of prayer. 
There, too, the angelic forms of his wife and sister- 
in-law moved about silently, whispering from their 
pure, brave hearts such words of love and comfort as 
true women's hearts alone can find. 

"Bead me these beautiful words once more," she 
could barely say, in an almost imperceptible whisper 
to her daughter-in-law, as midnight on Good Friday 
was at hand. Her son was absent on most urgent 
business, and no one was in the sick-room but the 
devoted little wife. And she read from the " Imita- 
tion " the 21st chapter of the third book, beginning: 
" Above all things and in all things do thou, my 
soul, rest always in the Lord, for He is the eternal 
rest of the saints." When the other had read down 
to the words, " In fine, above all angels and arch- 
angels, and all the host of heaven," the dying 
woman pressed the hand held in hers. Then, as the 
other looked up, she motioned to her to continue, and 
just as the last words, " Above all that is not Thee, 



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289 



my God ! 99 she repeated thrice audibly, while a light 
seemed to overspread her features, " Thee— Thee— 
my God— my God ! 99 and expired. 

II. 

DUTIES TOWARDS SERVANTS. 

It would be a strange inconsistency if a truly 
Christian mistress, fearing God herself, and making 
his love and service the chief purpose of her life, 
should fail to be towards her servants much more of 
the mother than the mistress. 

Among God's people, before the coming of Christ, 
though the servants in the family were either slaves 
belonging to the master, or free men and women 
who had bound themselves to temporary service, the 
heads of the household were obliged not only to treat 
these dependents with humanity, but to secure to 
them all the precious benefits of the faith and hope 
in the Bedeemer. Thus, the true religion formed a 
bond of brotherhood between the inferiors and the 
superiors. Under Christianity slavery was gradually 
done away with by the very f oroe of the doctrine and 
sentiment of brotherhood working on heart and mind 
among all classes. 

The beautiful sentiment of Ecclesiasticus :— "If 
thou have a faithful servant, let him be to thee as 
thy own soul: treat him as a brother*' — sounds 
almost like some gospel precept. But this last verse 
in the chapter is preceded by several injunctions or 
practical rules concerning stubborn or vicious ser- 
vants, that a slave-master might easily pervert to his 
own purposes. 

20 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



ST. PAUL AND THE FUGITIVE SLAVE. 

Compare with this the divine charity which shines 
forth in St. Paul's Epistle to Philemon. This man, 
a citizen of Colossee, in Phrygia, and a convert to 
Christianity, had a slave called Onesimus, who fled 
from his master to Rome, after having wronged him 
in some serious manner. In the great city the fugi- 
tive came within the influence of St. Paul, then im- 
prisoned, hut who was left a certain freedom to preach 
the Gospel, and help in spreading it among all those 
who had recourse to him. Onesimus became not only a 
convert, but a most zealous and efficient assistant to 
the great apostle. For, in those days, the fortunes 
of war reduced the vanquished to bondage, and thus 
men of the noblest birth and the highest culture 
were brought down to the condition of slaves. 
Onesimus, apparently, was anxious or willing to re- 
pair the wrong he had committed towards his master ; 
at any rate, he consented to fulfil the prescriptions of 
the civil law, which compelled the return of fugitive 
slaves to their masters. 

But in the case of Onesimus, the conversion to 
Christianity of both master and slave entirely 
changed the sentiments with which each regarded 
the other, although it did not do away formally with 
the power of the former over the latter. So the 
aged Paul, from his prison, sends back Onesimus to 
Colossae, intrusting to him a letter or epistle for the 
young church springing up in that city, and another 
to Philemon, in commendation of the bearer himself : 

" Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, . . • to 
Philemon, our beloved and fellow-labourer. • . . 



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WINNING THE HEARTS OF ONE'S SEBVANTS. 291 

Though I have much confidence in Christ Jesus to 
command thee that which is to the purpose, for 
charity's sake I rather beseech, whereas thou art such 
an one, as Paul, an old man, and now a prisoner also 
of Jesus Christ : I beseech thee for my son, whom I 
have begotten in my bonds, Onesimus. . • 
Do thou receive him as my own bowels (my own 
heart). . . • Not now as a servant, but instead 
of a servant, a most dear brother, especially to me. 
... If , therefore, thou count me a partner, re- 
ceive him as myself. 11 

THE DOCTRINE OF UNIVERSAL BROTHERHOOD IN CHRIST. 

This was a language never heard before. The 
sentiments it expresses, the great doctrines of uni- 
versal brotherhood and a common calling to the in- 
heritance, with Christ, of an eternal glory, leavened 
thenceforward the hearts and minds of men, and 
changed the face of the world. In our day there 
are found men who would set aside this divine 
brotherhood and all its humanising influences, and 
bring back the reign of the darkest Pagan mate- 
rialism. Christian homes and hearts sanctified by 
all the charities which a living faith in Christ begets, 
must be the firm bulwark against this impure and 
rising tide. 

IMPERIOUS NECESSITY OF WINNING THE HEARTS OF ONE'S 
SERVANTS. 

It behoves every Christian mistress and mother, as 
she loves her own children, and labours to make 
them live up to the sublime duties of their religion. 



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292 TOT MIRROR OF TSUI WOMANHOOD. 



even so to love her servants dependent on her 
motherly charity, and looking to her, under God, for 
instruction, edification, care, and comfort in health 
and sickness. 

Later, in a separate chapter, we shall see what are 
the special duties to be fulfilled by servants them- 
selves, and the special excellence to which they can 
attain. Be it sufficient in this place to hold the 
mirror of her own duty up to the true woman, so 
that she can see in it the model of a perfect mistress, 
as we have already shown her the image of a perfect 
wife and mother. 

HOW SERVANTS SHOULD BE BOUND TO THEIR MASTERS 

'I have collected certain instructions," says an 
old author, " and composed almost an art of friend- 
ship between rich and powerful men and persons 
poor and of low condition, to whom has been applied 
the odious name of servitude. What domain is more 
fertile than domestic charity P Is it not better that 
our house should be in the charge of true friends of 
good will, rather than in that of men who evince, I 
do not say love, but not even the shadow of love P 
Such servants have only one object — to steal and get 
rich as soon as possible; but if you lift them up into 
the sphere of friendship, of free and kindly regard, 
what immense utility shall we not derive from their 
assistance ? For then they love their masters ten- 
derly, spare no pains, and expose themselves to all 
dangers for them. This friendship, if we do not 
trample humanity under our feet by our pride, . • 
will certainly spring up of itself and increase ; for 
nothing is more natural than to love those who 



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AIM HIGH IK PJEBFOBMINa YOUB DUTY. 293 

dwell under the same roof with us; and, certes, 
nothing can happen more advantageous to a man 
than to live in the same household with another 
man, when of suitable manners."* 

THE GOLDEN RULE. 

H I knew a lady, who now lives in heaven," says 
Luis de Leon ; " the persons who served her never 
left her without being prized the more for having 
lived with her. It happened once that she was 
obliged to dismiss one of her servants without having 
done him all the good that she desired, and I often 
heard her say that she was disconsolate at the 
thought of a person, once intrusted to her by God, 
departing from her house without having been bene- 
fited by the stay. 99 f 

Unquestionably, these are the ideas by which 
every head of a household ought to be governed in 
her relations with her servants. They are " intrusted 
by God " to her, that she may do them all the good 
she can, and make them in every way as good as she 
can. They are a charge committed to her, not to be 
kept in the ignorance and moral deficiencies with 
which they came to her service, but to be improved 
in every way, not merely for the sole motive of self- 
interest, as Delia Casa suggests, but because they 
are a trust for which we must be accountable to 
God. 

AIM HIGH IN PERFORMING TOUR DUTY. 

We know by our sad experience that we seldom 
succeed, when we aim high, in hitting the mark we 

• Delia Casa, " Treatise on Duties.' 1 
t Quoted by Digt>y* 



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294 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



aim at. We fail in our best and calmest resolutions 
to do exactly as well as we purposed ; indeed, it is to 
the most generous a constant source of regret and 
self-reproach that their performances fall short of 
the promises made to their own soul. 

In the performance of one's duty towards one's 
servants, then, how can one best secure a high degree 
of merit and a great amount of good done to them ? 
The first extract we gave exhorts masters and mis. 
tresses to make " friends " of their servants and de- 
pendents, because " then they love their masters ten- 
derly, spare no pains, and expose themselves to all 
dangers for them." This attachment, being based 
on a motive of self-interest, may not be either very 
lasting or very exalted. There are servants deeply 
attached to vicious masters, because the attachment 
is founded on community of enjoyments, pursuits, 
and vices. We shall secure a more exalted, per- 
manent, and purer friendship, and a more loyal and 
generous service, by following the practice of the 
noble Spanish lady mentioned by Luis de Leon — 
by considering every servant who enters our house- 
hold as a needy brother sent us by the Shepherd of 
souls, that we may receive the stranger as we would 
Christ Himself, that we may guard that soul and re- 
spect it, a3 we would the Body taken down from the 
cross and given over to our care, or the pierced 
Heart taken from out the yawning side. This is the 
model — the only practical rule to set before ourselves 
— to keep the deposit of that precious soul sent to 
us, as we would keep the sacred treasure of Christ's 
Heart. 




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PROGRESS OF SERVANTS, ETC. 295 



HOW SERVANTS WERE TREATED IN ALL CATHOLIC 

COUNTRIES. 

Nor was this religious sentiment of brotherhood 
and equality in Christ confined to the Spanish penin- 
sula ; it reigned throughout all Christian nations. 
In every princely and noble family lived a chaplain, 
whose special care and duty it was to devote himself 
to the spiritual welfare of the servants and de- 
pendents, to instruct them thoroughly in the Chris- 
tian doctrine, and to afford them every facility and 
encouragement for the reception of the sacraments, 
and the advancement in holiness of life. Ifor did 
this dispense the lord and lady from seeing to it 
in person that the chaplain did his duty, and that 
their household was one in which God, before and 
above all things, was served and honoured. The 
Sundays and feasts of obligation were duly sanctified 
by all ; and in more than one country the law of the 
Church and that of the State enjoined that, on the 
eve of these days, servants and others should be 
allowed to retire early, in order to be up in time for 
Mass the next morning. How many Catholic masters 
and mistresses sin grievously in this respect in our 
day and country ! 

MASTERS AND MISTRESSES ANXIOUS FOR THE PROGRESS OF 
THEIR SERVANTS IN HOLINESS 

More than that, in these ages of faith of which 
modern ignorance and fanaticism speak bo sneer- 
ingly, all Christian masters and mistresses were 
anxious that their entire households should have the 
very same advantages for instruction which they had 



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296 TUB MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

themselves. St. Paulinus, Archbishop of Aquileia, 
thus instructs his immediate Sovereign, Henry, Duke 
of Friuli : Entreat all who are in your house to do 
whatever they do humbly before God ; for whatever 
a man doeth with pride can never please God. In 
all their actions let them be humble ; for no one can 
come to the kingdom of God unless by humility. All 
labours, prayers, alms, fasts, and vigils, if performed 
with pride, are accounted as nothing before God. 
• • • Prescribe to all your domestics, and those 
subject to you, to abstain from pride, and to live 
temperately, justly, piously, and holily before God; 
for Christ shed his blood not alone for us clergy, but 
for the whole human race. There is no acceptation 
of persons with God ,* for the celestial palace opens 
its doors to the laity who keep the divine command- 
ments, as well as the clergy and those who bear the 
monk's habit ; for we are all one in Christ. • • . 
Love your Head with your whole heart, and the 
members of that Head. How can the hand hate the 
hand, or the foot the foot? All the members ought 
to grow up lovingly together into the perfect man."* 
This sentiment of Christian equality made masters 
and mistresses in the highest households call all their 
servants " children," and the custom still survives in 
lands where faith and piety have long since waned. 
More than that — it was held wise and proper to 
make both sons and daughters mix with the servants 
in the performance of the menial household duties. 
The heroic Bayard relates that he had to do so in his 
father's house; and Marina de Escobar says that her 

* Quoted by Digby. 



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CHARITY OF TUB MI8TRESS. 



297 



mother, although having a numerous retinue of 
servants, "used, as a prudent woman, always to 
make her daughters apply to domestio exercises, 
along with the maids.' 1 

THE CHARITY OF THE MI8TRES8 BEGETS LOVE IN THE 
SERVANTS. 

Where the old Catholic spirit, the true spirit of 
Christian charity, reigns in a household — thanks to 
a pious and zealous mistress — servants cannot fail to 
become attached to their masters, to consider them- 
selves as members of the family, having the same 
interests, affections, hopes, and fears, as they have 
the same faith, returning love for love in view of Him 
who is the Elder Brother of us all. Our ancestors 
were not fond of changing servants, precisely 
because the servants were not fond of changing 
masters. The charity which bound together the 
entire household was utterly opposed to the selfish- 
ness of our times. Our grandmothers had a saying 
which we would heartily commend to the meditation 
of their daughters and granddaughters : " The herb 
one knows, one ought to tie well to one's finger." 

An author of the early part of the last century 
cites, for the instruction of after- ages, an example of 
this mutual attachment of servants and masters. 
" What a charm," says he, when masters and ser- 
vants grow old together ! What a joy to old age, 
when it is served by ancient domestics, accustomed 
to its mode of life 1 There are families thus favoured. 
I have known no house happier in this respect than 
that of the great Siguier, Chancellor of France. All 
his servants had grown old with him ; so that if one 



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293 TUE M1UI10R OF TEUJS WOMANEOOD. 

did not always see the same faces, one saw always 
the same persons. As their constitutions were not 
so strong as his own, most of them broke down on 
the way ; and he saw them perish before himself, 
leaving but little behind them, though after forty 
years' service in the house of a chancellor. All this 
must be regarded as a part of the felicity of this 
great man, adding to the sweetness of his old age."* 

THE TIB OF CHARITY LOOSENED IK MODERN 
SOCIETY. 

Certain it is that the spectacle offered in any of 
our cities, when, in answer to an advertisement for a 
servant, hundreds of ill-clad, half-starved, and most 
uncomely-looking creatures besiege the door of the 
advertiser, and crowd the street and the sidewalk — 
was a thing unseen and unheard of a century ago, 
even in European countries, far less in this Revr 
World of ours. It is a sight which might have been 
witnessed near the great marble palace of one of our 
prince merchants twenty-four hours before this was 
written ; and it is a sad commentary on the Christian 
charity which is supposed to govern the relations of 
masters and servants in this land of fraternity and 
equality. 

How is this gulf, which selfishness and unchari- 
tableness have opened between the wealthy and the 
poor, between the class which counts masters and 
mistresses, and the poor who have to serve and to 
work, to be housed and fed and clothed, this gulf 
which unbelief and radicalism are deepening and 

* Le Bnron de Prelle, Considerations sur lea (wantages de la 
Vicilletse dans la Vie Chretienne, p. 514. Quoted by Digby. 



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*N ILLUSTRATION OP TRUE WOMEN'S INFLUENCE. 299 

widening with all their splendid theories about 
humanity and fraternity and equality, how is this 
gulf to be filled up or bridged oyer ? By the hearts 
of true Christian women ! 

AN ILLUSTRATION OF TRUE WOMEN'S INFLUENCE. 

Say not, then, what can women do ? Travellers 
over our southern seas tell us of the manner in which 
a tiny little insect, called the coral insect, prevents 
the last traces of submerged continents from disap- 
pearing for ever beneath the waves. These worlds, 
sunk beneath the ocean surface long, long ages ago, 
left visible here and there only a few of the crests of 
their highest mountains, and by degrees even these 
were worn down by wind and rain and the ceaseless 
lashing of the waves. J ust when the last summits 
had passed out of sight, God sent these armies of 
tiny creatures to labour together and build in the 
shallow waters which covered the sunken crests these 
beautiful structures called corals, with their marvel- 
lous forms and colours ; generation after generation 
of these little toilers of the deep succeeded in doing 
what all the might and ingenuity of the race of man 
could never compass — they erected structures so 
solid that the rage of the mightiest storm could 
neither destroy nor shake them. Higher and higher 
they rose, till the tide left; them bare, and other 
agencies then came to aid in making an island. 
Elsewhere existing islands are preserved from the 
destroying action of the ocean by these same little 
workers, which build their barriers or walls of coral 
all round to break the force of the waves, and save 
the islands with their inhabitants and lovely growth 
of vegetation. 



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300 TIIB MIBHOR OF TEUB WOMANHOOD. 

If God accords such, marvellous results to the united 
action of insects invisible almost to the naked eye, 
what blessings will He not bestow on mothers 
labouring within their homes to make husbands, 
children* servants, ay, and the neighbours all 
around, true children of the living God P 

Do all the good you can to the souls God gives 
you to work upon : if you are a faithful labourer, 
He will surely give you more — and this number will 
go on increasing in proportion to your goodness and 
the charity burning within. 

PRACTICAL EULB8. 

In this spirit you have only to see what are the 
simple rules taught by experience and which are to 
guide you in your conduct towards your servants. 
As in the case of your children, so here impress 
everyone in your service with the conviction that his 
or her single soul is as dear to you as if none other 
claimed your interest and your care. This personal 
interest in the welfare, the comfort, the progress of 
every individual in the household, works like a 
mighty spell. Nor, by kindly inquiring into the 
concerns of each, will their respect for you be 
diminished, if you are careful to be kind without 
being familiar. Servants like their masters to keep 
a proper distance. We have known the rudest, the 
most impertinent, and ungovernable, to be tamed 
and made respectful and well-mannered by this 
prudent mixture of kind motherly interest and 
reserve. It is necessary always to address one's 
servants with a simplicity which is far removed from 



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EN COURAGE THEM TO SEEK YOUB ADVICE, ETC. 301 

a proud, imperious tone, but implies a certain degree 
of regard for them ; and still more necessary that 
they should never be permitted to address their 
master or mistress, or any member of the family, 
otherwise than respectfully. 

Persons really well bred will never permit them- 
selves either rudeness, haughtiness, or familiarity 
towards their dependents ; and it very rarely happens 
that these show themselves disposed to be otherwise 
than respectful towards such masters. 

We repeat it, then, take a real interest in eaohone 
of your servants. 

ENCOURAGE THEM TO SEEK YOUR ADVICE IN 
DIFFICULTIES. 

Eemember how little of present joy or happiness 
such persons have outside of what your home affords 
them. They have had, very many of them, a hard 
lot in the past ; their stay with you may decide of 
their whole future ; they are all gifted with some 
share of affection, some of them, at least, with warm 
and deep affections ; among these hearts there may 
be one that is sorely bruised, and which your 
motherly hand can soothe and heaL Your own 
womanly tact will not be slow in discovering such as 
need especial kindness, nay, very great delicacy of 
treatment. Let them be encouraged to come to you ; 
and let them feel that their secret, whatever it be, is 
safe with you. 

It not unfrequently happens that a certain moodi- 
ness or irritability which you perceive in servants 
otherwise excellent, arises from concealed grief. 
There may be a fearful struggle going on against 



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302 THE MIRR0& G/ '^RUE WOMANHOOD. 

despair beneath that veil of sadness or that cloud of 
ill-temper. A single kind word from you — a word 
from your heart — will make these clouds dissolve in 
tears of sweet relief, and the whole soul will be laid 
bare before you. 

DO NOT JUDGE THEM HASTILY. 

Even where there is neglect of duty, be not hasty 
in condemning or punishing. You will, if still 
young, find out before you die that the harshest 
and most pitiless of mistresses, the quickest to think 
ill of the delinquent, to judge severely, and punish 
without mercy, is the woman who is most remiss in 
the fulfilment of her own sacred duties, and who 
stands most in need of the mercy of God and man. 

When complaints are made, do not lend a willing 
ear, so as to encourage informers, nor hasten to act 
upon the information. Let all under you know that 
you never condemn before inquiring carefully, and 
that your inquiry is always conducted without noise 
or partiality. 

SURROUND YOUR SERVANTS WITH OBJECT8 WHICH CAN 
ELEVATE THEM. 

The feeling of inferiority and dependence, and the 
nature of the services they render, are, in themselves, 
sufficient to humble persons who may be naturally 
proud, high-minded, or sensitive. Do not debase or 
degrade your servants still further by allotting them 
rooms to work and sleep in where all is discomfort 
and meanness. Our forefathers were wont, when 
the beggar asked for a night's lodging, to give him, 
in the name of Christ, a place at the common board, 
a seat near the warm hearth, and a clean and com- 



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DO ?:OT OVERBURDEN TIIEM "WITH WORK. SOo 

fortable bed — all for his dear sake who for us 

came unto his own, and his own received him not." 

"We have just seen that the servant in the Chris- 
tian household is to be treated as a something holy 
and precious ; do not, theii, while you give warmth 
and comfort to the passing beggar, and while you 
lavish luxury and all honour on a guest, leave the 
servant who labours for your interest and who is one 
of your family, to what is as inhospitable as the 
cavern of Bethlehem, as cold and as comfortless and 
as unclean almost. For there are mistresses who 
care not how wretchedly furnished may be the 
miserable garret or cellar in which their servants 
pass the night, after a hard day's toil. 

See you not that the very necessity of aocepting 
such a resting-place is felt as a degradation P And 
everything which degrades is remembered as an un- 
pardonable wrong. Let everything in their sleeping 
and working-rooms tend to elevate them ; let there 
be both cleanliness and comfort ; and let the walls 
be ornamented with such pictures and other simple 
decorations as may lift mind and heart above the 
sights and sounds of the street. 

Insist on it that their food shall be wholesome 
and abundant, and that everything about the meal 
shall bespeak a motherly care for their health. 

DO NOT OVERBURDEN THEM WITH WORK. 

J ust as persons who have no conscience are harsh 
nnd merciless in dealing with the weaknesses and 
faults of others, even so do persons who have 
never known what it is to work hard, or work at all, 
show themselves pitiless or most unreasonable in the 



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amount of labour they expect and exact from their 
servants. There are, unhappily, but too many 
masters and mistresses in all large communities, 
who have more than one trait of resemblance to 
Sampson and Sarah Brass. Such abominable mean- 
ness and hard-heartedness are not, however, consis- 
tent with any one Christian virtue in man or woman. 
Still there is in many households a carelessness and 
callousness as to the hardships, the diet, and comfort 
of servants, that result in like suffering to these, and 
create the same bitter hatred in the sufferers, and 
call down from a just God the same inevitable 
retribution. 

Where servants are loved and cared for, they work 
lovingly and conscientiously for their masters, and 
repay with ample interest the generosity shown by 
these in providing for the health and comfort of their 
dependents. 

IN SICKNESS CARE FOR THEM TENDERLY. 

Do not send them out of the house when they are 
ill, unless the disease be a contagious one, and you 
have near at hand an hospital in which they are sure 
to be well cared for. 

When the sickness has been contracted in serving 
you faithfully, this care on your part is simply an 
act of justice. In every case it is a duty imposed by 
charity; and where the soul of the sufferer needs 
more t< nder nursing than even the body, it is far 
more urgent that you should not give over to others 
the duty God wishes you to fulfil in person. 

During many years of ministration to the sick we 
have had occasion to witness the unsparing devotion 



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nr sickness care for them tenderly. 805 

of many mistresses to their sick servants. One in- 
stance, that of a generous Protestant lady, did not 
fall under our own observation, but was related to 
us by an eye witness. She was the most distin- 
guished personage in her native city, and her ex- 
ample may serve as an exhortation to many tepid 
and remiss Catholics. 

One of her servants fell ill of a most malignant 
fever ; the nature of the disease and the imminent 
danger to her large family were clearly pointed out 
by the physician. The lady, however, had no 
thought of sending the poor patient away ; but made 
an hospital of one-half of her large mansion, iso- 
lating it as far as she could from the rest of the 
household, and shut herself up with the sufferer, an 
Irish Catholic girl. She would permit no one but 
the physician and the priest to enter, all that was 
needful to herself and her patient being left outside 
the apartment adjoining the sick-room. Night and day 
the courageous woman watched over her charge; but it 
was all in vain. The terrible fever claimed its victim. 

The generous mistress bestowed on the dead the 
same loving care she had lavished on the living. 
She dressed the corpse in her own raiment, gave 
orders to have everything done as if the deceased 
were one of her daughters, had the body in its 
beautiful rosewood casket laid out in her best par- 
lour, and invited all the friends and co-religionists 
of the dead girl to pay their respects to her remains. 
The funeral was a touching demonstration, attesting 
by the numbers of those present and by their quality 
that all appreciated this noble example of Christian 
charity. 

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Her daughters and granddaughters inherited to- 
. gether with this self-sacrificing spirit their parent's 
claim to a still higher grace. 

"We have quoted in the first part of this chapter 
the beautiful charity of two sisters to the woman 
who had wronged them so fearfully : and elsewhere* 
we glanced rapidly at the death-bed of a young 
martyr of charity. We have seen, in families blessed 
with parents who deemed the tender care of sick 
servants an ordinary but most sacred duty, what 
mother and children can do to make a sick-room de- 
lightful. There was no thought of expense, or 
fatigue, or fastidiousness. The best physicians in 
the city were in attendance, the most costly articles 
from the druggist, the grocer, or the market, the 
most generous wines when needed ; and what was 
more than all that, a love and untiring care, inspired 
by true religion, was lavished on the patient even 
though he or she had only been a few days in the 

family. # 

Could it be a matter of surprise that servants living 
in such a house never could speak of their master or 
mistress but with tears of gratitude and expressions 
of heartfelt veneration ? 

KNOW HOW TO PRAISE YOUR SERVANTS. 

This is only the application to your dependents of 
the rule given with respect to your husband and your 
children. It is a serious defect in a mistress not to 
know when and where and how to praise her ser- 
vants. Praise, however, is a sweet reward, and most 

♦ Page 147. 



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KNOW HOW TO PRAISE YOT7R SERVANTS. 



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coveted, too, by those who labour conscientiously — a 
reward often more prized by affectionate and gene- 
rous natures than the miserable compensation called 
wages ; and it is a most powerful stimulant to the 
sluggish, the careless, and even the perverse. What 
transformations have we not seen in school-room and 
kitchen, and workshop and field, effected in natures 
hitherto rebellious to all stimulants, by the gentle 
words of praise bestowed by a wise master or a kind 
mistress ! 

"We once more remind you that the judicious and 
generous bestowal of praise is a most beneficial and 
meritorious alms-giving. It is more than gold or 
silver to the receiver, and it never impoverishes the 
giver. Do not stint those who thirst for it. It will 
be more welcome to many a famished heart than a 
draught from the cofll spring to foot -sore and faint- 
ing wayfarer. It will inspire good resolutions and 
give strength to execute them. It will be like the 
first steps of that divine ladder which the Patriarch 
saw reaching from earth to heaven ; your kind words 
will raise the weak soul up one step, or two or 
three, thereby showing it that the ascent to higher 
goodness and virtue is not only possible but sweet. 
God's angels then will do the rest ; and the God of 
angels from on high will look down and bless you 
for the help you have given to the faint-hearted. 



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CHAPTER XV, 

THE IDEAL HOME. 

Whew wife and husband are what God wills them to 
be, one mind and one heart, having but one purpose 
in life — to be devoted to each other, walking hand-in- 
hand in the divine presence, seeking to know the 
divine will clearly in all things, and yearning to 
accomplish it perfectly, then their home cannot fail 
to be an ideal or perfect home, and their united work 
in life a perfect work ; because it is as much God's 
work as their own. 

In such a home, when all the ordinances left by 
Christ to his Church have sanctified it as well as the 
hearts of its master and mistress, the wife is most 
truly the embodiment of all natural and supernatural 
excellence designed to keep her companion faithful 
to God and the Truth.* "We again recall the atten- 
tion of all mothers to the exceeding care and reverence 
with which they should prepare their sons and 
daughters for the reception of the (to them) all-im- 
portant sacrament of matrimony. In the world-wide 

• Truth is defined by De Bonald as " the knowledge of beings 
and their relations." This is truth in our mind ; but truth in 
our life, or truth in action, would be the fulfilment of all the 
duties imposed on us towards all beings — God, ourselves, and 
the neighbour. 



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THE idea! BOMB. 809 

warfare mad© at present on Hie Church and her most 
sacred institutions, not the least mischief is don$ by 
making of marriage a mere civil contract and lay 
ceremony. As we believe firmly in the perpetual 
union of Christ with his spouse the Church, so let us 
be faithful and fervent in profiting by these divine 
ordinances designed to hallow our homes, our hearts, 
our lives. 

In treating of the qualities and virtues of a true 
wife, we did little more than point briefly to the fact 
of so many husbands being saved from ruin, temporal 
and eternal, by her agency who is the angel of the 
home. Presently we shall see how hard it is to 
achieve the redemption from inveterate vice of a soul 
so dear. But there stands the mighty lesson in all 
its divine meaning, that just as Mary the Mother 
of the New Life gave the Saviour and salvation to 
the world, just as the Church, the spouse of Christ, 
evermore performs the divine office of motherhood 
here below towards the nations, even so true woman 
in every home is the saviour and sanctifier of man. 

Hence the mighty import of the duties assumed by 
the teaching orders of women in the modern world. 
Their schools are not merely a nursery from which 
their own numbers are recruited, but they are the 
nursery of the true Christian mothers who are to rear 
the priests as well as the citizens of the future. 

Where husband and wife are united by the deepest 
of all natural affections — deepened still more, puri- 
fied, and intensified by the great gift of the special 
sacramental grace — they set before themselves, like 
Christ and his Church, one mighty work to do, to 
make their home a paradise and their children saints. 



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And when we say " saints " we mean true men and 
true women, faithful, perfect, admirable in every 
possible relation of life. 

Let every one of you, wives and mothers, who read 
these lines, pause here and say, whether or not she 
has seen such homes among the poorest day-labourers, 
among tradesmen and merchants, among the wealthy 
and the nobly born ? Where there is living faith in 
the twin souls knit together by the sacrament, and 
that most blessed union of minds and hearts and 
wills, even poverty is sweet and hard toil is welcome, 
and husband and wife find in each other, every day 
that dawns on them, new qualities which delight and 
new virtues to increase their mutual love : each is to 
the other a continual exhortation to trust in God, to 
piety and uprightness, to the patience and energy 
which bear with unavoidable ills and aim at the pos- 
session of true good. There is happiness with a dry 
loaf, a warm fire, and the love which enables each to 
be all-in-all to the other ; and there is wealth above 
all price in the contentment based on this mutual 
tenderness and on the all- sufficiency of the devoted 
husband to the wife, and of the devoted wife to her 
husband. 

The home of the poorest man where such love is, 
and such goodness is known to all around, is most 
truly like a bright light in a dark place. 

But where this union of hearts exists in the home 
of the wealthy and the great, the life-labour of hus- 
band and wife can be productive of incalculable good. 
Such people, with their ample means, their position, 
and their influence are, in truth, God's stewards in 
high places, with an arduous mission before them ; 



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THE IDEAL HOME AN HEREDITARY HOME. 31 J 

but who can describe the reward kept in store for 
their fidelity P 

AIM AT MAKING THE IDEAL HOME AN HEREDITARY 
HOME. 

This is the last suggestion which we make to those 
who have succeeded in rising to affluence. In the 
days of our forefathers it was the ambition of every 
high-souled man, whether born in poverty or in a 
palace, to create a home for himself and his children 
after him, or to preserve and adorn the home of his 
parents. 

To 'every father and mother whom our voice can 
reach, we say: Make your home so happy, so 
honoured, so hospitable, and so substantial that your 
children shall vie with each other as to who can 
possess it, keep it, and transmit it more honoured still 
and more substantial to their dearest. Love to have 
your married children settle near you ; encourage and 
help them to build homes like your own. Give them 
to understand, by your advice and example, that the 
fortune which they may make in their turn is not to 
be spent by the possessor in mere personal enjoyment, 
but laid up for his children and the poor and God's 
Church, in their need. 

" This small inheritance my father left me 
Contenteth me, and is worth a monarchy, 
I seek not to wax great by others' waning, 
Or gather wealth, I care not with what envy ; 
Sufficeth that I have maintains my state, 
And sends the poor well pleased from my gate."* 

This spirit is not that which animates in our day 

* Shakespeare, " Henry VI., part ii., act iv., scenes? 



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nations and individuals. The universal tendenoy is 
to make the most of the present, and to let those who 
come after us take care of themselves. Families in 
the olden time, even those of farmers and tradesmen, 
were most ambitious to leave a home and a name 
after them, the home and the name they had re- 
ceived from their fathers. Men of all classes 
resembled the banian or sacred tree of India, which 
sends down from its lower branches air-roots into the 
earth. These in their turn grow up to be strong 
props, supporting the horizontal branches and re- 
maining connected with the parent trunk. Thus does 
the latter multiply itself till it covers many an acre 
of land, and affords shelter to thousands. 

But fathers among us care little about founding 
a house; nor do their sons preserve any lasting 
affection for the home in which they were born. 
Families nowadays resemble the solitary trees left 
behind by the settler when axe and fire have 
swept away the forest from around his abode. They 
pine alone, graceful and stately it may be, amid 
the waste, but they leave no descendants behind 
them. 

" There is nothing more expensive and injurious," 
says a wise author, " than changing one's residence. 
Things are lost and broken. It has an influence even 
on the mind; ideas are discomposed and troubled, 
and some time must elapse before they resume their 
wonted order. I wish that all who are mine should 
lodge under the same roof, warm themselves at the 
same hearth, and sit at the same table. The united 
family obtains more consideration than if it was dis- 
persed. If divided and less numerous, it will never 



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OBSTACLES TO THE WIFE'S GOOD GOVERNMENT. 813 

arrive at the same esteem, authority, and import- 
ance." * 

Let fathers and mothers forgive these earnest 
wishes we form for seeing their homes ideal homes, 
most blessed homes ; for seeing them also substantial 
and permanent homes, not like tents set up for the 
night and struck with the next dawn, but homes that 
will continue to be loved and revered by many a 
generation of noble Christian men and women, to 
whom every stone shall "represent the ancient 
honour and venerated virtue of the family," and the 
dwelling itself shall be "the heart of loyalty and the 
sanctuary of honour/ ' 

Such it can and will be with the cordial co-opera- 
tion of a husband possessed of manly spirit, devotion 
to his wife, and a conscientious desire of fulfilling the 
divine will. Fathers, whoever you are, let it be your 
purpose to make your home such that every son of 
yours in passing it would uncover his head and 
almost bend his knee, as if it were the temple of the 
living God, and honoured with the presence of his 
veiled majesty, f 

OBSTACLES TO THE WIFE'S GOOD GOVEBNMBNT. 

If the home is what it ought to be, what God in- 
tends it should be, its mistress and sovereign is so 
not only by the nature of things, but by the supre- 
macy of her own goodness, and the free and loving 
homage of her husband. He is to be, throughout 

• Angelo Pandolfini, Governo delta Famiglia. 

f " Groenveld on his way to execution, when passing by his 
father's house, bent his knees, looking towards it, and then 
courageously met his death. Digby. 



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his whole life, the first servant of her he has made 
queen over his household and his heart. 

What happens, when, instead of this loving service 
done to his wife, instead of being her willing and 
docile instrument in furthering the happiness of all 
subject to them, instead of co-operating with her in 
the divine work of educating and elevating both 
children and servants, he becomes her chief ob- 
stacle, the ever-present and insuperable difficulty 
which no one can remove from her path ? 

We do not wish to cast a shadow on the spirit of 
the reader by dwelling for one moment on the ex- 
treme cases — alas ! all too frequent among us—of 
habitual intemperance, or unfaithfulness in husbands, 
bound by the obligations inherent to their state to be 
models of virtue and the guardians of the sacred 
honour of their homes. 

The wife whose heart is not broken, whose life is 
not shortened, and whose spirit is not utterly pros- 
trated on discovering her companion to be the slave 
of intemperance, his affections to be given to another, 
or his soul to be a loathsome moral ulcer, must be 
sustained by the hand of God. We have shown one 
example of such a sad lot in a preceding chapter ; * but 
how many young wives possess the angelic piety and 
heroic fortitude of Portugal's most lovely flower of 
sanctity? 

There are some, however ; — there are, we doubt, 
many more than we suspect. God knows how to 
feed the springs of nobleness and spiritual life in the 
souls most dear to Him, in those especially who seek 

* Chapter VII., pp. 106 and following. 



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to make of their cross their crown." In the very 
homes where the druDkard's beastly life would seem 
to kill every germ of happiness in the hearts of wife 
and children, and to blight every promise and pro- 
spect of future prosperity, faith and love will continue 
to live within the soul of a gentle woman, and hope 
to survive all the crushing disappointments of the 
past. 

In the frightful cold of the highest latitudes ever 
yet reached by man, even beneath the ice and the 
snow which the sun of last year and many preceding 
suns had failed to melt, our heroic travellers have 
discovered, on digging deep to the soil, the beautiful 
heath called Andromeda, still living and awaiting a 
future spring. The hardy little thing has its own 
internal heat, and thaws the first soft snow which 
covers it, forming thus a kind of dome or roof of ice 
above itself ; and there it lives on secure, with the 
buds of its pretty flowers in their sheaths, ready to 
expand when the long winter is over, and the first 
rays of sunshine fall upon its bed. 

And are not immortal souls more a care to the 
Father of all than the heath flower of the extreme 
north, or the queenliest blossom that blows among 
the wild luxuriance of the Brazilian forest? So 
brave hearts, in your desolated homes, over which 
have settled the darkness and the cold of more than 
the longest arctic winter, be sure that God the life- 
giver is with you, and that his warmth, who is the 
sun of all comfort, will visit you in good season. 

OBSTACLES IN THE WEALTHY HOME. 

Apart from the extreme case of habitual intem- 
perance, and such destroying vices as we have just 



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mentioned, the wealthy wife may have to contend 
with other difficulties. Her husband, though neither 
dissipated nor intemperate, may be entirely out of 
sympathy with her best and most cherished designs 
for the education of her children and the government 
of her household, as well as for all her most legiti- 
mate works of outdoor charity and zeal. Thus, 
especially in the great labour of educating her chil- 
dren, there will be a want of sympathy in what a true 
woman holds to be most dear and sacred. It is a 
sad trial. 

But if most women are discourged by this lack of 
sympathy, or of efficient co-operation on the part of 
their husbands, there are others, and they are not so 
very rare, who have derived fresh oourage and energy 
from their husbands' apathy, doubling their efforts 
to secure to their dear ones the highest culture of 
mind and heart, and employing a God-inspired in- 
dustry and perseverance to interest the father in the 
intellectual and spiritual advancement of his children. 

A woman of genuine piety will, like St. Monica, 
know what virtue there is in fervent prayer and tears 
poured out before the divine majesty in favour. of the 
callous soul. As in the case of Augustine, so in 
the case of the worst husbands, we should say to the 
mourner, w It is impossible that the son of such tear- 
ful prayers should perish ! " But there are other 
remedies which God wonderfully blesses. Not only 
must you make your children pray with you and tell 
them that they are praying for their parent; you 
should also stimulate them in their studies and their 
progress in all goodness by the thought of thereby 
making their father happy. 



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Get up in his honour little family festivals, with 
recitations, music, and other like amusements ; inte- 
rest the entire household in these entertainments, 
with such of his friends as he would wish to see 
pleased. It is rare that the most indifferent and un- 
sympathetio remains uninterested or unmoved by such 
exhibitions as these. We merely suggest. We have 
seen the experiment succeed so marvellously that we 
deem it worth while to counsel a renewal of it. 

There is worse than want of sympathy, however, 
there is interference with the mother's plans and 
methods in rearing her children, or in caring for the 
instruction and comfort of her servants. This is a 
great hardship. But what is to be done ? 

Not to lose heart ; to do as much of one's duty as 
circumstances permit; to go on from day to day 
giving to the young plants under one's care as much 
attention and culture as is possible, and to trust in 
the divine assistance for a change, sooner or later. 

Besides, does not the homely truth of the old 
favourite ballad, " Love will find out the way," apply 
to such cases as this most unreasonable opposition 
from one's husband ? Will not the love which sur- 
vives in a true woman's heart for the man she once 
loved best of all the world, prompt some one way to 
bring him to her way of thinking ? And even should 
that wifely love be dead, dead, will not the mother's 
love "find out the way" of overcoming the ob- 
stacle ? Again we remind mothers so circumstanced 
that He whose work they are trying to do binds him- 
self to aid them, and will surely lend his assistance to 
their strenuous and persevering efforts. Monica con- 
verted her pagan husband, as well as his mother ; it 



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818 THE MIRROR 07 TRT71 WOMANHOOD. 



was a hard struggle with a weak soul utterly steeped 
in heathen vices and self-indulgence ; and she ended 
by winning her son to God — a still harder conquest ; 
for in the case of Augustine there was the pride of 
intellect to overcome as well as the terrible power of 
human respect and a life of more refined indulgence 
asyet in its prime. 

How can you tell what your children may be in 
God's designs ? 

In this case, of Augustine's father, Patricius, we 
have touched upon the terrible obstacle offered to 
the mother's teaching and moral training by the evil 
examples of a father. "We cannot do better than re- 
commend, to mothers circumstanced as Monica was, 
he lesson of her life and examples. Let us listen to 
one page of Augustine's " Confessions, " * as if we 
paused for a few minutes on a toilsome and steep 
path, to look down on a lovely vale, and breathe 
doliciously the mingled fragrance borne upwards to 
us by the summer air : 

" Being modestly and soberly trained, and rather 
made subject by Thee to her parents, than by her 
parents to Thee, when she had arrived at a marriage- 
able age she was given a husband whom she served 
as her lord. And she busied herself to gain him to 
Thee, preaching Thee unto him by her behaviour ; 
by which Thou madest her fair, and reverently 
amiable, and admirable unto her husband. . 
For she waited for thy mercy upon him that by be- 
lieving in Thee he might become chaste. And 
besides this, as he was earnest in friendship, so was 




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OBSTACLES TN THE WEALTHY HOME. 319 



he violent in anger ; but she had learned that an 
angry husband should not be resisted, neither in 
deed nor even in word. But so soon as he was 
grown calm, she would give him a reason for her 
conduct should he have been excited without cause. 

" In short, while many matrons whose husbands 
were more gentle, carried the marks of blows on 
their dishonoured faces, and would, in private con- 
versation, blame the lives of their husbands, she 
would blame their tongues. . . . And when 
they, knowing what a furious husband she had to 
endure, marvelled that it had never been reported, 
nor appeared by any indication, that Patricius had 
beaten his wife, or that there had been any domestic 
strife between them, even for a day, and asked her 
in confidence the reason of this, she taught them her 
rule, which I have mentioned above. They who 
observed it experienced the wisdom of it, and re- 
joiced; those who observed it not were kept in 
subjection, and suffered. . . . Such a one was 
she, Thou, her most intimate instructor, teaching her 
in the school of her heart. . . . She was also 
the servant of thy servants. Whosoever of them 
knew her, did in her much magnify, honour, and love 
Thee ; for that through the testimony of the fruits of 
a holy conversation (life), they perceived Thee to be 
present in her heart ; for she had 1 been the wife of 
one man,' had requited her parents, had guided her 
house piously, had brought up children, bringing 
them forth anew as often as she saw them swerving 
from Thee. Lastly, to all of us, 0 Lord, . . . 
who, before she slept in Thee, lived associated 
together, having received the grace of thy baptism, 



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did slie devote oare such as she might, if she had 
been the mother of us all, served us as if she had 
been child of all." 

Wives and mothers who bear the double cross laid 
on Monica, must imitate her faithfully, remembering, 
each of them, that she, too, has in the Spirit ever 
dwelling in a faithful soul " a most intimate In- 
structor, teaching her in the school of her heart." 

Go not abroad to neighbours, or even dearest 
friend, to tell the story of your grievances against 
your husband, but follow the promptings of that 
Divine Teacher within, bidding you suffer, be patient, 
pray, labour, and wait, doing meanwhile quietly 
among the poor all the good you can, that they also 
may lift up their hands in prayer for you. 

OBSTACLES IN THE POOR HOME. 

Whatever hardship a wealthy mother may find in 
doing a true woman's work within her home, she 
has not the fear of poverty or starvation to contend 
with. That is the fearful lot of the poor woman 
cursed with an intemperate or idle husband, or bur- 
dened with an inefficient or infirm one. 

Where intemperance consumes in the home all the 
fruits of a husband's labour, or where idleness sits 
at the scanty board, and e*»ts up the bread which the 
wife's hard toil has to earn for her dear ones and 
herself, how heavy the heart must grow with the 
care of the morrow ! How weak the hands must feel 
in doing the work which cannot keep fire enough on 
the hearth, or bread enough on the board! And 
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OBSTACLES IN THE POOR HOME. 321 

poorly fed, and too barely clad to be sent to school ? 
And if the overtaxed mother should find heart and 
leisure to instruct the little ones that multiply and 
grow up around her cheerless hearthstone, even 
should her own examples be most angelic, can they 
be efficacious to counteract the words, the deeds, the 
profane and blasphemous language, the violent and 
brutal conduct of a father who is either always in- 
toxicated, or always suffering from the irritability 
and half-frenzy consequent upon habitual intoxi- 
cation ? 

Oh! if there were religious orders of men and 
women whose exclusive vocation it would be to go to 
the succour of such mothers as these — and they are so 
numerous ! they would yearly save millions, who are 
willing to be saved, but who must be lost without 
some interference of heaven-sent charity. 

Of all the most deserving — so often the most 
heroic — members of their flocks, none more than 
these mothers appeal to the priestly zeal of our 
devoted pastors. Our voice can scarcely reach these 
brave souls fainting on the road beneath their in- 
tolerable burden, or it can only come to them through 
the generous hearts this page may move with pity 
for Christ's dearest ones. May He speak to every 
one of you, and impel you to aid where to aid is the 
divinest mercy ! 



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OHAPTEE XVI. 

THE MISTRESS OF THE HOME AND HER SOCIAL DUTIES. 

The words " society 99 and " social duties," as they 
are to be understood here, have received, from the 
real follies and criminal vanities of worldly-minded 
women, an odious meaning, which must be at once 
corrected ere we can enter on an explanation of the 
noble part which a Christian woman has to play in 
the social circle to which she is born, and to which 
she is bound by so many duties and charities. 

The word " society/' as understood by the world 
of fashion and vanity, means simply assemblages of 
the wealthy, the worldly, and the dissipated, into 
which women go to be admired and sought after ; 
where the great purpose of life is to display one's 
self to the best advantage, to outshine one's neigh- 
bours, and to decry them by a thousand arts. 
Women who have never gone into such society but 
to shine in this way, and who rear their daughters 
with the same notions of social life, and introduce 
them to " Vanity Fair " for the same purpose of 
dazzling and outstripping all competitors in the race 
of extravagance, will teach their children, as they 
have taught themselves, that their sole duty in life is 
so to dress and to charm in these gatherings that 
they shall become resistless. These are the persons 



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THE MISTRESS OF THE HOME. 



823 



who have given an odious and almost criminal sense 
to the terms " society " and " social duties." 

And not without great reason. For such women, 
there is no true home, with its sacred duties and God- 
like virtues, with its serious labour of self- culture 
and spiritual advancement, followed by the sweet 
repose and delightful amusements of the family 
circle. There is no home-life for these votaries of 
vanity. Home for them only means the retirement 
in which they rest between one round of dissipation 
and another, and in which, when they have slept a 
part of their weariness away, they wearily prepare 
for the next social meeting. The husbands of such 
women are only looked up to as the prime ministers 
of their pleasures, as a happy convenience for pro- 
riding the moneys necessary to their unlimited 
extravagance. 

The care and regulation of a household, the educa- 
tion of children, when they elect to be burdened with 
any, the improvement or comfort of their servants, or 
the needs of the poor who knock at their gate, are to 
these weary ones an intolerable nuisance. Vanity — 
Self, rather, under another name — is the only deity 
these heartless ones worship, and pleasure is the sole 
end of their miserable existence. But let them view 
the deformity of their own lives, and the certain ruin 
of body and soul towards which they are hurrying, 
by the contrast presented by the life of a true 
Christian woman of the world, by her notions 
about society and social duty, and her conscientious 
discharge of the obligations imposed by her 
position* 



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324 



THl 1HER0B 07 TETJB "WOMANHOOD. 



THE " WOMAN OP THE WORLD " AND THE " WORLDLY 
WOMAN." 

Truth is like the broad light of day, in which the 
eye sees the reality of things. In that light let us 
behold what is the difference between a woman of 
the world, in the fair and obvious sense of the words, 
that is, a true Christian woman living in the world, 
discharging faithfully every known duty, and a 
"worldly woman" who lives for self, for human 
opinion, and mere enjoyment. We have already 
seen the dark side of the picture, let us now see the 
bright 

Most women have to live in the world. It is the 
sphere of their labours, often heroic, beneficial to 
everybody around them, and glorious to God and his 
Church. St. Monica lived all her life in the world, 
and discharged most admirably all the duties of 
daughter, wife, mother, mistress of a household, a 
member of the sorely-tried Church in her day, and 
of the more than half pagan society around her. So 
was it with many others of her contemporaries in the 
East and West : St. Macrina, the grandmother of St. 
Basil the Great, and St. Emmelia, his mother, were 
women of the world, living together in the same 
house, and together labouring to rear the sons of the 
latter, three of whom have been revered as saints by 
all succeeding Christian ages. Near them, in their 
native province, lived another family of saints, that 
of St. Nonna, the mother of St. Gregory Nazianzen, 
who also converted and made a saint of her husband. 
Nor were such women and their families by any 
means so rare as one might be led to think. In 



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c' 

THB WORLDLY WOMAN* 



825 



Africa, we have at the same time the glorious de- 
fender of Catholic doctrine, St. Athanasius, whose 
mother declared that " it was her intention to devote 
her life to making of this, her only child, a true ser- 
vant of the Church." She alone educated him, 
trained him in learning and goodness, till she made of 
him the wonder of his age. Under this most wise 
and loving guide the boy became an apostle, even 
before he had ceased to be a boy. For even then 
he was wont to assemble the pagan children of his 
own age, in his home or in the street, instructing 
them in the Christian faith, and when he had given 
them the desire of being baptised, baptising them 
with his own hand. 

And this man, become the bishop of his native 
city, Alexandria, having experienced the powerful 
influence of a true Christian woman in his own early 
formation, employed the Christian women of his 
church as the most zealous apostles of the truth, and 
the most eloquent denouncers of Arianism. 

We have already mentioned Anthusa, the illustri- 
ous mother of St. John Ohrysostom, who lived and 
died a woman of the world, without ceasing to be a 
model of virtue. History has also preserved the 
names of many of the saintly women who helped J ohn, 
when raised to the perilous episcopal chair of Con- 
stantinople, to combat the vices of the court, to stem 
the torrent of extravagance, luxury, and corruption 
which swept over the new capital and the surround- 
ing provinces. At the head of these virtuous and 
most noble ladies stands St. Olympias, and among 
them may be mentioned St. Pentalia, St. Sylvia, 
Percuta, Sabiniana, Bassiana, Ohalcidia, Asyncritia, 



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326 xsa MIKBOB OF trite womahhood. 



and St Nicareda, of the highest nobility of Nicome- 
dia, the mother of the sick and the poor, who lived 
and died in her own house, shedding around her on 
every side the hallowing influences of her spotless 
life, and her most generous charities. 

In the West, Italy offered a like spectacle of 
womanly holiness and zeal. Borne beheld the great 
St. Jerome literally enlisting the patrician ladies into 
the service of the poor and the infirm, or into the 
ranks of the monastic life. One has only to remem- 
ber such names as St. Paula, and her daughter, St. 
Eustochium, and forthwith a galaxy of glorious 
Christian women arise before the mind's eye, who 
made of the Borne of the fourth century the worthy 
parent of the Christian Borne of the nineteenth, 
before it became the prey of Piedmontese infidelity 
and unblushing corruption. 

Further to the west and the north we meet with 
St. Ambrose, the spiritual parent of Augustine. 
Ambrose, the great magistrate, who became a great 
archbishop and teacher, owed also his education and 
holy training to his mother. His father, who was 
governor of all Gaul, and a great part of Germany, 
died while Ambrose was in his infancy. The mother, 
left with three children, succeeded in making saints 
of every one of them ; Marcellina, her only daughter, 
being afterwards of immense utility to her great 
brother in spreading the reign of Christian piety, 
and the practical knowledge of the higher life in 
Milan and its vicinity. 

In the next generation the family of St. Gregory 
the Great, as well as that of St. Paulinus of Nola, 
may be quoted as illustrious instanoes of the heroio 



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NEED OF TRUE CHRISTIAN WOMEN. 827 



Christian spirit sanctifying all the spheres of active 
life in the world, as distinguished from the life of 
the cloister. 

NEED OF TRUE CHRISTIAN WOMEN IN THE WORLD. 

Indeed, it is the homes created by such women as 
Macrina, Emraelia, Nonna, Paula, and Monica, which 
become the fruitful nurseries of the men and women 
who make the priesthood venerable, and monastic 
life flourishing and fervont, while blessing at the 
same time the world itself with the sweet active 
virtues characteristic of Christianity. Mothers who 
fulfil, beneath the eye of God, and with a full senso 
of their responsibility, the duties of motherhood, will 
rear the very men God needs from whom to choose 
both the apostolio priest, and the model Christian 
gentleman and statesman ; they will also form to 
their own image and likeness the maidens whom the 
Divine Spirit will as surely direct to follow the Lamb 
in the paths of his apostleship, or to remain behind 
to oreate and sanctify homes of their own. 

But the mothers who rear such sons and daughters, 
and such of these daughters as God wills to remain 
in the secular life to perpetuate the precious virtues 
learned from their parent, have other duties besides 
the education of children, the happiness of a husband, 
the economy of a household. The wife of the labourer 
or the mechanic has duties towards the neighbour, 
duties towards the Church, duties towards the 
various institutions of education and bonefioence in 
which every family and every individual in the com- 
munity are interested. 

But this is much more true of the wife of the 



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328 tot mibrob of true womanhood. 



wealthy man, of the magistrate, the legislator, of the 
large proprietor, the nobleman, and the prince. 
Besides their most important and most onerous house- 
hold obligations, these women have others which 
they cannot dispense with, and which, properly and 
conscientiously fulfilled, are most conducive to the 
Interests of religion, as well as to the benefit of the 
community at large. 

IMPORTANCE OF A CHRISTIAN WOMAN'S SOCIAL DUTIES. 

Treating as we are of the duties of women in the 
world— of women of all classes — it, surely, will not 
be denied that the wives and daughters of sovereigns, 
of chief magistrates under any form of government, 
and those of public functionaries of all degrees, are 
bound to receive and entertain, to appear in public 
on certain occasions, to accept invitations to certain 
social gatherings. This is, this has ever been, and 
is likely ever to be, considered a real and most im- 
portant duty, inherent to the position filled by all 
such persons. 

In our own age — not to seek examples too far off — 
we all have known or read of women, at once most 
exalted in rank and most exalted in virtue, who felt 
themselves bound to honour their position by show- 
ing a courtly grace in every circle in which duty 
compelled them to be the central figures, by dis- 
pensing a right royal or princely hospitality on every 
occasion — indeed, on every day of their lives ; — who 
knew on these very days, early or late, to visit our 
Lord, in the persons of the needy and sick. In the 
queen, the princess, the noble lady, of whatever 



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IMPORTANCE OF SOCIAL DUTIES. 329 



rank, in the gentlewoman, the merchant or the 
mechanic's wife, the Spirit of God will be sure to 
manifest his presence by the light on the features 
or in the eye, by the words dropped in conversation 
in the reception-room, at table, or even in the strictest 
privacy. 

Every one knows — even France, which upset the 
throne of the husband, has not forgotten the angelic 
virtues and noble charities of the wife and her 
daughters — how the late Queen of the French, Marie 
Amelie, was the light of Louis Philippe's court, and 
" the providence " (as they were wont to call her) of 
the poor, far and near. There never was one word 
of scandal uttered about the royal circle. She was a 
devoted and worshipped wife ; and the sons she has 
left behind show by their lives how well she dis- 
charged her motherly duties. But her daughters 
reflected in an especial manner the virtues of their 
admirable parent. One, above all the others, walked 
closely in her mother's footsteps — Louise, Queen of 
the Belgians, whose memory to this day is venerated 
in every Christian home in the land. Such women 
were worthy of the blood of St. Louis. 

Not less admirable were the princesses of the royal 
houses of Savoy, Bavaria, and Austria. More than 
one of them are at this moment candidates for 
the honours of canonisation. What though the 
king who disgraces, in the Quirinal, his line, his 
faith, and his station, should be the son of a 
saintly mother — Solomon was the son of David, and 
Roboam was worse than Solomon. The virtues 
which adorned so many princes of the ancient house 
of Savoy reappear in the prince who resigned the 



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330 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



crown of Spain, and is now content, like another of 
his near ancestors,* to become, after his young wife's 
death, the humble member of a religious order. 

No < n > who has approached the ladies who grace 
the thrones of Austria, Bavaria, Belgium, and Por- 
tugal, or who are the companions in exile, and in 
private station, of the royal families of France and 
Naples, but are as cordial as they are unanimous in 
praising in them the courtly graces which lend a 
lustre to their exalted rank, and the unaffected piety 
which adorns their private life. Wherever they are, 
the poor, far and wide, soon learn to bless them. 

CATHOLIC LADIES EVERYWHERE TRUE CHRISTIANS AS WELL 
AS WOMEN OF THE WORLD. 

Our American travellers, who have spent a single 
season in London, must have been struck by the mul- 
tiplicity of good works to which English, Irish, and 
Scotch Catholic ladies of high rank, residing there, 
devote themselves. Indeed, one has only to glance 
over the notices in the London Tablet, or Weekly 
Register, to see how active they are in promoting 
public charities of every kind. And yet only a few 
of these appear on the surface ; the greater number, 
the most costly to the noble patronesses or founders, 
are carried on quietly, far away from the public eye. 
One of these noble women, Cecilia, Marchioness of 
Lothian, died in Eome during the month of June. 
It is only since her sudden and lamented death that 
most men have heard of her unlimited generosity 
and indefatigable zeal in providing for the manifold 

* Charles Emmanuel II. died a Jesuit lay-brother. 



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HOW CHARITY AND RELIGION ARE PROMOTED. 331 

needs of the London poor. But Scotland had also 
most touching stories to tell of that charity which could 
not help giving, but loved to give in secret, like the 
life-giving warmth of the sun, which works through 
the long hours of the spring and summer and 
autumn, long after the great luminary has withdrawn 
his light. Another, no less noble and no less de- 
voted, was with Lady Lothian when God gave her 
rest in the City of the Holy Apostles ; of her num- 
berless charities England, as well as her native Ire- 
land, could tell many a thrilling tale. But she is 
still among the living ; and so is another, of world- 
wide fame as a writer, as good as she is noble — a 
passionate lover of poverty, devoting to the poor not 
only the proceeds of her literary labours, but every- 
thing she can spare from her necessary household 
expenses. And these are only three among thou- 
sands, on both sides of the Channel, who do not think 
they can dispense themselves from complying with 
the duties of their social position, while being most 
exemplary in the accomplishment of every obligation 
of family life. 

HOW CHARITY AND RELIGION ARE PROMOTED BY SOCIAL 
GATHERINGS. 

One thins: is certain — that where mothers have 
been careful to educate their sons and daughters in 
the elevating and refining atmosphere of " the 
gentle life," which is born of enlightened piety, they 
cannot fail, in a Kepublican country, to be welcome 
guests in every circle. Where a man of good stand- 
ing and education shows himself to be tru^y " the 



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332 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



scholar and the gentleman," there is no circle into 
which he may not be admitted ; and where his sisters 
have all the solid and graceful accomplishments of 
the true gentle life we have been sketching under so 
many forms, there is no circle which they cannot 
ornament, shining wherever they appear with a 
light which will hurt the eyes of none, while it serves 
to diffuse the influence of genuine goodness and 
gentleness. 

Every true Christian mother who has had herself 
experience of the power of such goodness and gentle- 
ness in an accomplished woman, will deem it her 
duty to prepare her sons and daughters for their 
appearance in society. If her home-life, her home- 
education and amusements have been in conformity 
with the rules laid down here and there in the pre- 
ceding chapters, their " coming out," as it is phrased, 
will be no sudden and abrupt transition from obscu- 
rity into dazzling light, or from simple, homely 
manners to the strange stateliness and ceremonial of 
a superior world. 

As these remarks are addressed, principally at 
least, to educated women of position, whose sons and 
daughters are supposed to display in their daily 
home-circles the accomplishments of music and song, 
there will be for them but little of novelty and no 
strangeness in their displaying their best powers fop 
the delight of the first great company assembled in 
their own honour, or for the amusement of any 
circle, even the most brilliant and cultivated, in which 
they may subsequently appear. 

The piety they have drunk in with their mother's 
milk will be a sure preventive against the foolish 



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HOW CHARITY AOT BEUGION ARE PROMOTED. 333 

vanity which troubles some light brains. Where 
singing, playing, and all the conversational arts are 
an everyday exercise in good families, and in pre- 
sence of guests who are good judges of proficiency, 
there is as little ground for vanity in the display as 
there is of novelty. What is done habitually is soon 
done unconsciously, and with the naturalness arising 
from habit come that ease and graoe which are the 
great charm of those whose home has ever been for 
them the school of " the gentle life." 

Of oourse, while an experienced and thoughtful 
mother is thus training her sons and daughters 
within her own home-sanctuary, she is fully aware 
of the importance of the social duties for which such 
training so admirably prepares them ; but she is also 
most careful that they shall not know that their 
education is directed towards any such purpose. If 
this long home preparation be carried on beneath the 
eye of God, with a final view to his honour, by 
making his religion lovely in the person of its pro- 
fessors, and by thus drawing to the truth souls for 
whom Christ died, will this not be the highest 
charity, and will not religion win the only triumph 
aimed at both by the pious mother and her worthy 
children? And, in very truth, how many souls, 
among the best, the purest, the most gifted, have 
been gained in the past, and are still daily won to 
God, by the unconscious charm of an accomplished 
but innocent young man or woman. 

So long, therefore, as society exists, the charities of 
neighbourly intercourse must be a duty incumbent 
on all, and, above all, on the professors of the true 
religion ; for true religion there cannot be without 



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334 



THE MIRROR 07 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



true charity — active, practical, and aiming at the 
• highest good of others. Neighbourly intercourse 
means for each mistress of a home that she will exert 
herself to make it a centre of attraction for all who 
can benefit her children and herself, or who can be 
benefited by them, and that her visitors shall go 
away delighted, to return again and again. It also 
means that she and her children will, in their turn, 
grace the family circles of these same friends and 
neighbours. 

The influence of the Christian mother's home- 
circles, and the very charm which she and such as 
she exert in the social gatherings where they appear, 
are the only possible and the most powerful corrective 
to the corrupting influence of that world so well 
denominated " Vanity Fair." 



WOBK OF THE WOMAN OF THE WORLD OUTSIDE OF HER 
HOME. 

With all these the woman of the world has to be- 
come acquainted ; an interest in them is as much her 
own interest as the education of her children or the 
well-being of her household. Who does not know 
that in France the magnificent Society of the Propa- 
gation of the Faith, with the millions raised annually, 
penny by penny, from poor and rich alike, with the 
fruitful missions founded and sustained in both 
hemispheres— on every point of the English-speaking 
world, as well as among the heathen— is mainly the 
work of French women ? And so is the " Associa- 
tion of the Holy Infancy," founded by the chivalrous 
De Forbin-Janson, Bishop of Nancy, and which 




WORK OF WOMEN OF THE WORLD. 335 

yearly rescues from death bo many heathen infants 
in China, and provides for their education. These. 
are only two of the great works carried on in France 
by women of the world. Their sisters in Canada do 
not belie this well-earned reputation. One has only 
to live a single week in Quebeo or Montreal to feel 
that the heart of woman there is ever open to all the 
noblest impulses of charity, her head quick to con- 
ceive generous plans, her tongue ever ready to plead 
them, and her hand well practised in working for 
every form of distress. 

PART OF THE WOUKING MAN'S WIFE. 

But have we not, it may be suggested, left the 
woman of the labouring classes a very unimportant 
part to play in social life, and in the discharge of 
what we have termed " social duties ? " 

By no means. The advice so frequently given, 
and the rules addressed to women of these classes 
in the preceding chapters will teach them how to 
make of their own homes so many schools of " the 
Gentle Life," of their sons and daughters apt and 
accomplished scholars in the true courtesies and 
graces of society ; how to make their evenings at 
home most delightful, entertaining, elevating, and 
refining to their own as well as to the guests at- 
tracted to their fireside by this twofold charm of 
refinement and bright cheerfulness. The pleasures 
— pure, heartfelt, ever fresh and welcome — which 
the good wife of the labouring man is as careful to 
provide each evening for her dear ones as she is to 
prepare them a wholesome and plentiful meal, will 



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336 THE MIR BOB OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

encourage others of her neighbours and acquaint- 
ances to follow her example. And thus there will 
be other firesides regulated in all things on her own 
pattern, which will be a safe and welcome place of 
enjoyment for herself and her children. To such 
alone ought she and they to go. 

Are such homes as these very rare among our 
people? No; thanks to God's fatherly care over 
them; and all due praise be to the wisdom and 
piety of so many true women well known to their 
religious guides, and better known still to all of 
their own class who love true goodness. 

HOW THE OOOL ARE DRAWN TOGETHER. 

For there is an occult freemasonry among the 
good, among those who truly live as becomes chil- 
dren of God, just as there is among worldlings. 
They find each other out in a neighbourhood ; they 
are drawn to each other in a crowd ; their lives 
seem to be governed by the laws of a " supernatural 
selection," which unconsciously and irresistibly 
throws them together. Have the good angels any- 
thing to do with this ? Most certainly. 

Cast a handful of gold dust into a vessel full of 
coarse sand, and shake it. If presently you seek for 
the shining speckles of the precious metal, you find 
them not : they have sunk to the bottom, and there 
they cluster together. Nay, place the vessel in 
some place where it may be heated slowly, without 
melting the golden particles, and after a time the 
mysterious laws of affinity will draw them together, 
separating them from the earthy mass, and impel- 



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HOW THE GOOD ARB DRAWN TOGETHER. 837 

ling them downward, away from the surface. Again, 
watch a flower garden in springtide, when your 
plants are in full blossom ; you will not find the bee 
and the wasp sucking the same flower. The bee 
seeks the honey to bear it home to the hive, fasting 
and toiling herself the while ; she is thinking of 
others while she is abroad and seeking the loveliest 
and most fragrant daughters of the spring, and she 
hastens homeward, laden with her treasures, only to 
hoard them up for her sisters during the long winter 
months. On the contrary, the wasp seeks the honey 
to enjoy it. Unselfish, unworldly, and motherly wo- 
men are like the bees: they go abroad to make 
honey for their dear ones, not for the purpose of 
gratifying their appetite, like the wasp, or of dis- 
playing their beautiful wings, like the butterfly ; 
and God gives them the instinct of knowing each 
other and trooping together, while they work with 
one accord and untiringly, as long as the day lasts, 
to treasure up sweet stores of enjoyment for others. 
Wasps, like selfish and pleasure-seeking people, 
also know each other ; but they do not work well 
together— they quarrel and sting each other to 
death, or victimise some innocent, harmless bee, 
because it incautiously seeks the same flowering 
shrub with themselves. 

Even so will true-hearted women, guided by the 
divine instinct within them, seek each other's society 
to encourage each other in living godly lives, to 
learn how they can improve their methods of edu- 
cating their dear ones and of brightening their 
homes, as well as to plan means for relieving the 
poor, for providing for the needs of a church in 
23 



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888 



THE MIKROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



debt, or of saving from want, temptation, and ruin 
the youthful and destitute of their own sex. 

Oh, blessed shall be the day when in this great 
city of New York, we shall see such women as these 
forming associations for the purpose of protect- 
ing innocent and inexperienced girls arriving on our 
tf lores from the many snares set for them by fiends 
of their own sex, and by men who can never have 
known a mother. There has always existed in 
Catholic Italy associations of this sort, which pro- 
vided asylums for the homeless and unprotected, 
where they could learn trades, and work for their 
own benefit till they found a suitable match ; then 
the association added to the little store laid up by 
the bride, and thus secured her a handsome marriage 
portion. Moreover, it has been the immemorial 
custom for sovereigns, for Popes, for noble ladies of 
every degree to bestow yearly, on certain feast days, 
a dower on a number of poor but portionless girls. 
This was often done by noble ladies on the day of 
their own bridals, or on some such joyous occasion, 
or in thanksgiving for some great favour from on 
high, 

We dare not make a suggestion. These lines may 
inspire some generous, womanly heart with a noble 
emulation of the charities of other lands. 

In our own there are surely souls ready to respond 
to every breath of the divine inspiration. For we 
have in our midst women of the world, who seem to 
have no other occupation but that of benefiting 
others : women who give up every pleasure to open 
homes foT the young and houseless of their own sex. 
What though their labours do not always prosper 



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HOW THE GOOD AftE DRAWN" TOGETHER. 889 

as they wish, or though men do not praise or be- 
friend their efforts, is He for whom they work blind 
or forgetful or ungrateful? 

Generous women, whoever you be, forget not that 
you labour for the Eternal God, and that your re- 
ward is not to be enjoyed on this side of eternity. 
To all of you, being what you are, we would fain 
commend these lines on "Hoarded Joys/' should 
you be tempted to repine at the slowness with which 
either sucoess or repose cometh for you : — 

M I said : 1 Nay, pluck not ; let the first fruit be 
Even as thou sayest, it is sweet and red ; 
But let it ripen still. The tree's bent head 

Sees in the stream its own fecundity, 

And bides the day of fulness. Shall not we 
At the sun's hour that day possess the shade, 
And claim our fruit before its ripeness fade, 

And eat it from the branch, and praise the tree ?' n 

But to the worldly women, who, born of Christian 
mothers and reared to the knowledge and practice 
of better things, allow the spring and summer of 
life to pass away without a single flower or fruit of 
ripened goodness for themselves or others, what 
shall we say ? They have resolved, and resolved, 
and resolved, and not one resolution has ever 
ripened into performance. Their virtues are like 
the fruits buried long centuries ago in the royal 
sepulchres of Egypt: they fall to dust on being 
brought to the sunlight. 



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THB MIRROR OF TBT7B WOMANHOOD. 



OHAPTEE XVII. 

61 LHOOD OF TITB VIRGIN" MOTHER THB MODEL 
OF MAIDENHOOD. 

The virtues and qualities which the poet attributes 
to Mart in her girlhood are those which every 
Christian mother will endeavour to develop in her 
daughters — the deep-seated piety that makes confor- 
mity to the divine will the first and last study of every 
hour and day and year, till the veil is removed, and 
the dutiful soul beholds face to face Him who 
through all eternity will study to fulfil her will ; the 
"profound simplicity of intellect," which is but the 
illumined eye of faith beholding God first and last 
and middlemost in all this wondrous world, and 
the complicated course of human history ; the " su- 
preme patience 99 which springs from the certain 
hope that such faith begets, and makes the trials of 
time seem as nought compared with the eternal pos- 
session already begun in faith ; these twin virtues 
of Faith and Hope, like the wings of the soul, lifting 
the maiden to the divine bosom even "from her 
mother's knee ; " that "wisdom in charity" which 
consists in filling the heart brimful with the chaei9 
love of the Supreme Good, in order to pour all the 



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unselfish devotion it inspires on the home first, and 
then on all outside the home, according to the en- 
lightened laws of charity; the invincible fortitude 
that nerves the soul to struggle unceasingly against 
the warring desires of earthly concupiscence, while 
bearing with unruffled serenity the ills which befall, 
no matter whence they come ; and that " circumspect 
pity" which makes the soul careful, while succour- 
ing the distress of others, and showing divinest pity 
to their most loathsome ills, not to be herself denied, 
just as when mercy leads one to plunge into 
a roaring flood to save a poor drowning wretch, 
one takes care not to be swept away by the swift 
waters. 

With all this strength of soul the Christian 
maiden must be near the maternal bosom and be- 
neath the sweet light of a mother's love, like a lily 
within the close of some august sanctuary, watered 
daily by angelic hands, and growing up in gentle- 
ness and the perfection of all loveliness. 

haby's public life the model of womanhood's 

TRIALS. 

This gentle nurture within the home will give a 
girl's soul that adamantine firmness as well as purity 
which will bear without injury the terrible trials of 
after life. Maidenhood had scarcely begun for the 
Most Blessed One when the divine purpose was un- 
folded to her, and her share in the Work of Ages # 
was foreshown, the bitter road from the manger to 

*Habacuc,iii.2, 



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342 THE 1ORE0B OP TEXJB WOMANHOOD. 



the cross ; and then the long stay on earth after Him 
in the house of John, with her full participation in 
all the manifold woes of the infant Church. She 
who was the Mother of the Bridegroom, who had 
pillowed his infant head on her bosom through the 
long journeying, back and forth, of his exile, and 
who, at the foot of the cross, received on that same 
agonised bosom the dear thorn-crowned head taken 
down from the wood, was predestined to watch over 
the birth and growth of his Bride and our Mother. 

As she suffered in Him when scourged at the 
pillar and nailed to the bitter tree, so she suffered 
in his members during the first persecutions ; was 
scourged in Paul and John, and beheaded in James, 
and stoned in Stephen, being meanwhile the model 
of all in faith that never faltered, in hope that never 
was dimmed, and in that all-bearing love which 
waiteth for his coming throughout the interminable 
years. 

How true a mirror of maidenhood and woman* 
hood. How clearly can one view in the life of that 
Mother of Sorrows the lot which all true women 
must accept. And how consoling for all these 
classes of toilers, sufferers, and waiters, whose trials, 
labours, duties, and virtues we are now going to set 
forth. 

I. 

THE DATJGHTEB8 OP THE WEALTHY HOME. 

"We have no further concern here with maidens 
who remain beneath the roof of their parents till 
they have chosen a home of their own in matrimony, 
or in religious life. What has been said must 



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CHARACTERISTICS OF AMERICAN WOMEN. 843 

suffice for them, inasmuch as we suppose their 
mothers to have faithfully discharged towards them 
all the offices of motherhood. Our present concern 
is with the daughters of wealthy families, on whom 
poverty has fallen while still unmarried. 

GIRLS REARED IN AFFLUENCE AND FORCED TO 
LABOUR. 

. 1. We approach this large and most interesting 
class with a feeling of infinite reverence. We know 
that their numbers have much increased of late years 
even in our midst, in spite of all the securities which 
surround the wealthy in a country untroubled by 
socialism ; and in spite, also, of the facilities afforded 
in a young and prosperous community for recruiting 
impaired fortunes. And our reverence is founded 
on the magnanimity with which so many young 
girls, brought up in luxury and with the most splen- 
did prospects, accept the reverse that befalls them, 
and set to work to lighten the hard lot of father and 
mother, and not unfrequently to provide for the 
wants of their whole family. 

HEROIC WOMEN IN ADVERSITY LIKE CHOICE VINES 
ON A BARREN SOIL. 

It will serve our purpose to pursue this comparison 
a little farther. The vines which bear the most 
renowned fruit and produce the wine most eagerly 
sought for, are not those that grow on the rich and 
sheltered lowlands ; just as the women most admir- 
able for heroic endurance and perseverance are those 



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344 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

who have to grow up in toil and trial and self- 
reliance. Let us listen to this description by a recent 
traveller of the port- wine district in Portugal: — 

"As I ascended the ridge of mountains which 
separates the valley of Villa Real from the port- 
wine district, I became entangled in a net-work of 
paths. ... On either side of the river Douro lies a 
district about twenty-seven miles in length and six 
or seven in breadth, of steep hills, with narrow, 
ravine-like valleys ; the soil a naked, yellow-brown, 
slaty schist. . . . Looked at from where I now 
stood, and seen in the thin atmosphere of early 
morning, with every detail sharp and clear as in a 
photograph, with hill beyond hill extending con- 
fusedly below, the appearance was that of a wilder- 
ness of utterly bare and arid peak and valley. . . . 
All over the sides of each acclivity, stone terraces 
have been built, in lines running parallel with the 
horizon; and in the poor schistous soil thus kept 
from being washed away by the rains of winter, the 
vines which make port wine are grown. ... If 
Portugal were to lapse into an uninhabited wilderness 
to-morrow, this monument of man's accumulated 
handiwork would probably outlast every single work 
of Roman, Goth, Saracen, and Portuguese. . . . 

" The flavour of the wine here produced depends 
upon the nature of the soil, certainly not upon its 
richness ; for the surface of the vineyards looks like 
the rubbish thrown up from a stone quarry ; and it 
depends also upon the great heat of the summer 
in a district shut off by lofty hills from the north 
and the north-east. The cold of winter among 
these, high-lying lands is, however, for Portugal 



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very considerable ; snow falls and lies, even in the 
valleys, and frost often lasts for the whole twenty- 
four hours. This comparative cold arrests the winter 
growth of the vine, and gives it the rest which the 
plants of temperate climates require, and is probably 
one cause of the superiority of produce of these vines 
over those grown in other parts of Portugal. . . . 
The upland vine is less productive, but makes a finer 
wine than that grown in the plain."* 

HEAR MASS DAILY. 

We have seen that, among the rules which every 
Christian knight had to observe faithfully, the very 
first was, " with pious remembrance, every day to 
hear the Mass of God's passion." If this was a sworn 
observance of every gentle knight, how much more 
so was it and ought it ever to be of every true and 
gentle lady ? In the dear old city of Quebec, where 
the writer was brought up from early boyhood to 
manhood, one of his most vivid recollections is the 
sound of the cathedral bell calling the working 
people — the market folk, particularly, who are very 
early risers — to Mass at four o'clock every morning 
of the year. And he who took on himself the duty 
of being thus ever ready at the altar of the Lamb 
each morning was the most venerable and most 
learned man among the entire clergy of Canada. 

Later, when many years a priest himself, the 
author remembers being touched to the depths of his 
soul by the simple and heroic piety of a poor servant 
girl, who, from year's end to year's end, never could 

* John Latouohe i " Travels in Portugal, " pp. 121-123. 



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346 TILB MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

retire before midnight, and " who had made a pact 
with her Guardian Angel to wake her up daily in 
time for the first Mass" at the Church of St. Francis 
Xavier. Everywhere in Catholic countries it is the 
custom to ring the Angelus bell so early that work- 
men of every description may have time to assist at 
the Adorable Sacrifice, before attending to their 
daily labour in house or field. Thus, if you chance 
to be passing up the Ehone valley in June or July, 
you will see, at the first sound of the Angelus bell, 
all who are not already in the village church hasten- 
ing thither, taking with them their implements of 
labour, which they leave outside in the porch before 
entering the sacred precincts. Shall we, in this New- 
World, where we are so free and so encouraged to 
plant and cultivate the loveliest flowers of Catholic 
piety, shall we not delight in sanctifying our daily 
toil after the manner of our forefathers? And will 
your own consciences, 0 Christian women and 
maidens ! not upbraid you with the neglect of such 
mighty graces as are thus daily within your reach P 

" Ah, wasteful woman ! . • . 
How given for nought her priceless gift, 

• How spoiled the bread and spilled the wine, 
Which, spent with due, respective thrift, 
Had made brutes men, and men divine ! " 

Believe it : the moral hardship endured in such 
occupation as we here treat of needs supernatural 
strength, and how one half-hour spent early before 
the mercy- seat, in sweet communion with Him who 
is the Bread of Life, and whose blood, applied to us 
in the sacrament, intoxicates like wine, and lifts us 



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LADY COMPANIONS AND GOVERNESSES. 347 



above ourselves, will send us forth filled with an 
energy and a joy all divine, to brave everything, and 
undergo everything, for his dear sake! Be the 
supernatural woman in your present trial ; be a true 
child of God, and He will be with you ! 

LADY COMPANIONS AND GOVERNESSES. 

2. Although we did not expressly mention this 
most interesting and deserving class of ladies, when 
instructing the mistress of the home in her duties 
towards her children and dependents, we meant that 
all that is said in various plaoes should apply in a 
special manner to those whom she associates with 
herself as a companion, friend, and adviser, or as an 
assistant in educating her children. 

The lot of most governesses is a hard one ; but, 
nevertheless, it is far preferable to that of the very 
uncomfortable person known as a lady companion. 
A governess has work to do — hard work very often, 
and, oftener still, most miserably requited. But her 
very hard work is her salvation from discouragement 
and despair. A lady companion, generally, has no 
defined position in the family, no definite duties to 
perform, no set work at certain hours, to which she 
can give her whole heart and mind—forgetful of all 
else, for the present hour, but of the pleasure of 
doing work — and good work — on souls, or for souls, 
in his honour who is the passionate Lover of souls. 

A lady companion, for the most part, is a kind of 
slave to the caprices of an aged, infirm, and whim- 
sical person, tied down to every caprice of her sel- 
fish old tyrant, unable to apply herself to any im- 
proving or congenial occupation, and continually 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



humiliated by the neglect of the family or the petty 
insults of the domestics, unable to resent either the 
odious pride and uncharitableness of the former, or 
the studied insolence of the latter. 

Happy the sensitive soul, born to better fortunes, 
often born in a sphere far superior to that of her 
present employers, who chances to fall on a truly 
noble-minded and large-hearted Christian woman ! 
For there are many Christian women whose little 
minds and selfish, narrow hearts, in spite of their 
long profession and practice of a certain kind of 
piety, would justify the very common belief that they 
were as surely born with an intellect as narrow as a 
linnet's, or a heart as small as a mouse's, as some 
people are born stone-blind or deprived of arms and 
legs. No education (but such women cannot have 
been educated !) seems to have enlarged their very 
small notions of things, and no practice of devotion 
has made a place in their hearts for anything but 
their little self. 

ADVICE TO LADY COMPANIONS. 

But no matter what may be the rank of the family 
in which a lady companion is admitted — from royalty 
down, to the latest fortune — she who resolves to 
accept such a position must expect to find it one of 
the most irksome servitude. For one elevated and 
religious womanly soul who will treat a companion 
with the respect due to gentle birth and breeding, 
and the delicate considerateness due to misfortune, 
there will be found ten unwomanly natures who will 
think it is due to their own place and importance to 
make a dependent feel her inferiority at every 



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ADVICE TO LADY COMPANIONS. 349 



moment of the day and night. Where there is great 
intellectual culture united to solid piety, there is 
little to fear of the constant humiliations inflicted by 
those who are conscious of no superiority but that of 
rank or riches. True piety is always humble, chari- 
table, considerate, kind, and courteous. Happy the 
young lady who becomes the companion of such a 
one ! She will find motherly care in one who is her 
elder, and a true sisterly friendship in one of her own 
years. 

But this is a rare case ; and, when it happens, the 
fortunate companion has only one rule to follow — to 
devote herself, heart and mind, to the comfort and 
interests of one fitted to appreciate every gift of 
mind and heart. 

God, in his admirable ways, has a most important 
mission for lady companions, and that mission is 
most remarkable in our own days. Numberless 
families, in countries where unbelief or scepticism is 
general, have been enlightened and converted by the 
agency of a pious, high-principled, and cultivated 
lady, forced by circumstances to accept the position 
of companion to the mistress of the house. This 
occurs not unfrequently among ourselves. But it is 
of still more frequent occurrence in England and on 
the European continent. While iu France we heard 
instances quoted of most remarkable conversions 
effected among the Russian nobility by persons thus 
selected for their goodness and accomplishments to 
serve as lady companions in great families. One, 
however, which happened in France itself , and which 
resulted in making most fervent Christians of an en- 
tire family given over to unbelief, may serve to show 



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THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



both what a thoroughly good lady companion can do 
by example and teaching, and what is expected that 
a true woman, well-bred, refined, and alive to the 
claims of hospitality, should do in all cases. 

Though some readers may fancy the good fortune 
of the young lady here mentioned to be an ideal, or, 
at least, an exceptional case — it is certainly, to our 
own knowledge, not so rare. Let it, however, serve 
as a mirror for ladies blessed by fortune, and in a 
position to befriend a class of persons most de- 
serving of all their tenderest and most delicate sym- 
pathy. We shall see afterwards the "reverse of the 
medal." 

TRUE KINDNESS REWARDED BY HEROIC DEVOTION. 

While the so-called " Tractarian Movement " was 
at its height, about 1840, an aged English gentle- 
man, with his only daughter, a lovely girl of nine- 
teen, had sought during the winter months the mild 
climate of Southern France, with the vain hope of 
staying the approach of death. He was of a good 
family, of cultivated mind and refined taste, deeply 
interested in the controversy then agitating the Eng- 
lish universities, and looking forward with an earnest 
longing to the day when the churches of Western 
Europe would be again one in faith and communion. 
Some years before, while seeking health among the 
valleys of Tuscany and Umbria, he had been fortu- 
nate in forming an intimate acquaintance with a 
noble and ancient family, in which deep faith and 
practical piety went hand-in-hand. The English- 
man's intellectual objections against the Church of 
Home were met with masterly skill by the amiable 



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TBT7B KIWDNESB MSWABDED BY HEROIC DEVOTION. 351 

and accomplished head of the house ; and his inve- 
terate prejudices concerning Roman superstitions and 
idolatry found an eloquent refutation in the lives of 
his friend's wife, children, and dependents. Fre- 
quent and delightful excursions among the beautiful 
villages and historical sites which abound in that 
paradisiacal region, enabled the invalid to convince 
himself that the Italian country folk were solidly 
virtuous, that their piety was anything but blind 
superstition, or their attachment to religion and its 
teachers one founded on fear and self-interest. He 
could not help contrasting the comfort, the refine- 
ment, the bright and quick intelligence, and the 
courteous manners of the mass of the rural population, 
with the stolidity, ignorance, and coarseness of the 
same class in his own country. 

Still, his convictions only led him to see that there 
were only fewer objections than he had fancied 
towards the reunion of the apostolic Church of Eng- 
land with the equally apostolic Rome. His stay in 
France afterwards did not tend to bring him nearer 
to the truth. It was only a few months before his 
end that the conversion of his daughter became the 
occasion of his own. She had been a warm admirer 
of the writings of Keble and Newman. The sweet 
songs of the " Christian Year" had been favourites 
with her from childhood ; but the celebration of the 
great feasts of the year in the beautiful churches of 
Italy, far more than the festivals of France, con- 
vinced the girl that the great reality conceived by 
Keble was to be found, not in the empty Anglican 
liturgy, but in the time-honoured worship of the 
Church of Rome, She had also read with deep 



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352 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



interest Newman's beautiful sketches of the early 
fathers, and of their love of monastic life. She found 
in France, as well as in Italy, religious communities 
of men and women, whose life was in perfect con- 
formity with the pictures contained in the writings of 
St. Ambrose, St. Jerome, St. John Chrysostom, and 
St. Basil. Father and daughter compared their im- 
pressions and their difficulties : she besought and 
obtained permission to be received into the Catholic 
Church, and her rapt happiness on the day of her 
First Communion so powerfully moved the parent 
that ten days afterwards the same happiness was his 
own. Thenceforward, till his peaceful end came, the 
bliss of both was only clouded by the grief of the 
approaching separation, and the thought on the 
dying father's mind that he left his child totally un- 
provided for. 

The estates which he owned were entailed; and 
as he had no sons, they descended to his nephew, 
a Low Churchman, to whose mind both the deceased 
and his child were the worst kind of apostates. She 
was informed, a few days after her father's burial, 
that her family had entirely cast her off, and that she 
could have no further claim on them for support or 
sympathy. 

The generous girl did not lose heart on that 
account : she had a firm trust in Him for whose sake 
she was prepared to make any sacrifice, and was 
determined to support herself by her own exertions, 
without ever appealing to her relatives at home, or 
accepting aid from strangers. She was a proficient 
in music and painting, spoke five languages, and had 
been trained, during her constant companionship 
with her father, to be eminently practical. 



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TRUE KINDNESS REWARDED BY HEROIC DEVOTION. 853 



A noble Prencli lady, who had made their acquaint- 
ance at Florence some years before, happened to live 
in the neighbourhood of the town in which they had 
been staying. She felt a warm sympathy for the 
lovely orphan, whose many accomplishments and 
beautiful character she admired. She was exceed- 
ingly kind during the last illness of the parent, made 
her husband superintend all the arrangements for 
the funeral, and then insisted on taking her young 
friend home with her for a few weeks' repose and 
distraction from her bereavement. 

A low fever, brought on by long bodily fatigue 
and severe mental trials, compelled a stay of several 
months with the family, at the end of which the lady 
proposed that she should make the castle her home 
for the 'next year, hoping that, in the interval, the 
relatives of the interesting English girl would relax 
from a rigour which she could not understand. Her 
young guest, in her perplexity, seeing no avenue 
open to her through the difficulties of her lonely lot, 
yielded a reluctant consent. There were five children 
in the house, two sons and three daughters, the 
oldest of whom was a girl of fifteen ; they were under 
the care of an elderly lady, who acted as governess ; 
and these, with the grandmother, a titled and stately 
old dame of the last century, with a large retinue of 
servants, composed the household. 

Not till after a week's stay in the castle did our 
heroine, whom we shall call Miss Edwards, discover 
that the old dowager was a rank Voltairian ; that 
her son, the count, was an avowed Materialist ; while 
the countess only clung to the religion of her fathers 
by her attachment to the Legitimist oause. The 
24 



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children were brought up in open and avowed un- 
belief, although the governess still seemed to keep 
up in private a few simple practices of devotion. 

The dowager-countess, who had followed her 
family into exile during the Eeign of Terror, spoke 
English fairly, and* was in all things a great admirer 
of England, save, as she was wont to say, "the 
absurd and superstitious reverence of the English for 
a church establishment which was only Popery with- 
out the Mass, and with the reigning Prime Minister 
for Pope." She took a great liking for the beautiful 
orphan, insisted on her having her apartments next 
to her own rooms, and put forth all the graces of a 
cultivated mind, and the charm of most fascinating 
manners, in consoling her during her first grief, in 
soothing her suffering during her illness, and in 
amusing her loneliness during convalescence. The 
old lady was kind-hearted ; her scepticism was the 
result of her early training and associations, and it 
was very seriously shaken by the unaffected piety 
and deep, unquestioning faith of the little convert. 

The latter had to relate to her venerable friend the 
whole story of her own and her father's conversion. 
This was told in presence of the count and countess, 
who, for the first time in their lives, felt an irresistible 
attraction towards the recital of interior struggles of 
two superior souls seeking for a perfect religious 
faith, and, when found, giving up the whole world 
to secure and enjoy its possession. Unconsciously 
the little convalescent was drawn into giving her 
own explanations of Catholic doctrine and practice ; 
the perfect harmony history establishes between the 
Church of the nineteenth and that of the fourth and 



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TRUE KOTMTB88 B1WABDED BY HBBOIO DEVOTION. 855 

fifth centuries; the beautiful significance of the 
sacramental system ; and the power of the solemn 
Church ceremonial in lifting the soul up to God. 
Then came a most interesting discussion of Catholic 
theories of art. Indeed, the first acquaintance of 
the count and countess with their eloquent little 
teacher — for such she now was— had been made 
while the latter was sketching some of the most 
beautiful frescoes of the Baptistery in Florence. Now, 
as she progressed towards perfect health, these 
sketches were exhibited, and the children were in- 
vited, with their governess, to be present at the 
charming stories about medieval Christian art and 
artists, which the young girl poured forth as one in- 
spired. 

And she was. During her fever she had almost 
vowed — at any rate, she had made herself a promise — 
that she would devote herself to the hospitable family 
into which, in her extremity of distress, she had been 
received and treated with such respect and tender- 
ness ; she would not quit that interesting household 
till she had enriched it with the only treasure she 
possessed in the world — a living faith. 

The countess, who had conceived a true motherly 
affection for the gifted girl, protested that she would 
never part with her, and the dowager declared that 
Miss Edwards had become necessary to her. So, to 
quiet the latter's scruples and laudable self-love, it 
was arranged that she would stay in the family as 
companion to the old countess, who, on her side 
wanted to adopt the girl as her daughter. 

About ten weeks after her father's death, Miss 
Edwards received the visit of a young cousin travel- 



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THE MIRROR 07 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



ling with his mother, and who was all but betrothed 
to his fair relative. They had spent the winter in 
Palermo, and had learned in Eome of the death of 
Mr. Edwards, without, however, hearing then of hif 
having died a Catholic . The son was deeply attache! 
to his cousin ; he was the heir to a title and a splendid 
fortune, and would have laid both at her feet if she 
consented to renounce what his mother called "the 
Papal delusion." But, though the mother pleaded 
earnestly with her niece, she found her proof against 
all the arguments she could draw from theology, 
love, and ambition; and mother and son left the 
castle without any offer of marriage being made. 

It was a keen pang for the young and fortuneless 
orphan : she loved her kinsman, though she said not 
so; and when he had gone, she was found in an 
agony of tears by the countess, who, touched to the 
heart, employed all the tenderness and delicacy of a 
true womanly affection in soothing her friend's 
bitter distress. 

Let us abridge this narrative. The dowager, 
before a twelvemonth had elapsed, died reconciled to 
the faith of her childhood, blessing her whom she 
called her daughter and angel guardian as the 
minister of God's mercy in her own behalf. From 
her son, with her dying breath, she exacted the 
promise that he should follow his mother's latest 
example, rear his children as true practical Catholics, 
and have especial care of the Christian education of 
his servants and numerous dependents. 

The promise was faithfully kept. The conversa- 
tion, the angelic life of Miss Edwards, the influence 
which her piety and goodness exercised on his 



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TBT7I KINDNESS BEWARDED BY HEKOIC DEVOTION. 357 



children and the entire household, had made a deep 
impression on him. Since his first communion he 
had never approached the sacraments. But the deep 
peace which had settled on his mother, after her 
reconciliation with God, had recalled the sweet 
happiness of his own innocent years. Then he gavo 
- his cordial support to Miss Edwards, while she set 
about, at his request, instructing and preparing th 
three oldest children for confession and communion. 

Nor was this all ; the servants were also drawn to 
the beautiful young stranger. She took it on herself 
to instruct them likewise, and said with them the 
rosary and night prayers every day, explaining so 
interestingly this beautiful devotion that, at length, 
the whole household joined in night prayers, the 
count himself reciting them. 

All this while the countess remained proof to every 
argument and example. Tenderly as she loved, and 
greatly as she admired Miss Edwards, the worldly 
education she had received, and her intimacy with 
one of the foremost female infidel writers of France, 
seemed to render her impervious to the light of truth 
and the influence of others' holy life. Nevertheless, 
she consented to aid her young friend in restoring 
the beautiful little family chapel in the castle. It 
had been neglected for more than sixty years, and 
served as a lumber-room. But, as she was herself a 
great lover of art, she gratefully accepted her friend's 
offer to decorate and paint it with her own hand. 
Miss Edwards had secretly vowed to do so in order to 
obtain the grace of the countess's conversion. 

So the good count had the chapel cleared of every 
profane article, had the windows repaired, new 



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furniture purchased, and a temporary altar made, 
the rector of the parish being invited to celebrate 
Mass. It was quite a family festival for the house- 
hold and the numerous tenantry. 

Thenceforward Miss Edwards and the countess 
laboured together to prepare designs for the frescoes, 
the illumination of the wood and ironwork, and the 
restoration of the mutilated stained glass in the 
windows. The two oldest children by this time were 
able to work at some of the details ; for our little 
apostle had been forced by her noble patrons to 
open a little school of art in the castle, and she found, 
or created, enthusiastic pupils. 

And so the years sped by. Inside and outside of 
the castle the zeal and charity of the two ladies were 
felt in many a home, and their names mentioned 
together in many a heartfelt blessing and fervent 
prayer. It was precisely what our little heroine 
wanted, that our friend should seem to have herself 
the initiative in every good work, so as to remove 
all cause of jealousy, and that she should have bo- 
fore the people the merit of every charitable deed. 
Thus all were, in reality, praying for the noble lady's 
conversion. 

Miss Edwards would persist in calling herself the 
countess's companion, though the latter loved her, 
and treated her as the dearest of sisters. They spent 
two seasons together in Paris, where the countess's 
friends were surprised at seeing her assiduous, 
together with her husband, at divine service on Sun- 
days and holy-days, and devoted to every prominent 
work of charity, while she continued to be attentive 

all the duties required of her by her position in 



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TEXTS KUTDNESS REWARDED BY HEROIC D2V0TION. 359 



sooiety. Some of her friends affirmed that Miss 
Edwards must be a female Jesuit, sent by the crafty 
order to the family of the count, to convert his 
mother and himself, and to make sure, after his 
death, of a good share of his property. All this ab- 
surd gossip did not serve the cause of unbelief in the 
estimation of the countess. Still the false shame, 
called human respect, held her back from avowing 
to her husband, or to her dear young friend, that 
she yearned to have their faith ; for she did not, and, 
as she thought, could not believe. Nor could she be 
induced to pray. 

Such was her -state of mind when the revolution of 
.February, 1848, drove Louis Philippe into exile, and 
inaugurated once more a republican form of govern- 
ment in France. The count was elected a member 
of the National Assembly, and this circumstance led 
the countess and Miss Edwards to accompany him to 
Paris, at the very moment the cholera was raging 
most virulently. The countess, alarmed, was just 
preparing to return to her family when she was 
seized by the plague. Her friend at once, as by a 
sudden inspiration, offered her own life to God in 
exchange of that of the countess, on the condition 
that He would bestow on that dear soul the gift of 
faith. The sacrifice was accepted, the countess was 
spared to live and die a most fervent Christian ; Miss 
Edwards was carried off by the pestilence, rejoicing 
that God had heard her prayer, and beseeching Him 
to remember in his mercy her friends in England, 
and one above all others, whose love still lived in 
her faithful heart. 



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8<>0 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD 

PBAOTIOAL BTJLES FOB GOYEKKE88ES. 

The preceding narrative must dispense us with 
much counselling. We have in it touched upon 
some of the difficulties that this numerous, hard- 
worked, little understood, and ill-paid class of 
persons have to meet with. We trust in God's 
blessing on this book, that wealthy mothers who 
read it, especially if they be such as would 
listen respectfully to a priest's instruction or 
adjuration, will be touched by his grace to deal 
kindly, gently, generously, in all Christian charity 
and courtesy, with those to whom they commit the 
whole or part of their own sacred function of teach- 
ing and educating. 

Parents, of whatever rank, should remember that 
young women who fit themselves, by long and care- 
ful training, for the sacred functions of educators in 
families, are persons whom it is almost sacrilege to 
treat with any sort of disrespect ; what, then, must 
the guilt be when such persons are degraded syste- 
matically, not only in the eyes of servants and other 
dependents, but especially in the eyes of the children 
whom they are expected to instruct and educate. 

Surely mothers — Christian mothers — alive to the 
surpassing importance of a thorough moral education, 
and conscious, too, of the sacredness of the duties 
that devolve on all persons to whom they intrust the 
training of their children, ought to be also aware of 
the absolute necessity of securing to such persona 
the utmost respect and consideration within their 
own households. The reasons for this are peremp- 
tory. In the first place, these persons represent tho 



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fclUOTIOAL RULES FOB GOVEBNESSES. 36l 



mother herself (represent, indeed, both parents), in 
her most sacred office of teacher. Now, reverence for 
the mother's person, and for this her office, demands 
that all who fill her place shall be reverenced in like 
manner. The second reason, akin to the first, is, 
that to teach, one must have authority ; for, as we 
have said in another chapter, "without authority 
there can be no discipline, and without discipline 
there can be no education." A third reason is, that 
the dearest interests of both parents and children 
are involved in the result of this education ; the in- 
terest of the parents, whose happiness must depend 
largely on the moral and intellectual advancement of 
their offspring, and, above all, the interest of the 
children, whose future, temporal and eternal, is 
mostly secured or sacrificed by the training they 
receive. 

It would seem inconceivable, therefore, that even 
worldly-minded parents should be so blind to what 
they owe themselves and their children, as not to 
choose their governesses with exceeding care, and to 
treat those of their choice with equal affection and 
respect. But that a Christian mother, fearing God 
and her own accountability to Him, should not deem 
it a most conscientious duty to have her governess 
reverenced as she would have her own self, and aid 
in securing her the regard and affection, not only of 
her pupils, but of servants, friends, and acquaintance, 
is simply monstrous. 

We appeal, then, to the worshipped and zealous 
mothers whose whole heart is in their home-work, in 
making of their sons and daughters children of God, 
to welcome to their families the governess they have 



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364 THB imtftO* OF TBtTB WOlfAHHOOft. 



scrupulously selected as they would an own sister, 
and to make her feel that she is regarded as such. 

This is one of the home charities, and it is also 
good policy. We now address ourselves to the 
governesses themselves. 

WHAT A GOOD GOVERNESS MUST OBSERVE. 

She also must have her heart in her work, loving 
it for its own sake, and for the sake of Him who is 
to be both her chief helper and her magnificent re- 
warder, and for the sake of the children, whose 
welfare and future abilty must depend so largely on 
her labours. 

Bear this well in mind: your success, even sup- 
posing you could succeed without his ever-present 
help, would be a barren and a joyless one without 
having your heart set on seeking and pleasing God 
before and above all things. This is the sursum cor da 
of the divine sacrifice, the lifting of our hearts and 
aims to Him from whom are light, and knowledge, 
and docility of soul, and progress in all the ways of 
true wisdom and true happiness. Cultivate and 
cherish this loftiness of heart. 

Be conscious of your own fitness for every branch 
you have to teach, and do not rest satisfied with a 
half knowledge of any science which may be neces- 
sary or useful to you. Remember that, so long as 
you live, devoting yourself as you do to teaching, 
you must study to improve yourself. This conscientious 
desire for perfecting yourself in everything worth the 
knowing, and the knowing well, will be to you a 
most precious resource should you happen to be with 
a family where you are left to yourself. In religious 




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WHAT A GOOD GOtBBNSSS MUST OBSEBVE. 3f3 



orders, one of whose chief labours is that of teaching, 
professors after their class hours are left to the 
solitude of their own rooms. He who writes these 
lines has himself thus taught for a good part of his 
life ; and he knows by^experience how sweet is that 
solitude in which one may refresh one's heart in brief 
and sweet communion with God, or in completing 
one's knowledge on some topic of actual interest or 
probable future necessity. 

Be most conscientious in preparing the matters you 
have to teach, as well as in takiDg the very best 
means to communicate your knowledge to each one 
of your young hearers. If - your heart is in your 
work, you can scarcely fail in this. Study carefully 
the characters, dispositions, and ability of each pupil. 
Love them, make them love you. Omit no art or 
exertion which can make them consider the school- 
room as a delightful place, and school-hours as a 
time of real enjoyment. There will be true enjoy- 
ment for them if each hour and each lesson makes 
them feel that they have learned something. The 
ripe fruit from the tree of knowledge, which you will 
gather for them and present to them daily, you can 
make the daintiest and most appetising of fruits, if 
you only use your woman's skill and cunning in pre- 
paring it. 

With those who are slow be patient. Do not con- 
found slowness with dullness. In looking back over 
our own college years, and those spent in teaching, 
we can now see many, very many boys, who were 
considered dull because they had not the retentive 
memory or quick apprehension of others among their 
school-mates But many of the men of quick wit 



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364 The mirror of true womanhood. 

and powerful memory have come to nothing, like 
trees blossoming before their time, and dropping 
their unformed fruit before autumn had arrived; 
while we now see the slow men, some even of the re- 
puted dunces, foremost in the senate, at the bar, on 
the bench, or gracing the priesthood. 

Form the judgment and intelligence of your pupils 
well, without, however, neglecting their memory. 
Make them understand everything, give them a 
reason for everything ; illustrate what is difficult or 
obscure by comparisons or analogies. All this will 
give the young minds you are forming a thirst for 
study, and will attach them to you; for just as 
women of your age can make the very birds, beasts, 
and fishes troop together to be fed by them, or even 
take their food fearlessly from the well-known hand, 
even so will the minds which you feed daily with 
sweet and dainty food yearn to be with you for 
fresh nourishment. 

Be gentle, calm, self-possessed, well-bred, and re- 
served. There is always in a true womanly heart a 
good deal of motherly affection and tenderness, 
which children will feel as they would the sparks 
from a charged electric receiver. Let them feel that 
in your heart there is that genuine pulse of motherly 
kindness, while you restrain it, and keep on it the 
check of reserve and dignity. Outside of school- 
hours, let this lady-like and dignified reserve never 
quit you. 

Then, again, never omit an opportunity of in- 
creasing your pupils' love for their mother. This is 
one of your duties, and its faithful discharge will not 
f ail to make her your fast friend. Show her your- 

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WHAT A GOOD GOVERNESS MUST OBSERTE. 865 

self the utmost respect, and avoid seeking to be 
familiar or confidential, no matter how much you 
may be disposed to be so. 

You will need great patience with all children; 
with some you will need extreme patience. Tou 
must endeavour to school yourself to supernatural 
patience, practised for his love who consummated our 
redemption, and bought our souls from hell by going 
to the pillar and the cross like a lamb to the 
slaughter. Few are the souls, no matter how 
stubborn, how vicious, how perverse, which are not 
overcome and won by meekness and forbearance. 

Bear and forbear, then, if you are sensitive, and 
know yourself prone to exaggerate or to create, in 
your trouble, phantoms which disappear with the 
return of serenity of soul. Precisely because you are 
thus sensitive and fanciful, never act or speak under 
irritation or emotion. How often have we to regret 
what is spoken or done impulsively ! How often do 
over-sensitive and imaginative persons make them- 
selves utterly miserable over a word or a look to 
which their own fancy lent a meaning and a colour- 
ing without any existence in reality. 

Be strong enough, brave enough, to bear with a 
great deal, both because all have to bear with much, 
and because the very patience practised at the pre- ^ 
sent moment may purchase for us the grace which 
shall secure all our future happiness. It often 
happens that in a family, the mistress whose looks 
or words offend others, all unconsciously to herself, 
is sadly burdened with many cares and griefs, and 
most deserving of your heartfelt compassion. If the 
sore heart, which she heroically conceals while filling 



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TEE IflKROR OF TROT WOlCAKHOOD. 



all the duties of her station, were laid bare to you, 
you would kneel down to worship its goodness, 
instead of taking offence at the look of pain never 
meant for you, or the unconscious word wrung from 
her as from one on the rack. 

And forbear, from judging, from speaking, from 
acting hastily even on your good impulses. Be 
mistress in the house of your own soul, especially while 
you are under the roof of another ; and this discipline 
will enable you, when God's good time has come for 
you, to ba truly mistress of your own house, governing 
it patiently, gently, lovingly, and wisely ; loved of 
your husband, your children, your servants. All 
this will come of that sweet womanly forbearance 
learned and practised by you while dependent on 
others. 

Imitate to the utmost of your power the examples 
of the lovely girl mentioned in the section on lady 
companions. Should the family in which you find 
yourself be one lost to all sense of religion, 6ee what 
your example may do to enlighten them. Perhaps 
God has sent you to them to be the means of their 
salvation. Perhaps their conversion may be the sole 
work on which your own eternal salvation depends. 
It may even be that there can be for you no place in 
the Company of the Blessed, save on the condition of 
having these souls now given to your zeal as a living 
crown around you there. Is it not worth while to try 
tthat you can do with them ? And, then, again, is 
not the Divine Workman with you, in whose hand 
you are only an instrument ? Ah ! we do not con- 
sider often enough, all of us, priests and laymen, men 
and women, young and old, how much good He 



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WHAT 4. GOOD GOVERNESS MUST OBSERVE. 367 

would do with us, poor weak instruments though 
we be, if we would only leave ourselves passively, 
humbly in the Almighty hand ! Nor do we take 
time to reflect that even a living instrument, a living 
heart, which will not obey that wise and loving hand, 
exposes itself to be cast into the Are. . . . 

Persons who have been well brought up, and have 
had from infancy all the opportunities and graces 

• necessary to form both mind and heart, are but too 
apt to misjudge families which have never enjoyed 
these advantages — families that have risen to opulence 
through a brave struggle with obstacles of every 
kind, and in which the parents are either unconscious 
of their own deficiencies, or deplore them most bit- 
terly. When brought suddenly into contact with 

• such persons, we are shocked and repelled by their 
rusticity, their rudeness, their apparent lack, not of 
culture only, but of all religious principle. We 
judge rashly. 

One most dear to the writer, and who is now with 
God, happened to be situated in some such circum- 
stances as these. A privileged and beautiful soul 
himself, and blessed from his birth with all the 
divinest influences of a Christian home and training, 
he found himself all at once living with people foreign 

• to him in religion, in culture, in manners, even in the 
way they 6poke his language and judged of all things 
human and divine. There was discontent, aversion, 
and a repulsion so great that he was on the point of 
withdrawing from a place to which, as events proved, 
he had been providentially led for the benefit of this 
very people. 

On the eve of the day fixed for his departure, he 



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368 THE MIItROB OF TBUB WOMANHOOD. 

dreamed that he was travelling in a mountainous 
region and had to scale a lofty chain which opposed 
itself like a wall to his further progress. As he 
climbed with his guide the fair slope facing the south 
and east, their path lay through a succession of lordly 
oaks and chesnuts, to the fir and heath-covered region 
near the top, where every variety of wild flower grew 
and scented the air. But the steep northern acclivity 
offered a barren and almost naked wall of rock, on 
which a ray of the sun never rested, and deep, dark 
ravines running down to the gloomy valley beneath. 
As our young traveller gazed amazed and impatient 
at this scene of weird desolation, murmuring against 
the barrenness and horrors of the place, and con- 
trasting it with the smiling and fruitful slopes they 
had just passed, he was reproved by his mysterious 
guide. " See you not," said he, u that the cause of 
all this wealth of tree and shrub and flower that you 
have been admiring and praising, is the sunlight 
which floods it the whole year round, while not one 
ray of the beneficent light ever warms these steep 
walls of barren rock, or cheers the deep gloom of 
yonder fearful ravines ? " 

The sleeper awoke to understand that man's soul, 
also, needs the sunlight of divine grace to warm its 
barren and rugged nature, its dark and dangerous 
sides, into life and fertility and moral loveliness. So 
he remained true to his post, and the spot where that 
vision was sent him now blooms with the fairest 
flowers and fruits of supernatural goodness. 

Let us also be warned by our own very f retfulness, 
impatience, and uncharitableness that it is not the 



God who inspires our distaste or aversion ; 




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WHAT A GOOD GOVERNESS MUST OBSERVE* 869 



and let us gain his blessing by applying ourselves, 
with bis aid, to bring light into the dark places, and 
to make what is barren and naked bloom like the 
garden of God. 

"Where this inferiority of culture is apparent in the 
mistress of the home, it must be your study never to 
allow her to feel that you perceive her deficiency or 
that you are conscious of your own superiority. On 
the contrary, you must endeavour to be more respect- 
ful and deferential than if she were your superior in 
intelligence and accomplishments, as she is in wealt 
or social position* 

Should it so happen, however, that you cannot re- 
main in the family, no matter from what cause, there 
are two things which it behoves you to observe in 
leaving : the one, that you continue to the very last 
moment to show yourself the true lady, not permitting 
yourself either complaint or quarrel, though never so 
bitterly provoked, that not a word escapes your lips 
that can lower you in your own esteem ; the other is 
to make every sacrifice of feeling, temper, and even 
interest, rather than not part in perfect friendship 
with the family. 

But, supposing the worst, that you cannot leave, 
and that your life is almost made intolerable, we can- 
not impress on you too strongly the necessity of 
strengthening your soul by prayer, by the sacraments, 
and by an unfailing trust in God. 

SCHOOL-TEACHERS* 

The rules given above to governesses, as well for 
their spiritual advancement, as for their intellectual 
improvement, their thoroughness in every branch 
25 



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370 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



they undertake to teach, their devotion to their pupils, 
and their general deportment, apply to this most 
numerous and most respectable class of women, 
young women, for the most part, in our country. 

To parents who destine their daughters for this 
most important and most honourable profession, as 
well as to young girls who feel impelled towards it, 
there is one suggestion we feel bound to make. Let 
no influence or temptation ever induce the former to 
send their daughters to mixed colleges or normal 
schools, or the young girls themselves to consent to 
go there. It is one of those extreme cases where 
parents who fear God, instead of using their authority 
to throw their innocent children in the way of certain 
danger, are bound, on the contrary, to use it in dis- 
suading and preventing them from a course fraught 
with peril. 

SPECIAL TRAINING FOR SCHOOL-TEACHERS : IN ENGLAND. 

"We are addressing our advice to Catholic parents, 
of course ; to those of other denominations we have 
no right to speak. In England, the pupil-teachers 
who are preparing to graduate as school-mistresses 
receive a special training from the Sisters of Notre 
Dame de Namur, or from the Sisterhood of the Holy 
Child Jesus, both of which were especially selected 
by the Government, in conjunction with the bishops, 
as the persons best fitted to train young girls for this 
vocation. 

HIGH STANDARD OF EXCELLENCE. 

This continual seeking after the highest excellence, 
both in the sciences to bo acquired and in the methods 
of communicating knowledge to others, has a most 



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HIGH STANDARD OF EXCELLENCE. 371 



elevating effect on the Sisters themselves, as well as 
on the pupil-teachers. It compels the former — even 
were they inclined to be satisfied with a low standard 
of excellence — to aim at having in their own profes- 
sors and in their methods the very highest ideal, and 
of never being satisfied with mediocrity or a wretched 
system of make-shifts. 

It is the wish and the aim of the hierarchy to have 
for all Catholic schools teachers trained to this two- 
fold superiority of knowledge and method, as well as 
moral purity. This is a result which all good 
Catholics and good citizens are bound to promote by 
every means within their power. For on our success 
in forming school-teachers equal at least, if not 
superior, to all others in attainments and practical 
ability, and decidedly superior in living faith and 
practical piety, depends not only the welfare of the 
state, but the honour and prosperity of religion 
itself. 

So, in religious communities, where such young 
girls are formed, no pains or sacrifice should be spared 
to make them perfect and unexceptionable in every 
way ; every such pupil sent out from our academies 
ought to be enabled to take her stand at once before 
the public as an accomplished teacher and a trust- 
worthy teacher. In our parish schools the formation 
of these young girls ought to bo for the pastor, and 
for all who assist him in the divine labours of educa- 
tion, a matter of unremitting zeal. While directors 
of conscience, when they have discovered what is the 
bent of these young girls, ought to bestow on their 
guidance and instruction in solid and enlightened 
piety more than ordinary care. 



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372 THB MTEROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



The whole future of the Church and the country 
lies in this very point. 

IMPORTANCE OF PROPER REMUNERATION. 

To our magistrates, legislators, and public men who 
have not only the making and administration of our 
laws, but the distribution of the public money and 
the remuneration of every public trust and service, 
we would earnestly represent : that of all the profes- 
sions devoted to the service of the commonwealth not 
one is more worthy of respect and liberal support than 
that whose sole occupation is to educate the sons and 
daughters of the labouring classes, and not one, at 
this writing, is more exposed to be sacrificed to the 
illiberal and ignorant cupidity of our municipal 
politicians. 

Defenceless young women, who have spent all their 
years since early girlhood in fitting themselves for 
this most important function of public teaching, are 
not only overworked, but they are underpaid, and are 
threatened with a further reduction of the wretched 
pittance received from the people's money. 

They are the daughters of the people, intrusted 
with the performance of the labour of all others most 
affecting the homes and happiness of the people. 
We appeal to the people to see to it that their hard- 
earned money go rather to the support, independence, 
and necessary comfort of this devoted class of 
teachers, than to swell the already too rich gains of 
so many functionaries without anything like a serious 
function to perform. 

ADVICE TO THE TEACHERS THEMSELVES. 

To the teachers themselves we cannot too earnestly 



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DEVOTION tO THE QUA RDIAN ANGELS. 373 



recommend a sincere love of their profession, a firm 
determination to rise daily to a higher degree of 
excellence both in their knowledge and method of 
teaching, a love of their holy work for the sake of 
the work itself, and a fervent piety which will not 
only enable them to see God present in the school- 
room and aiding their own earnest labours, but God's 
angels, too, invisibly present and seconding every 
effort to enlighten the young minds and hearts in- 
trusted to them. 

DEVOTION TO THE GUARDIAN ANGELS. 

Never begin your class without a prayer to the 
Guardian Angels ; make your little ones join you in 
it. Give them an early knowledge and love of these 
glorious spirits ; teach them what their ministry is 
towards us, who are God's adopted children. This 
will easily seize upon intelligence, imagination, and 
affections. This sweet and most beautiful devotion 
to the holy angels appeals easily to the heart of child- 
hood ; and, besides, it places the mind of youth in the 
central truth of the entire supernatural order of which 
Christ is King, and these great spirits are the 
administrators in our behalf. 

PUPILS AND PARENTS. 

Do not be cast down or discouraged in your divine 
work of doing the best you can with every child com- 
mitted to you, either by the rudeness or perverseness 
of the children themselves, or by the ignorance or 
stupidity of the parents. "Well do we know how much 
the work of education depends on the sympathy, the 
support, the cordial co-operation of the parents, 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



Well also know we how dispiriting it is to find any- 
thing but sympathy or support from those to whom 
one would naturally look for both ; how the head 
aches and the heart burns, when a superior is cold or 
indifferent where he ought to be fervent in his praise 
and most zealous in his assistance, or when a stolid 
father or peevish mother interferes to prevent all 
reformation or progress in a child, or to ruin discip- 
line by taking away from the teacher all authority. 

IN DEEPEST DISCOURAGEMENT SEEK CHRIST. 

These hardships, of general and daily occurrence, 
make the load a poor teacher has to bear intolerable : 
and what can we say to each one of you, who faint 
beneath your burden, without a voice to cheer you or 
a hand to raise you up ? This : Look to Him who is 
ever by your side, especially in your hour of trial. 
" The whole life of Christ was a cross and a martyr- 
dom : and dost thou seek for thyself rest and joy ? 
Thou errest, thou errest, if thou seekest aught elso 
than to suffer tribulation; for this whole mortal life 
is full of miseries and everywhere marked with 
crosses. . . . Set thyself, then, like a good and 
faithful servant of Christ, to bear manfully the cross 
of thy Lord, for the love of Him who was crucified 
for thee." * 



* " Imitation of Christ," B. II.. ch. x 




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THE DIVINE 00MF0RTS OP POVERTY AND TOIL. 3?5 



CHAPTEE XVIII. 

THE DIVINE COMFORTS OF POVERTY AND TOIL. 

Verily, without this magnificent brotherhood be- 
tween angels and men, and between man and God 
Himself incarnate in the Son of Mary, and become the 
elder Brother of us all, there would be but little light 
to cheer the dark places of perpetual and hopeless 
toil, but little comfort to warm poverty shivering over 
the expiring embers on her hearth-stone, with scarcely 
a morsel of bread for to-day and naught but bitter 
forebodings for the morrow. What would the world 
be — even the labour world of free America — without 
the faith in Him who said, " Blessed are the poor! 
. . . For theirs is the kingdom of heaven ! " Oh ! 
fools, fools that we are ever for one moment to forget 
or overlook the sublime, the all-embracing reality, 
that we are the heirs of eternal bliss, toiling, suffer- 
ing, humiliated for a little space of life, to rest, to 
enjoy, to be glorified everlastingly. 

Hail, then, ye daughters of toil and poverty, infi- 
nitely dear to the heart of Jesus Christ, dear to the 
heart of his poverty-loving Mother, and most dear to 
that of royal Joseph — Joseph the carpenter, whose 
existence was devoted to unwearied toil for the sup- 
port of these two, and whose blissful privilege it was 
to die in their embrace, cheered by their voice, and 



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3?8 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

made infallibly sure of the eternal joys by the pre- 
sence and the word of the Redeemer of Israel ! May 
He inspire us with words of light and strength that 
may find their way to your minds to show you in 
what a right royal road you are travelling, if yours 
be the path of hard and unceasing toil, and reach 
your hearts to make you love this divine company of 
toilers in which our Jesus is ever chief, and in which 
his most beloved companions are the Mother who 
bore Him and the faithful man who watched over his 
infancy and boyhood. We approach the ranks of 
this great army of women labourers with reverence 
and awe, seeing at their head these three august 
personages, the most so of all whose feet have ever 
touched and hallowed this earth of ours. And be- 
neath the eyes of these three we desire to write every 
sentence, every word in these remaining pages, that 
so, the good done thereby and the consolation brought 
to sorely tried hearts, may be the pleasant crown of 
our toil in this book. 

TOILERS IN THE SHOP, 

In those Christian ages when religion was free to 
lighten gradually and then to break for ever the yoke 
of the bondsman, to lighten also the burden of the 
labouring man, to give to labour its dignity and to 
secure to the labourer by her edicts and influence 
a just remuneration, there was offered to the world 
no spectacle so sad, so disgraceful to the manhood of 
Christendom as these millions of women who, in the 
most civilised (!) countries, are, at this moment, 
subjected to labours more intolerable, and accom- 
panied by prospects of livelihood much less certain, 



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HOW THE MEDIEVAL CHtJBOH, ETC. 377 

than the worst criminals ever condemned to the 
galleys ! 

HOW THE MEDIJ3VAL CHURCH FREED THE SERF. 

It may be well to see, just as our boasted nine- 
teenth century — the great century of humanity — draws 
towards its close, how the Church, in the year 1060, 
raised the poor serf, tied down to labour on the soil, 
to the dignity of a Freeman, and in whose name 
she did it. We are in a monastery where a solemn 
assemblage of lords ecclesiastical and temporal is 
held to bear witness to a solemn act of emancipation. 
Here is the instrument : 

"In the name of God, the Almighty Father, and 
in the name of his only Son, who was incarnate to 
deliver men from the slavery of sin, and to adopt 
them as his sons, we, that He may deign to remit 
us the sins that we have committed, restore to liberty 
our men who have been subject to the yoke of servi- 
tude : for the Lord God has said : Remit and it shall 
be remitted to you : and in speaking to his Apostles, 
He said: You are all brethren. Therefore, if we are 
brethren, we ought not to keep any of our brethren 
in a servitude which they do not owe to us, as Truth 
Himself declares: Let no man call you master, 
blaming less the arrogance of human pride, than 
the injustice of domination : that is why we eman- 
cipate from all servitude our serfs, both men and 
women."* 

* Archives de Congues dans lcs Mi moires sur le Rouergue, 



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378 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



HOW SERVITUDE IS RESTORED IN OUR MIDST. 

How happens it that in a great city there is an army 
of women, young for the most part, some of them 
scarcely emerged from early girlhood, whose numbers 
are daily increasing, and who are as helplessly, 
almost as hopelessly, the slaves of our wealthy shop- 
keepers, as if they were born bondwomen on their 
hearths, and bound to give their taskmasters un- 
limited labour without the legal right to be housed, 
clothed, cared for in illness, or secured by their 
owners against sheer starvation ! 

Taking those among the weary toilers who are 
supposed to stand at the head of their class, the head 
dressmakers and saleswomen, though compelled to 
wear costlier attire than their sister seamstresses, 
they are not much better off in the way of remune- 
ration. A head dressmaker has to serve an appren- 
ticeship of several years of the hardest labour and 
closest application before she can hope for steady 
employment. During this long and laborious pre- 
paration, she has to support herself and to dress well ; 
and, when she does succeed in finding a position, her 
scanty wages go almost entirely towards providing 
herself with the stylish and costly raiment which her 
employer insists on her wearing, in order, as he says, 
to please the fashionable customers who daily pass 
through her hands for measurement, &c. . . . Then, 
again, she is responsible for the work of her aids 
and of all the seamstresses who work under her 
direction. Stuffs lost or spoiled, dresses wrongly 
made, &c, are placed to her account. "We say 



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ADVICE TO DftESSMA&ERS, BTO. 879 



nothing of the jealousies and countless annoyances 
inseparable from such a position. 

HARD LOT OP DRESSMAKERS. 

Together with this cruel responsibility there is 
toil without cessation, both for the head dressmaker 
and for all under her. How ill-requited are these 
interminable days, and, not unfrequently, sleepless 
nights, we need not say. The strongest constitutions 
soon give way, and the ruin thus wrought is irrepar- 
able. No medical skill avails to build up again a 
frame overworked long before its maturity, or, what 
is more, to raise up the spirit hopelessly broken by a 
long struggle against fatigue and poverty, intolerable 
tyranny and utter despair, at an age when a young 
girl needs the open air and the sunlight, and all 
that is most pleasant and cheering in God's bright 
world. 

There are other hardships, other dangers, of a 
still more serious nature and to which we would fain 
not be forced even to allude. Let us, therefore, give 
this class one word of advice and exhortation. 

ADVICE TO DRESSMAKERS AND SALESWOMEN. 

Respect yourselves sovereignly; and, precisely 
because you are poor, dependent, and constrained to 
do hard work for very little money, never permit 
anyone placed above you in your labour so much as 
to breathe a word capable of bringing a blush to 
your cheek. That you are dependent on your labour 
is not a shame, nor a disgrace, nor a sin ; your poverty 
is honourable, your anxious desire to make your 



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380 TIlx. 1ORB0R OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



labour yield aid and support to the dear ones at home 
as well as to yourselves, is most honourable to yon ; 
but your virtue is God's treasure as well as your own 
most precious fortune : guard it with the spirit, the 
pride, the indomitable courage that become one who 
knows herself to be " a child of God." 

You need not be told whence these dangers threaten 
you in your sacred honour : they come from the very 
necessity, sometimes, of being dressed abovo your 
means ; more frequently still from that natural 
vanity which makes one desire to appear as well as 
persons of one's own age and class, and whose rich 
dress seems to make them beings of a different order. 
" Handsome is who handsome does ! " Remember it 



Then, be punctual to hours, be faithful and con- 
scientious in your labour; be strictly and most 
scrupulously careful never to keep or lose or waste 
the most trifling portion of what is committed to you . 
And to this high- principled honesty add a truthful- 
ness that would scorn to equivocate or prevaricate 
in any circumstance, even when your horror of false- 
hood may cost you your place. 

There is a class of women toilers worse off even 
than the seamstresses or milliners: they are the 
saleswomen, who have to dress very expensively, to 
be on their feet twelve or thirteen l^ours daily, 
without being permitted to sit down once ! and yet 
they are exposed at any moment to be discharged 
without warning or reason. There is not a morn- 
ing on which, at their arrival at the shop door, they 
are not liable to be told that their services are not 



well. 



needed ! 




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WOMEN IN MANUFACTURES. 



381 



MODERN LEGISLATION HEEDLESS OF THIS SERVITUDE. 

"We hasten over these details with an indignation 
which we can but ill conceal ; and yet we only touch 
very, very lightly on a few points, and not the worst 
points either, of a system which is daily growing in 
its oppressiveness, its pitiless cruelty towards the 
young of the weaker sex : and no manly voice is 
raised to protect them ! 

Besides, our indignation is all the more righteous 
that our boasted civilisation and improved states- 
manship aim daily at ignoring more and more the 
protecting agencies employed in former times by the 
august Mother of nations and individuals, to shield 
women of every age, the girl and the maiden particu- 
larly, against the tyrannies of labour, the sufferings 
of extreme want, and the many temptations to which 
youth and poverty expose the sex. Alas ! the day is 
past when that Mother could raise her voice, and 
compel the manufacturer and the shopkeeper, under 
pain of ruin temporal and eternal, to be just, to be 
kind, to be chaste and fatherly ; and compel, if need 
were, the sovereign, the legislator, and the magistrate 
to interpose their authority between pitiless greed 
and helpless indigence ! 

WOMEN IN MANUFACTURES. 

We have mentioned the words milliner and seam- 
stress : they form an army by themselves. Of the 
still greater army of women employed in fabricating 
the rich and gorgeous materials that fill our mer- 
chant's warehouses, as well as the hundreds of other 
articles that are known to trade as the special industry 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



of women, we could now wish to speak befittingly. 
It is a hard task. But let us draw a picture of these 
mighty hosts of women-toilers from a work just now 
passing through the press, and compiled from the 
most authentic and the best official sourcos. 

THE GLORIOUS SIDE OF MODERN INDUSTRY. 

" What is called la grande Industrie has given birth 
in the present age to so many wonders, and so many 
marvellous creations, that we are too apt to forget 
what has been the cost of all this progress. When we 
go into one of these exposition buildings where all 
the masterpieces of strength, patience, skill, and taste 
lie before us in splendid array, we cannot help yield- 
ing to a warm sentiment of admiration and gratitude 
towards that resistless power which is labouring 
unceasingly to transform the face of the earth. Here 
are light, soft, silky tissues whose mingled colours 
remind one of the brightest flowers, cloudy-looking 
gauzes whose warp and woof are invisible to the eye, 
sparkling gems which the miner dug up from the 
earth under the shape of a dull pebble, and whose 
artistic setting combines all the elegant fancies of 
every age and clime. Over there are still greater 
wonders, . . . telescopes, which shall soon leave the 
firmament without a single unexplained mystery, and 
render daily the impress of the divine hand more 
manifest ; microscopes, which, in exploring the infi- 
nitely small, almost equal in analytical power the 
creative power itself. Further on you see these pro- 
digious furnaces that produce weekly as much as two 
thousand tons of iron, those stupendous pieces of 
machinery with which you might think you could 

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THE MURDEROUS SIDE, ETC. 



383 



move the world, these mechanical forces which, if 
combined, would equal the force of gravitation of 
this terrestrial globe ; and then, again, the wonders 
of steam navigation, of railroad travelling, and 
photography ! in fine, that electric cord which will 
soon enclose the earth in a symbolic circle, place us 
in instantaneous communication with our antipodes, 
and thus enable pcience to begin to realise the great 
unity of the human race foreshown by the Gospel. 

" In presence of such an exhibition one almost 
feels one's self becoming a pagan, deifying over again 
human might and genius. . . . 

u Such is the song of triumph and thanksgiving 
which industry breathes into her sons, and which all 
of us, on certain occasions, find ourselves singing. 
But we should soon change our language if we could 
only see the wonder-worker at her task in her own 
laboratory. We should wonderfully moderate our 
enthusiasm if we only knew how much the master- 
pieces displayed to our view have cost, and are still 
costing, of suffering, tears, and blood, of lives of 
men and women and children ! The inventor has 
not been the only victim sacrificed to his love of 
science and humanity ; not rarely entire generations 
have sacrificed their health in bringing about a single 
industrial progress." 

THE MURDEROUS SIDE OF MODERN INDUSTRY. 

"What is still worse, the most frequent victim of 
industry is not man, fitted by his nature for the 
struggles and dangers of active life and outdoor 
labour it is woman, it is the child which the im- 
placable necessities of trade opposition and of the 



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THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD, 



lawp of cheap production sacrifice, against all the 
laws of nature, to the unceasing toil of the factory. . . 

"Medical science has drawn up a list of the dis- 
eases which women infallibly contract while pursuing 
this sort of life. "We must summon courage enough 
to read this long and mournful catalogue. 

" First of all comes the woman worker properly 
so called, who belongs to all ages and countries — 
the seamstress. Bent over her work during whole 
days, and sometimes whole nights, she loses her 
erect form and becomes round-shouldered ; she fre- 
quently becomes a bloodless, consumptive thing, and 
almost certainly loses her sight. Tf she works on a 
sewing-machine, its continuous pulsations are sure 
to produce the most serious organic disorders. 

" Girls who work at the loom are equally to be 
pitied : they are often quite young children, and 
with their little undeveloped bodies, and feeble 
strength, are forced to spend eleven, twelve, and 
thirteen hours standing upright near a loom, the 
• continuous clatter of which never fails in the long 
run to disturb the nervous system. 

" The woman, the young girl, whose skilful hands 
have woven the richly -coloured stuffs which delight 
our eyes, is subject to various ulcers and other serious 
disorders of the circulation of the blood, arising from 
this compulsory habit of standing all day ; nay, she 
may be troubled with the painful disease known as 
the noise of the shuttle evermore re-echoing in her 
chest."* 

• Rene" LavollSe, La Question du Travail des Femmes, in Le 
Correspondant of October 25, 1877. 



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ILLUSTRATED BY THE AFRICAN LOCUST PLAQUE. 385 



GODLESS INDUSTRY A SOCIAL PLAGUE-SPOT. 

Serious students of history, scientific men, and 
travellers will appreciate our purpose in thus warn- 
ing, by these illustrations, the public conscience in 
our own midst. One* whose unrivalled pen has 
written so many most beautiful and instructive 
volumes, thus describes the beginning and progress 
of that fearful plague : 

ILLUSTRATED BY THE AFRICAN LOCUST PLAGUE. 

" His finger was directed to a spot, where, amid 
the thick foliage, the gleam of a pool or of a marsh 
was visible. The various waters round about issuing 
from the gravel, or drained from the nightly damps, 
had run into a hollow, filled with decaying vegeta- 
tion of former years, and were languidly filtered out 
into a brook, more healthy than the vast reservoir 
itself. Its bands were bordered with a deep broad 
layer of mud, a transition substance between the 
rich vegetable matter it once had been, and the mul- 
titudinous world of insect life which it was becoming. 
A cloud or mist at this time was hanging over it, 
high in air. A harsh and shrill sound, a whizzing 
or a chirping, proceeded from that cloud to the ear 
of the attentive listener. What these indications 
portended was plain. . . . Agellius and his 
guest looked at each other in dismay. • It is the 
locusts,' they whispered to each other, as they went 
back into the cottage. 

" Instances are recorded in history of clouds of the 

* John Henry Newman. 
26 



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386 THE MIRROR 02 TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



devastating insect crossing the Black Sea to Poland, 
and the Mediterranean to Lombardy. It is as nu- 
merous in its species as it is wide in its range of 
territory. Brood follows brood, with a sort of family 
likeness. • . . Even one flight comprises my- 
riads, upon myriads, passing [imagination, to which 
the drops of rain or the sands of the sea are the only 
fit comparison. So dense are they, when upon the 
wing, that it is no exaggeration to say that they 
hide the sun. And so ubiquitous are they when 
they have alighted on the earth, that they simply 
cover or clothe its surface. . . . Not only the 
crops and fruits, but the foliage of the forest itself, 
nay, the small twigs and the bark of the trees are 
the victims of their curious and energetic rapa- 
city. • . • They take pains to spoil what they 
leave. Like the Harpies, they smear everything 
that they touch with a miserable slime, which has 
Ae effect of a virus in corroding, or, as some say, in 
scorching and burning it. And then, as if all this 
were little, when they can do nothing else, they 
die — as if out of sheer malevolence to man, for the 
poisonous elements of their nature are then let loose 
and dispersed abroad, and create a pestilence ; and 
they manage to destroy many more by their death 
than in their life."* 

THE ANCIENT CUURCH THE SOLE HELPER OF WOMAN. 

No, please God ! She is still living to speak to 
the minds and hearts of the toiling millions, to cheer 
and sanctify and guard their homes; to bless the 

♦ " CalUsta," ch. xiv. and xv. 



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APPEAL AGAINST HEARTLESS INDUSTRY. 387 



union of the working man with his chosen compa- 
nion, to baptise their children, and protect their 
souls and bodies from the advance of these odious 
doctrines, and the hosts of impure and loathsome 
creatures that undertake to propagate them. 

There is no authority, no living institution, no 
power on earth conscious of its ability to save woman, 
to save our homes, to save society and civilisation from 
the joint destructive forces of an industry without 
a conscience and a socialism without a God, outside 
of that grand old Catholic Church, to whom alone 
have been made the promises of immortal life and 
unfailing love for the nations. 

Would to God that a spark of the divine fire which 
ever burns in the heart of the great Mother, could 
glow in our words, as we now address ourselves to 
all enlightened readers in favour of these mighty 
armies of women toilers the whole world over ! 

APPEAL AGAINST HEARTLESS INDUSTRY. 

We warn manufacturers and capitalists of every 
kind, who employ large numbers of persons, that 
they cannot persist in violating the laws of conscience, 
of humanity, of nature, without at length turning 
and banding against their heartless greed all the 
forces of the moral world — nature, humanity, and 
conscience, marshalled against them by a revolted 
public opinion. 

Spare little children, spare girls of tender years, 
spare women who are burdened with the cares of 
maternity, Tou need the labour of the poor man ; 
you shall need, presently, the labour of his sons and 



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f>^9 THE KTRHOR OF TRTJR WGATAHTIOOD. 

daughters : pray, tell us, what sort of children can 
that overworked, bloodless, consumptive woman 
rear — if you persist in thinking, or in acting as if 
you thought, that her nerves and muscles can outlast 
the iron and steel of your machinery? And how 
often have your looms broken down or got out of 
order, since she began her long labours by day and 
her vigils by night in the midst of their ceaseless 
clatter? You are careful, however, to repair your 
looms, or to renew a broken shaft, or wheel, or 
bolt ; but what care you for the restoration of that 
poor, pale woman's health when it gives way at 
length, or for its preservation by plentiful and 
wholesome food, by a warm and comfortable home, 
by refreshing sleep, and the simple, sweet delights 
of her own fireside ? 

IT errs down the treb to gather the fruit. 

Foolish man! You do not cut down in your 
garden the peach- tree, the pear-tree, or the apple- 
tree to get at their delicious fruit, for, you are 
mindful of the needs of another season ; you would 
not set fire to the cotton-field in spring because a late 
frost had impaired the prospects of the next harvest : 
are the homes of yorr workmen, and workwomen, 
Kxss dear and less piecious to you, even in view of 
your industrial prospects, than the field in which the 
cotton they manipulate is grown ? Is the peach, or 
the pear, or the apple, a fruit more rare or precious 
in your calculations than the children of your de- 
volved toilers ? 




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BIRTH OP THE FACTORY GIRL. 889 



IT DESTROYS THE CHILD, THE WOMAN, AND THE HOME. 

You are careful to prune the tree, to manure it, to 
take every measure that the currents of life, each 
year, shall be renewed and reinvigorated in trunk 
and branches; and you exhaust the currents of life 
in the veins of your working men and women, and 
care not what may befall them, provided that your 
mills turn out so many bales of goods at a stated 
time. The child you employ is crippled even before 
she enters girlhood; the fresh and blooming girl 
before she reaches womanhood is like a half-opened 
flower, drooping, colourless, and faded on its stem; 
while the once healthy and happy mother affords no 
nourishment, or only sickly nourishment to her puny 
offspring. 

Is not this an outrage on the most sacred laws of 
nature, on what the moral world holds to be most 
dear? 

LOOK OW THIS PICTURE. 

But there is worse than this. We hold up as a 
mirror the following description of maidenhood and 
womanhood in European factories, and leave it to 
our experienced readers to say if the features seen 
therein are those of any of the girls or women em- 
ployed in our great American establishments. 

BIRTH OF THE FACTORY GIRL. 

"Moralists show us the factory girl born amid 
want and corruption, almost entirely separated from 
her mother by the requirements of the workshop, 
forsaken rather than reared in one of those wretched 



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890 TOT MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

burrows which are the only home of the working- 
man, and in which the only examples set before her 
childish eyes are scenes of drunkenness and dissipa- 
tion : these examples follow her first footsteps as she 
begins her industrial career, while still a child. For 
even at that tender age she can sift the coke cinders 
and watch a few spindles, or perform some other 
light labour not above her strength* 

HER GIRLHOOD. 

" It too frequently happens that by applying her 
to such untimely and barren labours as these, no 
time is left for religious instruction, for attendance 
at school, nay, even for the outdoor exercise so 
necessary to physical development. Thus the child 
grows up to adult age, and becomes an apprentice. 

" At this critical epoch begin for factory girls the 
terrible trials that so few of them pass through vic- 
toriously. Left alone and unprotected, without ex- 
perience or instruction, in the midst of vast and 
crowded workshops, subjected to daily labour lasting 
eleven, twelve, or thirteen hours, obliged to be at 
work before dawn and to leave it after nightfall, 
obliged also, too often, to work side by side with 
men, and almost invariably underpaid for their 
labour — these poor girls are exposed to ever-present* 
temptations and allurements to sin. 

HER MAIDENHOOD AND ITS DANGERS. 

" Should it happen that the sexes are separated in 
the workshop the girls are still under the direction 
of the male superintendents, who, from their autho- 



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HKB MA BETED LIFE. 



891 



rity and influence can do great mischief. In fine, 
during the long working hours, in the unavoidable 
half-intimacy arising from proximity in the same 
occupation, conversations are carried on in half- 
whispers, and very unedifying confidences are made 
by one girl to another, which open up to an innocent 
soul an evil world unsuspected hitherto. Then, there 
are coarse jokes, indelicate allusions, raillery more 
fatal than outspoken obscenity, and, above all, the 
contagious example of their associates, all combining 
to destroy the very last remnants of native modesty 
preserved beneath the paternal roof. • • . 

HER MARRIED LIFE. 

" The industrial labour of women, and this is its 
most serious result, tends to the utter destruction of 
the working man's family, and the desertion of his 
home. Leaving the house before sunrise, and return- 
ing to it after dark, and tied down to her post in the 
workshop during the daytime, the working woman 
is only in name a wife and a mother ; she is degraded 
down to the nature of a factory hand. There are no 
more meals in common, at least, during the day ; for 
she has no time to prepare them. There are no fire- 
side joys for her : how can she tidy and brighten 
things in her poor little home when she comes back 
to it after twelve hours of hard labour, harassed, 
exhausted, and only yearning for rest and sleep ? 
There are no sweet meetings at evening, after the 
day's toil, between husband, wife, and children. 
The husband knows that he will fiad no fire on his 
hearth, no warm food to cheer him, nothing but a 
dirty and untidy room, and a nervous and ill-tempered 



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THB MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



woman, so he will go, like his mates, to the tavern, 
to eat and drink with them there, and to go home at 
midnight, if he goes home at alL 

HIB BARREN AND DESOLATE HOME : BABY FARMING. 

" There are no children in these desolate homes. 
They are a nuisance to parents who have to work all 
day — they take up too much time. Scarcely are they 
born, when they are sent to nurse in some of these 
well-known ' baby-farms/ where the deaths among 
these little innocents yearly amount to 25, 30, 40, 50, 
60, and 70 per cent. . . . All are thus deprived 
of this tender care so needed by infancy, of these 
first teachings given by a mother through her tears 
or her smiles ; they lack that first education on a 
mother's knees (V Education des langes), which no after- 
training can supply."* 

This, then, is the plague-spot, this the nature of 
the pestilence. Assuredly there is anything but 
exaggeration in this statement. There are manufac- 
turers, we gladly acknowledge it, in our great indus- 
trial districts, who are careful both of the health and 
comfort, and of the morality of their working-men 
and women. 

THE EXTENSION OF INDUSTRY A BLUNDER. 

Thank God this plague- spot, which is a political, 
a social, and a moral blunder, is as yet confined 
within narrow limits ; and in the Middle States, in 
the South, and the growing West, American homes 
are still sanctuaries of domestic virtue and happiness, 

• La Question du Travail dee Femmes en France et a V Stranger % 



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HOW THE CHURCH PROTECTED WOMEN, ETC. 393 

^ woman is not degraded to a something little better 
than a machine, and man is not likely to become a 
socialist, " a working-man made drunk and poisoned 
with the wine of communism and unbelief/' and be- 
coming, living and dying, like the locust plague, the 
curse and blight of a continent which God has made 
so beautiful and so wealthy. 

But, impossible as it is to reach or remedy this 
enormous evil in its effects on family life, on women 
and young girls, we can, at least, try to make our 
instructions and exhortations reach the homes and 
hearts of these vast armies of poor toilers — noble 
toilers, so many of them — worthy of all the sympathy 
and zeal of true-hearted men and women throughout 
the country. 

HOW THE CHURCH PROTECTED WOMEN TOILERS IN 
THE MIDDLE AGES. 

We have related above how the Church, in the 
ages of faith, freed the slave and the serf from their 
bondage; we might have told how she protected 
labour and industry of every description, encourag- 
ing both the freedmen farmers in the country, and 
artisans and labourers in the towns, to form associa- 
tions for mutual aid and defence. She only inter- 
posed her authority to prevent such associations or 
guilds from becoming oppressive to their own 
members, or aggressive towards others. She limited 
her care over them to the securing of obedience of 
the laws of God and the State by every one of their 
members, and to the practice of justice and brotherly 
charity towards each other. As early as the twelfth 
century the industry of the Low Countries (compris- 



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594 the iriimoit of trub womanhood. 



ing the present kingdoms of Holland and Belgium) 
was very much developed, while, on account of the 
very narrow limits of arable land, agricultural occu- 
pations were confined, in some parts, to comparatively 
few. Hence there were many obstacles towards the 
settlement of poor girls, or obtaining proper employ- 
ment for them, and a large proportion of persons of 
the sex were thus forced to live in celibacy, and left 
without any certain means of subsistence. 

It was a sad state of things, for which the Church 
alone, the common parent, could find a remedy. Just 
when this multitude of homeless and unprotected 
women were at their worst, God sent a holy priest 
called Lambert-le-Begue (or Lambert the Stam- 
merer), who united these poor defenceless girls into 
communities, half monastic and half industrial, 
where, living under a rule, and obeying one common 
superior chosen by themselves, all could unite a life 
of retirement and prayer with a life of profitable 
labour — all who chose making the ordinary vows of 
chastity and obedience during the time they chose to 
remain within the protection of the community, the 
others binding themselves to observe the rules while 
living there. Both the civil and the ecclesiastical 
authorities united to secure such a blessed retreat 
from danger or intrusion of any kind ; and thus the 
women toilers who swarmed over the land found 
there either a sweet, safe, and permanent home, if 
they chose to abide there and accept the light yoke 
of the rule, or they found a secure and blissful homo 
— as compared with the lot of their sisters outside — 
while they.laboured for a time in laying up provision 
for the future, and practising all the virtues they 



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HOW THEY ARB TO R3UHESH HEART AND MIND. 395 

might bring with their savings to an independent 
home of their own. 

ADVICE TO YOUNG WOMEN IN FACTORIES. 

As things are in our midst, we can only encourage, 
in our manufacturing towns, young women working 
there, far away from their families, to be most care- 
ful in choosing both their boarding-houses and their 
companions outside of labour hours. Would to God 
there existed in every great industrial centre some reli- 
gious order of women who would provide comfortable, 
airy, and secure homes for these unprotected girls, 
and take a motherly interest in finding them safe 
companions, rational and improving amusements — 
all the means of sweet rest for mind, and heart, and 
body after their long hours of factory work! In 
such retreats, where the pure and pious atmosphere 
of home affection would surround them, the Sunday 
would be truly made for these weary ones a day of 
spiritual and bodily recreation, heart and limbs 
would recover strength enough to face anew the 
labours and trials of the coming week ; and from 
amid the fatigues and depression of the week, these 
poor young toilers could look forward to the repose 
of Sunday, and to the loving care of holy women who 
would combine for them the tenderness of a mother, 
and the trustfulness of a sister. 

HOW THEY ARE TO REFRESH HEART AND MIND. 

The first need of a young girl, thrown a stranger 
into a large workshop, is to find a girl of her own 
age on whom she can lean, and to whom she may 
open her heart. This is an imperious necessity, and 



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396 THE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 

the danger is that, in yielding to it, an untrustworthy 
companion may be chosen. There are many ways to 
avoid a choice so disastrous to the new-comer. It is 
impossible that there should not be, in every large 
workshop, certainly in every factory, some one girl, 
or several, distinguished for goodness, prudence, and 
charity. These are well-known to their companions, 
and a stranger, anxious to find out one such who 
may be a guide and counsellor to her, has only to 
look about her at first. Her own instincts, if she be 
truly good and God-fearing, will soon direct her 
safely, in virtue of that rule by which like soon 
discovers like. Besides, if God places on your path 
a true priest, a man of God, who knows his flock 
well, he will easily and willingly direct you, a 
stranger, and desirous of saving your own soul, to 
some person who will prove a true and trusty friend 
to you. There are, too, in every village and town, 
in every manufacturing centre, several families, at 
least, whose goodness is as well known to all as the 
town-hall or the parish church. Seek an acquaint- 
ance with these. If you be what we have supposed 
you to be, they will have no hesitation in showing 
you kindness and hospitality at first, and then, when 
they know you better, in admitting you to their 
intimacy. It will be a priceless blessing for you to 
find some such a household where your heart can be 
rested and refreshed once a week or more, by breath- 
ing the atmosphere of purity and peace that fills it, 
by letting the loving kindness of true hearts flow 
into your own just as the silent dew, or the soft, 
warm summer rains sink into the thirsty and parched 
earth. And when you are privileged to be received 



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VALUE OP A TRUE FRIEND. 



897 



into such a household, show how highly you value it 
by seeking no other so long as they are contented to 
allow you to find your needed rest and recreation 
there. Let your respect, your gratitude, impel you 
to be more attentive, more kind, more devoted daily 
to every member of the family. 

VALUE OF A TRUE FRIEND. 

Should you not find a family of this description, 
God will send you a true friend; and be both thank- 
ful and devoted to her. Two hearts drawn to each 
other by that love which has God for its principle, 
will find a thousand ways of pleasing each other, will 
be such a rest to each other from care, and grief, and 
discouragement. Two girls truly devoted to each 
other will not fail to devise, from week to week, new 
methods of recreation and amusement. Their good 
share of woman's wit will be good security against 
wearisomeness. But being, as we have said, God- 
fearing, they will both seek together in their exer- 
cises of piety, and the frequent use of the sacraments, 
the surest and sweetest heart-rest within reach of 
the lonely and the toilworn. 

Yes, for everyone of you, poor children of toil, no 
matter on what part of the busy, noisy, wearisome 
factory-world you' happen to read this, be sure that 
there is no refreshment so great and strengthening 
as that which you will get in the heart of a friend 
full of God's love and grace, and in going frequently 
to His heart who is your Eedeemer, and your chief est 
rest on earth and in heaven. 



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BEADING AND MUSIC. 



But the mind also needs repose and refreshment. 
If you have neither books nor other safe amusement, 
try to have the conversation of a friend, when you 
are freed from toil, and talk of pleasant things, 
forgetting the workshop, with its sights and sounds, 
and the whole world of labour and wretchedness 
connected with it. If there are libraries from which 
you can borrow, then try to have some work that can 
really rest your mind, that can take you away into a 
better and brighter world than that in which you are 
condemned to toil on from day to day. If possible, 
read this book aloud with your friend; read in turns, 
and, as well as you can, improving >urselves there- 
by. Should there be singing classes anywhere in 
which you can join, and should God h*ve given you 
a good voice, then learn to sing, and sing with your 
whole soul. The exercise will develop your chest, 
and will give you for after-life a most delightful 
means of recreation for yourself and others. 

Should you be employed on factory work demand- 
ing education and a certain culture, if you have 
learned instrumental and vocal music, then, indeed, 
will it be your own fault if your leisure hours do not 
afford you recreation that will be truly refreshing 
and elevating as well. Cultivate most assiduously 
both of these accomplishments, and make them use- 
ful in lightening the burden and refining the life of 
those of your sister labourers who are less fortunate 
than yourself. 




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BE SAVING OP YOUR WAGES. 



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BEWARE OF EXTRAVAGANCE IK DRESS. 

The temptation to dress as well as the best, and 
then to outshine the most dressy, is one to which 
many girls weakly yield. They forget that this 
temptation leads to others far more fatal, to the love 
of admiration, and to the road to ruin. Dress neatly 
always, never showily; and never be tempted to 
dress beyond your means, or even to go in dress to 
the full limit of your means. Neither men of sense 
nor women of sense admire showy girls ; because they 
are not girls of well-balanced minds, or, but too 
frequently, of trustworthy virtue. Be anxious to 
cultivate both your mind and your heart : store the 
one with useful knowledge and the other with the 
fear and love of God. Showy hats and fine feathers 
often cover brains little better than a peacock's ; and 
a showy silk dress is but a sorry covering for a fickle 
heart or a shaky reputation. 

BE SAVING OF YOUR WAGES. 

No matter how scanty they may be, put by a part, 
though never so small, every week. Your generosity, 
while toiling so hard and rewarded so poorly, must 
be in denying yourself a good many little things, 
which, if indulged in, would not add much to your 
happiness, and would take far too much from your 
little purse. Give moderately to such charities as 
deserve your support : it is not expected of you that 
you can have much to give. And piety does not de- 
mand that you should leave yourself unprovided 
against the day of need. 

BE PURE-HEARTED AND BRAVE-HEARTED. 

You will find among your companions many who 



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400 TIIE MIRROR OF TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



have never stained by deliberate venial sin their 
baptismal robe of innocence. If Q-od has so shielded 
your soul, that you are thus privileged, then no words 
we could address to you could convey suitably our 
sense of the divine mercy in your behalf. You have 
read in the Old Testament, history of the three 
Hebrew children cast into the flaming lurnace by 
order of the impious Babylonian King. God's angel 
was with them in the flame, preventing it from 
harming them, while they sang a hymn of triumph 
to the glory of their Almighty benefactor. 

You know that your soul is as dear to the God who 
created and redeemed it as these souls were to Him 
before he became incarnate. You also know that his 
angel is ever with you to save, befriend, and protect 
you in every danger. It depends on you alone to put 
away that friendship and protection from you, or to 
secure it more and more by your humility and 
fidelity. . 



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THE INVALID MOTHER. 



401 



CFTAPTEE XIX. 

SUPPLEMENTARY. 

As we "began this book by the description of the 
home and its sanctities, so do we now return to it be- 
fore concluding, to point out two of the most precious 
and meritorious forms of motherly devotion — in the 
person of the invalid mother, whom God keeps on her 
bed of sickness for years, like a living lesson of 
heroism in suffering, and the stepmother who takes 
on herself the painful and difficult duties of mother- 
hood towards the children of another. There are so 
many of both of these classes to be found in Christian 
homes — women of angelic lives, models of perfect 
patience and long-suffering meekness ! Let the les- 
sons their examples teach us thus complete the entire 
circle of home-duties and home- virtues. 

THE INVALID MOTHER. 

A young married woman of uncommon beauty and 
accomplishments, extensively known for her success- 
ful activity in every cause of public beneficence or 
usefulness, was paralysed a few months after the 
birth of her sixth child. She was the idol of her 
household and her large circle of acquaintance. For 
she had the rare, rare felicity of creating neither envy 
27 



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402 THl XTBROR OF TRUE W0MA1TH00D. 

nor jealousy by all her shining qualities, and by her 
untiring labours outside of her own home. She had, 
in the truest sense of the word, educated her husband, 
whose mind and heart, both very richly endowed, had 
been neglected, in consequence of the early death of 
his mother ; she had spurred him on to be foremost 
in his profession, and he was almost at its head, when 
this terrible affliction befell them ; and she had made 
him a sincere and practical Christian. She would 
allow no one to teach her little children but herself, 
and her training of them proved that she was just as 
admirable in imparting knowledge as she was in her 
facility for acquiring it. She had three sisters-in-law 
in the house, one her equal in years, and the two 
others her juniors ; she had taught and trained them, 
making them adore her first, and then inspiring 
them with a keen appetite for knowledge. And she 
had made it a duty she never neglected, from the 
very first day she entered her husband's home, to 
catechise her numerous servants, teaching such of 
them as did not know their letters, reading, writing, 
and arithmetic. 

And most touching it was to see the grief and con- 
sternation of these good servants, when it was first 
announced that their worshipped mistress was in 
imminent danger of death. The coachman who was 
sent in haste for the priest — a great, burly, old 
cavalry-man, who had seen twenty battles — could 
scarcely tell his message intelligibly, and wept all 
the way back to the house. The rest of the servants 
were in the hail reciting, as best they could, the 
Litany of the Saints. The little patient herself, and 
her noble husband were worthy of each other, he 



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THE INVALID MOTHBB. 



403 



holding her hand and whispering sweet words of 
comfort and resignation to the Divine Will. But God 
spared that precious life for ten years more. The 
use of her lower limbs, however, she never recovered. 

But — as her husband afterwards testified — never 
once in their most unreserved intimacy, did she ex- 
press the faintest regret at being thus rendered 
inactive and helpless in the very prime of all her 
glorious utility. She would repeat continually, that 
this was God's crowning mercy to her, the pledge of 
her predestination, her being thus nailed to her cross 
with her dear Lord. All her prayers were said, all 
her daily actions performed during these ten years 
in thanksgiving for this most precious boon of 
suffering. 

Nor did she, so far as her physician permitted, and 
when her recovered strength allowed her, give over 
to others the care of instructing her children, or of 
finishing the education of her younger sister-in-law. 
Nor did she discontinue her efforts to benefit the 
poor of the city and neighbourhood, or to encourage 
every project in favour of religion. From her sick- 
bed she still directed all her former fellow-labourers 
who more than ever revered her and followed her 
counsels. 

But who can speak worthily of the devoted care of 
every individual in that household for one so unselfish 
as was their beloved invalid? Her sisters, her 
children, her servants all vied with each other in 
their ardent desire to do her every service her condi- 
tion required. They could scarcely endure to Bee any, 
even among her near relatives, allowed the privilege 
of waiting on her during her long nights of torture ; 



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TBI IfXBBOB 07 TRX7B W01CJUTH00D. 



for the last eighteen months of her life were one 
long agony. Life seemed to retreat slowly from one 
member to another, till she could move nothing but 
her head ; but there the sweet soul dwelt serene to 
the end, like the mistress of an inundated house, as 
the destroying waters rise steadily around her, finds 
her last refuge on the roof-top — there, with cheerful 
countenance and brave, loving words, consoling her 
dear ones while all is slowly undermined and swept 
away beneath her. 

It was indeed, a privilege to listen to the inspired 
words about God, and duty, and bearing the cross 
after Christ, and the glories of the everlasting king- 
dom, that she poured forth unceasingly to all who 
approached her; it was like a lesson from the 
" Imitation of Christ," to look for a few moments on 
that pale, sweet face all aglow with the light and 
love of the world, into which she seemed to have 
entered. . . . And when all was over, and the 
patient sufferer was at rest forever, the noble hus- 
band arose from his knees, and with uplifted arms, 
as if he too would follow his beloved companion, 
exclaimed, " I thank thee, 0 my God ! the lessons of 
such a life and such a death are to me and mine the 
most precious of all thy favours ! " And forthwith 
he made all present unite with him in singing the 
TeDeum. 

How many such mothers are to be found in 
families of all classes, and what beautiful examples 
of filial piety, and unwearied devotedness on the part 
of families, even the poorest and most sadly 
burdened, could we not relate, were it not that we 
are warned to bring these teachings to a timely 
conclusion ! 



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THE 6TBFM0THEB. 



405 



THE STEFMOTHSB. 

"We must not part with this most worshipful 
embodiment of human goodness, the true mother, 
the queen and idol of the home, without doing 
reverence to another figure, often called by death 
and necessity to fill the mother's place in the house- 
hold, and to discharge towards her orphans the 
sacred obligations attached to the place of parent. 

If there is anything on earth which can compensate 
a child for the loss of a mother at that age when the 
inspired love of a true motherly heart can read 
clearly the instincts of the childish soul, and when 
her firm and tender hand is so needed to unfold what 
is good and repress what is evil, that compensation 
can only be found in the womanly wisdom and 
devotion of a second mother, of her whom the world 
outside the family designate as stepmother. 

Bad stepmothers are the exceptions to the gene- 
rality of devoted, conscientious, and self-sacrificing 
women, who are selected by widowed fathers, 
with a fond parental solicitude, to be true mothers 
to their orphaned children. Need we speak here of 
the sore necessity which so often compels a father, in 
whose soul the dead still lives and is loved with an 
enduring love, to choose a second mother for his 
children, a mistress for his household ? Even among 
the upper and wealthy classes, where so many means 
can be devised for obtaining persons to educate 
young orphans, there is often a peremptory reason 
for a second marriage. But among the labouring 
classes this necessity is far otherwise urgent and 
frequent. So, glancing merely at the reasons which 
justify the best of parents in contracting an alliance 



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106 THE MIRROR OP TRUE WOMANHOOD. 



which is repugnant to their own finest sense, and 
without even naming such causes, we proceed to 
plead in favour of the stepmother, before describing 
her duties. 

WHAT MAKES A STEPMOTHER* S POSITION IRKSOME. 

In ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, the relatives 
of a deceased wife, even when they are good and 
virtuous people, look with coldness or aversion on 
the woman who takes the place of mother towards 
the children of their lost daughter and sister. And 
it is almost impossible, if the orphans are of an age to 
understand the difference between a mother and a 
stepmother, that they should not be made to shoT 
these unkindly feelings. The lot of a stepmother is, 
therefore, not an enviable one. And when she is a 
person who accepts the position and its responsibili- 
ties with the firm purpose of doing, to the very best 
of her power, a true mother's part, she is most 
deserving of sympathy, support, and unlimited 
kindness. 

It is most certainly the duty of the deceased wife's 
family, instead of putting an obstacle in the way of 
her successor, to aid her, on the contrary, towards 
the discharge of her difficult and delicate office. It 
is their duty, because the dearest interests of the 
orphans themselves are involved in the education 
their second mother will give them. It would seem, 
then, that every possible consideration of charity and 
self-interest ought to induce both the father's rela- 
tives and those of his deceased wife to join hands in 
making the new mistress of the home welcome, 
cordially welcome; and in aiding her by every 



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WHAT MAXES A STEPMOTHERS POSITION IRKSOME. 407 

demonstration of good will and affection to be, as she 
purposes, a loving mother to the children she takes 
to her heart to cherish and to rear. 

Instead of doing what nature and common sense 
would point out, as the only judicious and beneficial 
course to follow, motives of sordid interest upset both 
the judgment and the conscience even among good 
Christian folk. Thus a serious responsibility is 
incurred through criminal and unwarrantable meddle- 
someness ; the education of the orphans and the 
happiness of their home are forever compromised. 

This, however, is taking things at their worst. 
For the stepmother herself we have none but words 
of encouragement, if she be only bent on doing her 
duty thoroughly. She must make her husband feel 
that she has most truly adopted his children as her 
own. He soon discovers whether her love is a true 
one or not. Nor will his children be long in finding 
out whether or not the heart to which they are 
pressed beats with a genuine motherly tenderness 
for them. The eyes of children are very wise. They 
look into yours with a penetrating and steadfast gaze 
which is like the sounding-rod dropped down into 
the dark, deep waters and bringing up with it the 
secrets of the ocean-bed. You cannot conceal from 
these innocent but infallible eyes the secret of your 
inmost soul. They read you through and through 
in a marvellously brief space of time. 

BEGIN BY LOVING YOUR HUSBAND'S CHILDREN 
AS YOUR OWN. 

This is God's will in your regard ; all his graces 
will aid you towards this most necessary and blissful 



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408 THE MIRBOB OF TEUB WOMANHOOD. 



result. Kesolve, in your heart of hearts, that you 
will be obedient to Him in this, and devote hence* 
forward your whole energy to its attainment. Shall 
we recommend one practice of piety to you, and 
beseech you to be earnest and faithful in its fulfil- 
ment ? From the day you take possession of your 
new home make a league with its guardian angels, 
and take them as your helpers, your counsellors, 
companions, and friends in the difficult task of dis- 
charging your motherly duties. This will be all the 
more necessary for you, if you find that there are 
evil influences at work to wean your children's hearts 
from you. Here is what we recommend in imitation 
of that wonderful man, the Blessed Peter Favre, one 
of the lights of the 16th century, whom popes and 
saints revered during his lifetime as a man filled with 
the Holy Spirit. 

Whenever he spent even a single night in a new 
house, it was his custom on crossing the threshold 
silently to invoke the assistance of the angels to 
whose care it was committed, and, on being shown 
into the apartment prepared for himself, he would 
close the door, and kneel successively in each corner, 
beseeching the Divine Majesty to grant him the 
special protection of the spirits of light, and to drive 
away the spirits of darkness. Then, after reciting 
prayers to the guardian angels, he would sprinkle 
holy water over the room. 

This is not superstition, but enlightened Catholic 
devotion. For the more we study divine things, the 
more light we obtain on the relations between this 
outward world we see and touch and the invisible 
and spiritual world, tfee more does the presence o£ 



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CONCLUSION. 



409 



these spirits, good and evil, become an ever-present 
reality to us. Like Eliseus and his servant, our 
eyes are opened to see the earth and the mountains 
round about covered with horsemen and chariots of 
fire, God's faithful host sent to protect those who do 
his work, and, though we may be appalled some- 
times by the numbers and might of his enemies, we 
shall feel, like the great Hebrew prophet, that there 
are more with us than against us. 

You are a Christian woman ; — you must be a super- 
natural woman. You will have evil passions, earthly 
interests and feelings, and the malignant influences 
of the fallen angels to counteract; but you will have 
on your side God and his angels ; you will have the 
love, the veneration, the unbounded confidence of 
your husband. You will also have the pure and 
devoted love of his children ; for true love cannot 
help being loved in return. But all this must be 
the result of your own supernatural devotion and 
piety. 

CONCLUSION. 

And so we are still before the Christian Home, 
with the hosts of the guardian spirits camped round 
about, visible to the eye of our soul, like the lights 
of a great city seen through a mist from an over- 
hanging mountain. Here are mothers, worthy of 
being on earth, the living images of God's unsleep- 
ing watchfulness and unfathomable tenderness; 
daughters formed to their mother's perfect likeness, 
all innocence, self-denial, and unsparing devotion to 
the happiness of others ; sons worthy to be the un- 
selfish servants of such mothers and such sisters, 



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410 THE MIRROR OF TRITE WOMANHOOD. 



trained to be the fearless and spotless knights of 
Truth and Justice in the evil days, and the promoters 
of all true liberty and progress in the peaceful days — 
at all times the true sons of God ; the vast armies of 
the daughters of toil, each bearing on her forehead 
the sign of Christ, each keeping her eyes fixed on 
Him whose whole life was labour, and crucifixion, 
and a martyrdom; and above all this vast and 
glorious array, the heavens, opened, as in the vision 
of the great Patriarch, a pathway, like a far-stretch- 
ing flight of shining steps ascending from earth to 
the Oity of God on high, the wide gates thrown open, 
angels of light ever moving along them in their 
brotherly ministration, and the Eternal God and 
Father of ail amid the myriads of angels and saints, 
bending down to us with outstretched arms and 
radiant oountenance, while these words fall upon our 
ears and sink into our souls, like sounds of divinest 
music on the hushed waters : — 

" Blessed are the poor! . . . Blessed are the 
meek ! • . . Blessed are they that mourn ! . . . 
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after jus- 
tice ! . . . Blessed are the merciful ! . . . Blessed 
are the clean of heart ! . . . Blessed are the peace- 
makers ! • • . Blessed are they that suffer persecu- 
tion I ... Be glad and rejoice, for your reward is 
very great in heaven ! n 



M. H. Gill & Son, Printers, Dublin. 

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